ivy thread. thread for asking ivy questions or sharing cool art with her. not about the plant

hi

there are like two threads about me on ilx both under my deadname, figured i should just start a new one. i'll prob share my published writing here as well (coming soon, a zine)

hi!

how are feeling

not a question, but looking forward to your writing.

Ooooh this is a promising thread. Hi ivy!

how are feeling

― the talented mr pimply (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, February 18, 2025 11:46 AM (fifteen minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

just about the saddest i've ever felt, trying to work on my zine anyway, even though it is about the very thing that is making me sad now

Apologies if this isn’t wanted but it’s brought me some joy this past weekend

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FtbEIMAsBsY

what kinds of cool art are you interested in seeing?

and i'm sorry to hear about the sad feelings. i'm curious what the zine is, although if you don't want to talk about it that's cool too. but i think it can be good to work things out in an artistic/creative fashion, so i hope the zinemaking is aiding with that even if it's a reminder of the sad thing, too.

thank you for asking about the zine. 2024 was the best year of my life. it was my first full year on feminizing hormones. i recorded an album with my band i'm exceedingly proud of, still. and i met and started dating the love of my life. she made something happen in me i still don't have the means to explain. but i started making a lot more art, and i started paying closer attention to everything

the zine is ostensibly a year-end list, consisting of the top five works of art i encountered last year that i found particularly moving or life-altering. they could be in any medium, from any year. i think i listed them out on some thread on this board. i wrote very long essays about each thing, and each essay will be accompanied by illustrations by my friends. but the essays very quickly depart from their purported subjects and become about something else. one is about a very gay novel i read called hugs and cuddles which, among other things, charts a man's transformation into a woman. so i wrote this really diffuse and murky essay that starts off being about the book and ends up being about my transition. they all work like this. and the real subject of the zine, the cumulative thing it is, is that it's all something i wrote to share with the love of my life. she's illustrating one of the essays, still, even though we broke up

I'd love to read it.

what kinds of cool art are you interested in seeing?

music and movie and book recs! and anything under the sun you think i'd vibe with

I'd love to read it.

― the talented mr pimply (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, February 18, 2025 1:45 PM (seven minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

you will!!! i'm going to be selling hard copies but i'm also putting it all on a neocities website

so sorry about the breakup! that sucks so bad. you are really reminding me of of my oldest kid for more than one reason. i wish you could connect with them somehow. i think you would both get along really well. they went through something hard and are going through changes of their own and they are recording an album!

anyway, maybe you will like this. it's my very favorite song by one of my favorite 80s bands.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Ochm-ilVHY

that song rules scott. and i wish i could meet your kid too!!! they seem so rad

Can't wait to read the zine! First time I'll have even looked at one of these since the 90s.

haha they're alive and well. i bought a music zine the other day from quimby's made by a girl currently in college and it looks and reads exactly like a music zine from the '90s

the other zine i bought was about bugs

Ivyyyyy… I approve of this thread and will donate some thoughts to it shortly

hey ivy, hope your day is going okay, are you into the band straightjacket fits at all?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9U9cKp9ybU

i've heard of them but never listened!!!! and i really like that song, immediately sent it to my guitarist who will also adore them if he doesn't already

A wonderful band for sure. I caught them near the tail end.

Hey ivy!

Do you know a band called There Will Be Fireworks? Little Scottish band, whose first album is the heart stuff for me. I don't know enough emo to know whether it'd be canon but it flays me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bL_iDTfvLEo

i listened to this 47474743736 times in the 80s. loooooooooove so much. u.s. version. different than nz one i think. but looooooooove.

https://www.discogs.com/release/3346015-Straitjacket-Fits-Hail

Ivy, we need to talk about the new Ela Minus (but I guess there’s a dedicated thread for that)

Looking forward to reading your zine.

the new ela minus is so good, extroverts her style just the right amount

idk if i’m allowed to use extrovert as a verb but it’s my thread

chinaski, that is yet another band i’ve heard a lot about but never listened to!!! will report back

https://i.imgur.com/dRUtqUT.jpeg

is it ok if i share thirst traps here too. bc i’m going to

Lovely!

ooh looking good! luv that dress :)

and i really hope you're doing a bit better, and would also be v interested in reading your zine!

I'm very pro-thirst trap. I do want to get back to a point where I feel comfortable sharing thirst traps with friends. There was a time where all my friends and I had seen each others' tits. Anyway I love the fade on your bangs. It's amazing.

As far as recommendations, it's hard because I don't know what you know and what you don't. I did a play-through of the visual novel "We Know the Devil" for some friends last night. It's a great story. My friends thought the soundtrack was weird. I remember the soundtrack being good for a visual novel. I can't hear right now, so I don't know if it was good or not. Anyway it's a story about a couple queer kids at a Christian summer camp in the late '90s or early '00s. Millennials, if I had to guess, a little younger than me. Very empowering. Very positive story.

