Words, usages, and phrases that annoy the shit out of you...

"you are a fucking amazing group of product managers, i just want to say that"

"You have the day you deserve".

not because it wasn't an effective 'fuck off' used against people who were abusive or awful people, but now it's once again been co-opted and seems to be used in situations that don't even remotely warrant such a level of aggression, like someone getting your order wrong at Wendy's or arguing whether someone was offside or not.

You know what I hate?

I hate "as [so-and-so] might put it" ...when the phrase that so-and-so "might" use is something the person wrote/said/sang ONCE (even if it was very famous).

My long-time annoyance at this was re-triggered by this sentence, in reference to the summer of 1974 in American politics: "It was, as Charles Dickens might put it, the best of times and the worst of times." Really? As though that weren't just a sentence in one of his books, but the dude's fucking catchphrase or something.

― jaymc, Thursday, June 30, 2011 4:48 PM (twelve years ago) bookmarkflaglink

OTM

What's funny about that Gopnik excerpt is that he's quoting himself. Like hey, this phrase I just came up with reminds me of Sergio Leone.

xps not otm imo!

you're just complaining about a careless use of the word "might" really?

As Jon Anderson might say, "yes"

fair

well, Adam Gopnick is a total hack

https://i.imgur.com/X9PsTeG.jpg

I've been getting inundated with cold-call sales emails and they all talk like this

why do you answer them?

oh oops, missed the "emails" part ... n/m

"lovely jubbly"

in correspondence from my mobile phone provider no less

"The blob"

I mean "the deep state" is a stupid expression but it least it sounds dramatic. "The blob" is the kind of Eton-level schoolboy joke phrase you could imagine a bunch of Tory tossers chortling about because they mistakenly think it's funny. In fact you don't have to imagine it, it's what they publicly do.

"Brits"

Fair enough if an American uses it but I've just heard a Sky reporter use it. It would be a bit like if a US reporter referred to Americans as Yanks in a serious news report.

I think that battle is lost. There's a new generation that doesn't think it makes us sound like cunts.

Rather that than Britishers

It would be funny if a Sky reporter said "Britishers" though. And "Englanders".

Whereas if they say Britishes, we know they lurk here.

I'd like to not read or hear "The British People" ever again.

What's wrong with Britons? No, don't answer that.

"I'm keeping a list of who is silent"

'that's my happy place'

Surely it’s been mentioned in this thread before, but I crawl within myself and die when I see “so I did a thing” on social media.

Poms is the correct way to refer to the brits fwiw

+1 on 'so I did a thing', major barf

I am fine with it depending on the thing… if it is related to the Carpenter movie I will generally lol

"the conversation around (x)"

"Do better"

English, ersatz English, Anglos, exbrits.
Disolvers of the holy bond that United the kingdom.

As the nation dissolves into smaller city states one will be known by the area one comes from. Bound to happen.
Or become more evolved and become Europeans again innit

"my guy"

social media posts that start "i don't know who needs to hear this but"

or sometimes "i don't know how many of y'all need to hear this", these type of people always call you "y'all" even if they come from fucking dunedin or somewhere

"Louder for the people in the back"

doo rag!!!!!

amazing to see you here

i agree completely btw

All of these are terrible but "do better" might be the worst. If someone says that you can be guaranteed they're a self-righteous asshole.

"y'all" seems to be everywhere.

It’s fucking abysmal, that, but I guess not everyone speaks a prestige dialect that has a native second person plural. 😎

Tell me about it

I keep seeing “having a moment”, eg:

”Belfast is having quite a moment, it really is,” says hotelier Melanie Harrison with an infectious laugh”

Is there an Irish equivalent? Best I can guess is "ye"??

"(x) is...... different"

maybe acceptable if you literally came up with it yourself as an offhand comment, but as a meme comment to repeat after any instance of remarkable ability or behaviour, welll..... DO BETTER

I think ‘x is….different’ is similar to the studied inarticulateness of “ Is x a thing now?”

"Because … thing"

^i don’t know the origin of this but it always seemed sub-Whedon to me, and that’s not a compliment to Joss Whedon at all

internet speak was basically sub-whedon for a couple of decades there

Yeah, the rot has been in place for a while

"studied inarticulateness" no doubt, but interestingly the terms for long-form journalistic writing already in use pre-thing are generally examples of a similar affect

i: an article (from 1700s; means "a thing")
ii: a piece (from 1500s; means "a bit of a thing")
iii: a feature (from 1850s; short for featured article, means "a thing we are publicly excited about")
iv: an essay (from 1500s; means "i tried to write a thing")

v: wedding announcement/new job: some personal news 😏

It's this thing