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porno dream: leave me now!

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so i had this really explicit sex dream about a girl in my art class (previous status: "nice person, 'bouncy', kinda cute, not *really* my type tho), and now it's mutating into a quasi-crush based solely around these intense subconscious porno visions of last week. and nothing 'real'er. pretty soon she's gonna notice the leering. how do i go back to normal? this too will pass?

(ps. it didn't help meeting her boyfriend and noticing that he was one of the 12 people in the whole world i could take in a fistfight)
(pps. i'm really really not the violent type but us weaklings can't help sizing up similarly feeble competition.)

― Mitch Lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Monday, 14 October 2002 18:07 (twenty-three years ago)

Hey, well at least you didn't dream about f'in Jurassic 5 last night. (though thankfully it wasn't a Jurassic 5 porno dream).

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 14 October 2002 18:10 (twenty-three years ago)

"Boong-Ga! Boong-Ga! Now featuring Jurassic 5!"

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 14 October 2002 18:12 (twenty-three years ago)

Dan, I want to drop a quarter to be in your world for exactly 7 minutes and 32 seconds.. then quickly escape.

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 14 October 2002 18:19 (twenty-three years ago)

That's strange, J5 was on the radio today and my friend said "did that guy just say 'i'll enter in your back door'

― Ronan (Ronan), Monday, 14 October 2002 18:20 (twenty-three years ago)

we're already on undie-hop ass fucking? i should've known this thread'd come to no good.

― Mitch Lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Monday, 14 October 2002 18:27 (twenty-three years ago)

it's concept art!

― jel -- (jel), Monday, 14 October 2002 18:32 (twenty-three years ago)

i keep reading the thread title as "pomo dream", so that would make sense.

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 14 October 2002 18:41 (twenty-three years ago)

pomo dreams come to no good either.

― jess (dubplatestyle), Monday, 14 October 2002 19:01 (twenty-three years ago)

''we're already on undie-hop ass fucking? i should've known this thread'd come to no good.''

that's what you get for trusting ILX with yer dreams.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Monday, 14 October 2002 19:02 (twenty-three years ago)

i remember mark richardson had the same problem, but in reverse: every time there was anything pomo going on, he'd read porno.

no-one's helping yet.

― Mitch Lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Monday, 14 October 2002 20:56 (twenty-three years ago)

mitch, try masturbating.

― jess (dubplatestyle), Monday, 14 October 2002 20:59 (twenty-three years ago)

jess, you cad. onanism is my first solution to any problem. it's not solving this one. is there no such thing as the foolproof de-crushifier? y'know how nervous people should supposedly imagine their audience clad in nothing but underclothes? can't i just picture this girl in a 'they might be giants' t-shirt or something?

― Mitch Lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Monday, 14 October 2002 21:30 (twenty-three years ago)

there that did it.

― Mitch Lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Monday, 14 October 2002 21:32 (twenty-three years ago)

no wait it didn't.

― Mitch Lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Monday, 14 October 2002 21:32 (twenty-three years ago)

"sk8r boi" is really good! i would dance to it!

― Mitch Lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Monday, 14 October 2002 21:54 (twenty-three years ago)

had this problem a few years back when I had the dream about my girlfriend's best friend! awkward as all hell, particularly as said best friend was nobody I ever want to be's idea of a catch (not physically unattractive, just dumb as a fucking rock). talking about it here will help, and it will pass--trust me on this one.

― M Matos (M Matos), Monday, 14 October 2002 22:56 (twenty-three years ago)

oh, and considering that electro DJ Tommie Sunshine has just finished remixing "Sk8er Boi," you will be dancing to it soon-ish enough!

― M Matos (M Matos), Monday, 14 October 2002 22:57 (twenty-three years ago)

i think i'm already over it.

side note: this is the first ilx post i've ever made from university.

― Mitch Lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Tuesday, 15 October 2002 13:05 (twenty-three years ago)

it's just the lingering aftereffects now, thank goodness. tho i haven't really had any kind of crush for like 7 months now, in retrospect this little diversion was actually kinda nice, in it's way.

i just wanted to revive this to thank matos for the sincere reply. and to report that now that i'm accessing ilx from university, the small part of my life that was still a little get-up-n-go!, a little sunshine-y, a little monitor-free, is officially over.

― Mitch Lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Thursday, 17 October 2002 18:34 (twenty-three years ago)

I was going to say it would simply pass, but it seems it already has. It's happened to me more times than I care to remember - it's amazing how the spectre of analingus can confuse a working relationship.

― Mark C (Mark C), Friday, 18 October 2002 10:43 (twenty-three years ago)

Sounds like a strange office.

― Ronan (Ronan), Friday, 18 October 2002 10:47 (twenty-three years ago)

five years pass...

porno is a way for one to see into his own conception, the origin of his own life. he is immersed deeply in the primarcy of his own life. the dark animal nature behind his own soul.

― burt_stanton, Monday, 18 August 2008 05:46 (seventeen years ago)

don't you see? you are watching you. being made. you are there in that moemnt and see the truth behind everything. that is why we watch porno. thank you.

― burt_stanton, Monday, 18 August 2008 05:48 (seventeen years ago)

I like how the girls in my dreams are totally willing to have sex with me. And I can pick them up and toss them around and get different girls. Unfortunately there's usually a problem of, 'we can't find a place to be alone' or some other stupid obstacle blocking the way.

― CaptainLorax, Monday, 18 August 2008 06:17 (seventeen years ago)

Ladies and gentlemen, burt_stanton is mad lifted.

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Monday, 18 August 2008 08:34 (seventeen years ago)


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