It's 2020. Do you answer the phone?

Someone I know. I actually think I am very out of step with most people I know in that I do enjoy talking to people on the phone and always have. Most unsolicited calls I get are those spam ones so I don’t answer, they can leave me a voicemail if they’re real.

They can leave a voicemail even if they're fake, it turns out. Voicemail transcription is Good Enough that I generally don't even have to listen to the voicemails in the event that some service provider is calling me.

i will never answer the phone

'I answer the phone when the caller is in my contacts, but basically nobody calls me' except that people (or 'people' rather) who are not in my contacts constantly call me. My voicemail is often cluttered with very important messages from robots about auto insurance for some reason (nb, I do not own a car).

A question I occasionally ponder: why do we still call (smart)phones phones?

As to who calls me - family and a couple of friends. Has really fallen off in the past decade as everyone just does voice notes or messages instead.

I live in a different telephonic universe than the rest of humanity.

They can leave a voicemail even if they're fake, it turns out. Voicemail transcription is Good Enough that I generally don't even have to listen to the voicemails in the event that some service provider is calling me.

Yeah implicit in the question is that we’re all (in the US anyway) constantly getting spam calls

I swapped out my smartphone for a flip phone (which I guess is the "I don't even own a television" option) and what I've found is that while I always pick up if I hear the phone ringing, I miss a lot more texts and calls because I'm not as hyper-aware of what my phone is doing all the time.

Sometimes at work people ask if I will "hop on a quick call". Bitch I will never hop on a call

I answer the phone when the caller is in my contacts, which happens frequently

only person who calls me are my two best friends, and occasionally my mother. I answer for them.

Synexus calls each month to make sure I didn't die from the vaccines for COVID trial

I hate talking on the phone.

I hate talking on the phone.

We should poll this.

I have two phones and I almost always answer them unless it's obvious spam (on the work phone, outlook is prevented from sharing contact data with the iOS contacts app, so I get a lot of calls that "aren't in my contacts" but pretty much only come from 2 or 3 area codes - on the personal phone, we have T-Mobile which does the "scam likely" thing

Also I call people a lot. Usually while walking the dog.

I have started reading P.G. Wodehouse stories over the phone regularly to my friend who's been dealing with a lot of depression and chronic headaches, and it's been good for both of us.

in contrast to Silby I will basically always hop on a quick call because if I'm being asked to do that it means somebody suspects that I can help them un-fuck something, sometimes even preemptively, so I see it as an opportunity to minimize harm and I'd much rather help deal with a problem in a short conversation than in an ugly email thread that has way too many people cc'd on it

"I answer the phone when the caller is in my contacts, but basically nobody calls me"

Answered this, meaning "nobody in my contacts calls me." I do get random phone calls on a regular basis. Sometimes, if I'm near a computer, I will google the number to make sure it's not an important call from a number that's not in my contacts, but 90% of the time, it's not. In many cases, I find a record of other people who have reported the number for spam.

I read an article the other day about how some state health departments are working with telecom companies to have contact tracers show up on everyone's phones as "Department of Health" in addition to the number, so that people don't ignore the call. That seems like a good idea to me.

Oh my gosh Lily that’s so sweet, good use of phone

xp to Tombot yes and also in a personal context too, like if you are fighting with someone over WhatsApp/email i will always take it to the phone because fuck spending any more time dragging it out that way

I only answer if 1) caller is in my contacts 2) i feel like talking to that person, who is either my boyfriend (yes) or one of my parents (no) 99% of the time.

I answer the phone when the caller is in my contacts, but basically nobody calls me

I also have my phone on silent and with vibration off

Halfway between options 2 & 3: I still get phone calls from my parents and from close friends (at least when we're in the same city) but 'frequently' doesn't quite describe it, because my benchmark is stuck in the 90s.

xpost It was her idea! It made me so happy because she often doesn't reach out when she's having a hard time. She asked for funny stories specifically, and it's sent me back to all my childhood favorites, which has been wonderful.

i answer the phone if i know who's calling, it's not frequent but it's not hardly ever either

I hate the phone. I'll sometimes answer if I know who it is (either my mum or one friend who still prefers phone contact to other types), but often I just won't answer because I hate it so much.

I answer the phone when the caller is in my contacts, but basically nobody calls me

^ This. Suits me.

Do video calls count for the purposes

every convo is like....

