Defend the Indefensible: "Reality Bites"

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The self-appointed film for Gen Xers, starring Ethan Hawke as an asshole who plays in a shitty band, with Winona Ryder as a wannabe filmmaker whose home videos are supposed to be profound because they feature Ethan Hawke as an asshole saying allegedly poetic things. It's a really deep love story too, with Winona being wooed by nice-guy Ben Stiller, whom she dumps because he wears a suit and doesn't wear dirty white t-shirts and probably wouldn't eventually hit her whilst drunk, unlike asshole musician Ethan Hawke, whom she runs back to because his father dies and she feels sorry for him. Features Janeane Garofalo as a slut and Steve Zahn as a one dimensional gay dude. Cameos by Dave Pirner and Evan Dando! A soundtrack one could find in every other dorm room circa '95-'99!

defend!

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:33 (twenty-one years ago)

The self-appointed film for Gen Xers

All that needed to be said, really.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Winona Ryder

― ModJ (ModJ), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:37 (twenty-one years ago)

ah fuck this. The movie has PLENTY of great lines, way more than the average pretentious "this is my generation" movie.

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Garofalo in particular throws out some winners. PLUS the movie implies that Winona Ryder is the spawn of Joe Don Baker and Swoosie Kurtz!

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:40 (twenty-one years ago)

anyone who thinks this movie is INDEFENSIBLE should be forced to watch "S.F.W." Twice.

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:41 (twenty-one years ago)

That's not even the worst Stephen Dorff movie!

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:45 (twenty-one years ago)

If S.F.W. is worse than Reality Bites, which I consider the worst movie on the face of the planet, then count me out.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:45 (twenty-one years ago)

I demand you sit through Cold Creek Manor thrice.

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:46 (twenty-one years ago)

I got into a fight with my (not yet, at the time) ex because she was all moony over Ethan Hawke's character, and I spent the next two years breaking up with her.

― Tep (ktepi), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:47 (twenty-one years ago)

I would have suggested that the best resolution to the movie would have been someone picking up Ethan Hawke's character by the ankles and swinging him toward's Ben Stiller's character, killing them both, but he was so filthy that whoever did it would have ended up in the hospital, or Hawke's character would have just slid through someone's grasp from all of the grease or slime.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:50 (twenty-one years ago)

What I learned from Reality Bites:

step 1 - never shower
step 2 - grow a goatee
step 3 - play Violent Femmes cover songs in a vaguely threatening fashion to girls who won't sleep with me
step 4 - wait for close relative to die
step 5 - finally get with with easily impressed Winona Ryder

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:52 (twenty-one years ago)

What I learned from Reality Bites:

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:52 (twenty-one years ago)

this film made LISA LOEB famous!!

― the surface noise (electricsound), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:54 (twenty-one years ago)

don't mistake my sentiments about this movie as a rave. Merely a head-check about how low these types of movies can sink.

Sean, see S.F.W. for pain. Pain, pain, pain.

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:55 (twenty-one years ago)

I forgot it had Joe Don Baker! Too bad that it couldn't also have been mst3k-ied.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:55 (twenty-one years ago)

It's almost self-MSTing, surely.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:56 (twenty-one years ago)

I like Ethan Hawke. But I have not seen Reality Bites. Somehow I missed it and I never got round to wanting to see it. And all this thread's done is make me really want to see it! Ha.

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 00:58 (twenty-one years ago)

There's no point to any of this. It's all just a... a random lottery of meaningless tragedy and a series of near escapes. So I take pleasure in the details. You know... a quarter-pounder with cheese, those are good, the sky about ten minutes before it starts to rain, the moment where your laughter become a cackle... and I, I sit back and I smoke my Camel Straights and I ride my own melt.

― Troy Dyer (Anthony Miccio), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:02 (twenty-one years ago)

I like how half of his pleasures in life are product placements

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:04 (twenty-one years ago)

"ride my own melt"

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:04 (twenty-one years ago)

This Gear is cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs

― Troy Dyer (Anthony Miccio), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Ben Stiller really needed to have his head caved in by a crowbar midway through that movie for all of his supposed generation-defining inanities. I've held a grudge against him ever since that came out.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:06 (twenty-one years ago)

reality bites is another reason why all white people must be killed, immediately

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:06 (twenty-one years ago)

o why can't i get just one screw

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:07 (twenty-one years ago)

OK. Have any of the people ripping on this movie seen S.F.W.? Show of hands.

