thread for KING CHARLES III (regnal name george vii)

it's time fellow subjects

gnna kick off with this: https://travelmakertours.com/why-prince-charles-considers-transylvania-his-second-home/

This is how it's gonna go - A prophecy upon CHARLES the Third, and two Kings after him (1661)

"Since oor true king was sent awa'.
A doited German rules us all"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g7y6rekD7cY

Signalling at an aide through clenched teeth to move something out of his way pic.twitter.com/SSe8j8VeUz

— Emma Devlin (@theactualemma) September 10, 2022

wait i thought his regnal name was charles iii i’m confused

this is one of literally dozens of hills i am setting up to die on currently

suspect that elderly tantrum-boy here is gnna turn out to be very bad at a lot of similar things the recently departed was in fact better at

― mark s, Saturday, 10 September 2022 16:38 (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

Yeah, I think that's he'll be a force for republicanism in form and content! If he carks it in the next week and we move smoothly on to William the Bald, the window will have closed.

AIUI, bumping off Andrew is now his job, Harry is William's problem but can still be attempted while William is the Prince of Wales.

The lipless equine grimace is so quintessential

a deeply ugly man indeed

The whole succession process being televised has been a great advert for republicanism. The more people see of the behind-closed-doors workings of the royals and their intersection with government, the more they'll want rid of the whole lot.

pic.twitter.com/piuD2NQ6LH

— HappyToast ★ (@IamHappyToast) September 11, 2022

I saw that King Charles addressed a compliant Parliament today.

A week or two ago I went round Oliver Cromwell's house in Ely. I am aware that the events of the 1640s are controversial but I wonder how far we have progressed in coming from executing King Charles I and establishing a republic, to Parliament abasing itself before King Charles III.

went there once when I lived in Ely in 2016/2017, enjoyed the bedroom at the end which is "haunted" by some concealed lighting & speakers and a device which makes the bed move slightly.

A week or two ago I went round Oliver Cromwell's house in Ely.

Was he in?

"Yeah, I think that's he'll be a force for republicanism in form and content! If he carks it in the next week and we move smoothly on to William the Bald, the window will have closed."

Where is the assumption that William might be better coming from?

The Prince of Wales

Yes, I don't see it at all. How is he in any way better? Nothing I have seen goes beyond the utterly superficial and ephemeral...he is young and has an attractive young wife. Oh, and he occasionally speaks vaguely like the people we converse with on a day-to-day basis, in Estuary English, rather than in an antiquated upper class way to rhyme 'home' with 'game' and 'perhaps' with 'crepes'.

Like, hello? People with normal accents, young people and attractive people can still hold (C/c)onservative views.

Other than that, it is just the MSM editorialising by linking anything vaguely charitable he does or says with the "caring nature of his late mother".

William is much more agreeable for most actual Royalists who think Charles is too much a weird boat-rocking hippie (think Farage and the like) plus that William has always felt to them more Diana's son than Chuck's.

William's statements are usually about conservation, climate change & mental health, which is a bit more palatable than architecture and alternative medicine.

he is young and has an attractive young wife.

He's 40. Charles has got increasingly crankier and unpleasant as he's got older - not that he was ever not cranky and unpleasant - I fully expect William to go the same way.

My wife and I (both Americans, FTR) discussed this weekend the idea that maybe it would be a good thing if Chuck were to say "Fuck this shit, I'm the king, I'm gonna be the fucking king" and rescind your new prime minister's position, dissolve Parliament by royal edict, and turn your little island back into an absolute monarchy. I mean, how much worse could he shit the bed than your last three leaders have done? And before you say "constitutionally, he can't" I say that it would be highly amusing for the prime minister and Parliament to be forced to deploy the military against a rebel king, and I genuinely wonder which side the population would land on.

Don't 'your little island' us you cheese-murdering ingra---ahaha I mean why yes that would be splendid good sir.

Population would side w/ the military, as they would not want to get shot.

But of course Charles also has zero motivation to embark on this fantasy scenario - why would he want the headaches of ruling, he's got the royal veto to maintain the family fortune and that's all that really matters.

"My wife and I (both Americans, FTR) discussed this weekend the idea that maybe it would be a good thing if Chuck were to say "Fuck this shit, I'm the king, I'm gonna be the fucking king" and rescind your new prime minister's position, dissolve Parliament by royal edict, and turn your little island back into an absolute monarchy."

