Real love -- I'm, like, searchin' for that Queer Love -- LGBTQIA+ Love // A Thread for the Real Ones

hope your friend is hanging in there <3

xp y0ung?? she fuckin KILLED it (as per usual). I hope they post a recording of the livestream.

I've been listening to a lot of RuTH lately 🌄🌄🌄

yes Stevie, that Ann4

o boy what a life we lead really

so I'm not sure when the next time I'll "meet" someone is, let's call it, due to extenuating circumstances

do i care?

will i ever go out to a bar and pick someone up again? i had occasional game. all of a sudden I'd love to meet someone younger than me. i usually don't gravitate to that realm. i wonder what that's about

you will absolutely go out to a bar and pick someone up again, it is so inevitable

Date tonight. At a (rooftop) bar. I shoulda asked if he's jabbed.

first date? how did you meet? brown hair, big heart, bat eyelashes?

you know Stevie it's just at first it was pandemia, and then health stuff that's going to take another 6 months to settle. just didn't realize I'd be singing the same tune for the goddamn 3-year dark ages. but whatever i'm going to get so many beauty treatments when this is all through I plan on looking like Princess Jasmine meets Bella Hadid. mark my words.

also i quit smoking forever and it's truly something else. going on 6 months.

my new issue of BUTT just arrived!!!!!!!!!

omg i already read some of the poems
how is it at large?

is it large?

C'mon Simone, let's talk about your big "but."

I haven't read it yet bcz I got it at work and then *brag alert* went straight to my fuck buddy's house for a cute date and only just got home a few hours ago!!!

butts all around

butts rule everything around me

OK SO
I'm not a butt man and i keep feeling more and more alone
like American men are just obsessed with them
i feel like there's something wrong with me

Stevo you're killin it these days

don't care about the outside, it's what's inside that counts imo

like the way it feels?

yeah! i mean not to get too tmi or too cliche i guess but i just think anuses are this incredible part of us lol and i really like experiencing them.

So! My Saturday night date sold me out. I suspected trouble when I had to text him 15 mins before meeting: he was running late thanks to a "minor emergency" at his parents', whatever that means (what's a "minor" emergency?). Luckily a friend kept me company at the bar.

An hour later, date texts: "On my way, send location address plz?" That's the last I heard of him. For a while I thought he died -- until I saw a an Instagram post Sunday morning.

He's 24, a former student who emailed me four years after class to ask about getting a beer or coffee. On determining he was queer he gushed: he praised my self-assurance, brains, looks, etc. We might've met that night had I not plans already. It's worth noting I barely remember this kid in summer 2018.

I wonder if simply not showing up is a phenomenon of the young?

Anusii are a cliche?

that sucks. definitely hit next. it's been a phenomenon of the young and old as long as i've been dating tbh. xp

Yeah, I wanted to avoid generational generalization, but a few viejos noted The Vanishing has been more prevalent in the last four years.

I've ghosted more than my share, I should note.

I have never done this, to my knowledge?

me eiths it's dumb
I'm too polite though

wassup homieslice

good morning!

Mornin' sunshine!
What's on the platter?

I'm vegetarian tonight.

sexually or culinarily?

Lady Bracknell : Well, both, if necessary, I presume!

So, I’m in one of the only two gay bars in Marbella (southern coast of Spain) right now, and the thing here is that high heeled shoes are passed around, everyone tries them on, and then they take their turn swishing down what passes for a catwalk. Pleased to report that my boy got the loudest applause of the night. We make our own entertainment.

The bar is filling up because at 4am they close the doors, bring out the ashtrays, and everyone can smoke indoors.

