On Your Marks, Get Set, Baaaaake! A Thread for Great British Baking Show / Bake Off & all of its sundry delights

Mary Berry: Angel
Paul Hollywood: silver gorilla fox

My knowledge only covers Netflix US-aired seasons which are the English Bake Off seasons 4/5/6 (it's confusing I know)

Let us now discuss Russet Gandalfs, bread lions, genoese sponges & why you dont throw your baked alaska in the bin

S1 - Nancy is a BOSS i love her
Scottish Norman is adorable
Russet Gandalf Ian <3

S2 - Ruby is my fave
Kimberly is a genius
Frances is lovely but her teeth scare me
Howard <3

s3 NADIYA FOREVER but seriously I have seem this season 3 times and i love it so much, they're all lovely esp Matt the Fireman

sue & mel are grate i love them

so weird seeing it called "baking show", it's like calling 30 rock "television building"

not thrilled about it either, trying not to dwell

soz

lol no its cool *rages-*

Great British Flour & Sugar Hour

gifs i have loved

King Luis

http://goodtoknow.media.ipcdigital.co.uk/111/000012e0d/6079/Luis.gif

Matt the Fireman <3

https://2982-presscdn-29-70-pagely.netdna-ssl.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/Great-British-Bake-Off-Mel-and-Matt.gif

Norman the Scot & his adorable semaphore

http://tvdaily.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/norman.gif

We have all been this Dorrett

http://i.imgur.com/kBUntMB.gif

The Dorrett thing is SO SAD

I always scream when people drop their food, or like a layer falls off the top off a cake - I don't know why, it makes me really nervous, like watching a small child on a really tall climbing frame.

Mr Veg found the first 3 seasons of Bake-Off for me on the t0rentz

Season 1 format is rather different! The tent travels round to different cities, they eliminate 2 bakers each episode, and Sue and Mel do a lot of 'history of the biscuit' 'history of the cake' interstitial stuff during challenges so it's not 100% baking heavy the way it is now. Which isn't great, cuts too much into the baking which is the best part. Also episode 1 inside the tent was shot very jumpily, and not very well light, so it wasn't nearly as colorful as it quickly became in the next episode. Thankfully they fixed that pretty quick.
Mary Berry's hair is very flat!
Bakers call out to the judges and ask how much time is left!
And there's some dude doing the voiceover which is v weird.

Favorite moment so far was Ep 1 with Sue sitting on a blanket inside a stone ring with an eccentric-voiced longhaired baking historian discussing bannocks and I have NO idea how she sat through that without bursting into gales of laughter. I wish I could find a photo of him.

oh and:
signature bakes are a little bit looser: bake any kind of cake, bake any kind of biscuit
technicals so far have been basics like victoria sponges or scones, but the bakers are given the ingredients only: no method at all

and there's a weird little canteen area in back where bakers can go up and ask for items, one lady ran over and asked for double cream.

it's kind of fun seeing how it's all evolved!

god the showstoppers are out of control on S1

SIX different types of bread rolls, half a dozen each! 3 savory, 3 sweet

SIX canapes, 3 savory, 3 sweet, half a dozen each!

Three puddings: suet, baked, crumble!

they must have drowned in leftovers, holy shit

i would have ptsd after these

it is crazy how good this show is at building flopsweat tension around some of the lowest stakes imaginable

Every week has the "are they going to complete this in time for the judges" montage before the end of the round, and ALMOST EVERY TIME it's completely fine, and yet it worries me every single episode

totally!! it's a very chill show compared to top chef etc but I still get stressed out

s1 almost done

- can't STAND ruth and it makes me feel bad bc shes a good baker etc. idk. buu her stupid "boy bait" pudding and making quiche for the finale "for the men" it's like she's pandering to paul and it drives me barmy

-they have clearly done some work reigning in paul bc he was a borderline WANKER in this season. key moment: dismissed ruth's cupcakes as too girly AS THE ONLY MAN ON A PANEL OF WOMEN!! and farting on about stuff looking commercial & professional ragh i love him now but i could slap him almost once every episode

- mary berry telling miranda she reminded her of hrself when she was young <3 that would make my life

S2 report:

Next to Tamal, Rob is the most beautiful creature I have seen in this show so far

*dies*

though I would have eloped with Keith in college imo

Hi! I'm watching the Netflix season now, and it's so refreshing watching a reality competition without any producer-mandated villains.

