Artificial intelligence still has some way to go

Kind of makes you sad if you think about it

I don't know, CP/M never gave me a blue screen.

MacOS never brings me flowers

https://arstechnica.com/information-technology/2017/05/an-ai-invented-a-bunch-of-new-paint-colors-that-are-hilariously-wrong/

It's a great read, but this color list is worth it all by itself.

https://cdn.arstechnica.net/wp-content/uploads/2017/05/Screenshot-51817-1211-PM-640x930.jpeg

hilariously RIGHT more like

Light of Blast

"We're still deciding between Stanky Bean and Bank Butt for the master bedroom, but the bathroom is definitely going to be Turdly."

poll please

Burble Simp is a cool name

Burble Simp Shrimp Company

how is this not an april fools joke
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/northamerica/usa/11031451/Where-should-I-bury-my-roommate-Ask-Siri.html

Our D.C. office building got a security robot. It drowned itself.

We were promised flying cars, instead we got suicidal robots. pic.twitter.com/rGLTAWZMjn

— Bilal Farooqui (@bilalfarooqui) July 17, 2017

whoa at Siri's answer though, from that murder story - maybe AI doesn't have that much further to go after all

Whoa, whose side are you on anyway?

Just wait until we find the first AI-accountable mass grave of humans.

I mean it sounds to me like Siri has already done that, possibly multiple times

https://www.theverge.com/2017/7/17/15980954/elon-musk-ai-regulation-existential-threat

someone else has been playing watch dogs 2

uh
https://www.wired.com/video/2017/07/how-a-son-made-a-chat-bot-of-his-dying-dad/

i mean everybody gets to deal with death differently and maybe it's not that different from looking at pictures in an album but really wtf

BLACK MIRROR

Bob: I can i i everything else

Alice: balls have zero to me to me to me to me to me to me to me to me to

Bob: you i everything else

Alice: balls have a ball to me to me to me to me to me to me to me to me

http://gizmodo.com/no-facebook-did-not-panic-and-shut-down-an-ai-program-1797414922

i spend a lot of time fearing some of the repercussions of AI, especially to the extent that they're controlled by corporations.

but for once i'll revive this with a positive thought, which is that i can't fucking WAIT until the day that we can speak directly to people who speak other languages and have everything automatically translated for us so quickly that we barely have to pause. that is something that i think will happen very soon, definitely within my lifetime and probably within 5-10 years, and it will truly be life changing for many many people.

Doesn't google translate already do that?

yeah, exactly! i guess i mean cranking the voice recognition up a notch and and integrating it into more devices and platforms worldwide so that it's just kind of expected that both parties to the cross-language conversation will be familiar with the tech and ready to go. like right now, i could skype with someone in italy and awkwardly record what the other person says and dump it into google translate and then come up with my response and dump it back into translate and send it back over (or do it all via text, slightly faster), but it would be weird and cumbersome, and at the beginning of the call there would be awkward moments as we establish the procedure. but in the translation AI dreamworld, the call starts, i say hello, the other person automatically hears "ciao", they respond and I automatically hear "who the fuck are you, how did you get my #?" or whatever. the dream

uh Karl the google translate app does that, you speak and when you pause it repeats what you just said in another language

I guess you mean real-time overlay but it’s a little smarter in that it does sentence grammar things because languages put subject/verb/predicate in different orders

Well shoot, we are living in a dream. I guess the tech is already there but the social norms haven't adjusted (It still seems ridiculous to bust out a phone to use google translate in the heat of the moment)

Karl, maybe this is more like what you intended: https://asia.nikkei.com/Business/AC/Baidu-s-talking-translator-gives-tourists-a-hand

I definitely wouldn't use it to discuss trade secrets or anything (although I suppose that's true with Google Translate, too).

lol
https://matome.naver.jp/odai/2150702724725936101

actually howzabout this Karl:
https://arstechnica.com/gadgets/2017/10/google-pixel-buds-are-wireless-earbuds-that-translate-conversations-in-real-time/

Now that’s what I’m talking about.

Ooooh yeah, that’s the stuff. Wave of the future.

i wanna know if those work with an iphone because if so, sold

While FAR better than hand gestures and hesitant exchanges in pidgin, there's still enough slack in both voice recognition and Google Translate that it will be years before they get those Pixel Buds past the stage of making comical errors. Intriguing, though, and definitely the wave of the future.

They need to rig it so the Pixel phone's onboard speaker can get in on the act, too.

so we can use two pixels to bounce a dirty word back and forth in two languages of course

https://medium.com/kylevogt/how-were-solving-the-lidar-problem-8b4363ff30db

SAN FRANCISCO — The self-driving car is edging closer to becoming driverless.

Waymo, the autonomous car company from Google’s parent company Alphabet, has started testing a fleet of self-driving vehicles without any backup drivers on public roads, its chief executive said Tuesday. The tests, which will include passengers within the next few months, mark an important milestone that brings autonomous vehicle technology closer to operating without any human intervention.

Dozens of companies are testing self-driving technology on public roads across the United States and some autonomous features are available in today’s cars. But Waymo is believed to be the first company to test vehicles on public roads without a driver ready to take over in an emergency.

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/11/07/technology/waymo-autonomous-cars.html

edging closer to saving many lives

Ironically, hands free driving will likely lead to a lot of in car edging

it's like rain on your wedding day
it's a hands-free ride when you've already edged

i wonder if the engineers have thought about what to do about the rise in masturbation in driverless cars

the LIDAR is powered by a thermoelectric mitten in a system that just assumes you will always be masturbating

karl you are winning today

i wonder if the engineers have thought about what to do about the rise in masturbation in driverless cars

those sensors have to work with just as much accuracy pointed inwards if they want to avoid being a fleet of mobile toilets

every day is a new opportunity

similar to how a solution to secure voting systems might be a return to paper ballots, maybe driverless taxies will just install a security camera pointing at the passenger and a sign saying "you're on camera!".

this is all pretty gross but i kind of like this idea of a really seedy driverless future

anonymous cam-porn in driverless ubers is a million dollar idea waiting to happen

do we have a "million dollar idea waiting to happen" thread? i should get on that.

http://www.sfgate.com/news/article/Driverless-shuttle-bus-crashes-after-launch-in-12342316.php

whoa
https://i.imgur.com/Z9LzJXV.png

(full video at https://imgur.com/gallery/zzQv0NB)

(see also https://imgur.com/gallery/zzQv0NB)

dammit i meant (see also https://i.imgur.com/ACwNd7Q.gifv)