We will be back tomorrow for drag queen bingo.

omgggggg jealous

Oh I forgot to mention the seventy something naked woman who did her catwalk turn clutching a large stuffed teddy bear.

stop

jealz to the max

Just ended a fabulous evening with j0rdan.

yesss. what did y'all do?

we went to a sports bar so i could watch basketball while we talked about madonna

...and Mariah Carey. And my terrible non-date last week.

ok well that sounds ideal (sorry for the delay how the hell do three days go by?!)

you know i saw Madonna's Mme X tour
she could still put on a show, i just wonder if it isn't time for her to maybe think about doing something else

we had dinner with Stevie last night!! and then he came back to our place and we plied him with amaro and we talked about sheryl crow and natalie merchant and celine dion and it was just a total delight <3

Amaro! Sheryl Crow! Sounds like my kind of night.

sounds like a blast

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHxbxAQSQMM

uhhhhhh i had no idea wallace shawn was in a chaka khan video lol

he's in everything!
also I'm pretty sure I've had that night before lol so fun xp ❤️

“Baby Beluga in the deep blue sea
please to send bobs and vagene”

nasty pig going in on the blue wave

💙 BLUE 💙: Teddy Hoodie & Sweatpant out now

yall, the queers at the gym this morning were beaming.

I sent a couple congratulatory messages to some American homos who’d appreciate them

ok so i feel the urge to share gym locker room stories because i guess i'm in my locker room fantasy era. tmi obviously.

right so my gym is very gay and cruisy. i enjoy a silent strut to the sauna for a 20 minute sit and then a shower afterward, with only a towel covering me - i'm a bit of an exhibitionist - and also our shower at home is broken right now so i have a utilitarian excuse. an alarming number of guys sit in the sauna with clothes and socks and shoes on, which is just gross imo, but anyway. the shower stalls have whatever that generic hard material paneling is that separates toilets in most public restrooms, with the same foot-high gap between the panel and the floor. the floor is shiny especially when wet which means you can see a reflection from the neighboring shower. i'll get hard and show off in the floor reflection which leads to handjobs under the stall. there isn't a lot of room there for much else so i'll cool it after a few minutes though a few times i've let one rip. you can't see anything but a hand. i get turned on by that kind of clandestine anon stuff. ONE TIME HOWEVER this guy SLID HIS QUITE LONG LEGS UNDER the gap giving me access to his butt, and i fingered him for a bit hahaha.

my favorite thing though is if you sit in one corner of the sauna, you have a direct line of sight to a particularly active corner of the locker room, and i really enjoy sitting there and watching guys take their clothes off, and i think most of them enjoy being watched. i like the thrill of getting hard under my towel and wondering if anyone notices.

oh well that last part wasn't exactly hidden, seems appropriate.

my gym is very gay & cruisy too, the sauna can get pretty active. what cracks me up is the way guys choose to reveal and flash themselves, some guys have quite elaborate rituals, it's such a courting procedure, it really can mimic the way birds carefully but sort of inscrutably arrange twigs and flowers to attract a mate. it's fun tho, in this sense the gym is kind of a portal back into a different world before apps and instagram, where you find yourself among a community of people all eyeing each other clandestinely in an effort to decipher a bunch of conscious and unconscious signals regarding possible gayness and then as you get into the locker room and even further into the sauna, signals regarding possible openness to sexual encounters at the gym itself. it's like being in a little terrarium, i go to the gym w/ two of my close friends and we're always delighting in updating our collective mental rolodex regarding who might be gay, straight, who is taking their clothes off in the locker room, who isn't, what they're doing or not doing in the sauna, new characters appear, some make their presence known immediately, some seem to disappear but then suddenly pop up again. i primarily work out bcuz it makes me feel better mentally & physically but part of my attraction to the gym and this gym specifically is getting to be one star in this little constellation of gay guys.

the jerking off certainly doesn't hurt either! it's funny, this sauna is positioned directly in front of a row of lockers in the locker room, the door is glass and you can see fully in and out from either side, tho of course depending on your angle you may or may not see certain things. the main section of the locker room is not near the sauna, but people who choose a locker in front of the sauna door do usually find themselves with an audience. of course for many that is the point, and i include myself in that group. i'm actually somewhat shocked by how reticent most men appear to be when it comes to nudity in the locker room. i like to show off and be looked at in that context so i'm happy to change my clothes the way i would normally, or dry off after a shower more or less the way i would at home, i'm not constantly covering myself up w/ a towel or quickly putting my underwear on under my towel as i'm dripping wet. and my willingness to get naked especially in front of the sauna is of course a signal to anyone who may be watching or passing by that i am down to show off and do even more in the sauna. our showers are enclosed so on the one hand we don't get that kinda reflective showing off & jerking that map is talking about however if you're willing to take on some level of risk you can sneak off into the shower w/ a guy from the sauna. i've had some fun doing this, sometimes guys get scared and break it off, most guys in the sauna usually just want to jerk there but you will get some head nods towards the back of the locker room. regardless it's maybe the one place i can somewhat regularly experience hooking up w/ a stranger purely off non verbal signals, and not in the context of a sex party or something where everyone is doing that, and there is definitely some part of me that appreciates that the gym provides this sort of very classic gay experience that is otherwise very hard to find these days

