Words, usages, and phrases that annoy the shit out of you...

I think in British English one can say "good morning" in a way that means "goodbye, you are dismissed, and get out of my office and also fuck off and possibly die."

That is not an American usage. In the US we only use it as an initial greeting.

― ; Powell (Ye Mad Puffin), Monday, December 4, 2023 1:47 PM bookmarkflaglink

this was one of the central plot points of that Will Ferrell and Ryan Reynolds Christmas movie from last year iirc

I work in customer service.

So do I and you're completely misunderstanding my point. I don't hate if someone in customer service says it to me, I don't even notice it tbh, I hate when a "customer" says it to me.

A simple "Thanks" is all I need.

Also it sounds stupid when British people say it!

why don't you go ahead and have a nice day, now

but i had a nice day yesterday! variety is the spice of life!

You're due an absolute fucker of a day next Thursday

Cheers then!

Bless

i say cheers

full disclosure i say "stay well" to finish a lot of my human transactions tho

Lang may yer lum reek

May the thousand little gods bless you

Good luck in all your endeavors

Peace out

catch la later cum rag

https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/936/173/77e.jpg

https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/936/173/77e.jpg

lol

So many phrases, particularly at work, fall under the broad umbrella of phatic speech. 'Aight' 'morning' 'good weekend?' 'you're a star' 'don't be a cunt!' 'is that your piss on the bog seat?' - it's mostly just oil to keep the good vibe machine greased innit.

I might start ululating in a positive tone instead, see if anyone notices.

more workplaces need yodeling

i think we've talked about "at this time" before. i've now started using it with my cat i.e. "no treat services are being provided at this time."

We have decided to go in a different direction.

The bastard cousin of that British petit bourgeois phrase ‘as yet’.

'Heretofore'.

A word that instantly makes me think of "Murder Mystery" by the Velvet Underground.

I prefer the Cocteausian "hitherto" instead

"Best," has always somewhat puzzled and amused me - when I was a student, my Uni tutor from some weird exotic country (Canada) emailed me with it and I thought he had made a typo.
Like, best what? Wishes? Regards? George? I admire the fact that you didn't even need to decide or specify. Just BEST, whatevs

just say "besta é tu" and tell your boss it's an old Brazilian saying

LOL we actually say "stay fresh, cheese bags" all the time to each other in my house.

I'm going to start saying "stay frosty, frozen peas" because I don't think we have these cheese bags in America, but I like the concept

I've met a few cheezebags in America...

brain fart

^ so disgustingly gross

A coworker I've worked with for 13 years started saying "I appreciate you" this year. I know she's being nice but I find it weird. "I appreciate it" has worked fine for so long, why get schmaltzy...

"Best," has always somewhat puzzled and amused me - when I was a student, my Uni tutor from some weird exotic country (Canada) emailed me with it and I thought he had made a typo.
Like, best what? Wishes? Regards? George? I admire the fact that you didn't even need to decide or specify. Just BEST, whatevs

lol kinder i didn't realise I'd emailed you for work. Ftr I mean a slightly more businesslike and less greetings cardy version of 'best wishes', but death of the author and all that, other interpretations are available

and note to self, quoting is square brackets q, not b.

I abandoned my Spotify Wrapped a few slides in, the blurb was too painful.

est

brain fart

― grid yr lions (Pillbox), Tuesday, December 5, 2023 3:50 AM bookmarkflaglink

^ so disgustingly gross

― Humanitarian Pause (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, December 5, 2023 4:45 AM bookmarkflaglink

i knew someone who used to claim they had "poo brain", which irritated me slightly more than that

it’s short for “all the best”

Warmly,
Brimstead

My therapist uses "Warm regards." From him, it fits. I tried to use it once and the recipient made fun of me.

I used to just put "Regards" but someone told me I might just as well sign off with "Go fuck yourself" although tbf a lot of the time I probably did mean that. now on the extremely rare occasion I write an email I just put my name, or "Thanks" if it was responding to someone doing something for me

You can use any of the signoffs, they’re all fine — ppl are trying to trick you with the Emily post bullshit but everyone knows it can’t possibly matter

I like to end work emails with "love and kisses, Blue Pacific signing off"

lol I just used 'regards' in an email today, I didn't realize it sounds catty or cold

I almost always go with "Best regards" for business. "Sincerely" is OK, but somehow it carries the idea that I might not be sincere. I avoid "Very truly yours" like the plague.

i use "regards" or "cheers" most of the time but i'm thinking of switching my game up now i know how many different sign offs i can use to enrage people

Yr most hmble & obt Svt

smell ya later,

your very own mister please please himself,

lads ye presumably know what type of relationship ye have with each email recipient cmon

Yeah you gotta dial it in

Sometimes no sign off at all, it all depends