Also, I forget who said it, but when I heard somebody mention "roasted veg" I got a good chuckle.

Also also I have a crush on Kate.

Like she is more Captain Chaos than Jordan ever was.

Also also also I decided to put closed captions on because SO MANY ACCENTS, but even with the subtitles, I still have no clue what the contestants are talking about.

Kate is v cool but def has captain chaos tendencies

Though lets be real, the *true* Captain Chaos is Jordan Crazy Teeth

Maybe Jordan didn't last long enough to impress his chaos on me, but with Kate, she's up one week, then down the next, then oh noes her dough is still raw and yet she ends up in second place anyway! She is a roller coaster!

I dunno I just picture Jordan covered head to foot in flour with a saucepan burning in the background

Kate's hair fascinated me. Like this amazing curly braided amazingness. And she seemed like she'd be cool to hang out with

Speaking of hair, Chetna's haircut is soooo stylish, love it.

yes! also her grey is so good

Chetna was my baking crush

Russet Gandalf was p cute but I think I kiiiind of fancy Richard? Dimples + pencil behind the ear is a winning combo

and i have a girlcrush on Nancy. She's saucy

It's only natural that the Queen of Spices has pepper in her hair! xxxps

Very distracted by Deborah and those pictures of her husband and child which are just really hard to make sense of given her apparent age.

And why are there only photos to show? Did she steal someone else's photos like she steals ingredients??

dude that's pretty ageist & mean

I mean yeah, sorry...but...don't you wonder about people's lives? There's a story there.

there's a differemce between "wondering" & "side-eyeing"

I finished Season 2 of English bake off & it's pretty marvellous

Jo's such a love - bubbly but terrified, Essex mum finally doing "something for herself". I read online that her husband was doing 16 years in jail for money laundering at the time. Which just made me love her more. she seemed like she mightve had a hard life & that confirmed it

and MaryAnne!! What a treat. Rugby champion, baking historian, mum, wizard. Amazing. She has a book!

Janet was hilarious - mr veg said her facial expressions reminded him of Beaker from the muppets

lots of great women in this season.

As for the guys -

dreamboat Rod turned out to be a bit of a disaster, very disorganized, bit too cavalier. he definitely put the wind up Paul, I've never seen the silver fox come down on a baker like he did with Rod.

sweet baby Jason had sooooooo much potential, very talented for one so young but was just a tad too green for the big leagues. Definitely fun to watch though.

I just finished the Chetna season! I really admired Richard for his ability to laugh at himself, and it was sad to see him crumble in the last week, though I would've been fine with any of the final three winning. (When they showed a picture of a young Richard with a full head of hair, I can see why Veg might crush on him!)

One episode into the next season, and watching Ruby struggle with her lack of self-confidence is so painful (I empathize with her completely), I'm not sure I can handle a whole season's worth (I caught a random episode of this season on PBS and know she hangs around for at least a little while).

Rubes is one of my favorites, I love her so much.

She looks like the daughter of Saffron Burrows and Elizabeth Berkeley, plus her look of utter astonishment when she was Star Baker in bread week was lolz.

That aside, this cast is so much less likeable than the previous one! So many stubborn people and/or people whose insecurities are showing. :(

Yeah... it grew on me though. Francis is kind of a crazy sorcerer with her amazing showstoppers, i'm in awe of her creativity

Slight crush on Kimberley from that season. And Howard is all-time great.

Richard had a weird Martin Freeman vibe, I thought

(in a good way)

I wrote a tl:dr blog post about GBBO for my own amusement...

http://tourdefrump.blogspot.com/2017/03/perfection-failure-and-why-great.html

https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2017/mar/16/noel-fielding-and-sandi-toksvig-to-host-new-great-british-bake-off

Noel Fielding and Sandi Toksvig to host new Great British Bake Off

New presenters will join new judge Prue Leith and Bake Off stalwart Paul Hollywood in the Channel 4 version of the show

That should kill it off then.