the hidden text function being /h is cracking me up, in this context

Because it’s short for handjob

I go to a “queer-inclusive” gym where literally none of that happens lol. The sauna is tiny and unisex and there are rules that you have to cover up your gennies. The K-town spas otoh are of course fertile hunting grounds for horny gay guys, and while I have partaken in action, tbh 95% of the time if I’m at a sauna I’m there for its intended rejuvenation purposes and not really looking for a quickie.

[show handjob text]

great post j! i agree with so much of that. this:

i primarily work out bcuz it makes me feel better mentally & physically but part of my attraction to the gym and this gym specifically is getting to be one star in this little constellation of gay guys.

yes, definitely. birds of a feather. i like seeing who works out next to me in the hope that i notice them. i used to really resent the social aspect at the gym, because i'm very hardcore about presence and body awareness in exercise and it's basically an extended meditation ritual for me. and for real it's still a hard and fast rule that i don't talk to anyone while i'm working out. i just don't want to. i'd rather work out! and after too long there i'm definitely ready to be released from all of the energy chaos in a crowded space. but i'm not actually resentful anymore and i think people can tell in my body language, so there is friendly physical energy from others i'm feeling all the time. i smile a lot more than i used to - mostly because of the music in my over-ear headphones - but i'll give people a passing smile or whatever. a quick nod to all the cuties around the cable station.

i'm happy to change my clothes the way i would normally, or dry off after a shower more or less the way i would at home, i'm not constantly covering myself up w/ a towel or quickly putting my underwear on under my towel as i'm dripping wet.

agree! i find pleasure in trying to be as relaxed as possible. i used to be so petrified of being naked in locker rooms. i've "worked on" my confidence over the years and it feels great to feel at home in a locker room, more or less. part of that for me has also been just gaining a lot of confidence in the gym and in "physical culture" - learning i don't have to play a particular sport to be athletic.

i'll also just add - being into masculinity myself to the point that i'd describe myself as an androphile - the locker room has so much potential energy in that department. i like getting a power trip from it. one time i was changing and there was this guy talking to a "bro" on his cell about playing football and knocking other weaker guys down - i wonder sometimes if the conversation was real or just a one-sided monologue to set a scene - and it brought that out for me. i know we all decry locker room talk but i'd thrill to hear some haha.

Yeah I’ve never hooked up in a locker room. Learning that my regular begular college gym was a breeding ground, decades after the fact, was somewhat of a surprise to me. I did accidentally catch sight of at least one unconcealed boner in the years I went and showered there, but yeah my interest was fitness and hygiene

i'm not as judgy as i used to be but i will roll my eyes a little bit at boys who use a few machines as a convenient excuse to do what they really want to do, flounce around for attention. when i'm grumpy i'll think to myself pick up some weights for god's sake you silly hoe! my thing is more the earnest jocks - or the outdoorsy ones - who take it somewhat seriously. i nurse a few little crushes who i never speak to or make eye contact with haha.

because of the specific nature of the gyms i frequent and their amenities, there is no cruising happening.

at my old climbing gyms in the Bay Area, it was much more cruisy. but that’s just the Bay!

i know we all decry locker room talk but i'd thrill to hear some haha.