"Hello?"
"Hi Rob, how are you?"
"hey, I'm goo-"
"Great, great, listen, just had a question for you. I-"
"Ok."
"(nervous laugh) I was wondering if you were free on Thursday....bec-"
"Thursda...oh I'm sorry, go ahead"
"No that's ok, I was done"
"Thursday I'm free...I thi-"
"Great! Well....oh, sorry, go ahead"
"No, you go, I was done"
"oh I was going to ask if you wanted to (garbled audio)"
"Can you repeat, I didn't catch taht"
"Hello? can you hear me!"
"Yes, I can hear you, can you hear me?"
"Can you hear me?"
"Yes, do you not hear me?"

don't like answering the phone, but i like voicemails even less. fortunately no one ever calls me

Do video calls count for the purposes

I always answer the land line, and every time I do I ask myself why am I keeping it.

no land line, answer cell if I know the caller, and NO VOICEMAIL for ten years now

I answer the phone when the caller is in my contacts, but basically nobody calls me

I also have my phone on silent and with vibration off

― Politically homely (jim in vancouver), Wednesday, December 2, 2020 7:17 PM (twenty-six minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

my man

My dad refuses to leave a voicemail and it drives me batshit. If I don't answer, he'll just call back again half an hour later. And again. 99.9% of the time he is just calling to say hi and doesn't need anything specific, but my heart skips a beat when I say, walk out of a movie, and I see four missed calls from him.

fuck leaving a voicemail tbf

I mean it'd be nice to know how crucial it is to call the person back.

if I don't know what it's about or get a voicemail, I generally won't call back at all

is there an option for "I kept my old number so if it's in the area code I actually live, yes, otherwise, no"

I answer the phone. Never know when somebody could be calling you from their office line or maybe their phone's out of juice or they're in the hospital or something like that. However, if it's a number I don't recognize I never speak first. I just sit there making little mouth noises until someone addresses me or they hang up.

yeah yeah someone had to post it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SrkKvk2Lrjw

HAD TO

I enjoy talking on the phone, but the notice that the vanishingly-small number of people I know who dont loathe it engage in it so rarely that they are gradually forgetting how to do it (myself included), and most convos sound like the dialogue neanderthal posted.

98% of people I know, even folks my age and older who were adults when talking on the phone was still normal, today treat getting an unscheduled phone call from a friend as only slightly less horrifying than being sent an unsolicited dickpic.

I don't even own a receive any texts much less actual phone calls outside of work where lots of phone calls happen. I don't have overlapping interests with many people. Or something. Look I've always had a good amount of friends and am personable, but- well it's a two way street who am I kidding.

I only answer known callers, which aren't terribly frequent. I like it that way.

Id answer the phone but i mean who calls these days

Ive a new manager, he seems fond of a weekly call i spose

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

voted I don't own a television because people do call me, some of the not-in-my-contacts calls are important, sometimes I answer. I don't always answer. Sometimes I like to talk to people. Sometimes I don't. I'm moody. My phone is almost always on silent. I look at it far too often. Sometimes I will turn it over so I don't see the screen. Sometimes I will leave it in the other room on purpose. ... it annoys me when people ask to "hop on a quick call" ... why don't you call me and see if I accept the call -- there's your answer! It's a dumb button on your phone. It's not even an actual button, it is a dot on a screen. If you give that much psychological power to a dot on a screen ... idk ... like, if you feel embarrassed you can always easily hand-wave it away (like literally -- waved the hand, accidentally hit the dot on the screen and it called a person) ... you can hit the other button that ends the call just as easily. Done.

The most annoying thing about the phone is that for a lot of my work, I am supposed to have things "in writing" or physically documented. and a phone call doesn't meet the criteria.

none of the choices fit my telephonic life, which is harnessed to a very idiosyncratic set of priorities that come fall out of a very strange set of circumstances.

Always answer, both landline and cell, unless it's obvious spam. Do you non-answerers not have kids? Any call could be from someone at their school, or (in the case of my kid who's in 5th grade and doesn't have a phone) a friend's parent, or whatever; I don't have every single possible such person in my contacts!

I generally only answer if they are in my contacts and I notice someone is calling (always on silent) and if I feel like talking (rare). I talk in meetings all day long via computer + headset and really that's plenty. My kids and siblings and other family members text. My mom has forgotten how to make outgoing calls which is fine.

I did answer a totally random call the other day, and surprised an actual person who was calling. It was...unsettling. Private investigation firm (!?) looking for heirs (!!??) of a childless great-aunt and uncle of mine. Very strange and I will never answer a random call again if I can help it.

?!?!

I *never* answer an unknown # unless I have reason to believe it is medical-appointment-related, which does happen and ya gotta answer cuz you can't call back

srsly Jaq that is just crazy enough to be real but I also wonder if they woulda left a voicemail?

Same here! Like, why dig to find me when there are 2 nieces in NC and many other great-nieces nephews (who have their original surnames still - mine has changed several times!). Very, very strange call to answer.

Obv none of my family members ever answer their phones and that woman has been calling us all non-stop since 2014

I thought this thread was saying the year 2020 is on the phone, do we answer.

why dig to find me when there are 2 nieces in NC and many other great-nieces nephews

aiui, if there are no named heirs and you are all equally closely related to that great-aunt, then it is the duty of the executor to attempt to locate every surviving heir and give them all equal shares, including you.

Yep and by answering that call, I can take on the executorship and that's a big nope.

