Thread for ridiculous, but real, bumper stickers.

In traffic this morning on my way to work, I saw a bumper sticker that read, "Contractor: Because BADASS isn't an official job title" and for some reason, there was a picture of a hand grenade on either side of the sentence. It was, of course, affixed to a huge three ton truck. Just the sheer aggressiveness of the sticker made me laugh, but it really was the entire package of arbitrary and stereotypical hostility that one would associate with a huge truck driving, goatee sporting male.

I'm also reminded of the time, in late 2001, in the heat of the post-9/11 hysteria when terrorism was the target of a lot of propaganda and passionate displays of over-the-top "patriotism" was very much accepted, if not outright expected. I don't remember where I was, but I was living in Reno at the time. In any case, I saw a bumper sticker that was a very plain white background with block black text and it simply said, "ABORTION IS THE REAL TERRORISM." I didn't have a smartphone at the time, otherwise I would definitely have taken a picture, because man, that is just comedy gold.

Share your greatest hits here.

https://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2017/11/09/08/4627F07F00000578-0-image-a-31_1510217246412.jpg

https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-9ZFrL4cBq_I/UpQLemEIm-I/AAAAAAAALr0/I4pe9TbmlpQ/w1200-h630-p-k-no-nu/nov00+002.JPG

. . .unless you're black.

http://i64.tinypic.com/4sk2sk.jpg

‘Morons text/drive also eat dung’ is a sentiment I can text ge behind.

RU1?

"DO YOU FOLLOW JESUS THIS CLOSE?"

Saw a big three ton truck on the 405 in five o`clock traffic yesterday and it had quite possibly the greatest bumper sticker I've ever seen. Simple white block decal letters on the back window of the cab that simply said, "BIG TRUCK LITTLE PENIS"

https://i.imgur.com/VQLbH19.jpg

the car in front of me at the McDonald's drive-thru

https://i.postimg.cc/02wCwM46/20210623-134733.jpg

the ecosse sticker is [chef's kiss]

i can't see it?

oh huh i can see it on zing but not on desktop.

Murphy's Law of Bumper Stickers: The more offensive you find one or more bumper stickers on the car in front of you, the longer you will be stuck behind that car.

Not a bumper sticker, but

HTFU

If "H" means "Hang," I endorse this message.

eh sorry it's fine. my work laptop doesn't like it for some reason.

me, on the other hand..... wow.

Powered...by....Jesus

who loves cock apparently judging by other bumper stickers on the car

...and Satan on the other side.

This is clearly a shitposting car.

NO AIRBAGS
WE DIE LIKE REAL MEN

I saw one that said “Eat A Dick” using the religious-symbols-shaped-like-letters that usually say “Coexist” and it made me cackle.

there's someone who is known around town for having an I EAT ASS bumper sticker, and yet weirdly he wasn't the Florida Man arrested for having it (that guy drives a truck, this guy drives a red sports car)

xpost I must have that

NIXON
NOW MORE THAN EVER

(inside a rear window, not on a bumper, in Birmingham UK.)

Semi-off-thread

I once saw the vanity plate GRT-BJS.

Could that mean anything other than what it obviously means?

Grout: Bathroom jam solved

it's obvious: the guy driving this car plays the piano. GReaTest Billy Joel Song.

UPTNGRL

Perhaps not so much ridiculous, just...unexpected

new type of guy just dropped pic.twitter.com/XzczL91wMs

— yova (@yovaslavia) February 14, 2022