― old helen (map^2), Tuesday, November 10, 2026 5:25 PM (yesterday)

last week i was sitting in the locker room and this mid 20s guy comes up to me and is like, wow dude you look so much like my friend from behind, you guys have the same hair i thought it was him that's crazy. and i'm like, oh haha yeah that's wild. he's like, my friend is in the shower right now i hope he comes out soon so you can see. i'm like, ok same (lol). so we make small talk for a minute, he has longer hair too so we're talking about hair journeys, he's being unusually friendly/talkative for a random guy in the gym, especially someone a bit younger, he seemed straight to me, pretty harmless, it was a cute little convo but i'm still like, i'm not entirely sure what is going on here. anyway i need to change into my gym clothes & this guy is at a locker right next to me, so i'm like, lemme just test the waters here and get naked next to this guy as i change and see what happens, sometimes guys get a little spooked or whatever if someone disrobes next to them, but this guy just keeps chatting w/ me, at a certain point he's like "oh whoops i put my underwear on backwards i need to take my clothes off again sorry" and i'm like "well it's all good man i was just naked too haha" then his friend comes out of the shower, tbh to me he looked a lot like joe keery from stranger things, not sure i saw the resemblance except that we both have brown hair down past our cheekbones. in any event, the three of us continue chatting about our hair, we are all post pandemic long hair neophytes, the guy who got out of the shower is drying off but doing so in a way that doesn't reveal anything, he puts his boxers on under his towel, i'm like right. but then he takes one of the blow dryers and pulls the waist of his boxers away and starts blow drying his crotch, he does this for like 30 seconds and in making sure his crotch was fully dry he's now starting to show off his pubes, all while the three of us are still just chatting away, and i'm like, looking at this guy's face and then his pubes and then back to the first guy, back to this guy, back down to his pubes, back to the first guy, his friend seems completely unfazed, i'm like, ....?? the guy from the shower continues to get dressed, we all have a final laugh about hair, exchange names & say goodbye, they wish me a good workout, i walk back upstairs and feel like, well the gym has provided me sufficient entertainment today.

Then you peeked into the Pitchfork thread.

hahaha good stuff

i have the day off (veteran's day) so i had time to sauna and shower after the workout this morning. the sauna was full and there was good energy in there. nothing really "happened", no one said anything, and i didn't really "see" anything but my boner sense was tingling and i could tell we were all appreciating the hotness. i had my usual corner and saw a muscular younger man take off his clothes at his locker. in the shower, more showing off and stroking, and this time a hand beckoned under the stall so i put myself through for some fondling but pretty soon felt a finger jam up my ass too hard and was like too much dude so i rinsed off and left the shower. the same muscular young man i saw getting naked walked up next to me at the locker - he must have showered at the same time i did - i don't think he was the guy next to me but ?. i was like "let me slide my shit over so you can get into your locker" and he said "you're totally fine" very calmly and gently. i didn't say anything else - shy - but we shared this surprisingly serene moment being naked next to each other.

I'm at a B&N sitting beside a not well guy flipping through magazines going, "Beef Wellington. BEEF WELLINGTON, GUYS!"

That's all I got.

the sauna was full and there was good energy in there. nothing really "happened", no one said anything, and i didn't really "see" anything

a great thing about saunas is that even if nothing happens watching a man's body go from dry to glistening w/ perspiration to dripping sweat is inherently hot

honestly “wetlook” is certainly one of my kinks. wet bodies in or out of clothes really get me off

cosign

i blame Ryan Philippe’s ass

How many of y'all still had to shower after PE growing up?

Wait, people don’t have to shower after PE now?

How many of y'all still had wanted to shower after PE growing up?

my freshman year of high school i had PE first period and i remember having palpable anxiety over whether we would have to shower after and thus my gayness would be revealed but no that was not an option, they sent us to second period sweaty. and keep in mind we are talking about miami

Weirdly in the private Catholic high school I attended we had no anxiety about nudity. I remember no jokes and the coach who taught PE would've shut it down. Not that we were in showers long enough: we played, rinsed off, got dressed. I don't even remember checking out cock sizes.

My Canadian public high school in the 90s was basically the same. I had a weird, super-homophobic (former) friend who was pathologically afraid of male nudity who refused to shower after gym and, when pressed on it one time (not by me), actually showered in his boxers.

We had to shower after swimming, which we had to do in winter from 3rd-5th grade. But not in middle school (though there were showers, never used) or high school.

^^same (except swimming was middle school for us)