Words, usages, and phrases that annoy the shit out of you...

I couldn't imagine using "perfect" non-sarcastically. "Someone tore open a package of diapers and changed their baby in the store aisle." "Perfect."

I searched my WhatsApp chats for “yeah perfect” and had to stop scrolling after thirty instances.

I find myself overusing "very well" in the same way that some people use "perfect."

Another option is "good choice."

Whenever I am interacting with musicians doing covers (which may be a bit too often), I find myself saying "that's a good choice for you." Which may be bad instead of good.

My wife has admonished me about saying things like "I am glad you're having fun" or "I am glad you're interested in these things" to our daughter, when the topic is k-pop or v-tubers or whatever. I am working on figuring out the right response.

Lol puffin. Hope you figure that one out with your daughter

All "mate" haters please identify yourself so you can be appropriately killfiled.

The amount of joy I get returning from travelling and being able to put "mate", "cheers", "gday", "howzitgoan" etc. back into my vocabulary/being able to lean back into my accent, is immeasurable

xp to my kids i often use "i'm glad you're..." but sometimes i resort to "that sounds fun!" my worst dad style is probably *looking slightly grave or disappointed* "hey, doing x is erm, well, that's a bad model." lol.

my fave annoyance (which cracked me up) was in early 10's when i was doing verbal text messages, and thus saying the words "comma" or "period" into them, and my young teen kids would spontaneously walk around mocking me by interjecting "COMMA" or ending sentences with "PERIOD," while giving me a hard time.

my son calls me mate when i call him to find out where he is, absolutely infuriating

"alright mate?"

my young teen kids would spontaneously walk around mocking me by interjecting "COMMA" or ending sentences with "PERIOD," while giving me a hard time.

lol roasted

Feel like “mate” is like calling an adult “buddy” or “pal”, something you use deliberately to be irritating. “Oh mate” is a classic of this genre IMO

better 'mate' than 'bossman'

or is it tho

not imo

yes absolutely deliberate

I am working on figuring out the right response.

"Why do you watch that garbage"

Oh mate

I found myself walking a little way behind a youngish man who was on the phone to some friend of his and like 99% of what he said was like, “yes king, I hear you boss, don’t worry about it king” I thought it was incredible

"bruh! it's calm king. yes king. i'll firm it."

It wasn’t quite like that, it was more the laddish endearments. It was sweet!

i'm just riffing

it's amazing how much can be conveyed with like 8 words repeated in different configurations

I found myself walking a little way behind a youngish man who was on the phone to some friend of his and like 99% of what he said was like, “yes king, I hear you boss, don’t worry about it king” I thought it was incredible

lmao

A kid answering their mobile to a parent and saying ‘awright, mate!’ is only trying to style out the embarrassment of a checking-in call in front of their… mates.

Hunt3r’s kids FTW, LOL

I find it infuriating when my kids call me "bruh" - wrong family member! try again!

i used to work in a cafe that travelled around festivals every summer and one day we decided to call every customer or manager "chief" - nice balance of potential respect and disrespect there.

"Wee man" or "big yin", depending on height ftw.

Classic = saying a close friend/family members name too often in close succession. Good way to keep em on their toes, don't let em get too familiar ya know?

A friend of mine and I once tried to see how many of these we could string in a row.

"How's it going, buddy?"

"Not bad, chief. You?"

"Could be worse, boss."

etc.

It became ridiculous very quickly.

True story: I once left my glasses on the subway. A friendly stranger wished to alert me to this fact.

For context, at the time I was a reasonably tall and thin person (six feet tall weighing something like 120 pounds).

Anyway, our good Samaritan was trying to get my attention. He must have started with something like "hey man" or "hey, dude," and I didn't respond. As I was starting up the escalator and he shouted "YO! STICK!"

I turned and retrieved the glasses before the subway doors closed and life moved on. Wherever you are, kind stranger, thank you.

"thanks hoss"

Hunt3r’s kids FTW, LOL

thx-- and yeah, just ask them.

tbh even reading my own description it becomes in my head like a calvin and hobbes with the dad standing there with his eyes closed while c+t march in random directions about fists raised barking COMMA! PERIOD! because that really is about right.

c+h obv

everything listed since i last read this thread is fine and actually good

That but make it a sticky post at the top of the thread pls mods

a lot of internet video ads are using the term "POV:" in the wrong way, like half the ads now are "POV: you are craving chicken" with a video of a guy really enjoying a chicken wing

yeah, that apparently got ruined by tiktok a while ago

I like "mate"

But I can't stand "no worries", it fills me with hate lava

i change it to "no worry," totally different. so there. mate.

I say "be not concerned"

fret not!

Alternative alternatives to polite utterances:

Herewith, fail not at your peril

Do the needful

May the odds be ever in your favor

Thank the thousand little gods

Go with Beelzebub

Take it light, homes

be not afraid

“My problem”

“No pleasure”

My adoration for Aussies is tried when it’s abbreviated to “Naurries”, awful

Sounds like a diaper van. A nappy lorry. Naurries!

I'm actually saying "no. Worries!"

Pretty sure James Redd prefers "Dinnae fash yersel".

"The Lord is my shepherd
I shit my pants"

lol Camaraderie

“Multiple different ____”
“Various different ____”

wrong thread as it doesn't annoy me, but after listening to a number of podcasts I feel vaguely unsettled by the way Americans use the world "several"

May the Lord make his face to shine upon you.

no wokkas mate

the only time i get called "boss" is when they're trying to convince me i need a new air filter when i'm getting an oil change.