"misunderstood" or just incomprehensible

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so, my posting style has seemingly been whittled down over the last 9 months to the one line bon mot/antagonisme(nb: possibly not a real world)/thort. the thing is that i feel like i'm usually just saying the same amount of stuff as in my old school multi-para posts. usually more! yet, despite the fact that i'm saying what seem to me to be very basic things (i'm no philosopher) or jokes, they seem to be constantly (and consistently) misintepreted (ESP on ilm.) now being me, of course, i have long wondered if i'm not making quite the sense i think and i'm just an incomprehensible goon. plus, i apparently have a tendency to "shut down any debate presented to me when i really should just bring it." (c. 2002 tracer hand.)

so, is it possible to be universally misunderstood or do you just need to work on yr communication skillz?

― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 19:57 (twenty-three years ago)

p.s. this is not a "make jess feel better" thread as i don't feel bad.

p.p.s. mark s to thread!

― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 19:58 (twenty-three years ago)

what are you talking about jess?

― donna (donna), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 19:59 (twenty-three years ago)

(thank you for getting that outta the way, donna.)

― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 20:02 (twenty-three years ago)

jess i have to go buy a pizza, i am weak w.hunger

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 20:05 (twenty-three years ago)

i don't understand.

― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 20:20 (twenty-three years ago)

youre welcome :-)
btw i havent been here long enough to notice any change in your posting style, but i am yet to find you incomprehensible.

― donna (donna), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 20:21 (twenty-three years ago)

Jess, you use decent amounts of sarcasm, and people know less about one another on ILM, so -- those of us who know anything about you "get" the one liners, but it seems like a lot of people just see a snarky one-liner pointing someone in their direction and, not knowing what you might mean by it, get defensive and assume you must (a) be a dick, and (b) hold whatever opinion they think is the opposite of theirs. (Cf if a teenager says "I don't like [rock band]" and another teenager says "but TRL is awful.")

― nabisco (nabisco), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 20:34 (twenty-three years ago)

I guess what I'm saying is that your posts make perfect sense, there's just something about them that causes people who don't follow them to make all sorts of assumptions about what you're trying to say.

― nabisco (nabisco), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 20:35 (twenty-three years ago)

I understand!

Though sometimes I'm skim reading ILX, so things do get a bit jumbled up in my mind sometimes.

― jel -- (jel), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 20:37 (twenty-three years ago)

''there's just something about them that causes people who don't follow them to make all sorts of assumptions about what you're trying to say''

but what is it abt the posts nabisco?

Personally I like your posts. the sarcasm is something I enjoy (though when you try to get serious it is hard to know whether you're serious or whether you're being sarcastic). ppl can spend a lot of time here (and you do) and I do think anyone who does gets 'irritable' (c. 2002 Melissa) from time to time.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 20:42 (twenty-three years ago)

great, so you "influence" me, i switch to lowercase, i pare down all my posts to snarky/obtuse/obscure one-liners, and now you're thinking about backing out cos of some troubled newbies?

fizzuck that.

― mitch lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 20:50 (twenty-three years ago)

mitch, do you realize that you're saying that i'm partly responsible for stripping you of your exuberance and refreshing lack of jadedness?!

― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 21:50 (twenty-three years ago)

i don't even know what i'm saying anymore. i'll shut up now. shoot me.

― mitch lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 22:11 (twenty-three years ago)

bang

― chzd (synkro), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 22:17 (twenty-three years ago)

*ducks*

― mitch lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 22:32 (twenty-three years ago)

For what it's worth, jess, I'm pretty sure I "get" all the jokes you make. I even laugh sometimes.

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 22:39 (twenty-three years ago)

I'd say that for awhile it seemed like you were mostly communicating irritability and you seem to have opened up a lot more, been more careful and precise wordswise, cleared your head which helps clear the air if that makes sense. I like yr sarcasm (and yr writing) a lot, so that autopilot sense bothered me. saw some of my own bad talking/writing habits in there too, so that had plenty to do w/it as well. (hope that doesn't sound patronizing or anything)

― M Matos (M Matos), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 22:43 (twenty-three years ago)

(i really did read "patronizing" as" patrinizing" there! no fooling!)

― mitch lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 22:58 (twenty-three years ago)

not how I meant it; not sure what the "in" version (har har) would be other than a pointless dig

― M Matos (M Matos), Tuesday, 12 November 2002 23:18 (twenty-three years ago)

frankly i think ilx has permanently crippled my ability for non one on one debate/discussion.

and i told you all not to talk about me! talking about mitch, however, is perfectly acceptable.

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 13 November 2002 00:14 (twenty-three years ago)

no-one?

― mitch lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Wednesday, 13 November 2002 09:06 (twenty-three years ago)

mitch i think youre cute, except physically

― ep, Wednesday, 13 November 2002 09:12 (twenty-three years ago)

wanna see me make chipmunk cheeks? ().()

― mitch lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Wednesday, 13 November 2002 09:15 (twenty-three years ago)

no mitch talk to me on aim im going to bed in ten min

― ep, Wednesday, 13 November 2002 09:18 (twenty-three years ago)

five months pass...

I don't even know what i'm saying anymore. i'll shut up now. shoot me.

- mitch

I don't even know anymore.

- jess

hehe, the influenced influences the influencer.

― Cozen (Cozen), Sunday, 27 April 2003 15:50 (twenty-two years ago)

To answer the long-dead question, now I've needlessly revived it.

I think I often 'get' what you're saying Jess, it can be difficult at times because sometimes the sarcasm is layered up so it's meant to bite back at you and sometimes it's just sarcasm, sometimes it's not even sarcasm at all and that's maybe where the problems come in: deciding how many layers, if at all, of irony your post is drenched in.

Obv., this is more a problem with people who don't know you, to veer on the safety of not assuming anything about anyone they'll just take a literal reading of whatever you say (ok ok I know this is already 'assuming something about someone').

Sometimes when you barb me I don't know if you mean, I often just read it as if you do mean it and stay out yr way because honestly, ultimately, it's not worth it. Maybe it is, maybe it'd be worth asking you what you're problem is, at the times you 'barb' but I don't have the ~~guts~~ time.

(I'm sorry if this is an untimely revival, I know yr feeling a bit down on ilx ~~ever~~ lately, but I couldn't resist the opportunity to cart out the 'i don't even know anymore' line.)

― Cozen (Cozen), Sunday, 27 April 2003 15:57 (twenty-two years ago)

(Obv., sarcasm != irony.)

― Cozen (Cozen), Sunday, 27 April 2003 16:02 (twenty-two years ago)

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