Real love -- I'm, like, searchin' for that Queer Love -- LGBTQIA+ Love // A Thread for the Real Ones

idk i don't like lists i'll stfu now

No Carl Bean and no Sylvester is just … very Rolling Stone

Macklemore…? That list is very Hitler

Our Calgary office had a Pride event yesterday and, in advance of it, one of the coordinators sent out a chart of pride flags which was maybe a little too comprehensive for the workplace? Like, I don’t think all your coworkers need to know that the patch on your backpack means you’re really into latex and rubber, but maybe that’s just me.

It’s just very funny to me that corporate D&I measures include ostentatiously celebrating kink in the workplace

Ooo the leather flag is very chic

Why does Philadelphia have its own rainbowflag design?

Also lol at one chart I saw on Etsy that just had a pink triangle and it’s labelled “triangle”. That’s me! I am triangle

lmao I endorse this, we are all triangle now

The Philadelphia flag was the precursor that led to the inclusive pride flag; I remember going “oh that’s nice” after it came out and then watching with unsurprised horror as a significant number of the white gay men in my Facebook feed bent over backwards mocking and decrying it, which IMO cemented the need for its existence

Yeah, I've been secretly enjoying just how much the newly added stripes draw out the toxicity in some of our ostensible peers

Ah I just read a primer. Seems the history of the Pride flag is too meaningful to just replace with leopard print. I still am triangle-identified tho, at least until they make an “I am furniture” flag

can we just show buggery on the Pride flag

Who are you, Joan Plowright?

https://i.imgur.com/3M7wYy1.gif

Hm, I think we can do better. 1. Huggy Bear “Pansy Twist”

Fun true fact: the third Mrs. Olivier is my second cousin. (She’s the one who put a stop to Larry’s buggerish weekends, allegedly)

And but yes to Pansy Twist, I always am listening to that song. One of the few 7”s I’ll never ever sell

my makeoutclub handle was pansytwist for a hot minute lol

Macklemore…? That list is very Hitler

Ah, that moment when, after a night of the hottest sex imaginable with the hottest guy imaginable, the likes of which you’ve not had in over a decade, you both have an out of the blue blip of sudden shyness and don’t exchange numbers. Stupid, because I know we were both up for a rematch. (Also, I was earworming the chorus of Call Me Maybe for most of yesterday, so it’s not as if the words were far from my lips.)

awwww

maybe I can find him for you

He goes out a lot in the Manchester village, and we’d met and flirted before, about six weeks ago. Then he turns up at the same place last night (Eagle), leather jacket open over bare chest (I feel I have to mention this), remembers everything we talked about before, super keen. I have Eagle weekends away every few weeks, so there is ample hope for a re-meet.

wow mike. a hot missed connection! i'm glad you shared the leather detail.

so all of a sudden a very handsome sicilian fella has supercharged our sex life. speaking of hottest sex imaginable. lots of fantasy checkboxes marked for me lately.

dang mike, hope you guys reconnect!

watch out for those fiery sicilians ;)

fucked up my back doing deadlifts yesterday, don't think any strenuous activity is in the cards for me anytime soon

ugh ouch dr, i'm sorry to hear that - hope it heals quickly.

and yes those fiery sicilians are ones to watch ;)

HE IS HERE! WE ARE MAKING OUT! I CANT EVEN!

He was looking for me as well. This is romcom territory.

🙌

Posted with his consent btw. He was amused.

lol, hi mike's sexy dude!

woof - from some rando on the other side of the world

love a happy ending (ahem)!!!

Turns out he’s a break dancer. I’ve seen videos. This keeps getting better.

any updates mike?

i'm pretty sure my bronchitis was chlamydia pneumoniae from the sex party

hi from my couch

Oh, I have updates. If Friday night was Pornhub and Saturday night was a romcom, then Sunday was a cross between Trainspotting and A Beautiful Mind. He invited me back to his place. It was a shithole. There were cameras. I think I was being set up to be filmed. That didn’t happen. I was told a load of crazy bullshit, which I was later able to disprove. He’s now blocked.

oh fuck, i'm so sorry. thought this was a fairytale unfolding before our eyes.

ugh mike that's awful, i'm sorry.

The full-length version of the story would have your jaws on the floor, but it's way too complex to summarise, and probably best not posted on the internet anyway. Jeez, I can pick 'em. Anyhow, I had two nights of super-hot fun before the plot twist, and the slow reveal that all was not what it seemed. They can't take that away from me!

super relatable mike... i feel bad about talking about some of the really fucked up shit i've seen and been through, even though at the same time i kind of feel like i need to. because it's like holy fuck did that actually happen? what the fuck did i do that they did and said _that_? so i guess all i'll say is that people who are fucked up like that, a lot of times it's hard to tell, they can mask pretty well. so it's not necessarily a reflection on you.