I bought a house last year and spent a month answering the phone when it rang just in case it was a realtor or contractor or mortgage guy or whatever and it was awful.

xp exactly

I answer the phone when the caller is in my contacts, which happens frequently

I also don't bother to add people to my contacts that much, so often when a number comes in as a naked number it actually is someone I know.

The "silence unknown callers" option on the iPhone is the best thing to happen to phones since the rotary dial. NO interruptions ever from spammers. Unknown callers will still show up in missed calls so you can scan through them lest one of them is real. Also make use of the "i can't talk rn" text-back feature when I don't feel like talking or am on another call.

my phone is always on silent with no vibrate. I've had my current phone six months and I genuinely don't know what my ringtone is. I do enjoy receiving a voice note from someone but I think MSN Messenger has ruined me.

Phone tends to either ring beside me as I sit at the computer or ring and interrupt whatever podcast I'm listening to so not as easy to ignore as it might be.
BUt probably would ignore landline if I'm on other side of room unless I'm specifically expecting a call.

I did answer a totally random call the other day, and surprised an actual person who was calling. It was...unsettling. Private investigation firm (!?) looking for heirs (!!??) of a childless great-aunt and uncle of mine. Very strange and I will never answer a random call again if I can help it.

― Jaq, Tuesday, December 29, 2020 8:15 PM (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

Just to hop back on this topic for a quick second, my wife's late father's brother (who she never met) died a couple years back and we've been receiving calls and letters relating to his estate. A month back we received a huge packet in the mail containing a list of all confirmed surviving heirs (about 2 dozen) along with a list of the property involved in his estate, which turned out to be the proceeds from the sale of a trailer-home. I imagine that after taxes (and probably attorney's fees?) the distribution per heir will end up being pretty small.

Meanwhile, that packet contained not only the names of surviving heirs, but their contact info as well. It's fascinating from a genealogical standpoint because we really didn't know much about her dad's side and could potentially use the list as a basis for exploring that branch of her family tree. But one thing I was thinking was that if you happen to have issues with estrangement or anything like that in your family, there could be unintended consequences.

There was a TV programme in the UK which followed the people investigating unclaimed estates, Heir Hunters. It was about as depressing as you'd imagine it would be.

Do you non-answerers not have kids? Any call could be from someone at their school, or (in the case of my kid who's in 5th grade and doesn't have a phone) a friend's parent, or whatever; I don't have every single possible such person in my contacts!

I do sometimes wonder what would happen if I twisted my ankle while walking the dogs and needed my husband to come and get me and didn't have my phone on me, because I know he wouldn't answer his phone to an unknown number. He would look at a text, though, so I would text him from someone else's phone.

I did once lock myself out of our Airbnb in San Francisco, and had to go down the street to a shop and ask if I could use their computer to send my husband an email, because I couldn't remember his US phone number, and he certainly doesn't answer that one unless it's an existing contact.

yeah to eephus's point I pretty much answer all the time if my kid is not with me

I sometimes answer the phone even if the caller is not in my contacts, based on a complex decision tree that is not captured by your puny poll options.

if i'm texting with someone about some kind of simple plan or piece of information like what time to meet tomorrow or whose car to take or w/e and it takes more than 4 or 5 texts, I will almost always give up and call them, which is often shocking to the other person but idgaf. drives me nuts to have to go through some 45-minute back and forth where i have to keep picking my phone up and putting it down over and over in order to figure out something that could literally be settled in a 10-second conversation.

I do sometimes wonder what would happen if I twisted my ankle while walking the dogs and needed my husband to come and get me and didn't have my phone on me

this very thing happened to me a few months back, I had no option but to limp slowly and painfully home.

I remember missing the last bus home when i lived in Tallahassee and walking two hours home on more than one occasion

I produced a sports talk radio show for 11 years, answering the phone at least 70 times a day, five days a week.

I will never enjoy picking up a ringing phone, land or mobile, ever again.

One thing which made a surprising difference to my smouldering phone resentment was putting it on speaker and sitting it on a nearby table. I'm absolutely happy to chat while I'm doing something else as well, it's the enforced total attention / loss of a hand which really amplifies my rage.

I'm not a fan of picking up the phone but I don't actually mind phone conversations once I'm having them. Give me a phone conversation over a Zoom/Teams/FaceTime chat ANY day.

I pick it up reluctantly

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

I voted in the winning category, but I actually answer the phone pretty often because I get food delivered a lot and the delivery person calls to let me know they're at the front door/pulling up the driveway.

I produced a sports talk radio show for 11 years, answering the phone at least 70 times a day, five days a week.

I will never enjoy picking up a ringing phone, land or mobile, ever again.

― pplains, Wednesday, December 30, 2020 9:37 AM (yesterday)

I can relate lol (food service, then radio, then club management) ... though from that I gained the ability to expedite calls ... do you want the pizza on special? Caller #2, sorry, you didn't win. No, the show hasn't started yet and we're on 23rd STREET not 23rd AVENUE, GET BACK ON THE FREEWAY HEADING NORTH