Goatees - why?

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I have had a goatee for 3 days so I've given it a try. They are rubbish.

― Tom (Groke), Monday, 4 November 2002 13:22 (twenty-three years ago)

b-but you look good tom: like a faux-blasé nate patrin!!

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 4 November 2002 13:26 (twenty-three years ago)

I want a beard. I SO want a beard. It's not fair that men get to have fun with facial caligraphy and sideburns and all that, and I am excluded from the fun.

I mean, WHAT is the female equivalent of male experimental beard growing? Fingernail extensions? Hairdye disasters?

― kate, Monday, 4 November 2002 13:29 (twenty-three years ago)

i like it cause it makes me look like Satan. which is a plus, given my job.

where goatees suck -- keeping them trim. just like regular beards, i suppose.

― Tad (llamasfur), Monday, 4 November 2002 13:30 (twenty-three years ago)

As well as sounding absolutely pitiful, Peter Gabriel was sporting an unflattering Leon Trotsky style beard on Jools Holland the other night.

― David (David), Monday, 4 November 2002 13:31 (twenty-three years ago)

nothing less than a good old evan parker-style sea cap'n's beard will do for me.

― Marcello Carlin, Monday, 4 November 2002 13:40 (twenty-three years ago)

I can't grow a full beard. My goatee gets fuller and whiter and more manly from year to year, but from earlobe to chin I remain a twelve-year-old boy.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Monday, 4 November 2002 13:53 (twenty-three years ago)

How long have they been called 'goatees' (in the UK)? I had always thought that it was a recent invention/American import, but the other day I heard an old man say it on telly and I got wondering.

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 4 November 2002 14:02 (twenty-three years ago)

Kate - have a look at the "Hairy Women" thread a bit back and then tell me you still want a beard. Personally, I'd give everything I have to not have to shave. But then, I don't want a beard even more. My compromise is an "I'll-leave-it-til-I-absolutely-have-to" kind of stubbly look, which pleases precisely no-one but me. Ho hum.

― lol p xx, Monday, 4 November 2002 14:06 (twenty-three years ago)

i like goatees without the moustache.
next time i'm gonna try those: shave my moustache and grow a chin-only goatee instead.
i'd rather be less hairy, but since i am - let's play with it!

― joan vich (joan vich), Monday, 4 November 2002 14:12 (twenty-three years ago)

I didn't say hairy legs or hairy arms, I really just want sideburns.

I've had dreams where I was shaving. Then I wake up smooth and girly and sideburnless again, and I cry. I'm sure scraping face is horrible, but man, I'd love to have muttonchops.

I even bought a pair of fake sideburns in Camden Market and wore them till they fell to pieces. I loved them so much. There are photos somewhere on the web...

― kate, Monday, 4 November 2002 14:13 (twenty-three years ago)

Moustache & goatee combos only really work if the two parts join up at the sides. After a year or so of experimenting, I gave up and went with the chin-only option.

― robster (robster), Monday, 4 November 2002 14:51 (twenty-three years ago)

fuck goatees.

― g-kit (g-kit), Monday, 4 November 2002 14:59 (twenty-three years ago)

Goatees are GREBT. They look fantastic on me.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 4 November 2002 15:20 (twenty-three years ago)

Dan, the only thing that looks good on you is me.

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 4 November 2002 15:24 (twenty-three years ago)

DIRRTY! FILLTHY!

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 4 November 2002 15:41 (twenty-three years ago)

i am cursed with having the fastest growing facial hair in the world.

I hate the moustache part but i like playing with my chin hair, mmmm.

― Fuzzy (Fuzzy), Monday, 4 November 2002 16:28 (twenty-three years ago)

Facial hair is my curse, my burden, my loathing. I shave every day to rid myself of the foulness. Yup.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 4 November 2002 16:35 (twenty-three years ago)

Dan, the only thing that looks good on you is me.

(...and then they all jizz up...)

― j.lu (j.lu), Monday, 4 November 2002 16:36 (twenty-three years ago)

Time for a Dan/N. photoshop piece of hilarity, methinks.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 4 November 2002 16:44 (twenty-three years ago)

chin-only goatees are good to give your head a bit of shape or hide a weak chin or hide a bit of neck fat. a nice option for the boys but I'm still glad I don't have to shave or maintain any extra hair. I can't be arsed to shave my legs as it is.

