Let's Liveblog The Trump Inauguration Without Actually Watching It.

I think it's a classy touch to have the Village People sing "Thank Heaven For Little Girls" as everyone walks in. Very European. Maybe its a nod to NATO.

Why are BBC and ITV showing this garbage live for two fucking hours?

Is that...yeah, I think that is Satan masturbating in the back corner...nice hat. Wait, no, it might be Sean Spicer.

By god that’s Luigi mangione’s music

That table that Mike Pence is tied to and on top of next to the ceremonial knives is gorgeous. Crate & Barrel?

Steve Bannon wearing ONLY a codpiece is pretty daring. I know that they aren't outside but it still must be pretty chilly in there! That Goebbels back tattoo came out great. He should tweet who did the work.

I'm told Melania's hat is now hovering freely high over Capitol Hill.

it's nice to see the glowing orb make an appearance again

The head of Dick Cheney and the head of Liz Cheney on each side of the throne...a bit much? They are displayed wonderfully though. I detect Melania's handiwork in their placement. She always does things with such pizazz.

I understand why Joe Biden was chained head to toe. But the Leia slave bikini is tasteless even by Trump standards.

It's nice to see all the Democratic lawmakers sitting so quietly. It wouldn't be proper to yell something out like "Liar"! or "Rapist"! or "Racist"! Remember, when they go low you go...oh snap I went to go get my bag of Bugles and they have already been killed and added to the official Pile of Infidels. I thought they were waiting for the finale to do that. I read that the Pile of Infidels will be left outside the U.S. Capitol until their bones are picked clean. A nice tip of the hat to Nepal now that we know that Elon wants to buy it from China and make it a crypto farm.

Is Mike Pence really there lmao

Can't believe they got Post Malone to do a duet with Stephen Miller. He's everywhere.

By god that’s Luigi mangione’s music

― Sir Kock Farmer (wins)

lol

Who let the dogs out?

“….and now on to the liars”

Just hope no one nods off or they’ll be in danger of getting hit in the head by those Big Macs they’re shooting out into the crowd with t-shirt cannons

Seeing the QAnon Shaman sitting next to Harvey Weinstein and Mario Batali was such a treat! Can you say star-studded?

Choosing to deport all immigrants except the Curvy Latinas of TikTok has inspired quite the standing o.

We split the atom...and I came back against the odds!

i found the perfect recipe to honor the great man at dinner tonight.

https://scontent-bos5-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/474637614_10162792997997137_841860870436699498_n.jpg?_nc_cat=103&ccb=1-7&_nc_sid=127cfc&_nc_ohc=ppw8apyaYKQQ7kNvgHetoSO&_nc_zt=23&_nc_ht=scontent-bos5-1.xx&_nc_gid=Au8vmYN2Tv1NSxlliCgAX5P&oh=00_AYBWdnVZx9St7ShQsyYfS7jBg1zHG0rJlZSYSLu02AfiCQ&oe=67947642

Lol the audio is lost?

https://theonion.com/jd-vance-sworn-in-on-stack-of-printed-4chan-greentexts/

Trump's afterparty speech/press conference shows a clear Dave Chappelle influence as Trump is speaking freely with Mark Zuckerberg shoved down the front of his pants.

I thought it was cool when he said that tomorrow he would be embarking on a solo (!!!) cruise around the world on a 20-foot boat with absolutely no contact with the outside world and would be leaving affairs of state up to the ghost of dead alt-right social media star Peanut the Squirrel who would be contacted via a Ouija Board operated by Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi.

https://www.newyorkupstate.com/resizer/v2/PB36LPJQ7FEVDMDTYEZUOWCZAM.jpg?auth=8cbb2426a23deec4ccfb3a877baf010be64b548c3a5c191c2ba6e7aa5749e4ba&width=500&quality=90

Germans eh?

https://www.theguardian.com/news/2025/jan/30/israel-and-the-delusions-of-germanys-memory-culture

... oops, wrong thread, bloody phone.