Obi-Wan Kenobi, of Tattooine became one with the force last Sunday, after reaching the age of 57 years old. After years of exile, he died from injuries related to a light saber strike on a remote planetary satellite. There are currently no details as to the nature of the accident or why he was present at this location.
Obi-Wan was born 57 years ago on the planet Stewjohn to Marvella Kenobi and Alan Kenobi. As a boy he was selected as a Padawan and underwent Jedi training with Grand Master Yoda.
Obi-Wan became a Jedi master and fought in the Clone Wars, retiring from service on Tattooine after the fall of the Galactic Republic.
Obi-Wan is survived by children, Kyle Kenobi, and Tangenia Kenobi, and 3 grandchildren (Shaveen Dustmite, Margolis Kenobi-Schwartz, Dane Licepocket, and Karl Kenobi)
A memorial service will be held when the body is located.
― Looking for Cape Penis house (Neanderthal), Friday, 25 December 2020 15:42 (four years ago) link
On 25th inst we printed an obituary for Tiny Tim Cratchit- we wish to advise that Tiny Tim is in fact alive and well and expects many more years of health and happiness- as many, we pray, as any man in good old England.
― spruce springclean (darraghmac), Friday, 25 December 2020 17:04 (four years ago) link
Henchman 3, age 38, succumbed to injuries sustained in a police-involved shooting. He is survived by his mother, Onlooker Woman, and two brothers, Maintenance Worker 1 and Truck Driver.
― sarahell, Saturday, 26 December 2020 19:21 (four years ago) link
Oroku Saki (小禄 咲), otherwise known to friends as Master Shredder, was killed Saturday evening in an unfortunate construction accident, after leaving a Vanilla Ice concert.
He is survived by several anthropomorphic monsters, and several foot soldiers.
― Looking for Cape Penis house (Neanderthal), Saturday, 26 December 2020 21:13 (four years ago) link