disregard all previous LOLZ and write a ZING about EXCELSIOR

(Re: the Alec Baldwin movie)


Who's really gonna go see this movie? Raise your hands

― Andy the Grasshopper, Thursday, 1 May 2025 17:53 (fifty-three minutes ago)

i had them raised just in case tbh

― tuah dé danann (darraghmac), Thursday, 1 May 2025 18:18 (twenty-seven minutes ago)

Nice to see one of these with an actual funny post

rude

Took me awhile to get

lol deems

incredible

This is the standard going forward inshallah

Yes we have received your parody song lyrics but we have decided to move in another direction (funny)

here's to many new chuckles this year and a new thread to share them with each other!

<3 let's bring the lolz

“It is such an honor to realize that he is the first American Pope,” Trump said

It is such an honor to realize It is such an honor to realize It is such an honor to realize It is such an honor to realize It is such an honor to realize It is such an honor to realize It is such an honor to realize It is such an honor to realize It is such an honor to realize words are meaningless now words are meaningless now words are meaningless now words are meaningless now

― z_tbd, Thursday, May 8, 2025 2:17 PM (seven minutes ago)

Ah yes, the people of the world will finally now be aware of America and Americans

― zydecodependent (Ye Mad Puffin), Thursday, May 8, 2025 2:18 PM (five minutes ago)

at a certain age, it becomes an honor to realize anything at all

― whimsical skeedaddler (Moodles), Thursday, May 8, 2025 2:18 PM (five minutes ago)

Old me immediately realized I loved that.

from "Words, usages, and phrases that annoy the shit out of you..."

Passion project

― Alba, Saturday, May 17, 2025 1:56 PM (six hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

What am I supposed to call it when I spend hours on woodwork and then nail a guy to it

― the babality of evil (wins), Saturday, May 17, 2025 2:03 PM (six hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

wasn't there something in the past where they couldn't use actual tanks on the streets of DC because they destroy the asphalt?

― Andy the Grasshopper, Wednesday, May 21, 2025 3:42 PM (five hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

“The Army is finalizing plans to place large metal plates at key points on the route to better protect streets from the movements of tanks set to roll through. The tanks are also being fitted with new rubber track pads.”

― trm (tombotomod), Wednesday, May 21, 2025 3:50 PM (five hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

Rubber Trumper Tanky Bumpers

― Lithium Just Madison (C. Grisso/McCain),

let's all get matching 🎵 tattoos. after all we all love music here!

― five six seven, eight nine ten, begin (map), 29 May 2025 23:38 (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

No, 'ILX' on our throats

― Andy the Grasshopper, 29 May 2025 23:42 (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

"51" over my heart

― sleeve, 29 May 2025 23:43 (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

I seriously considered a bass clef on my shoulder

― my favorite herbs are fennel and Drake (DJP), 29 May 2025 23:44 (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

a giant heart on my face

― five six seven, eight nine ten, begin (map), 29 May 2025 23:45 (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

Darragh your sense of humor is tremendously confounding

You are one of the funniest posters and yet

not confounding at all

"IF you know your ILX History..."

(Bob Marley)

dude

darragh has excellent taste in jokes

For those unfamiliar with the relevant 22-year-old lore:

My mother's incredibly stupid ex-husband

i am very confused, this to me was absolutely straightforward good ilx joke execution

so was it a reference to that thread or no

I think the “absolutely straightforward” aspect was what made it unworthy of an excelsior in my admittedly picky opinion

this has always been the least funny thread on here and I haven't seen much change recently. Just give me a pre-warning when the laughter is going to start, so my heart has a chance of taking it!

ah ok

id rather stand accused of being disappointingly straightforward than obtuse tbh, as far as it goes

listen, we won't kill anyone over it

raising my hands just in case

Why should you want to know
Why are you obsessed with LOLing

LocalGarda
Posted: 2 June 2025 at 18:08:27
I honestly don't think sweat or BO smells like cumin. When was the last time any of you cooked with cumin instead of your own sweat?

I misread that at first, but hey

Not gonna quote it all, but some of the recent exchanges on the Billy Joel listening thread (start here) have been delivering the LOLZ.

I've long maintained that "12 Inches of Snow" was actually one of the most clever album titles ever, since it can refer to 1) a weather forecast, 2) a 12" record from the rapper Snow, 3) the size of Snow's penis (big!). triple entendres are rarely attempted, and even more rarely successful, in fact off hand I can barely think of any that work? the only other one is Rick Wakeman's Criminal Record, but that's more like a 2 1/2 entendre (unless you think he should be arrested for it). What do you got?