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:07 (twenty-one years ago)

this is gonna be like when professor frink asked if anyone had seen tron

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:07 (twenty-one years ago)

It might be the movie that made me hate him, because I remember watching the Ben Stiller Show. I've never watched Dead Poets Society the same way since, either, cause when Ethan Hawke shows up being all blinky and timid, I just think, "Yeah, you know, maybe the whole 'teachers feel feelings' thing doesn't work and Robin Williams SHOULD be fired, because you grow up to be a fuck."

― Tep (ktepi), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:08 (twenty-one years ago)

I haven't, Anthony, but you're not making me want to. Besides, I've seen New Rose Hotel, which is worse; that doesn't make Reality Bites any better.

― Tep (ktepi), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:09 (twenty-one years ago)

OK. Have any of the people ripping on this movie seen S.F.W.? Show of hands.

"Guys? Guys? If you think this shit on a platter smells bad, you obviously haven't left it out in in your living room for a few days!"

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:10 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm just saying that after S.F.W. this film seems completely benign. If overambitious and absurd.

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:12 (twenty-one years ago)

"hey you think dogshit tastes bad, try eating this panhandler's corpse"

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:12 (twenty-one years ago)

ohhh new rose hotel omg omg

― g--ff (gcannon), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:14 (twenty-one years ago)

these metaphors should stick within the world of prepared meals (which are what films are). It's more like "you think Ethan Hawke's overbaked pizza is bad, check out Stephen Dorff's sometime."

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:15 (twenty-one years ago)

What the hell is SFW? I kept reading this as "SWF" as in "Single White Female" which is inarguably worse than Reality Bites.

― anthony kyle monday (akmonday), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:16 (twenty-one years ago)

ohhh new rose hotel omg omg

Man, I'm sorry, I was hoping that was a private pain.

― Tep (ktepi), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Anthony, Anthony, there is no way that the sheer awfulness of Reality Bites can even come close to being compared with food, but if you really must, and to keep in the same mode as the movie itself, watching Reality Bites is like drinking a Big Gulp container filled with warm piss. Maybe for SFW the pisser ate asparagus the night before, but I still don't want to drink the piss.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:17 (twenty-one years ago)

YER ALL INNOCENT CHILDREN WITH NO CLUE OF WHAT HORRORS AWAIT THEE IN THE VIDEO STORE! NO CLUE WHATSOEVER!

peace out.

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Just to toss in a couple of things for a non-existent Defend the Indefensible: New Rose Hotel thread...

- a decent ability to suggest a futuristic industrial landscape via only a few murky city shots
- Asia Argento topless

that's all I got, really.

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:21 (twenty-one years ago)

i can get topless asia argento on the internet tho. for free.

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:22 (twenty-one years ago)

in fact, i think i will right now.

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:22 (twenty-one years ago)

See, and that suggests the future, too! We don't need you, New Rose Hotel!

― Tep (ktepi), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:24 (twenty-one years ago)

No one's saying there are not worse films than Reality Bites of course, just that none of the worse films feature Ethan Hawke as a musician asshole with a goatee.

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:24 (twenty-one years ago)

except gattica

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:25 (twenty-one years ago)

no goatee there.

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Ethan Hawke as asshole identity assuming janitor

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:25 (twenty-one years ago)

checking it on allmovie i'm surprised at how late NRH came out. 99!

― g--ff (gcannon), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:26 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm trying to think of movies that would be improved by EHAAMAWAG, and they're all dinosaur movies, and they all involve the dinosaurs eating/stomping on/crapping on EHAAMAWAG.

― Tep (ktepi), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:26 (twenty-one years ago)

hopefully EHAAMAWAG would be the noise he made

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:27 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm actually picturing the dinosaurs from Land Before Time 4, 5, 6, whatever (or We're Back) doing this, and am kind of happy about it.

