Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

a good coworker has predicted “fireworks” during his group meeting next week where the ridiculous manager I’ve complained about will be attending. apparently the last full group meeting they had ended poorly and with the manager in town, there may be torches and pitchforks

A little off-topic, what I learned from that Italian class (which I was taking for work anyway) - never say, "quanti ani hai" instead of "quanti AN-NI hai". Pronounce both of the "n"s or else you're saying "how many assholes do you have?"

Sounds like a Jurassic Park question

And then having to get up really early in the morning so I can come in to work early because I have to clean up a mess someone else made. My health is no good, I can't keep living without sleep, I'm cleaning this shit up for free (because we're all screwed if someone doesn't). I'm too old to find a new job so all I can do is make these sacrifices in hopes that maybe someone will eventually care that I did all of that work.

Maybe just run through exactly what you all put in each one of your variously coloured bins one more fucking time.

Every time there is a mass behavioral issue to solve with our representatives, I get met with blank stares when I ask if anybody surveyed the people who made the mistake why they thought this was the correct way to do it.

Kinda amazes me that people who get paid three times my salary don't understand that solving a widespread behavioral problem requires understanding the root cause first.

Bring in the consultants for that, on their even more inflated day rates!

We all occasionally hit send before we realize we've mistyped an email address. It happens, we're human. We might even occasionally have a bad day and punch in the wrong address several times over before we finally get it right. But when we just keep forwarding that same email until it finally reaches its recipient but don't bother to delete all of the previous failed attempts from the body of said email, it might appear to the recipient as if we're suffering from an as-yet-undiagnosed neurological condition.

imo this person thinks it's your fault for having the wrong address and wants to show you what you did

That actually happens! Semi-regularly! 'I have already attempted to send this to you three times previously with no response. (scroll down and see multiple instances of the email being sent to nonexistent addresses)'

I'm like 94% convinced that our CEO is some sort of warlock who feeds on the cognitive capacity of anyone who works for or with us. As if my dumb ass alone isn't evidence of that theory.

I'm still getting messages on my personal email address for some electrical contractor in Florida, despite having emailed the offender that they have the wrong address.

I have a lot of information about what devices are installed at a certain mouse-governed theme park due to their continued confusion and have yet to determine what to do with it.

Is there way way to hack their fast passes?

Just send it to the mouse guys and ask are you okay with your business information being shared this way. Should get a pretty swift reaction.

wtf dude I'm not shutting off the faucet

i get a lot of misdirected emails to my personal address and when I reply to say "you've got the wrong email address" the usual response is "well this is the one you/your colleague/Todd gave to me, which one am I supposed to use???"

xp sorry I thought you wanted that, but play on, play on

I have a lot of information about what devices are installed at a certain mouse-governed theme park due to their continued confusion and have yet to determine what to do with it.

Please note that utility data for the entire campus is also included. This was the only data made available with the application, and in order to accurately estimate and verify savings, individual building meter data will need to be obtained from the campus.

I have quite a common name and get a lot of Gmail meant for other people: medical details, flight tickets etc., which I guess is often the result of people entering their own email addresses wrongly when they place the order. Who does that?

loads of people it seems

I get gmails for some guy in Wisconsin who buys a deer-hunting license every year, some guy in Ireland who does something to do with horse racing, timesheets for a temp worker in the midlands (that was a bit of a weird one, since I am from the midlands and my namesake was working not far from where I grew up)

I used to reply telling them but it doesn't make any difference, they just keep on coming.

So I work in the nonprofit division of a company that, by and large, handles for-profit business. The primary email address I monitor consists entirely of the word 'nonprofit' before the @. Not a lot of ambiguity there. So when I regularly receive emails that are like 'yeah hi would you be interested in this retail auto parts franchise' I have to wonder what people think 'nonprofit' means. Or if they've ever given it any thought. Or if they think. Gag me. With a spoon.

i get a lot of misdirected emails to my personal address and when I reply to say "you've got the wrong email address" the usual response is "well this is the one you/your colleague/Todd gave to me, which one am I supposed to use???"

― kinder, Friday, December 20, 2019 3:27 AM bookmarkflaglink

Lol "don't you tell me you're not the right person!" always blows my mind. i have a dude at work whose name is exactly the same as mine, sans three letters (first and last) so the same would sometimes happen to me.

So they'd email me when they wanted him and I'd say "you really mean this guy" and give them the right contact and they go WELL MY BOSS TOLD ME YOU WERE THE PERSON.

"I think i know who I am, athankyou"

You think. Which means you can't say for sure.

C'mon. Stop fuckin' with me, Neondirtpal.