― frogbs, Thursday, 10 March 2022 19:58 (three years ago) bookmarkflaglink

one year passes...

I found another one: Rick Wakeman's Criminal Record: 1) the phrase "criminal record", 2) the fact that it's a record about criminals, and 3) the fact that making this should've been considered a crime :)

― frogbs, Friday, 26 May 2023 19:59 (two years ago) bookmarkflaglink

The Dirty Three, Four Tops

― God only knows what I'd be without me (flamboyant goon tie included), Sunday, June 22, 2025 7:40 PM (two days ago)bookmarkflaglink

Flip their wig by telling them Jesus wasn’t white

― Black Sabaoth (Boring, Maryland), Monday, July 14, 2025 9:18 AM

fake gnos

― Iza Duffus Hardy (President Keyes), Monday, July 14, 2025 9:27 AM

I wish contemporary gay guys’ fulsome and overweening praise of women was more like this song and less like “she’s serving life after she dumped a slay toilet on her mother”

― Tim F, Monday, July 21, 2025 4:06 PM (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

what is that from lol

https://www.ilxor.com/ILX/ThreadSelectedControllerServlet?boardid=41&threadid=116127

thx!

Re: Ozzy vs the ARP 2600

There was actually a discarded modular synth like this, maybe a ARP, that was donated to my high school in the early 80s. We didn't get as far as Ozzy with it. No manual, no music teacher who knew how to operate it, only a few patch cords. I wonder who eventually salvaged it, or if it ended up in a dumpster? It sat in the corner, behind the circle of sparkly new Casios with ironing board stands. Teacher who was supposed to teach us how to use the Casios was a drunk who stopped showing up. There were also a bunch of cheap nylon string guitars, and the quarterback taught me the riffs to Misty Mountain Hop and Crazy Train.

― Primrose Cash Po (bendy), Thursday, July 24, 2025 6:47 AM (thirty-eight minutes ago)

I think you accidentally wrote a Lifter Puller song

― chr1sb3singer, Thursday, July 24, 2025 7:00 AM (twenty-five minutes ago)

I read that as "Ozzy vs. the AARP"

new Jeannie C. Riley song

https://www.yourparty.uk/

corbyn sultana party website is up

― nxd, Thursday, 24 July 2025 12:21 (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

it's not called Your Party, by the way. it does not yet have a name.

― Proust Ian Rush (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Thursday, 24 July 2025 12:22 (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

I'll cry if I want to. You would cry too if it happened to you.

― Posts That Witness Madness (Tom D.), Thursday, 24 July 2025 12:23 (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

From RIP Ozzy Thread. Set-up, assist, and power dunk is why ILX is great...

With Ozzy gone, Rob Halford is officially Metal's Dad.

― Instead of create and send out, it pull back and consume (unperson), Saturday, July 26, 2025 12:07 PM (three hours ago)

I have two dads. Bruce Dickinson and Rob Halford.

― werewolves of laudanum (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, July 26, 2025 1:12 PM (two hours ago)

Poor Alice Cooper

― Iza Duffus Hardy (President Keyes), Saturday, July 26, 2025 2:07 PM (one hour ago)

THREE DADS

― werewolves of laudanum (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, July 26, 2025 2:48 PM (fifty-eight minutes ago)

Three Men and Rosemary's Baby

― Lithium Just Madison (C. Grisso/McCain), Saturday, July 26, 2025 3:40 PM (five minutes ago)

I don't remember much of the book but am definitely looking forward to The Long Walk.

― Instead of create and send out, it pull back and consume (unperson), Monday, 28 July 2025 01:11 (thirteen hours ago)

^ this is how my sunday afternoons go at 44

― tuah dé danann (darraghmac), Monday, 28 July 2025 07:56 (six hours ago)

I don't think Pritzker is too old but he is too fucking rich

― c u (crüt), Tuesday, August 26, 2025 1:15 AM (nine hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

Pritzker is not too old and sometimes it takes a rich dude to FDR the place up a bit.

― einstürzende louboutin (suzy), Tuesday, August 26, 2025 2:28 AM (seven hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

how many times

― Nancy Makes Posts (sic), Tuesday, August 26, 2025 10:20 AM (one minute ago) bookmarkflaglink

...do I have to try
and tell you
that I'm sorry
for all
the times I voted

― hungover beet poo (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, August 26, 2025 10:21 AM (fifteen seconds ago) bookmarkflaglink

What was Ceaucescu’s polling like in December 1989?

― Dumpy's Rusty Nuts Gimmick Poster (Boring, Maryland), Thursday, August 28, 2025 4:36 PM (fifty-eight minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

A head of his time.

