relationships:great or bleh

I hate relationships really, they're stupid.

Tracer is right on - it's a full-time job. The minute you simply rely on the sparks & charm to do their work without investing any other energy, it's over. And if you're in a relationship just because you're bored & lonely, then you should really start doing drugs or banging your head with a ballpeen hammer. You know, something CONSTRUCTIVE.

The only way to figure this stuff out, though, is through trial & error, something (personally) I'm totally unwilling to do (having been tried once, and found in contempt, even after a year). Godspeed to all you romantics/suckers out there playing the field. And more blessing to you wacky kids currently in relationships, slugging it out & making it work.

I think this thread should mutate into "Ally Drunk: Classic or Dud?" cos I ain't never saying that otherwise.

However, then I met someone who was just as down on the concept of relationships as I was, and just as cynical and misanthropic as I was. And then somehow, mysteriously, we've turned into the ultimate couple from hell. Please explain how that happened to us...

I guess it is kind of fairy tale when you think about it. Never believed in that crap before.

Bill

Object = TV, obviously.

"I do my thing, and you do your thing, I am not in this world to live up to your expectations, And you are not in this world to live up to mine. You are you, and I am I, And if by chance we meet, it's beautiful. If not, it can't be helped." (Fritz Perls)

"'He no longer loves the person he loved ten years ago.' I quite believe it: she is not the same any more, nor is he. He was young and so was she; now, she is quite different. Perhaps he would still love her as she used to be then..." (Blaise Pascal)

Oh wait, yes I am. I've been with the same person for the better part of a decade (discounting one year hiatus) and it's definitely worth the trouble. We're not just in a relationship. We're co-conspirators. It's the coolest thing.

"Those grapes were sour, anyway," said the fox to himself as he sloped off...

About incorrigible romantics: do you think that rampant romanticism leads to a sort of perfectionism when it comes to love/relationships which therefore leads to disappointment when grubby reality gets in the way?

do you think that rampant romanticism leads to a sort of perfectionism when it comes to love/relationships which therefore leads to disappointment when grubby reality gets in the way?

Well, duh! Of course!

(Boy will I regret this second bottle of wine when I wake up.)

Hey - maybe he's off somewhere having a Relationship.

Then my roommate starts up again and it all makes me want to kill myself.

I'm just exhausted sorry.

Human Relationships 2010

[5:49:27 PM] Girl: no its not that its just i been really thinking like ive been looking at everything ..and myself an like my feeling have changed
[5:49:34 PM] Boy: what do you mean?
[5:49:40 PM] Boy: are you mad at me>
[5:50:45 PM] Girl: no noel im not mad at you ..i just dont no if i love you anymore..i no this is out of the blue but ive been thinkin for weeks and i dont no what to do because im confused and i dont wanna upset you but i cant keep thinking about it cos its driving me mad
[5:51:05 PM] Boy: ............
[5:51:12 PM] Boy: are you trolling me?
[5:51:21 PM] Girl: no for once [boy] im

not
[5:51:32 PM] Boy: im all for trolling but like this week wouldnt be a good week for it

i think i function better with another person in my life, a s.o. i know that i am really annoying, i annoy myself, anyway, so it's tough i guess. having difficult wknd bad sunday experience. yah i feel really alone and all of this energy gets channeled in the wrong directions.

had a chat with an ex-girlfriend last night out of nowhere she was like "you were the most interesting person i ever dated", which is weird to hear from someone who is married with children. in itself, does not pay the rent or deliver me oxytocin, netflix style. yeh so i dunno. it's just tough to be sometimes, regardless of whether you are with yr dreamboat i guess

I've unwittingly found myself in a LDR. Wha happen'd?

i guess you guys appreciate each other

I was once an incurable LDR addict. I loved 'em. I loathed 'em sometimes too, but I seemed to repeatedly fall into long distance relationships, well 3 different times anyway, however unworkable they may have been. There's an indescribable rush in the few days preceding a visit to a long-distance significant other - no matter how badly things were going at home, the immediate future looked bright. Suitcases and airline tickets took on an aphrodisiac quality.

Of course, as with all highs, you inevitably come crashing down on the long, lonely flight or drive home, as the realization hits that it will be another six weeks before I see her again. In many ways, I think LDRs work *because* we couldn't see each other very often, and our rare moments together became all the more precious.

Be careful though - LDRs can get really expensive unless one or both of your jobs pay for your travel.

Lord knows I embarrassingly filled up several dating advice threads on this board going on about my relationship foibles.

Weirdly, I'm on the other end of the spectrum now. Only like 4-5 years ago, I felt empty if I wasn't in a relationship and tended to be a bad choice of partners as I'd often date anybody who was willing to have me.

Now I don't feel like dating anybody and prefer the existence I've eked out. I'm extremely social and hang around people all the time, but anything romantic (even things that don't require commitment like sex/makeout sessions), I've tended to avoid as I tend to be overly cautious.

Right now, I have someone who is trying to get me to go out with them, but I have a variety of reasons why I won't. Idk...I like sex and even being a romantic but I feel like I lost the ability to do it?

not even a *bad* thing really, just a weird one!