Words, usages, and phrases that annoy the shit out of you...

seeing "simp" used a lot as basically synonym for beta, cuck, thirsty. which is particularly boring because it's being treated as if it were a "new" word or new usage

When it calls me a customer rather than a passenger.

while in line at a pharmacy i was recently summoned with 'next guest, please'

foh

I've also heard, "Following guest!" at a store, can't remember where or when.

I used to work retail with a woman who would say, "I can help whomever's next!" and I had to put in a lot of time and research convincing her it was "whoever." It ended up being a whole store-wide argument w/ customers weighing in.

"it's a bop"

Wait, strictly speaking isn't "whomever" right in this context?

I don't get the "following customer, please" thing in the States. What's wrong with "next customer, please"? Do they think next is too abrupt a word or something?

service culture in the states is cringe

gimme a sulky teen barely bothering to avoid you with the splash any day

uh in a catering context youse guttersnipes

I'm terrible at explaining grammar because I never learned all the proper terms, but here goes: "Whoever" is correct because while "I" is the subject of the sentence (I can help), "Whoever" is the subject of the clause "whoever is next" and the clause doesn't change. (It's possible I've used the word "clause" wrong here, but you get the idea.)

Ah, that makes sense - thanks.

Linguist answer: just use "who" all the time, for many people "whom" is now analyzed as simply the formal/marked archaic version of "who" and the case distinction it used to mark (nominative vs objective) is handled unambiguously with word order. Which is probably why you're still hearing customer service people use it, since formal = polite.

That said, credit to the who-words for hanging on to the most distinctive forms of any pronoun for the longest time (pour one out for "whosever")

I think I am as at least as likely to say whomsoever as whomever!

I'm a populist, I say "who-all's"

'm terrible at explaining grammar because I never learned all the proper terms, but here goes: "Whoever" is correct because while "I" is the subject of the sentence (I can help), "Whoever" is the subject of the clause "whoever is next" and the clause doesn't change. (It's possible I've used the word "clause" wrong here, but you get the idea.)

― Lily Dale, Thursday, February 6, 2020 4:15 PM (three hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

I don't think that's correct. 'Whoever' is the object that the subject is helping, regardless of the clause. We say 'I can help her/him' not she/he. Technically whomever is correct, but no one says it because it sounds stupidly pedantic, like this post.

Another example is "there's loads of ..."

I use a website for work which allows one to select 'more search options' or 'less search options' and the latter drives me fuuuuuuuucken crazy.</pedant>

we could've cured cancer by now if we didn't get distracted by pointless grammar issues

or should that be "hadn't"??

Correcting grammar is just another of the million ways we pretend that patting sand onto our orderly castle is going to keep the tides of chaos from wiping that fucker out.

I don't think that's correct. 'Whoever' is the object that the subject is helping, regardless of the clause. We say 'I can help her/him' not she/he.

Not quite. The entire clause is the object. "I can help whomever" is fine, I think, though you probably still shouldn't say it because it sounds weird. But once you make it "Whoever is next," it has to stay that way.

Think about another example: "I am going to punch whomever ate my sandwich." "Whomever ate my sandwich" is clearly wrong, and any sentence that requires you to say it is wrong.

Anyway, I wasn't trying to get this thread embroiled in a long grammar discussion, just pointing out that how frustrating it can be when retail-speak combines with hypercorrection.

"pointing out how frustrating it can be" is of course what I meant to type.

had to create 'work goals' for myself

decided fuck it and used the word 'onboarding'

i got sighted on that onboarding, mookieproof, and decided to give it a deep dive

Let me know once you’ve bottomed that out

is it me or our nine out of people pronouncing the word pundits "pundiNts"?

haven't noticed that yet, but have noticed people pronouncing tenets "tenants."

don’t be pedatic

. be pedan✓

Restauranteurs

Criteria instead of criterion

oh FUCK yes

Always enjoy pulling out my Criteria Collection Videodrome

Videodome, I think you'll find

All That Jizz

Levelling up

I blame Scott Pilgrim for that one

Criteria instead of criterion

My organisation works with universities and we come into contact with consortia and alumni. For many of my colleagues these have now become the singular form of the words, and daily I hear people talking about "a consortia" and "an alumni".

One of my favorite-ever Futurama jokes was that the idiotic Fry knows the correct usage.

https://morbotron.com/meme/S01E08/19419.jpg?b64lines=V293LCBJIGxvdmUKIHN5bXBvc2lhLg==

similar to how people will say "so and so is BIAS"

"bias" without the "ed" and "graduated school" without the "from" are my all-time least-favorite, most-annoying things

"Graduated school" or "graduated college" seem like very Midwestern/Great Lakes regional usages to me, along with eliminating the "to be" from phrases like "the lawn needs mowed" or "the clothes need washed." I've been hearing those all my life, so they never seemed unusual to me.

People are pretty pleased with themselves for using alumnus, alumna, and alumni correctly, but you can still sometimes zing them with alumnae.

alumnopodes

alumnopotamus

alumninium

rock-ribbed

don't say "effort" when you mean LP or CD or release -- "bryan ferry's first solo effort" -- bcz it makes you sound like a condescending smug and bad teacher who shd immediately fuck off

^ otm

"fell pregnant"

Sounds like a calque from the French 'tomber enceinte'.

that annoys the shit out of me too