My boss is trying to convince my coworker to buy the business bc she wants to retire

She wants $250k

The company hasn’t made a profit in years

She has been loaning the business money each year for years

How does she think my coworker could get a loan to buy a unprofitable business?

A couple weeks ago coworker told me she had a meeting set up with boss so she could present a business proposal (let coworker run the business for a year, split profits, pay boss a salary*, boss doesn’t have to do anything, see if coworker can make the business work before committing to purchase). Coworker is surprised bc boss says she also has a business proposal.

Coworker comes back from meeting and when I ask what boss’ proposal was she says 0_o boss suggested a new way of merchandising the stores 0_o

That was her bUsinESs pRopOsaL

*boss has not been paying herself a salary for years. We recently got audited.

Boss has somehow kept this v badly run business afloat for 40 yrs
NB her side hustle is landlord to several properties in the Bay Area and New Zealand

Some people have weird ass vanity businesses. it's so strange. I had a friend that asked if I would take her daytime shifts in a small, typical trendy boutique in the east village for two weeks ( I did not work there at all and supposedly the owner was fine with her asking whoever for two weeks). There were some days not a single person would come in. I think I sold 4 things the entire time I was there. The owner did not seem bothered.

Oh my boss goes hard out with this business and is v invested in it, she’s just not good at it

I know there are a myriad of reasons those businesses exist, especially ones that are very boutique and sell $$ over short periods to moneyed clients or are a hobby for a rich person, but my go-to thought is always money laundering

She could never work for anyone so she had to go into business for herself. She has a v scatterbrained approach to everything and constantly contradicts herself. The only reason she’s managed this long (apart from injecting more outside money into it every year) is bc we have little competition

I always think it's a money laundering front too. xpost

I always liked how Rice to Riches was set up to launder money and then it unexpectedly became a successful business. That was rice pudding was really good. I think there was a pizza place front in blyn too that unexpectedly became really popular too.

I did not know that about Rice to Riches.
Should've guessed something was dodgy; they serve COLD rice pudding.

I only like cold rice pudding!

cold rice pudding is extremely common ime

especially if not made at home, like nearly any Greek or Turkish or Lebanese takeaway place will have tubs of it in the drinks fridge to grab and go

I'm like 94% convinced that our CEO is some sort of warlock who feeds on the cognitive capacity of anyone who works for or with us. As if my dumb ass alone isn't evidence of that theory.

― i was so hungry that i ate a hole cake entirely to myself (Old Lunch)

on december 19, 2019, old lunch discovered the secret of capitalism

PLEASE stop your loud + impassioned discussion about the panoply of delicious foodstuffs on the McDonald's menu. PLEASE. Can you seriously not see my soul wrenching itself free from my body?

moving to a new even-more-open office next week— like i think we’re just sitting next to each other at tables or something

stoked for the intimacy

I hate it. I hate it so, so much. Like I don't care what point I am in the process, if I'm ever interviewing for a different job and discover that they've been infected with this open office insanity I am OUT.

And almost as if on cue, desk drumming begins from two rows behind me, with an unrestrained force + volume that might almost be comical under other circumstances.

How about instead of an open office we go for soundproofed cages. How about that.

don't move to the UK, pretty much all offices are open offices. I've never worked in one that wasn't. at my current job not even the CEO has their own office. they just sit at a bank of desks next to the one my team sits at

I'm sure there are more interactive work circumstances where such a layout is beneficial and makes sense but a workspace where people are largely just trying to concentrate on their own shit while contending with a smattering of hosebeasts with inadequate self-control is not among those circumstances.

I doubt it tbh. it's about cost-saving, not making work better. office space costs money

(Apologies, did not realize the antiquated slang term 'hosebeast' is apparently a gendered insult. Mine is an equal opportunity ire directed at anyone across the spectrum who logs into their work station and proceeds to behave as if they're at a foam party.)

Came in today to teach a 13 person class..five showed up. Seems six of the eight no-shows were pulled from the class (with nobody telling us), two that were terminated (with nobody telling us).

The only reason we had two classes today was because mine was supposed to have 13. We could have just folded this into one class.

So the class is now down to two people because they found out four of the six had already taken the class (how nobody figured this out before now is beyond me). Two is below the minimum requirements for a class.

The only reason I'm salty about it is it's 8 hours of talking, but if they'd told us in advance, we could have had one class and two of us could have shared it, giving me a break now and then.

Also who schedules training around New Years ffs

moving to a new even-more-open office next week — like i think we’re just sitting next to each other at tables or something

fucking loud in here, and not because anyone in particular is being loud, but just that there are so many people and so little to absorb the sound

at least there's free selzer on tap i guess

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FUCK OFF EPIC GAMES.

...sorry this was better for the missent email thread I guess lol