― Tep (ktepi), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 01:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Skipping 289 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lclv97I2la1qb7evco1_500.gif

― christmas candy bar (al leong), Wednesday, 19 February 2014 22:09 (eleven years ago)

al leong you are making my day with these gifs

― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 19 February 2014 22:15 (eleven years ago)

http://showrenity.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/tumblr_m8o46h5bSj1qdoy3ao1_500.gif

― christmas candy bar (al leong), Wednesday, 19 February 2014 22:22 (eleven years ago)

http://swamplot.com/how-is-houstons-reality-bites-neighborhood-doing-20-years-on/2014-02-18/

― Virginia, Plain and Tall (C. Grisso/McCain), Thursday, 20 February 2014 23:45 (eleven years ago)

http://jezebel.com/i-re-watched-reality-bites-and-its-basically-a-manual-1527955140/

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 21 February 2014 22:41 (eleven years ago)

everyone in this movie talks like the people in that ben stiller show dandruff shampoo sketch, but he actually made this movie and is proud of it, somehow

― AIDS (Hungry4Ass), Friday, 21 February 2014 22:54 (eleven years ago)

at least he didn't write it

― images of war violence and historical smoking (Dr Morbius), Friday, 21 February 2014 22:58 (eleven years ago)

This used to be my favourite film bitd, I blame being a late virgin. Awffffuullll.

― Slight damage to cover on top corner (chewed by a kitten) (Craigo Boingo), Saturday, 22 February 2014 00:49 (eleven years ago)

ahem this is a DEFEND the indefensible thread. go peddle your hate speech somewhere else, raggett
>:(

― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, 22 February 2014 01:26 (eleven years ago)

From the Peter Travers thread:

You may think Reality Bites is just a bunch of white kids sitting around whining. If so, what's your glitch? It's also pure entertainment.
― (The Other) J.D. (J.D.), Wednesday, February 6, 2013 12:48 AM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― Virginia, Plain and Tall (C. Grisso/McCain), Saturday, 22 February 2014 02:11 (eleven years ago)

Garofalo says in that article I posted that she never thought at the time it was a Gen X thing, cuz she's almost as old as I am.

― images of war violence and historical smoking (Dr Morbius), Saturday, 22 February 2014 02:26 (eleven years ago)

She's three years younger than Rollins., born after JFK. It's not like I want to claim her, but I think she's ours.

― pplains, Saturday, 22 February 2014 02:28 (eleven years ago)

two years pass...

Not sure how I would have felt about this when it came out--I was 32 at the time, so still not exactly its target audience. Today, I thought it was okay. Hawke is very good, even when the script isn't. Probably the most I've ever liked Winona Ryder. Garofalo, I'll take Larry Sanders. Stiller made me wince a few times. The music was surprisingly inconsequential.

― clemenza, Sunday, 29 May 2016 18:37 (nine years ago)

one year passes...

I wanna tell you I hate this movie. Every day.

― morning wood truancy (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 22 November 2017 03:33 (seven years ago)

It festers in its sewer.

― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 22 November 2017 03:55 (seven years ago)

ENBB to thread so that we may FITE these evil poo poo-ers

― Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 November 2017 04:01 (seven years ago)

Garofalo and Zahn much more appealing than putative stars

― ice cream social justice (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 22 November 2017 04:21 (seven years ago)

My opinion on this film tends to oscillate between mild approval and mild annoyance, depending on my mood, but it did inspire a terrific Siskel & Ebert review (not on YouTube at the moment, but available at this site, if you jump ahead 8 minutes into the video).

― iCloudius (cryptosicko), Wednesday, 22 November 2017 04:43 (seven years ago)

ilx acts like the content of this movie is some great affront to their own v serious 90’s aesthetic but the truth is Ethan Hawke was hot, the music was (mostly) great, Winona was cute, the end

buncha buzzkills

― Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 November 2017 04:57 (seven years ago)

Ethan Hawke has the most punchable face in the world most days and it really hit a peak in this.

― louise ck (milo z), Wednesday, 22 November 2017 05:00 (seven years ago)

see this ^ is the kind of attitude i’m talking about

― Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 November 2017 05:01 (seven years ago)

I was not old enough to have a serious '90s aesthetic, I just really can't stand Ethan Hawke's face even though I like some of his movies.

― louise ck (milo z), Wednesday, 22 November 2017 05:05 (seven years ago)

I remember making fun of this movie when I saw it in the theater. But it had Janeane Garofalo, who redeemed it. I think about it every time I fold sweaters.

― sarahell, Wednesday, 22 November 2017 05:06 (seven years ago)

lol otm re sweater folding

― Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 November 2017 05:41 (seven years ago)

Reality Bites vs. Singles, fite!

― nickn, Wednesday, 22 November 2017 07:00 (seven years ago)

y not both <3

― Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 November 2017 07:49 (seven years ago)

four months pass...

Bring on another raking over the coals!

https://longreads.com/2018/03/27/youve-reached-the-winter-of-our-discontent/

― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 27 March 2018 13:15 (seven years ago)

2300 words is a "long read?"

