You're my present this year: celebrating the Folger's incest commercial

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yOQk_pWmisA

http://www.deathandtaxesmag.com/191372/that-creepy-folgers-holidays-commercial-that-implies-incest-is-back/

http://gawker.com/5961772/kick-off-the-christmas-season-with-thousands-of-words-of-incest-fanfic-about-the-weirdest-folgers-commercial-of-all-time

http://www.dailydot.com/society/folgers-incest-holiday-commercial-family/

http://www.abovetopsecret.com/forum/thread641305/pg1

http://archiveofourown.org/tags/Folgers%20%22Home%20for%20the%20Holidays%22%20Commercial/works

http://folgersincest.tumblr.com/

I find this overeager "ain't it creepy? check it out, I found some creepy, let's all agree this is creepy" read on so much stuff kinda depressing tbh

it's.....not really creepy at all?

i celebrate this commercial

This isn't creepy. Cheesy, but not creepy.

It seems a little intense to me but I'm an only child so I never really learned how to love.

What's truly deplorable is that these people are 1) under 70 and 2) not hosting an AA meeting and yet buy those giant tubs of gross Folger's coffee.

I'm an only child too - maybe that's why it feels cheesy to me.

I find this overeager "ain't it creepy? check it out, I found some creepy, let's all agree this is creepy" read on so much stuff kinda depressing tbh

― The Complainte of Ray Tabano, Wednesday, December 24, 2014 2:47 PM (31 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yup

creepy internet ppl tend to be the eagerest ones to declare something creepy, for some reason

"This sister loves her brother *a little too much* if you know what I mean, kinda weird and gross" (under breath to self, alone in darkened house, dipping orange-powder-covered fingers back into snack bowl)

I don't find it creepy, but I feel like the commercial-makers were conscious of possible ambiguity, hence opening the dialogue in such a way that she can explicitly identify herself as his sister.

I must have the wrong house.

xp i think that's right, but it's only ambiguous in the way that many poorly-written, -shot, -acted, and -edited 30-second ads might be ambiguous.

also the dumb part is that there's no reason they couldn't have cast a much younger actress as the sister which would have solved the whole thing.

that's what the original was like:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I4kNl7cQdcU

I'll be honest, before the Mom & Dad reveal I thought it was the brother and sister in bed post-coitus which slightly tips the scale towards the creepy incest angle in my opinion.

(also dips orange-powder-covered fingers back into snack bowl briefly but awkwardly touching man alive's fingers in the process)

Man, budgets for ad music have apparently taken a hit. Full symphony orchestra in the original, a single guitarist in the later one.

xp i think that's right, but it's only ambiguous in the way that many poorly-written, -shot, -acted, and -edited 30-second ads might be ambiguous.

― call all destroyer, Wednesday, December 24, 2014 2:41 PM (44 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

also the dumb part is that there's no reason they couldn't have cast a much younger actress as the sister which would have solved the whole thing.

― call all destroyer, Wednesday, December 24, 2014 2:42 PM (43 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

It seems a little intense to me but I'm an only child so I never really learned how to love.

same

nah this is creepy

I find this overeager "ain't it creepy? check it out, I found some creepy, let's all agree this is creepy" read on so much stuff kinda depressing tbh

― The Complainte of Ray Tabano, Wednesday, December 24, 2014 2:47 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

no one had to "find" it they bring it out every year and it plays a million times a day

this wasn't creepy enough imo

this was not creepy, not gonna read trendpieces about how creepy it was

I don't really get it, I watched the ad expecting for the characters to cross the line in one way or another, but there was nothing there that wouldn't go beyond normal affection between siblings. Do the folks who think this is creepy feel that a brother and sister can't display their emotions except by punching each other or something?

Those canisters can come in handy in a variety of storage applications. I recommend drinking the hell out of Folgers.

Brother has a weird mouth.

HELLO, AGAIN WE PUNCH-MAS!

While all three have their unique pleasures, the clear masterpiece is the near-10,000 word "Home for the Holidays," by "portland_rain", an experienced author who's also written fan fiction about, among other things, the music video for the Killers' "Crossfire," the video game Oregon Trail, and NPR's humorous news quiz show Wait Wait Don't Tell Me.

Man, budgets for ad music have apparently taken a hit. Full symphony orchestra in the original, a single guitarist in the later one.

this and the death of good jingles is the sort of thing I can get kinda fields-round-here about

https://www.gq.com/story/folgers-incest-ad-oral-history

The ad was cast and filmed in Santa Monica, California in the summer of 2009. Timothy Simons, the actor best known for playing Jonah on Veep, was new to Los Angeles and worked the camera for the auditions and callbacks.

Timothy Simons (cameraman for auditions and callbacks): This was a very long time ago and if you asked me if I would end up being interviewed about this commercial that I worked on, 10 years later, I would not have believed you, because it was altogether pretty unremarkable. It’s not something I have a lot of memories about, outside of the fact that ultimately the commercial kind of seems like the brother and sister are going to have sex. That’s why we’re talking, right?

legendary quote

timothy simons otm

LOL, I am a professional acquaintance of Alexa Marinos, who is quoted in that article. She and I are both active in Cleveland's marketing community.

Ha, and I did improv with Glen Boozan (also quoted in the article) ages ago. Small damn world.

Jonad was the cameraman?

the sister is weyoun's daughter!

Tbh the truly insane thing about this commercial is not the incest, but the implication that the guy hasn’t been able to get “real coffee” in fucking WEST AFRICA

'real coffee' is code for sister-fucking iirc

See: the infamous GTA 'real coffee' mod

I have a policy against reading “oral histories” but I appreciate the Tim Simons pullquote, which is sublime.

