Elon Musk

another masterful gambit!

i would call bs on that one but its always real no one has to make anything up

There's eight cameras on a Tesla, lets see footage of the wreck

surprised tesla hasnt already paid him to take this one down

Another car came to close, autopilot swerved so missed the other car and flipped over a few times, slid across the motor way on the roof and flipped back onto the tires. All a bit of a blur for me but I'm told it was a sight to be seen from the outside 👌🏻

— Simon Pollock (née Tesla Light Shows) (@Teslalightshows) May 30, 2024

All that tweet makes me think of is this classic

18. One day, driving us to our great-aunt's house, Chris took a wrong turn onto a one-way street. He averted there oncoming cars and narrowly avoided a collision with a parked one before finally making it down the block and turning the correct way. There was about a minute of silence, while my mother and I could finally breathe again (my brother, who was less than a year old, was also in the car).
Suddenly, Chris beamed. "Man!" he said. "I must be the best fucking driver in the world! Anyone else would have gotten into in accident, but I avoided all those cars [that were headed straight at me because I was stupid enough to make a wrong turn on a fucking one-way residential street], and none of us got hurt." He concluded cockily: "I'm a great fucking driver."

― M Matos (M Matos), Tuesday, May 6, 2003 4:06 PM bookmarkflaglink

notice regarding 'cancellation of the dearMoon project: https://dearmoon.earth/pdf/dearMoon_EN_240601.pdf?0531

poor old steve aoki

I have been left with a life-changing experience, that much is true. But not the one I hoped for. Now, the change I have experienced is that I don’t trust as freely and easily, and I certainly don’t believe that moon trips happen to people like me. Not today anyway.

— Rhiannon Adam (@blackbirdsfly) June 1, 2024

Ruh roh...

Elon Musk accused of selling $7.5 billion of Tesla stock before releasing disappointing sales data that plunged the share price to two-year low

Elon Musk faces allegations that he illegally sold $7.5 billion worth of equity in Tesla in the fourth quarter of 2022, knowing that the business would disappoint after promising investors an “epic end of year.”

In a lawsuit filed with a Delaware court late last week, shareholder Michael Perry accused both the CEO of deliberately unloading nearly 45 million shares in advance of poor vehicle sales data to prevent an estimated 55% hit in value, and almost the entire board of collectively violating their responsibility of directors toward shareholders.

“By disposing of $7,530,113,926 worth of Tesla stock in November and December 2022 while he was in possession of adverse, material non-public information, E. Musk exploited his position at Tesla, and he breached his fiduciary duties to Tesla,” the lawsuit claims, adding other directors were both “knowing and culpable” as well.

https://fortune.com/2024/06/03/elon-musk-tesla-insider-trading-lawsuit-board-directors/

Elon's response: poop emoji

also decided to unilaterally call nvidia and tell them to prioritize his xAI/X order over Tesla’s order, when the former is a privately-held flight of fancy and the former could, in theory, in some way help the publicly-held business

how long until he tries to swing a purchase of X/xAI by Tesla, SolarCity-style?

decided to unilaterally call nvidia and tell them to prioritize his xAI/X order over Tesla’s order

― ɥɯ ︵ (°□°) (mh), Tuesday, June 4, 2024 4:10 PM (two minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

seems like fireable, litigatable offense

or at least one that doesn't deserve a $56 billion bonus

That teslamommy Twitter account seems to have been organising Tesla stock owners to vote for the package, trying to reverse the usual trend that retail investors never vote.

luv 2 relax in my stainless steel claustrophobia generator

If you ever get kicked out of the house by your significant other for buying the Cybertruck, you know where you can still sleep in style pic.twitter.com/bAPBa2rpsT

— Teslaconomics (@Teslaconomics) February 2, 2024

I would not trust that thing to allow me back out of the trunk once I had crawled in.

they've lost the mommybloggers https://www.threads.net/@i_am_random_sarah/post/C8IsAQ2yeS7

