thread for KING CHARLES III (regnal name george vii)

it's time fellow subjects

gnna kick off with this: https://travelmakertours.com/why-prince-charles-considers-transylvania-his-second-home/

This is how it's gonna go - A prophecy upon CHARLES the Third, and two Kings after him (1661)

"Since oor true king was sent awa'.
A doited German rules us all"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g7y6rekD7cY

Signalling at an aide through clenched teeth to move something out of his way pic.twitter.com/SSe8j8VeUz

— Emma Devlin (@theactualemma) September 10, 2022

wait i thought his regnal name was charles iii i’m confused

this is one of literally dozens of hills i am setting up to die on currently

suspect that elderly tantrum-boy here is gnna turn out to be very bad at a lot of similar things the recently departed was in fact better at

― mark s, Saturday, 10 September 2022 16:38 (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

Yeah, I think that's he'll be a force for republicanism in form and content! If he carks it in the next week and we move smoothly on to William the Bald, the window will have closed.

AIUI, bumping off Andrew is now his job, Harry is William's problem but can still be attempted while William is the Prince of Wales.

The lipless equine grimace is so quintessential

a deeply ugly man indeed

The whole succession process being televised has been a great advert for republicanism. The more people see of the behind-closed-doors workings of the royals and their intersection with government, the more they'll want rid of the whole lot.

pic.twitter.com/piuD2NQ6LH

— HappyToast ★ (@IamHappyToast) September 11, 2022

I saw that King Charles addressed a compliant Parliament today.

A week or two ago I went round Oliver Cromwell's house in Ely. I am aware that the events of the 1640s are controversial but I wonder how far we have progressed in coming from executing King Charles I and establishing a republic, to Parliament abasing itself before King Charles III.

went there once when I lived in Ely in 2016/2017, enjoyed the bedroom at the end which is "haunted" by some concealed lighting & speakers and a device which makes the bed move slightly.

A week or two ago I went round Oliver Cromwell's house in Ely.

Was he in?

"Yeah, I think that's he'll be a force for republicanism in form and content! If he carks it in the next week and we move smoothly on to William the Bald, the window will have closed."

Where is the assumption that William might be better coming from?

The Prince of Wales

Yes, I don't see it at all. How is he in any way better? Nothing I have seen goes beyond the utterly superficial and ephemeral...he is young and has an attractive young wife. Oh, and he occasionally speaks vaguely like the people we converse with on a day-to-day basis, in Estuary English, rather than in an antiquated upper class way to rhyme 'home' with 'game' and 'perhaps' with 'crepes'.

Like, hello? People with normal accents, young people and attractive people can still hold (C/c)onservative views.

Other than that, it is just the MSM editorialising by linking anything vaguely charitable he does or says with the "caring nature of his late mother".

William is much more agreeable for most actual Royalists who think Charles is too much a weird boat-rocking hippie (think Farage and the like) plus that William has always felt to them more Diana's son than Chuck's.

William's statements are usually about conservation, climate change & mental health, which is a bit more palatable than architecture and alternative medicine.

he is young and has an attractive young wife.

He's 40. Charles has got increasingly crankier and unpleasant as he's got older - not that he was ever not cranky and unpleasant - I fully expect William to go the same way.

My wife and I (both Americans, FTR) discussed this weekend the idea that maybe it would be a good thing if Chuck were to say "Fuck this shit, I'm the king, I'm gonna be the fucking king" and rescind your new prime minister's position, dissolve Parliament by royal edict, and turn your little island back into an absolute monarchy. I mean, how much worse could he shit the bed than your last three leaders have done? And before you say "constitutionally, he can't" I say that it would be highly amusing for the prime minister and Parliament to be forced to deploy the military against a rebel king, and I genuinely wonder which side the population would land on.

Don't 'your little island' us you cheese-murdering ingra---ahaha I mean why yes that would be splendid good sir.

Population would side w/ the military, as they would not want to get shot.

But of course Charles also has zero motivation to embark on this fantasy scenario - why would he want the headaches of ruling, he's got the royal veto to maintain the family fortune and that's all that really matters.

"My wife and I (both Americans, FTR) discussed this weekend the idea that maybe it would be a good thing if Chuck were to say "Fuck this shit, I'm the king, I'm gonna be the fucking king" and rescind your new prime minister's position, dissolve Parliament by royal edict, and turn your little island back into an absolute monarchy."

I hope you were both really drunk during this convo.

its not really that small of an island, ranks in the top ten biggest iirc

You can still indulge in silly speculation while sober, xyzzz. Ain't against the rules.

