Real love -- I'm, like, searchin' for that Queer Love -- LGBTQIA+ Love // A Thread for the Real Ones

So! My Saturday night date sold me out. I suspected trouble when I had to text him 15 mins before meeting: he was running late thanks to a "minor emergency" at his parents', whatever that means (what's a "minor" emergency?). Luckily a friend kept me company at the bar.

An hour later, date texts: "On my way, send location address plz?" That's the last I heard of him. For a while I thought he died -- until I saw a an Instagram post Sunday morning.

He's 24, a former student who emailed me four years after class to ask about getting a beer or coffee. On determining he was queer he gushed: he praised my self-assurance, brains, looks, etc. We might've met that night had I not plans already. It's worth noting I barely remember this kid in summer 2018.

I wonder if simply not showing up is a phenomenon of the young?

Anusii are a cliche?

that sucks. definitely hit next. it's been a phenomenon of the young and old as long as i've been dating tbh. xp

Yeah, I wanted to avoid generational generalization, but a few viejos noted The Vanishing has been more prevalent in the last four years.

I've ghosted more than my share, I should note.

I have never done this, to my knowledge?

me eiths it's dumb
I'm too polite though

wassup homieslice

good morning!

Mornin' sunshine!
What's on the platter?

I'm vegetarian tonight.

sexually or culinarily?

Lady Bracknell : Well, both, if necessary, I presume!

So, I’m in one of the only two gay bars in Marbella (southern coast of Spain) right now, and the thing here is that high heeled shoes are passed around, everyone tries them on, and then they take their turn swishing down what passes for a catwalk. Pleased to report that my boy got the loudest applause of the night. We make our own entertainment.

The bar is filling up because at 4am they close the doors, bring out the ashtrays, and everyone can smoke indoors.

We will be back tomorrow for drag queen bingo.

omgggggg jealous

Oh I forgot to mention the seventy something naked woman who did her catwalk turn clutching a large stuffed teddy bear.

stop

jealz to the max

Just ended a fabulous evening with j0rdan.

yesss. what did y'all do?

we went to a sports bar so i could watch basketball while we talked about madonna

...and Mariah Carey. And my terrible non-date last week.

ok well that sounds ideal (sorry for the delay how the hell do three days go by?!)

you know i saw Madonna's Mme X tour
she could still put on a show, i just wonder if it isn't time for her to maybe think about doing something else

we had dinner with Stevie last night!! and then he came back to our place and we plied him with amaro and we talked about sheryl crow and natalie merchant and celine dion and it was just a total delight <3

Amaro! Sheryl Crow! Sounds like my kind of night.

sounds like a blast

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHxbxAQSQMM

uhhhhhh i had no idea wallace shawn was in a chaka khan video lol

he's in everything!
also I'm pretty sure I've had that night before lol so fun xp ❤️

wassup docs
it's eighty goddamn degrees here today
too soon yo

lovely haiku

it's only about 70 here. we've had some random bursts of heat over the past few weeks though.

next week i will be in seattle, where it's gonna be 50 and rainy no doubt. i forget, are any of y'all based there? would love recs on things and places to do/see/eat/drink there!

Wish I had more Recs than go to PONY and the gay Karaoke bar on Cap Hill, and also you simply must visit the main public library, it is everything a public library should be imho

85 degrees already

omg I've always wanted to go to Seattle

i used to love working in the library in college. I would sit in the stacks in the basement, or the art stacks which were the super cool ones. but I had no place there TBH

I miss my college library all the time.

The cops caught the arsonist of the queer bar in Bushwick. Scary story of what happened.

Not gonna lie, my queer friends, but I really am getting a lot more worried about some things, like whether my marriage will be recognized in a few years.

wait i didn't hear about the bar. deets? how did i miss that. was reading an article about a gay couple last night just filed a precedent setting suit RE being denied infertility coverage for IVF. glad for the action.

so just now i'm served an ad on facebook for customized wrestling singlets that's just an image of hairy pecs bulging out of spandex (the co is t4ked0wn sp0rtswe4r, in case you want to google it and have the ads follow you around everywhere). and i notice that it has likes and loves. so i click on the loves because i have a premonition. about ten gentlemen come up, and i open each in a new tab, and am beguiled by ten miniature portraits of gay american men.

wrestling fetishists have surprisingly good taste in memes

sorry busy week! how creepy! honestly the sanitary side of wrestling alone counteracts how hot it can be don't you think? u know how many skin infections those guys get? gross.

so I'm going to fire island in Aug and i have to figure out my look. last year was health goth. I'm kind of feeling club kid this year???

HI
wtf is up

hello gays

hiiii!

we spent nearly four hours trying to put up two bookshelves yesterday. stupid drywall!!

Got laid in New Orleans last week with a Napoleon House waiter.

i'm gay. not much else up tbh. hi kate!

Gay meter low thank christ for this thread

There is one (1) gay bar in town and it is a municipal landmark for being the first local gay watering hole

See? They don't need anymore!

wait hoos i thought you were in dc?

And yeah Alfo I guess it’s been twelve years since I hung with you in Miami— far too fucking long if you ask me

re: LA - that particular type of person is easy enough to avoid here imho. it helps that i'm not in the entertainment industry (or at most very tangential to it) and neither are most of my good friends

a city that i've been to a lot that i don't particularly like and have turned down job opportunities that wanted me to move there -- nashville

Fukkin truth bomb

There are a surprisingly high number of hot guys but it’s not worth the endless bachelorette parties

I love Hello Bored Biz Man

US city ILX gay fap!

What do you want...

...me to do today?

(xp)

On some healing news-- things remain "feeling slow" but are "progressing quickly". I'll be driving again, soon. Just today I received some docs in the mail I'd signed just a couple weeks ago. Seeing the difference in "my penmanship", like how much my right hand has recovered in the past two weeks, was shocking, shocking!! And yet the days pass by with such tedium and I'm still sleeping 10-11 hours out of 24, sheesh

great news

And yeah Alfo I guess it’s been twelve years since I hung with you in Miami— far too fucking long if you ask me

― brb (flamboyant goon tie included), Thursday, August 13, 2026

what a time!

I am glad we all agree that Boston sucks. Honestly it sucks so much that when people I know say they love it there, I think less of them!!

i feel that way when people say it about slc. "oh we aren't gonna vibe." "oh cool you are one of those people." there are the dyed in the wool mormon whites. but among gay or more liberal people they're either very embedded in family (who are often dyed in the wool mormon whites). which, i just don't relate to at all. or they moved here to get ahead. from california / texas / indiana or wherever. usually another conservative state or the conservative part of cali. often in some kind of health-related field. the health scam *ahem* industry is the biggest game in town here, behind mining oil and gas, with outdoor rec far down the list somewhere. houses are (or were) cheaper here. so it's a market move. these people tend to only care about making more money. there are a lot of them in this city. for a place with such a weird religious rep it's very materialist. the taste though is not for "expensive and finely made", it's for "expensive trash." slc wins when it comes to the amount of money you have to pay for access to abysmal culture and aesthetics.

what i love about.. nearly any other city i've been to is that there is a fair amount of people you see on the street who are obviously marching to the beat of their own drum, who never "grew up and bought a house in the suburbs". maybe they're poor, maybe they're doing well for themselves, but for whatever reason they are living a colorful life and being somewhat more true to their authentic selves. in slc the people you see walking downtown are either commuters working their finance job at jp morgan chase or houseless. often it's the houseless people who are actually displaying authenticity. a fair amount are obviously in pain but not all.