It'll be all about the "SxTensn" between her and PH, now....

i love that they treat being on GBBO now like being knighted by the queen. like, who else to replace matt lucas than alison hammond of course? who else to replace prue than nigella? it's sort of fan servicey but also there's a sort of like, british pride... elevating our best to this newfound emblem of the country.. i love it personally. i also binge old nigella episodes off iplayer when i'm in the UK so i may be biased

finally catching up on the most recent season - up to quarter finals & kinda love this group!

i have a crush on Toby <3

I loved Toby, he seems to be cast from the same mould as Stephen from this last series of The Traitors

starts again this Tuesday with nigella.

but extra slice has been replaced with 'Second Helpings' an hour later. John Richardson and Judi Love.

(extra slice was always a bit cosy for me, but i don't get the feeling that the new show will be an improvement)

I kinda liked Extra Slice here and there but the interactive audience bake segment was always a bit much.
But I love Jo Brand! And Tom whatsisface!
I find John Richardson wholly annoying.

Anyway interested to see how Nigella works out

No Brand has been very quiet this year. Hope she’s OK.

Extra Slice absolutely didn't need fixing. Also can't be doing with Judi Love at all.

I’ve looked and JB has a book and tour coming up so may not have been available.

watching the follow-up show and they've taken all the comedy elements out of the titles (this despite having two comedians hosting) and the whole thing feels like they'd rather not be doing it. and it's on at 10:30 rather than prime time friday. i'm only 10 minutes in but it feels like a fun-free zone.

as for the main show, bullets were dodged.

no studio audience either. it sounds like the only people clapping are the crew.

I assumed they programmed it like that to entice people to watch the Rob Beckett gameshow that's on after Bake Off.
Last night's episode of Bake Off reminded me yet again that we need some triathlon version of Drag Race that encompasses Bake Off and Sewing Bee in one mighty test of skill. I would far rather watch drag queens try to make a coffee walnut cake to be judged by Nigella and Paul than whatever it is they're doing on actual Drag Race these days.

Fun opener. The intense guy who won star baker was very funny. Nigella had very "journalist trying to impress their editor" vibes - she seems like she'll be a more interesting counterpoint to Paul than Prue, who had great style but not much TV charisma IMO.

Nigella seems very good at recognising contestants inner freaks and taking them seriously -- as opposed to jokily like Noel -- which is something we haven't really had from a presenter before. Overall there also seemed to be more focus on actual cooking tips ("you don't need to sieve that!" and (frequently) "more salt!") whcih I appreciated.

I missed last season entirely for the first time, did anything interesting happen? I'll miss Extra Slice, when the guests are good, it's been better than the main show for a while.

I already like Nigella as a cohost - imo she brings back (for me) the much-missed “home baker” vibes of Mary Berry, but with a cool new sensibility & a gentle empathy that has been lacking with the Prue-Paul hammer fest.

Also I was a fangirl of Nigella for a while back in the day so kinda thrilled to have her on Bake Off

Danni the unfortunate baker who landed in the bottom has such a strange vibe! Like 19th century puppet brought to life. So tragic watching the cake topple over though. poor kid.

I like the gays, esp Yorkshire Tom

the winner boy Mo is so lowkey it’s like he’s afraid of smiling!

imo she brings back (for me) the much-missed “home baker” vibes of Mary Berry, but with a cool new sensibility & a gentle empathy that has been lacking with the Prue-Paul hammer fest.

100% this, and completely agree with Chuck's Overall there also seemed to be more focus on actual cooking tips ("you don't need to sieve that!" and (frequently) "more salt!") whcih I appreciated..

I thought it was very good, and seemed pretty fresh. I know Paul Hollywood has a reputation as a weirdo and not a great guy or whatever, but at least he's willing to go with new ideas and new women joining in and doing things in a new way.