He's 40.

That's still 'young' in terms of the mean & possibly also median age of the UK populace, Tom D., and also in the eyes of the Tory-voting, Countryside Alliance supporting, on-shore wind vetoing, curtain-twitching types who are the only people the govt/MSM care about the opinion of these days.

btw ppl saying in his defense that charles is an environmentalist i assume its just some neoliberalfeudal bs but i havent looked into it

environmentalist in the organic-farming-and-maintainance-of-parks sense.

well parks are nice

his type environmentalism is like Attenborough's, all about eugenics and thinning out the population - "they breed like rats". He talks a lot about food waste while his servant ends up boiling 43 eggs if he decides on a whim to go on a 3 hour morning walk.

lol perfect

Did unperson divorce his curvy Colombian wife or did she just pick up his shitty sense of humour along with her citizenship application

How about a revolution instead

Sky News just challenged the public to overthrow the monarchy pic.twitter.com/QyAiceIDVk

— Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) September 12, 2022

xp

"You can still indulge in silly speculation while sober, xyzzz. Ain't against the rules."

Sounded like the kind of chat you'd be saying while drunk or brain dead.

Sounded like the kind of chat you'd be saying while drunk or brain dead.

...if you lacked an imagination, maybe! :-P

Where is the assumption that William might be better coming from?

William seems to more capable of following his grandmother's example of never saying or doing anything interesting in public ever, and therefore remaining a popular 'apolitical' figure. Some of the royal reportage in Private Eye painted him as quite a ruthless and effective operator behind the scenes, as opposed to Charles who dithers and equivocates, e.g. they credited William with making sure that Andrew was fully cast out into the wilderness when the Queen was more inclined to be forgiving.

the uk press have been sitting on stories about will's alleged infidelity for years now, so wills' ramrod compliance may be lubricated by a fear of being thrust onto tabloid front pages under straplines about his bedroom preferences

Yeah seems like a bit of a shoogly peg for the institution

sad to see royalty forced into a prostate position like that

A far cry from the previously dominant position.

i think he's just really anal about details

just a square peg in a round hole I guess

I confess that this american is (with some guilt) delighted with the lol opportunities presented by KCIII. Sorry, UK, really I am, but also good god the tragicomedy. . .

I mean we gave you Trump (also sorry about that), surely it was your turn.

tabloid features from the 80s make the best heads of state, trust us

lol i fucking told you

'Judging the right moment for a joke is always tricky...'

My latest cartoon for tomorrow's @Telegraph

Subscribe to my weekly newsletter to receive my unseen cartoons: https://t.co/JNDhrYJMFH pic.twitter.com/AhAJmld9TB

— Matt Cartoons (@MattCartoonist) September 12, 2022

that's the power you wield when you are the UK's richest sketcher of cock-noses

nashwan otm, William will be more palatable to the average subject (because he is more palatable to the papers, as evidence: the last decade of papers)

move fast! break things!

King Charles’s staff given redundancy notice during church service for Queen

Exclusive by ⁦@PippaCrerar⁩ and ⁦@ccdavies⁩ https://t.co/nAcSngcBAI

— Owen Gibson (@owen_g) September 13, 2022

psyched for some wild stories from disgruntled former employees

this man hates pens

How is this real? How is this public?! pic.twitter.com/dZlsNOVREI

— Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) September 13, 2022

to quote the Orange Paedo :"it's a very sad thing"

Witchell looks like he has emerged from the ocean's depths after a thousand years, like a very respectful and kow-towing coelecanth

he sleeps in the late queen's coffin and only emerges at night to go on bbc news

they fished him out of that suffolk ditch eh

andrew's automotive stricken rictus reminded me of his dear old dad

https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/NINTCHDBPICT000549781629.jpg?strip=all&w=960

goddamn that photo's a jump scare

Its true, we're lame

Deeply fascinated by this distinctively British genre of photography pic.twitter.com/CbKoPZYrUy

— affe (@alfosn) February 20, 2026

Crying Thatcher too

it's just the standard paparazzi aesthetic filtered through dark dismal British evenings and with the distinctively English ghoulish ugliness of the UK elites

lol

This Price Andrew song getting sung in the Cavern, Liverpool is a belter 😂

“He’s a a sweaty nonse” 🎶 pic.twitter.com/522oMqmnBi

— Paul🥷 (@l4pablo) February 20, 2026

Dying at that, lol.