I hope you were both really drunk during this convo.

its not really that small of an island, ranks in the top ten biggest iirc

You can still indulge in silly speculation while sober, xyzzz. Ain't against the rules.

He's 40.

That's still 'young' in terms of the mean & possibly also median age of the UK populace, Tom D., and also in the eyes of the Tory-voting, Countryside Alliance supporting, on-shore wind vetoing, curtain-twitching types who are the only people the govt/MSM care about the opinion of these days.

btw ppl saying in his defense that charles is an environmentalist i assume its just some neoliberalfeudal bs but i havent looked into it

environmentalist in the organic-farming-and-maintainance-of-parks sense.

well parks are nice

his type environmentalism is like Attenborough's, all about eugenics and thinning out the population - "they breed like rats". He talks a lot about food waste while his servant ends up boiling 43 eggs if he decides on a whim to go on a 3 hour morning walk.

lol perfect

Did unperson divorce his curvy Colombian wife or did she just pick up his shitty sense of humour along with her citizenship application

How about a revolution instead

Sky News just challenged the public to overthrow the monarchy pic.twitter.com/QyAiceIDVk

— Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) September 12, 2022

xp

"You can still indulge in silly speculation while sober, xyzzz. Ain't against the rules."

Sounded like the kind of chat you'd be saying while drunk or brain dead.

Sounded like the kind of chat you'd be saying while drunk or brain dead.

...if you lacked an imagination, maybe! :-P

Where is the assumption that William might be better coming from?

William seems to more capable of following his grandmother's example of never saying or doing anything interesting in public ever, and therefore remaining a popular 'apolitical' figure. Some of the royal reportage in Private Eye painted him as quite a ruthless and effective operator behind the scenes, as opposed to Charles who dithers and equivocates, e.g. they credited William with making sure that Andrew was fully cast out into the wilderness when the Queen was more inclined to be forgiving.

the uk press have been sitting on stories about will's alleged infidelity for years now, so wills' ramrod compliance may be lubricated by a fear of being thrust onto tabloid front pages under straplines about his bedroom preferences

Yeah seems like a bit of a shoogly peg for the institution

sad to see royalty forced into a prostate position like that

A far cry from the previously dominant position.

i think he's just really anal about details

just a square peg in a round hole I guess

I confess that this american is (with some guilt) delighted with the lol opportunities presented by KCIII. Sorry, UK, really I am, but also good god the tragicomedy. . .

I mean we gave you Trump (also sorry about that), surely it was your turn.

tabloid features from the 80s make the best heads of state, trust us

lol i fucking told you

'Judging the right moment for a joke is always tricky...'

My latest cartoon for tomorrow's @Telegraph

Subscribe to my weekly newsletter to receive my unseen cartoons: https://t.co/JNDhrYJMFH pic.twitter.com/AhAJmld9TB

— Matt Cartoons (@MattCartoonist) September 12, 2022

that's the power you wield when you are the UK's richest sketcher of cock-noses

nashwan otm, William will be more palatable to the average subject (because he is more palatable to the papers, as evidence: the last decade of papers)

move fast! break things!

King Charles’s staff given redundancy notice during church service for Queen

Exclusive by ⁦@PippaCrerar⁩ and ⁦@ccdavies⁩ https://t.co/nAcSngcBAI

— Owen Gibson (@owen_g) September 13, 2022

psyched for some wild stories from disgruntled former employees

this man hates pens

How is this real? How is this public?! pic.twitter.com/dZlsNOVREI

— Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) September 13, 2022

stuff about a guy hiding in the wardrobe makes more sense now

'suspicions of misconduct' makes it sound like he cheated at darts

sadly I hear the average prison sentences for misconduct in office are 2 - 4 years and it's very difficult for the prosecution to prove the wilful elements of the charge in court.

released under investigation

well aren't they more concerned about the sharing of trade info with Epstein than the actual sex crimes?

That's all they're concerned about.

they can make a song and dance about nobody being above the law while he gets away scot free withy his most serious crimes.