Thanks, Kate: a useful observation on the masking. People-reading is usually one of my stronger skills, so this all came right out of leftfield on the Sunday. He was super-chill until I arrived at his front door, but really stressed and agitated after that. He also told a lot of lies that I was able to disprove when I got home (internet sleuthing being another strong area), but I'm not sure that he had a sound grasp on his own reality, either. My "gonna block you" message was carefully worded so as not to send him into a bigger spiral.

as i'm aging, my libido waxes and wanes every week and a half or so. i like it, it feels healthy. it's a relief not to feel horny all the time tbh. sometimes it's nice just to be more in my head or my heart for a while. sometimes i feel like my sexual desire is lower priority than it is for some people my age or older. i don't mind it though. i've had fun, i'll still have fun. there's no rush. maybe it's an introvert thing too.

all that is prompted by a chat with farm banker, who i've managed to stay friendly with for a few months now. he's a sweet guy, very salt of the earth, not a dummy or anything, kind of intense, still very straight-laced with lots of hangups. it's funny that i was jealous of him at first. he's 40, only been out for 3 years, is really getting into the dating game looking for an ltr. anyway he likes to text and likes it to turn into sexting when he's horny, which is often. and oh my god, my desire to sext is at zero point zero zero zero. i'm 41, halfway through this life, the last thing on earth i want to do is try to feel sexual through my old-ass iphone i can barely read without glasses lmao. typing made up shit back and forth with someone i can't see. dude i was on irc doing that shit from 16 to 22 when meeting someone irl was out of the question. i'd literally rather watch paint dry at this moment in my life. my partner seems to enjoy it though, which is great - i'll let him do it with our mutual sex buds to keep the wheels turning, just as long as i don't have to sext. anyway, i like this guy and check in on him every once in a while, but he's just beginning his gay journey. i'm, like, being a little bit of a "gentle parent" with him. he'll probably disappoint me lol.

i hope my farm banker friend learns to love himself and makes good choices 🥹

do we have opinions about teeth whitening?

personally i find the appearance of blindingly white teeth in photographs to be distracting and kinda ugly tbqf

here's my deal - i was never much of a joiner in any kind of "gay scene". after i finally came out i had mainly straight friends then spent 7 years with a more reclusive guy than myself. i finally convinced myself i needed to make an effort and have gay friends around 36-37 and now at 41 after having made many, many attempts at it and landing maybe two really good friends, it feels like most gay guys are alien lifeforms i don't have any desire to be within 10 feet of. just throwing that out there because it's a chain posting scatterbrained monologue kind of saturday night for this madam, and i'm even 100 percent sober.

as i'm aging, my libido waxes and wanes every week and a half or so. i like it, it feels healthy. it's a relief not to feel horny all the time tbh.

this is happening to me too and **i fucking hate it!!!** these are the dog days of summer, every guy on the planet is walking around wearing next to nothing, it is *killing* me that i can't get it up 20x a day. i mean if not now when?? fuck!

i'm in my head *all the goddamn time*

omg, can you even imagine what it's like to be 40 and just starting to live as a gay man. i was a late bloomer too and so deeply ashamed of my inexperience when i started, it was crippling. made dating and hook ups sooo tough. and i was like 20!! i'm really glad he found you because you seem like you would be an amazing "gentle parent"! not to add to your burden of responsibility, as i'm sure you've given him so much already.

the gay boys i used to chill with, it was a giggle fest every time. i used to think, how come all my other friendships aren't just like this? this is what every hangout should be.

this is supposed to be my day to catch up on sleep, but my cousins came into the city to see me, i couldn't talk them out of it, was running around all day. i'm dead this week. never gonna make it.

i haven't done it in a while but i remember going on tinder dates or ok cupid or whatever with boys several years younger than me, they used to wanna call and talk for hours, like, every night for a week before meeting me in person.

fuckin' brats ♥️, with guys my age and older we'd just exchange like a 2 sentence email, "hey, how's tuesday?", end of.

i haven't done it in a while but i remember going on tinder dates or ok cupid or whatever with boys several years younger than me, they used to wanna call and talk for hours, like, every night for a week before meeting me in person.

lol otm

<3 deflatormouse

tell us about your cousins!