He also seems very willing to be humiliated by his co-hosts every episode, which is, I don't know – good? I kind of like how undefensive he is, happy to be the Margaret Dumont in the tent, which is unusual for that sort of peacocky male presenter.

They've also really cut down the comedy bits since Matt Lucas left, thank fuck

the little intro bit actually good for once

OK, I was wrong, Nigella slots in very well and I like her approach.

They've also really cut down the comedy bits since Matt Lucas left, thank fuck

OTM, he was horrible. Almost had to stop watching during his seasons

Nigella fit right in and added a nice balance to Paul's approach

I also like that there’s a few somewhat “older” bakers like Gary or Connie etc, it feels a bit less like a parade of younguns this time idk

It is headcanon in my household that Danni is James Acaster’s sister

LMAO perfect

can't not see the acaster thing now

10 bakers, 30 cookies each. 300 cookies. that's the crew sorted for snacks for the next fortnight

Tom's gonna win this handily (unless he can't do bread)

Connie crushing the technical was v enjoyable & her showstopper moment was so lovely & moving

I've never seen anyone look so much like they wanted to murder Paul Hollywood as Moyin in this episode.

Yeah that was rough!

Liked the first 2 audience challenges but wearable cakes is a bit fucking daft if you ask me. But lot of good attempts! Loved Connie’s hat & the Bengali “short king” crown & Tom’s Dolly wig topper was pretty damn cool imo

I thought Mo’s wings were pretty but srsly who tf wants to eat that much rice paper lol

Not sad to see the going home person go home, not really a fan

I do not get this mania for cutting their time down to the wire, seems really unfair and contrary.

What's with the new proving doodads on the counters?

This Technical Challenge = Paul Fucks Around, Finds Out.

I love it when technicals go this poorly because it’s on THEM, not the bakers. IMO.

Also roasted grapes are a menace

feels a bit like this season's bakers are not particularly impressive. last season had several impressive bakers & fun personalities. this year's crew is also lacking a bit in the personality dept.

Yeah Tom seems like the only one with a lot of irl technical knowledge & skill
Maybe Gary but he is a little more basic

Agree, but the overall vibe of this season is tremendous, particularly Alison and Noel who seem to be loving every minute.

Alison, Noel and Nigella are keeping it entertaining. Paul looked like he wanted to walk out in disgust during bread week :)

I love now that every time Paul gets too bullying w his critiques Nigella says something nice about about the bake.

I kind of don't blame Paul, when they're casting people who've only learned to bake bread by looking at three TikToks. otoh, it is a great way of demystifying bread baking.

I’m sure they’d have understood the assignment if the flatbreads were called pitas (and there has never been a successful flatbread challenge anyway). Besides, ‘hurry up and make bread’ is not exactly conducive to a good result.

Before he said the TikTok thing, we were wondering about whether Mo knows books exist or not.

Still doesn't absolve Paul, who pulled the classic narcissist "I can't fail, only be failed". Very much appreciate Nigella's vibe towards him.

> ‘hurry up and make bread’

the lack of time was a clue though

(in retrospect)

I feel like Mo is a m/f with some dark secrets

I don't understand how he ended up on the show. He is clearly really good at some elements of the show and also really not good at being on TV and I don't quite get now, in this age of not having to be on TV, why he applied to do this? He genuinely sometimes appears to have wandered in by accident.

yeah idgi either! I did laugh at that moment when the judges asked if he enjoyed the dessert challenge & he was like “yes! :D :D” and they all stepped back like “whoah” from his sudden enthusiasm lol

His mango mousse looked p good

Very happy about this week’s star baker, incredibly well deserved

He's comedy gold, though! He thinks bread is boring, he hates most of the things he's baking, but he seems really gifted at baking. I think he's very funny.

Friend on Insta this morning - If you don't wish Connie to win this, then you're a monster, and your soul is a cardboard box.

Hoping for a Connie & Tom final

They’re not going to lose the remaining two women (Connie and Clara) before Gary.

Tom and Connie are definitely finalists unless there’s an un-ignorable fuck-up.