You hate to see it

https://www.nbclosangeles.com/news/local/tesla-autopilot-crashes-police-patrol-car-fullerton/3436547/

Teslas are cool now

tesla autopilot is praxis

tend not to look at tesla truck content cos frankly the whole thing is completely embarrassing but it is objectively hilarious looking at this guy having to make it go by *pulling a piece of string*.

lmao this fuckin piece of shit costs $100k and is less than 6 months old

the "fix" for when it breaks is to peel back a plastic panel and pull a string to break it in a different way pic.twitter.com/eULv6SHIQM

— 𝕏eͤ✞ꌚe͎n̆̈♨𝕏⊍תּḋᥑy҉҉ (@JetsenSunday) June 14, 2024

NEW:

Elon Musk’s Neuralink has been sued by a staffer who says she got scratched on the face by a herpes-carrying monkey-- then was fired a day after she said she was pregnant. https://t.co/cIRPv2q2Nh

— Gabe Hoffman (@GabeHoff) June 15, 2024

The headlines are just going to be Mad Libs from here on in...

He got his $56b tho

this shit is wild, nasa boss who approved this boondoggle works at spacex now

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxG0WAwwrGk

lol

https://www.bnnbloomberg.ca/polopoly_fs/1.2078062.1716912319!/fileimage/httpImage/image.png_gen/derivatives/landscape_620/image.png

yikes

seems like word of mouth works both ways. now show us tesla's drop in sales just in China.

there it is

🚨 BREAKING WSJ:

SEC likely to seek enforcement action barring Elon Musk as public company officer / director, former SEC officials say

Musk deliberately violated securities laws requiring 13-D filing when he crossed 5% ownership of Twitter stock, disclosed 11 days late at 9% pic.twitter.com/GrYqLanHO1

— Gabe Hoffman (@GabeHoff) June 17, 2024

wow

does he still get his $50b

it goes to me now

Coincidentally mark I was wondering if I could get $35 million from you

i also could use $35m if its not too much trouble

wow shows you who your fake friends are when they come clamoring for your paper when you make it, i (a real friend) on the other hand will settle for $100,000

I don't want a handout. I want a hand up.

speak for yourself, i would very much like a handout

upon reflection i actually need $50m thanks in advance

$35 mil works for me thanks ahead of time, will also take the $34.9 bise is leaving on the table if that makes things a little easier on everyone ta ta

https://www.theonion.com/americas-homeless-want-a-hand-up-not-a-handout-vs-i-w-1819594266

Elon Musk had a sexual relationship with a former SpaceX intern, who he later hired onto his executive team, according to The Wall Street Journal. He also had a sexual relationship with a second employee. And a third woman alleged that Musk asked her several times to have his children; she refused. He then denied her a raise and complained about her performance.

https://www.theverge.com/2024/6/12/24176705/spacex-elon-musk-gwynne-shotwell-sexual-relationships

Just an absolute shitstain, on every level. Second only to Trump in the list of people I hope to never ever have to think about again.

all these are malicious and evil but the horse story really puts a pin in how pathetic it all is

That is not what expected when I heard “the horse story”

I may have been intentionally vague there

https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:cfy5rgqvohpdqxgu2geb5u2b/bafkreidl3wskzlirb2ze553nq5oszzikrri3qur5hqdzblnxptc4cusygu@jpeg

https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:cfy5rgqvohpdqxgu2geb5u2b/bafkreig4ameitq7ozc6gv4hte5a5adu2gw25j3ilyku6romqjbexj6agzu@jpeg

old enough to remember the major scandal when a tiny percentage of toyotas might have been defective

Old enough to remember when it was Audis before that.

??? pic.twitter.com/MjAay9kgFz

— Ken Klippenstein (@kenklippenstein) June 26, 2024

Personally intervening to give an update on restoring the account of someone who was banned for posting a picture of a child being horribly abused is definitely a choice

and its not even the first time