― Dangleballs and the Ballerina (cryptosicko), Tuesday, 27 March 2018 13:16 (seven years ago)

You millennials with your 280 characters and your etc

― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 27 March 2018 13:26 (seven years ago)

I just read this entire thread again. I like how someone mentions David Spade as being in the movie.

― Yerac, Tuesday, 27 March 2018 14:10 (seven years ago)

I obviously have always had problems with how bad Ethan Hawke looks while kissing on screen.

― Yerac, Tuesday, 27 March 2018 14:11 (seven years ago)

I obviously have always had problems with how bad Ethan Hawke looks ~~while kissing~~ on screen.

― morning wood truancy (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, 27 March 2018 14:14 (seven years ago)

Ha, I said he looks like he smells like a hairless cat on the Before Sunrise thread last week.

― Yerac, Tuesday, 27 March 2018 14:16 (seven years ago)

"you got time to lean, you got time to clean" - David Spade in Reality Bites may be my favorite thing he's ever done.

― Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 27 March 2018 19:49 (seven years ago)

lotta dudes roll up itt to continually complain/whine/disparage Ethan and methinks the lads doth protest too much

Ethan is dreamy the end

― Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 27 March 2018 19:51 (seven years ago)

So many problems with this movie but I still will watch it anytime it is on. I am only a tad bit embarrassed that I called Troy Dyer hot over a decade ago above.

― Yerac, Tuesday, 27 March 2018 19:53 (seven years ago)

Had a similar moment listening to the Spin Doctors in the car recently tbf

― well bissogled trotters (Michael B), Tuesday, 27 March 2018 19:58 (seven years ago)

one year passes...

Generation X was a terrible mistake.

― Greta Van Show Feets BB (milo z), Thursday, 28 March 2019 04:41 (six years ago)

saw thread, came here to post this, but of course it was already covered 15 years ago:

Winona Ryder

― ModJ (ModJ), Monday, April 5, 2004 8:37 PM

― flappy bird, Thursday, 28 March 2019 04:58 (six years ago)

five years pass...

I guess the owners didn't want any sweet Gen X Airbnb bux

https://www.houstonchronicle.com/news/houston-texas/trending/article/reality-bites-home-houston-demolition-permit-19385708.php

A demolition permit was taken out on the Houston fourplex at 409 W. Clay Street in the Montrose neighborhood, the city’s permitting center confirmed.
Each unit of the property has one bedroom, one bathroom, a living and dining room plus hardwood floors, according to Apartments.com.
A YouTube video of a walkthrough of the building on Thursday, showed the home in disarray with trash and debris scattered in multiple rooms, doors off their hinges, displaced furniture and even a cat tower left behind from the previous occupants. It's unclear when the residence will be demolished.

― an icon of a worried-looking, long-haired, bespectacled man (C. Grisso/McCain), Saturday, 6 April 2024 01:00 (one year ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5qp9riQGrRI

― an icon of a worried-looking, long-haired, bespectacled man (C. Grisso/McCain), Saturday, 6 April 2024 01:12 (one year ago)

Would watch a split screen shot by shot reshoot of slacker then and now

― calstars, Saturday, 6 April 2024 02:10 (one year ago)

There was a multi-director Slacker remake in 2011, and IIRC, they tried to match the locations.

A good chunk of the movie:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9aRmEhJZhjI

― an icon of a worried-looking, long-haired, bespectacled man (C. Grisso/McCain), Saturday, 6 April 2024 03:16 (one year ago)

Thanks for that

― calstars, Saturday, 6 April 2024 13:43 (one year ago)

True story (or so I've been told): Winona Ryder's character, Lelaina, was named after the future wife of a former ILX'or.

― clemenza, Saturday, 6 April 2024 17:53 (one year ago)

...and it's gone: https://www.reddit.com/r/houston/s/lqRzzW3MEB

― an icon of a worried-looking, long-haired, bespectacled man (C. Grisso/McCain), Tuesday, 9 April 2024 23:15 (one year ago)

Our long national nightmare is over.

― birdistheword, Wednesday, 10 April 2024 00:28 (one year ago)

It's totally Ethan Hawke's fault.

― an icon of a worried-looking, long-haired, bespectacled man (C. Grisso/McCain), Wednesday, 10 April 2024 00:32 (one year ago)

I'd rather blame Stiller.

― birdistheword, Wednesday, 10 April 2024 00:37 (one year ago)

For the movie that is.

― birdistheword, Wednesday, 10 April 2024 00:37 (one year ago)

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