― teeny (teeny), Monday, 4 November 2002 16:56 (twenty-three years ago)

I've had a goatee for ten years of so...I like 'em! Since there is quite a bit of "native" American" in my family, I have a difficult time growing facial hair (a folicle problem). Virtually ANY beard I try turns out to be a "goatee".

― Jim Whatthefuck, Monday, 4 November 2002 18:55 (twenty-three years ago)

FUCKERS HAVE A BEARD OR DONT HAVE A BEARD NONE OF THIS HALF ARSE NONESENSE.

― anthony easton (anthony), Monday, 4 November 2002 19:09 (twenty-three years ago)

Goatees on half of your arse: Classic or Dud?

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 4 November 2002 19:18 (twenty-three years ago)

b-but you look good tom: like a faux-blasé nate patrin!!

Quit being redundant.

― Nate Patrin (Nate Patrin), Monday, 4 November 2002 19:24 (twenty-three years ago)

If I ever get the money together, I'll have my face purged via electrolysis for life. A facial vasectomy. Because I know I never want to have a beard at any point in my life.

Goatees are silly, unless you're a goat. Soul patches (hair under the bottom lip but not on the chin), are repulsive. There's a fashion in London at the moment for men to be unshaven in a scuzzy way. Designer scuzziness. You can see it in bands like Coldplay and Doves. I can't stand it. If you're appearing on a stage or having your photo taken, the least you can do is have a bloody shave.

Girls with fake moustaches and sideburns, however, are deeply attractive.

― Dickon Edwards (Dickon Edwards), Monday, 4 November 2002 21:30 (twenty-three years ago)

goatees are fine. designer stubble is ok, stupid bit of hair ( tuft ) below bottom lip is, well, stupid.

― donna (donna), Monday, 4 November 2002 21:38 (twenty-three years ago)

'no' to goatees.

― RJG (RJG), Monday, 4 November 2002 21:44 (twenty-three years ago)

Neck hair only. Hot indie fashion of the 2010's... just wait.

(that said, I know several women who think "sys admin goatees" are sexy... go figure)

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 4 November 2002 21:53 (twenty-three years ago)

One of my coworkers has the COOLEST GOATEE EVER. No 'stache, inverted 'T' of hair coming down from his lip and following his jawline back approximately 2 inches. I AM JEALOUS.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 4 November 2002 21:58 (twenty-three years ago)

There's a fashion in London at the moment for men to be unshaven in a scuzzy way. Designer scuzziness

At the moment? Unless I'm missing some nuance of scuzziness this just sounds like 'designer stubble' (when was that term invented? must have been at least ten years ago if not more).

If you're appearing on a stage or having your photo taken, the least you can do is have a bloody shave.

Not if you look better slightly unshaven, which some men do.

― David (David), Monday, 4 November 2002 22:12 (twenty-three years ago)

they should call them gauchetees!!!

― Aaron A., Monday, 4 November 2002 22:14 (twenty-three years ago)

Not if you look better slightly unshaven, which some men do.

I completely disagree. If you must have a beard, groom it properly. Likewise sideburns: symmetrical and deliberately shaped or not at all. It's the unchecked, free range growth thing that I can't stand.

But I get the feeling I'm entirely alone on this one. So enjoy your scuzz.

― Dickon Edwards (Dickon Edwards), Monday, 4 November 2002 22:41 (twenty-three years ago)

If I ever get the money together, I'll have my face purged via electrolysis for life.

I've always wanted to do this as well. Wonder what the cost is?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 4 November 2002 22:45 (twenty-three years ago)

http://www.dogfacedboy.org/images/jojo.gif

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 4 November 2002 22:47 (twenty-three years ago)

I have a difficult time growing facial hair

Gar, I wish I had this 'problem'. Having non-American Indian blood, I need to shave twice a day if I want to be really clean-shaven. Which I do, as facial hair does not look good on anybody.

― sundar subramanian (sundar), Monday, 4 November 2002 22:54 (twenty-three years ago)

When I was a teenager visiting my stepdad's family in Chicago, his uncle saw my burgeoning Grunge Hipster Goatee and asked me succinctly: "Why do you cultivate on your face what grows wild on your ass?" I admitted that I had no answer to that.