Sandringham Estate is gonna end up like Fred West’s house on 25 Cromwell Street, Gloucester isn’t it because I almost completely forgot about this but now… *leopointinggif* https://t.co/MJNohRl2Hp

— Congolesa Rice (@judeinlondon) February 19, 2026

This pic

🚨 BREAKING: Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor has been pictured leaving Aylsham police station pic.twitter.com/PiqS5Z3nEn

— Politics UK (@PolitlcsUK) February 19, 2026

Sorry just saw Calzino posted

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/ed/The-Queen-is-Dead-cover.png

Just as well really, this would have killed her off.

Some "lizard people" energy going on in that photo.

Disappointing he's going down on misconduct in office charges, which will probably get him a suspended sentence or something, rather than the billion years he'd get for raping minors. Chalk this up as another win for the royal family.

why does he look like E L Wisty in that photograph

just cause hes not currently charged for pedo stuff doesnt mean he wont be, not trying to downplay the corruption and whatnot, but being investigated for your dealings with the leader of a pedo ring is not the most protected situation from pedo charges, all things being equal youd rather not be dealing with the police here

Some "lizard people" energy going on in that photo

yeah, looks like he's about to emerge from his humanoid carapace

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/HBjM5YmXsAAOV_p?format=jpg&name=small

the last famous person you were surprised to discover was actually still alive

the last pointless person you were surprised to discover was actually still alive

people you were surprised to find out were still undead

to quote the Orange Paedo :"it's a very sad thing"

Witchell looks like he has emerged from the ocean's depths after a thousand years, like a very respectful and kow-towing coelecanth

he sleeps in the late queen's coffin and only emerges at night to go on bbc news

they fished him out of that suffolk ditch eh

andrew's automotive stricken rictus reminded me of his dear old dad

https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/NINTCHDBPICT000549781629.jpg?strip=all&w=960

goddamn that photo's a jump scare

Its true, we're lame

Deeply fascinated by this distinctively British genre of photography pic.twitter.com/CbKoPZYrUy

— affe (@alfosn) February 20, 2026

Crying Thatcher too

it's just the standard paparazzi aesthetic filtered through dark dismal British evenings and with the distinctively English ghoulish ugliness of the UK elites

lol

This Price Andrew song getting sung in the Cavern, Liverpool is a belter 😂

“He’s a a sweaty nonse” 🎶 pic.twitter.com/522oMqmnBi

— Paul🥷 (@l4pablo) February 20, 2026

Dying at that, lol.

Clearly the best band to ever perform in the Cavern Club.

without a doubt!

https://bsky.app/profile/plasmatron.bsky.social/post/3mfauedbe5k2z

Former Royal Protection Officer Paul Page @PaulPag46852754 relates that Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor's formal code was "Purple Four One". However the police had an informal police code word for him (Source: 60 Minutes) pic.twitter.com/yznfUO8Aim

— Max DeLargo (@banthebbc) February 20, 2026

nearly choked on my coffee listening to this!

#realengland

I thought there may be a code of silence among the protection officers which would protect Andrew. After seeing this I’m sure they’ll be happy to dish the dirt.

They do turn a blind eye to vices, verified by someone whose close protection officers ignored but were happy to facilitate huge amounts of shagging around, who joked about it in a FB thread started by one of my friends (who knows the person well). It was shocking to read at the time!

I'm good friends with a guy who was a protection officer - Salman Rushdie was his main claim to fame - he certainly has no code of silence in the pub after a few jars!

Everyone needs to vent about work, especially when your principal is throwing you under the bus on some other writer’s FB.

Andrew's nickname could equally have been applied to the author of The Satanic Verses... or so I've been told. My friend's main problem with Rushdie though was that he thought he was a shit writer!

Randy Salman gives WWE vibes tho. Fatwah Man Randy Salman.

No, not that one, the one in the video.

Ah I see!

i feel like they should bump him up the order of succession. "Andrew the Cunt" is a proper old school Carolingian king name

Andrew's nickname could equally have been applied to the author of The Satanic Verses... or so I've been told. My friend's main problem with Rushdie though was that he thought he was a shit writer!

Invite him to our next ILB meet up please

Any move to remove him from the line of succession will need buy-in from the other 14 countries that have Charles as their monarch - you'd hope that a few of them would take the opportunity to slough the whole thing off.

As a Canadian I heartily endorse this line of thinking.