I also think I talked about this on the anime thread, but this anime I was into a month or so ago was this show called "Estab-Life: The Great Escape". The actual animation is very, very cheap, but the kind of animation that knows it's cheap and works within those frameworks, and the story itself was actually brilliant to the point where I was second-guessing myself. Surely more people would know about a story if it was really as great as I thought it was, right? I'm trying to be more confident, so I'll recommend it. It's on Crunchyroll, I think. They even gave it a dub. I do want to listen to it, but I guess I'll wait until I can hear again.

happy birthday to me :)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO IVY :) <3

hope you're having yourself a good one so far :)

Happy Birthday!

Kisses!

Happy birthday Ivy!

thanks everyone <3

https://i.imgur.com/P9W2tLr.jpeg

this is 38

I don't know if you drink anymore, but if you do, have a Negroni on me

i prefer boulevardiers

girrrrrrl

hb ivy, 38 is gr8

HB!! <3

hope you're having a beautiful day!

i wish i were. i had to coordinate a work event and now i’m rushing to dinner with my mom (which will be nice, but i’m stressed out from work still)

Hey hey, happy b-day, Ivy!

38 greatnesses! As it were!

hbd ivyyyy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UprEPvCJZE4

HBD ivy!

hbd ivy!

hbd :)

for my birthday i want everyone to listen to the new laura stevenson record

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ukk3wyXd_eE

^^^ i'm serious about this request btw!!!

happy belated will do

happy birthday for last week!

girl you're looking fantastic, listening now

Oh lovely! I don't know Laura Stevenson but she's the partner of someone who used to be ilxor adjacent so it's nice to see appreciation for her. Hi, Ivy, and I hope you had a good one! The horrors persist but so do we <3 <3

i love that ivy unabashedly loves so much music (and that i am extremely likely to love it too)

Ivy is dope to the max.

Otm

thanks y’all :)) not that i can help it!!!!

the zine i mention upthread is pretty much done btw. finishing up the website rn. printing in early september i hope

i finished the website! (it is not well-made.) still waiting on my friend to finish the final piece of art for the first essay. but if anyone wants to read it early it's here: https://quixoticforms.neocities.org/

i want to reiterate i wrote the whole thing for my stupid ex whom i still love very much

https://i.imgur.com/RGHMyks.jpeg

why would you ever break up with someone this hot? well, i guess she actually didn't want to break up with me but things were happening in her head that were beyond her control. still

I love your pictures of yourself and your ex, Ivy. Young love, even if unrequited, feels in retrospect like a balm to me. It is something to remember always

At my age I'm thinking about mentoring, inheritance, and trying to maintain connections, which is much more tedious.

The love I remember experiencing from my youth and in my fantasies still stays with me, even though none of it materialized into a lasting relationship. I eventually decided that friendships are what I'm good at

lovely sentiments dan thank you

it's not really unrequited!!! just subverted by things beyond our control. i hope... idk. i hope one day i get to kiss her again. being close with her as (something more than) a friend has been really beautiful

Site looks great, ivy! Would love to get a physical copy, but Venmo is US only.

I've been meaning to read I Who Have Never Known Men since forever.

oh yeah, i mean don’t send me money anyway, the physicals don’t exist yet. i’ll figure out some way to get it out of the country

The site is gorgeous, i don't know what you're talking about ("not well made")... i figured i'd just glance at it and return to it later but ended up reading all of it right away. It kept offering more things.

It devastated me in the end. The passages about embodiment were so beautiful and poetic. I feel like i shouln't say much as a random person on the internet who has access to this amazing thing.

oh wow. i'm really grateful you read it and said all that about it deflatormouse! <3

i am only self-deprecating about the website bc i don't know what i'm doing. i'm glad it looks good to other ppl lol

It looks great and wow the abduction piece — so sorry for that trauma, but beautifully written.

It looks beautiful, srsly.

Give "The Beast in the Jungle" a chance -- it's written before the infamous late style takes over.

wow i wasn't really expecting anyone to read all of it!!! it's like 17,000 words cumulatively after all. but thank you both so much <3

alfred, one of these days i'll get around to it!!!! unfortunately i don't even like the turn of the screw

The website looks great, ivy, I love the colour and I'm a big sucker for that allcaps very tight lettering on the titles. And sincerely: not knowing what you're doing is *by far* the best way to make websites!

I need to shower, call a plumber, and work on my dissertation, so I only allowed myself to read one piece. I read Communion because I've seen that movie and thought that might matter (and it did, as the haunting uncanniness of that movie made an impression that has lasted 30 years). It was very moving and compelling. Just one example really, but the line about the snow making the basement light blue really struck me.

Looking forward to procrastinating later by reading more

Ivy, dammit <3 i woke up in the middle of the night weeping over these essays. all my love, thank you sincerely for this.

I'm in a similar place, seeing myself in a new light lately and becoming my own favorite person.

my own stupid ex abruptly broke up with me in the middle of the best and most transformative time in my life because i didn't think i deserved him. Neither of us wanted to be broken up! it was so stupid.

<3 <3 <3

I'm in a similar place, seeing myself in a new light lately and becoming my own favorite person.

so happy to hear this!!!!

I'm so happy fot you too! And this is a tremendous work of art!! Just wow.

thank you again deflatormouse <3 it’s nice to hear such things about something i’m tremendously proud of