Clearly the best band to ever perform in the Cavern Club.

without a doubt!

https://bsky.app/profile/plasmatron.bsky.social/post/3mfauedbe5k2z

Former Royal Protection Officer Paul Page @PaulPag46852754 relates that Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor's formal code was "Purple Four One". However the police had an informal police code word for him (Source: 60 Minutes) pic.twitter.com/yznfUO8Aim

— Max DeLargo (@banthebbc) February 20, 2026

nearly choked on my coffee listening to this!

#realengland

I thought there may be a code of silence among the protection officers which would protect Andrew. After seeing this I’m sure they’ll be happy to dish the dirt.

They do turn a blind eye to vices, verified by someone whose close protection officers ignored but were happy to facilitate huge amounts of shagging around, who joked about it in a FB thread started by one of my friends (who knows the person well). It was shocking to read at the time!

I'm good friends with a guy who was a protection officer - Salman Rushdie was his main claim to fame - he certainly has no code of silence in the pub after a few jars!

Everyone needs to vent about work, especially when your principal is throwing you under the bus on some other writer’s FB.

Andrew's nickname could equally have been applied to the author of The Satanic Verses... or so I've been told. My friend's main problem with Rushdie though was that he thought he was a shit writer!

Randy Salman gives WWE vibes tho. Fatwah Man Randy Salman.

No, not that one, the one in the video.

Ah I see!

i feel like they should bump him up the order of succession. "Andrew the Cunt" is a proper old school Carolingian king name

Andrew's nickname could equally have been applied to the author of The Satanic Verses... or so I've been told. My friend's main problem with Rushdie though was that he thought he was a shit writer!

Invite him to our next ILB meet up please

Any move to remove him from the line of succession will need buy-in from the other 14 countries that have Charles as their monarch - you'd hope that a few of them would take the opportunity to slough the whole thing off.

As a Canadian I heartily endorse this line of thinking.

Is the Bermuda Triangle still a thing?

🇬🇧🇺🇸 On advice of His Majesty’s Government, and at the invitation of The President of the United States, The King and Queen will undertake a State Visit to the United States of America. Their Majesties’ programme will celebrate the historic connections and the modern bilateral… pic.twitter.com/DY1CltXzVo

— The Royal Family (@RoyalFamily) March 31, 2026

also: No Kings -> invites a king

@ ICE : these people don't have passports, do your thing

xxpost
very much a thing in UFO circles, where it has evolved to be a giant undersea alien factory that constructs UFOs & crews them with biological robots that it grows, the "greys". if you get anywhere near it, it destroys you with special alien tech!

This royal reptilian visit would be a great time for them to reveal themselves then

Charles, of course, has been playing the diplomatic game for decades. He knows how soft words turn away wrath and, having met Trump several times on the president’s British visits, he also knows how to flatter him, which appears to be the way to his simple heart. Elizabeth II was a past mistress of distraction, remaining purse-lipped, or rooting about for something in her handbag if things were getting really sticky.

https://www.theguardian.com/news/ng-interactive/2026/apr/04/can-the-king-tame-trump-state-visit

amazing stuff wow we really don't pay them enough bring back the divine right

It's hilarious the queen would do that though. Kind of Columbo-esque.

She can table a meeting, she can root about in her handbag.

the handbag was much more than that - https://royalcentral.co.uk/uk/queen/the-queens-secret-handbag-code-77573/

He's alive, despite what Radio Caroline accidentally announced (before the technician ran away, leading to 16 minutes of silence)

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/king-charles-death-radio-caroline-announcement-b3030359.html

Didn’t realise Radio Caroline was still going.

clearly an attempt to fracture and seize power of the Carolingian dynasty

The media regulator said it had received two complaints about the broadcast, and a further 563 complaints when it turned out the cunt was still alive.

Camilla has done an interview about the impact of the cancer diagnosis on her, and H&M are moving back to the UK. Are we being prepared for something? William V by the end of the year?

Do we still do dead pools? Who's got Chuck?

Charles OTM

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2026/sep/16/earl-spencer-memoir-prince-charles-diana-death-claims

This is horrible writing:

It was during the ensuing argument between the two men that Charles allegedly made the comment, with Spencer reportedly writing: “Rest assured,” he hissed, “we’ll forget her soon enough!’”

Worth it tho for this magnificent bit of nastiness at the end:

A Buckingham Palace spokesperson said: “While we do not comment on books as a matter of principle, His Majesty is mindful that the pain of fraternal grief can cloud reason, affect judgment and colour memory in ways others do not recognise, even many years after such a loss.”

How’s YOUR brother, Chuckie?

an exciting day for fans of not giving a fuck

what an evil man