― Nate Patrin (Nate Patrin), Monday, 4 November 2002 23:03 (twenty-three years ago)

You should have said, "Because chicks dig the ass."

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 4 November 2002 23:04 (twenty-three years ago)

have they discovered the "uncle" gene yet?

― mitch lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Monday, 4 November 2002 23:06 (twenty-three years ago)

Oh and when I was at the Clinic show at First Ave a couple weeks back there were TONS of indie kids with close-trimmed granola-munching '70s guidance counselor beards. Not to mention the lead singers of the two bands opening for them (the Standard and Apples In Stereo). It was horrifying.

― Nate Patrin (Nate Patrin), Monday, 4 November 2002 23:09 (twenty-three years ago)

I try to let the facial hair grow. It gets too itchy after a few weeks and I end up shaving it off.

― brg30 (brg30), Monday, 4 November 2002 23:24 (twenty-three years ago)

Do people with hairy faces age more quickly and then die?

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 4 November 2002 23:25 (twenty-three years ago)

no.

― mitch lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Monday, 4 November 2002 23:33 (twenty-three years ago)

yes

― ch. (synkro), Monday, 4 November 2002 23:34 (twenty-three years ago)

and if they don't, they should.

― angela (angela), Tuesday, 5 November 2002 11:10 (twenty-three years ago)

There are a lot of David Brent wannabees out there.

― Disgruntled office worker, Tuesday, 5 November 2002 13:59 (twenty-three years ago)

one year passes...

ugh

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Saturday, 2 October 2004 00:34 (twenty-one years ago)

I've lost mine, and now I'm going through razors like nobody's business.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Saturday, 2 October 2004 00:36 (twenty-one years ago)

DO NOT UGH THE GOATEE

― Dan Perry '08 (Dan Perry), Saturday, 2 October 2004 00:37 (twenty-one years ago)

UGH

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Saturday, 2 October 2004 00:43 (twenty-one years ago)

i grew one yesterday. i shaved it off today. depending on how long my hair is, it can look ok.

― darragh.mac (darragh.mac), Saturday, 2 October 2004 00:44 (twenty-one years ago)

haha I did this once in the early 90's. I was dumb! at least I did not get a tribal tattoo around my wrist or something.

― kyle (akmonday), Saturday, 2 October 2004 00:47 (twenty-one years ago)

i believe any type of shaved pattern on your face is reprehensible. from goatees, to chin straps, to fucking soul patches. LAME!

― cutty (mcutt), Saturday, 2 October 2004 00:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Goatees are terrible. Unless you want to look like a baseball player.

― mcd (mcd), Saturday, 2 October 2004 00:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Cutty OTM. I have a beard - I don't trim it (I'm lazy, I also haven't cut my hair for years and years). But I don't think carving patterns into your fur is cool.

― Kevin Gilchrist (Mr Fusion), Saturday, 2 October 2004 01:05 (twenty-one years ago)

UGH

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Saturday, 2 October 2004 01:08 (twenty-one years ago)

I wear a goatee because I can't grow hair on my cheeks, apparently. Maybe it's cool to look like a baseball player as well. And the lady likes it.

And I mean the cheeks ON MY FACE.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Saturday, 2 October 2004 04:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Why ruin the joke?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 2 October 2004 04:20 (twenty-one years ago)

I mean, WHAT is the female equivalent of male experimental beard growing? Fingernail extensions? Hairdye disasters?

-- kate

I don't think anyone has answered Kate's question yet.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Saturday, 2 October 2004 05:06 (twenty-one years ago)

I have an answer myself, but I am too busy to post it right now.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Saturday, 2 October 2004 05:18 (twenty-one years ago)

I truly feel that my goatee is a way of thinking.

― Ethan Hawke, Saturday, 2 October 2004 09:05 (twenty-one years ago)

ugh.

― cºzen (Cozen), Saturday, 2 October 2004 09:06 (twenty-one years ago)

I will however say that I wish "goatees" wasn't an anagram for something else.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Saturday, 2 October 2004 14:43 (twenty-one years ago)

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