Posts you had second thought about and decided not to post - put them here

pastis ffs

pasties is grebt too

Pasties and a G-String

...I know, I know, it's serious

If I could live on Salmiak and beer, I would

You can imagine how disappointed I was the first time I bought two rolls of Certs and banged them together. No sparks.

― immodesty blaise (jimbeaux)

wait I'm pretty sure this is a thing you are supposed to do with mint Lifesavers in the dark?

wintergreen! https://www.thoughtco.com/why-wintergreen-lifesavers-spark-in-the-dark-602179

xp Yes, I remember that, but if you watch that old (1970) commercial I posted, the Certs rolls made a clacking or sparking sound when hit together. This was almost as big a letdown as Sea Monkeys.

or the glasses to see through girls' dresses

obviously you’re not a sublime fan

Why did I say pace there, it's clearly not what I meant. Stupid brain

I'm sure you'll get over it, wouldn't want to get unnecessarily dark now would we

I rarely have any doubts about whether or not I'm alive. The breathing is a good clue.

I recommend putting garlic in your salsa, avocado, and queso. It sharpens a rusty breath detector!

Also nearly 100% effective against vampires. I have been eating garlic for 50+ years and haven't encountered a single vampire (as far as I know).

I've always wondered about that belief. Does it have anything to do with garlic's properties as a blood thinner?

No idea.

My suspicion is that vampirism is associated with eastern and central Europe. Garlic is more associated with western and southern European cuisines.

So if you're a Transylvanian or Romanian vampire, you might find the cuisines of France, Spain, Greece, and Italy a bit offputting.

(I sincerely apologize to any vampires who are reading this. I try not to stereotype, but vampires are not historically very skilled at public relations.)

Someone once told me that if you rub garlic on your feet, you will be able to taste it before too long.

I've never actually tried to verify.

You are probably safe from vampires who also have a foot fetish. Just sayin.

Like I said, I do agree with Scott Adams that... like, I personally do live in a state of war.

i should probably clarify this bit lol

i've never been in nam or iraq or any shit like that and maybe i'm, like, diminishing people's actual experiences in actual wars by saying that. i don't know. has anyone here been in an actual war the way people usually think of it? well, if i'm an asshole for saying i feel like i'm in a war, i'm an asshole

with scott adams war is "kill or be killed", it's that old patton quote where "war isn't about dying for your country, it's about making the other poor bastard die for his", and i guess i'm the other poor bastard. i think that patton quote is bullshit, the way generals look at it. to me war is about one thing and one thing only - not dying. i feel like it's a war because there are a lot of people in power who very clearly want those of us who fly the good ol' pink white and blue dead and and are putting that power to use in organized ways

it feels like a war because you never see the one that has your name on it. it feels like war because any of us could go at any time for no reason at all. it feels like war because there's some nebulous idea of "normal life" out there but i don't know where it is or what i'd do if we got there. it feels like war because i have no idea what's going to happen, good or bad. it feels like war because we could _lose_, and i'm very aware of it, and very aware of the possible thing that could to us if we did, and i try not to think about it. it feels like war because i try to make some meaning in my life besides survival but it feels like a ridiculous charade. it feels like war because the idea of being a "civilian" is ridiculous and absurd. it doesn't matter that i don't carry a gun and don't actually want to kill anybody. i'm one of _them_.

so yeah i do feel like i'm living in the middle of a war. it's not one i want. it's one i hope ends soon. i'm not the one fighting it, though, so it's not up to me. all i'm trying to do is continue to exist in the face of people who are very very upset, like scott adams-level upset, about my existing.

One thing that's a bummer is when you try to meet up with a message board pal who's in town for a festival, but he doesn't reply to your texts. :(

RIP Charlie Chuck

Not seeing this anywhere

Ok, I see this is not the RIP thread. As u were ..

this is genuinely one of the worst posts in ilx history

braggart

tbf imago does have expertise here ;)

D:

just teasing sweetie

D: reamed

i'm not supposed to ask or care about such things, but i do wonder, because i love it so much when people do turn out to be queer. it's none of my business, but it's a good thing, something i want to celebrate. and people don't necessarily feel that way about themselves.

this session of heuristicaholics anonymous is very spry. "hi i'm hunt3r, and you JUST KNOW that..."

I didn’t know Madison Bumgarner posted here

While the eggs are frying, prepare an ice bath: fill a bowl full of cold water, with 1 cup of ice cubes. This ice bath will stop the eggs from cooking when you remove them from the pan. When the timer goes off, kill the heat and immediately move the fried eggs from the pan with a spatula to the ice bath.

that's not how my friends do it. when they remove the eggs they ice the area the eggs were removed _from_.

Iced fried eggs?

i often don't feel comfortable posting here these days, not for one particular reason. i can barely explain it. i just know that i used to write things and not worry about it so much, and i miss that

Post pictures instead!

ha! i have been, for real! but sometimes i feel pictured out

i am so tired of arguing to have my voice heard. i don't blame you for being apprehensive.

'shutting up' would do

(very much not to LL, to whom much love!)

Post more please z_tbd

COME BACK

I think if you stop posting the baseball board will tip to just over 50% Giants fans and I really can't have that happening

Yeah, LL's posts are top shelf.

La Lechera is an ilx treasure, all sensible people agree on this.

yes agreed, don’t leave LL.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PwrVePMx6t0

LL's an all-timer and a great person! i haven't been following threads as closely as usual recently so i'm not sure what's going on, but listening to LL is a reliably good move.

Very much appreciate LL!!