I knew about the ad, I knew about the fic and I definitely wtfed at the real coffee line, but I just can’t get over them running it for three whole years.

The role of the brother went to Matthew Alan, who has since gone on to star in the series Castle Rock and 13 Reasons Why. Catherine Combs, who played the sister, declined to be interviewed for this article.

Why is this making me laugh so much

there's 13 reasons why

rassle cock morelike

I have a policy against reading “oral histories”

I'm not sure I want to click an incest-oral URL here at the office.

outside of the fact that ultimately the commercial kind of seems like the brother and sister are going to have sex. That’s why we’re talking, right?

This is more the result of bad directing and off-key acting than bad scripting. If the producer had cast a real brother and sister for this commercial no one would think they had the hots for each other. No one. Their whole chemistry would read differently to the camera.

Did anyone ever redo this with Jamie and Cersi Lannister?

Would be better with David and Amy Sedaris.

Or Angelina Jolie and James Haven

i have never seen this commercial before! I imagine this is how mormons behave.

This is more the result of bad directing and off-key acting than bad scripting. If the producer had cast a real brother and sister for this commercial no one would think they had the hots for each other. No one. Their whole chemistry would read differently to the camera.

those lingering close-ups in the last few seconds are something I've only seen used when the characters are about to start making out with each other

The best part of waking up
Is Folger's in your cup
Followed by boning your sister in the kitchen as your mom runs in to say hi

is more the result of bad directing and off-key acting than bad scripting.

those lingering close-ups in the last few seconds are something I've only seen used when the characters are about to start making out with each other

― frogbs, Monday, December 16, 2019 1:27 PM (three minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

Honestly, legitimately misread that as 'fingering close-ups'

I dunno the key creepiness misstep imo is her putting the bow on him, as if she wants to undress him.

This was weird. Him moving the bow down another 12 inches was weirder imo.

An incest subtext is all in the edit. Hold the wide shot, its innocuous; close ups in the reaction shots, it reads as prelude to romance.

I'm just so unpleasantly preoccupied by this commercial

'You're my present this year.'
(tenderly brushes his sister's cheek) 'And you're my future.'

Really all it would've taken to deflate the tension is for him to drop a quick 'pretty sneaky, sis!'

Jack Stratton: I love coffee. I am really into coffee and Brooklyn coffee culture. So in my story, I tackle the coffee question, because I don't personally like Folgers (or any coffee that isn't freshly roasted and ground right before making it.) My two goals were to play out the subtextual incestuous flirtation and get them drinking better coffee.

loooooooooooooool

This is a man who fucks coffee.

omg did you see this actual Folger's commercial that's embedded in the story

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNyXrqnq33I

Timothy Simons: Here’s one thing: I was in a Kentucky Fried Chicken commercial when I was in Chicago that was somehow interpreted as—and I don’t know what the best way to say this is—a celebration of men going down on women while they’re menstruating. It was called, like, “The Wingmaster Commercial.” So I feel like far too in-depth interpretations of commercials that I’ve been involved in have followed me around a little bit.

this is the best article I will read all day

omg did you see this actual Folger's commercial that's embedded in the story

"See? No more INCEST/incest, ok?"

idgi it *wingmaster* some kind of euphemism? Or are ppl really directly reading "barbecue sauce on around mouth" = "period blood"

feel like I'm missing something

it's the most wonderful time of the year
there'll be much mistletoeing
with your brother blowing
his load in your rear

lol I tried to find the original youtube and got confused when the parents started screaming at the brother:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fhfcWTZeP1k

it does have the OG commercial for the first half tho

gonna go out on a limb here and say people read dirty connotations into commercials because they're not fun to watch

lmao I just wanna wake up to you and the smell of Folgers Columbian Dark Roast

idgi it *wingmaster* some kind of euphemism? Or are ppl really directly reading "barbecue sauce on around mouth" = "period blood"

feel like I'm missing something

honestly there was no way for me to get an accurate "creepy" read on the commercial being that I didn't see it back in 2009 and now have the expectation of incest clouding my judgment. but on calibrating my instrument, I would say it's more awkward than creepy.

it's not Falcor winking at Atreyu levels of O_O

Doug Pippin came up with the idea early on that the client loved, which was an older brother coming home from West Africa who was working in the Peace Corps and whose sister was a certain age that she grew up quite a bit while he was away, so he barely recognized her in a playful manner.

This is basically in its core premise the plot of every indie sleeper where a rootless dude comes home after a lengthy absence and bones his mom/sister.

He actually looks serious when he says "wrong house".

Like he...

Wants it to be

the

wrong

house

xp - ah, that holiday classic The Family Bone

the fact that he seems to not recognize her is odd, I get that he's been away but hasn't he ever heard of a PHOTOGRAPH!?!?

"all of Africa is like Biblical times, that's why he wouldn't know who she was. There's no technology there."

"Er...i don't think that's corre-"

"EXCUSE ME. MY chair says DIRECTOR. Does yours?"

Jonah was the cameraman?

Just for the auditions is how I read it.

xxxp ta gyac I guess :-/

I haven't laughed this hard in a couple weeks, good job ILE

Aimless has transformed the world by inventing the concept of Sedarishipping.

For the worse or for the better? I do not know.

bump

it's a long way from West Africa

:)

Hey maybe they come from a culture where that’s okay.

i couldn't find any good coffee in Africa

also sis your hot

incest is back baby

back in school we used to dream about this everyday

oh hey y'all, just got back from rome and am looking forward to some real mfing pizza *unfolds jaw predator-style, crams in box of room temperature domino's*

since (shockingly) i haven't mentioned this yet, the actress who plays the sister is the daughter of jeffrey combs, star of re-animator and a great many star trek episodes

the best part of waking up