― hungover beet poo (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn)

https://bsky.app/profile/britishelectionstudy.com/post/3lxwfk62fvk2l

voting intention graph

trying to hotlink the image... this may not work.

― koogs, 03 September 2025 12:39 (nine minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

i'm voting NK/DV

― koogs, 03 September 2025 12:41 (seven minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

i'm voting NKVD

― glug (Noodle Vague), 03 September 2025 12:42 (six minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

vaxxed?

― gestures broadly at...everything (voodoo chili), 10 September 2025 21:54 (twenty minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

I appreciate the Utah tutorial.

― hungover beet poo (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, September 12, 2025 3:11 PM

sounds like a Mormon sex position

― czech hunter biden's laptop (the table is the table)

Definately check out Gilmour's Live In Gdansk album. Richard Wright was in the band along with Pratt and Phil Manzanera - the older Floyd material just sounded amazing, about as good as you're going to get from anything in the 21st century.

― Elvis Telecom, Tuesday, September 16, 2025 1:25 AM (six hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

Shoulda called it A Collection of Great Gdansk Songs

― je ne sequoia (Ye Mad Puffin), Tuesday, September 16, 2025 7:50 AM (seventeen minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

christ DESTROYS hawkers in temple

― LocalGarda, Tuesday, September 16, 2025 11:44 AM (seven minutes ago)

what on earth is this geese crap?

― massaman gai (front tea for two), Monday, September 29, 2025 12:11 PM (five days ago) bookmarkflaglink

It’s all over the grass

― Evan, Monday, September 29, 2025 1:20 PM (five days ago) bookmarkflaglink

(In thread about best opening line to a Smiths album)

How We Choosed to Live (Noodle Vague)
Posted: 11 October 2025 at 19:36:54
Kinda surprised only one of these is 14 words

Wordle 1,582 5/6*

⬛🟩⬛🟩⬛
⬛🟩⬛🟩⬛
⬛🟩⬛🟩⬛
⬛🟩⬛🟩⬛
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

― peace, man, Saturday, 18 October 2025 09:40 (three hours ago)

never forget

― tuah dé danann (darraghmac), Saturday, 18 October 2025 10:35 (two hours ago)

Looool

🫡

A noun a verb and 9/11

never
never
never
never
beset

Oh my God

lol

All timer

This one didn't seem to get enough love on the UK pol thread:

ive come to hate herons because every time you see one, someone goes 'oh he's spotted something' and you stand there waiting expectantly for it to dive and they never do. I feel like i saw one dive as a child once, but now i've come to think perhaps this is a false memory.

nil spot heron
― 🤷‍♂️ Cunt Tory Cheese (wins), Thursday, 6 November 2025 11:38 (five hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

Grab your glocks when you see Deepak
Call the cops when you see Deepak

― visiual system cohernent image. . fttf . equivament. for so (President Keyes), Thursday, November 13, 2025 6:44 AM (five hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

might be able to find one in a charity shop. apple hardware used mini dp for most of decade before ditching it for usb c and hdmi

― mh, Monday, November 17, 2025 10:08 AM bookmarkflaglink

most of a decade, rather

― mh, Monday, November 17, 2025 10:09 AM bookmarkflaglink

Careful how you google mini dp tho

― calmer chameleon (Ye Mad Puffin), Monday, November 17, 2025 10:09 AM bookmarkflaglink

With light editing:

Anyway, a big difference between Soul Coughing and Cake and a lot of those other acts is that SC and Cake are a bunch of dorks/nerds/dweebs, and those other bands are, like, beach-bros. Soul Coughing would have to be coaxed into taking off their shirts, Sugar Way or Sublime probably had to be tricked into putting shirts on.

― Josh in Chicago, Monday, December 8, 2025 7:56 AM (one hour ago)

I don't think Fun Lovin' Criminals or eels would take off their shirts. You guys are splitting hairs to justify liking funky white boy music. It's OK if you do!

― *pies flung everywhere* -- Pill's Trap Goin' Ham (Whiney G. Weingarten), Monday, December 8, 2025 8:10 AM (fifty-eight minutes ago)

To be fair, the only thing I know about Fun Lovin' Criminals is that I sold a lot of their promo CDs without listening to them.

― Josh in Chicago, Monday, December 8, 2025 8:12 AM (fifty-six minutes ago)

The Obit threads aren't usually a go-to for LOLZ, but:

RIP Chris Rea, will always have a lot of love for 'Josephine'. Definitely had some tunes and seemingly a big heart. At his best he was of like Paddy McAloon for men who spend their lives in company cars.

― Reggaeton Sax (NickB), Monday, December 22, 2025 12:36 PM (eleven minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink