School Reports

He has entered with gusto into the little projects and diversions designed to makes us tolerable to each other.

and

At present, Andrew's mood is sardonic. I fully expect him to develop irony.

Next time the teacher had cause to ask her what she was doing, Michelle said 'I'm creating a disturbance.'

GCSE history result: A*

Presumably this was to demonstrate his contempt for the reporting process, but we shouldn't make him into too much of a hero because he used to throw chairs at pupils as well.

NOW LOOK AT ME! HA HA HA HA!

My standard one late in my school career was something like:
"Martin does not take school seriously enough and is repeatedly disrespectful to staff. His disruptive behaviour is becoming intolerable and unless improvements are made I shall refuse to teach him next term.
Mark: 83%. Position: 1st."

(I genuinely received several very much like that. Though I never thought they were at all outrageous, just funny.)

Best/worst comment on a piece of work: You obviously haven't spent enough time on this. Redo. 4/10.

I'd spent a week worrying and slaving over this, my first 'A' Level essay. Whatabitch.

He was probably the only teacher I liked while in school, and sadly he died this week quite young.

Most of my school reports were similar to this!

i changed once i left school.

Andrew has been slack all semester.

Assessment tasks: A+, A+, A+.
Exam results: 107%.

Refuses to follow instructions and colours balloons in circles, may need to be held back.

1st year uni: Music Theory I
(similar to some posted)
Refuses to take class seriously and rarely attends, excepting those periods which I kave asked him to teach. Will be bypassing the next 3 sections of the programme, but must make an effort to be present.
Percent: 99 Rank: 1st Tardies: 1 Absences: 27

Martin, she refused to include my score in the standardisatioon process as it would have "skewed" the results. (aparrently she thought I was "above" the other students)

"When I came to Australia and heard the way you people speak, I cut out my tongue and swore!"

"The other teachers are always complaining about all of these extra-curricular events. That's nothing! In Russia we went without electricity or running water for two months!"

Quality of effort: Needs attention
Quality of output: Excellent

Keystage level: 10+
Predicted GCSE grade: A*

Was anyone else really bored in the subjects they were good at?

(I have no ideas of my own so I have to steal other people's to post)

:-)

So that's only, what, 95% of the time?

Actually got AAC. :(

In primary school I got told I was quiet and didn't ask for help enough. In high school I got quiet, didn't ask for help at all, until fourth year where I was actually in a class with some of my friends, then got, talks too much but doesn't ask for help. All A's except for two B's in maths and re. I would have got an A in maths if I'd stayed with the good teacher, bah.

nothing ever changes, hey?

The other weird thing was most of my reports said 0 absent days but I could swear I bunked off or was sick a reasonable amount.

My mother was called in one time because I drew a picture of boobs and stuck it up in the bathroom.

The headteacher said I was 'a bit too sexually aware for my own good'.

I've already taught my whole row to do the Gazzintas.

We had a surprising amount of potential comments when our cards went to computer. The only time I ever hid a report card was in 8th grade when I was recovering from a huge bout of mono and had a D in math for the quarter. Got the 'you know you've got to get this out of your system because from next year, it all counts towards college' speech and never got anything less than a B again. Also, classic 'hey, she's bored because she's GIFTED' realisation (our school had a gifted programme for the top 50 kids in each year of about 400).

what's a sit?

Child's name LJ
Class 5
School Year 1996-97 (ages 9-10)

Class teacher's comment

There is no doubt that Louis is quite outstanding in many areas of the curriculum. He is a passionate child who has much to tell us all, sometimes his enthusiasm can be irritating to others which is frustrating for him. He is working hard at remembering that everybodies opinion and answers should be respected and that the world does not revolve around him.

We shall all miss Louis at All Saints; he certainly is a character whose sense of humour and knowledge has mesmorised me on occasions this year. Good luck in your new school Louis I have no doubt that you'll do very well indeed!

English

Louis has a natural flair for this subject. He has a love of a wide variety of books which he devours, retaining information extremely well. His written work is well expressed and he has amazed me with the content and ease he is able to write all forms of language. His poetry is really excellent. His spelling is correct in all his independent writing and he uses a wide vocabulary. He has a self assured manner when he speaks and always wants to contribute in class discussion which can be annoying for the others but he is beginning to learn to control such eagerness.

12 years on, eh?

(Chip in yourselves, everyone! The younger the better.)

do you have any more?

Mathematics

Louis has an outstanding natural ability for mathematics. He has an extra-ordinary ability for a boy of his age to solve problems, see patterns in number and be able to use and apply his knowledge as he requires. His mental agility is also extremely good although he does not like to be formally tested, as there is a time limit. This might suggest that he cannot cope with holding numbers in his head - which is far from the truth - he just doesn't like a time limit imposed on him, not that he cannot [word illegible] quickly for he can. A wonderful brain!

[I should have done Maths at university, is what I've realised since graduating, also this is hella solipsistic! C'mon, there must be more of you out there with dredgable reports]

yours are great. keep going!

Science: Louis enjoys science especially when it involves practical investigations. He likes to make very elaborate plans for an investigation and finds it difficult to see an investigation through to its conclusion as he is easily side tracked. Louis is extremely confident in his use of scientific vocabulary. He is able to put forward his own suggestions for why things happen and conveys his ideas very clearly. He is able to use abstract ideas in descriptions and explantions. Louis has particularly enjoyed the work studying plants and mini-beasts in the school grounds where he had the opportunity to display his considerable subject knowledge.

did your teacher actually misspell "explanations"?

Design and Technology

Louis has some amazing ideas. He is able to take his ideas from concept to manufacture although I think he is over ambitious in what he thinks he can achieve and can become frustrated.

Information technology

Louis has used the IT equipment to convey ideas and information in a variety of ways.

[^^^new ILX profile description, also WHOOPS that was my error, all the other errors are as written]

Geography

Louis compared our locality to an Indian village well. He uses an atlas effectively and is able to discuss landuse, features and pin point specific places using a six figure grid reference.

History

Louis shows us that he has an excellent grasp of the past in terms of his factual knowledge and being able to make links between the reasons for an event occuring, the result of it and then the changes that this caused. He realises that the past can be represented and interpreted in different ways and can suggest interesting reasons why this might be the case.

"suggest interesting reasons"

Art

Louis is a little slap-dash and so finds it frustrating to spend too much time on a piece of work. He has shown that he has a good sense of colour and produced a good piece of work on perspective. He made an excellent contribution at the National Gallery observing extremely well - keep us all on our toes!

Music

Louis composes and performs well. He has good ideas which he shares with his group but gets frustrated if they don't like his ideas. He has made an extremely valuable contribution to the school band which will be missed.

what was it?

(I played a single tom! On the beat! Enthusiastically! Still own that tom, tbh, and hit it sometimes)

(and yeah I was already typing that out before you asked - self-obsessed, moi? dear lord)

i don't doubt your enthusiasm.

i want to know about the interesting suggestions - did you make up absurd far-fetched stuff, is that why the teacher said "interesting suggestions"?

P.E.

Louis always tries his best in all activities approaching all he does with such enthusiasm. He has amazed himself by proving to be good at catching, in rounders. His ideas for gymnatic sequences are good but he does lack the ability to perform to the standard he wants - which leads to frustration.

R.E.

Louis has learnt about aspects of the Jewish faith. He has also reflected on worship and the natural world as part of God's creation. He always has something of interest to say which is often thought provoking! I have enjoyed reading about Louis special weeks and its proved to be an excellent record of changes over the months.

[^^^that's what it seems to say!! I don't know what on earth my suggestions were but something tells me they may have been outlandish]

ur mum is so proud

"thought provoking!" in teacher speak tended to mean "outrageous, outlandish, unexpected, and occasionally disrupted the class"

AUTUMN

Topics this term have included Decimals,Shape and Space (Maths),Developing Country and Contrasting Locality- India (Geog), Forces and Earth in Space (Science) and Worship and Judaism.(R.E.).

Your child visited Westferry Printers as part of English,a Jewish exhibition to look at artefacts and watched a Science demonstration on Forces.

SPRING.

Topics this term included Problem Solving,Numeracy Project (Maths),The Vikings (History)and Creation (R.E). In Science they expolored Sound and Humans as Living Organisms.

Your child visited the National Gallery to look at how the techniques that artists use in Landscape and Greenwich Park to observe the changes in nature.

SUMMER.

Topics this term have included Data Handling,Bearings and Numeracy Project (Maths), Vikings and Sea and Sea Farers (Hist), Longitude and Latitude, Rivers,(Geog), Floating and Sinking,Living things and the Environment and Minibeasts. In R.E. The Bible and Saints.

Your child also visited the National Maritime Museum and was involved in a drama and went on a whole school visit to Leeds Castle.

and was involved in a drama

lol

what happened at the Maritime Museum? What did you do?

iirc discovered how semaphore works and marvelled at scale models of frigates - may have been a simulation on how to steer a boat from port too

oh wait I REMEMBER!!!

the drama was a re-enactment of an invasion of fair isle by british sailors - they said to the class of 30 'we need 25 volunteers' and obviously being the lone strider that i am i kept my hand down correctly figuring that the remaining 5 would be doing something much, much more interesting - they were the british sailors, and we were the fair isle natives, and we got to sing songs around an imaginary cauldron about protecting the isle of sheep - it was hella fun

Are all report cards this WORDY in Britain? I remember the longest comment I ever got was "conscientious in the classroom, but awkward in gym."

No one ever had much to say about me. When they announced the student of the week at my junior high over the intercom, the nominee would usually get paragraphs of gushing praise enumerating their many traits and accomplishments.. One week, I was pleasantly surprised to find I was student of the week. Announcement went: "Abbie is student of the week. Mrs. Benefiel, who nominated her, says, 'She's great.'"

haha! yeah mine were often quite wordy although this one is all 'bright spark who due to megalomania gets frustrated and needs to stfu' over and over again; report probably otm

abbott you are worthy of many, many more words than that but i am guessing your great and manifold opposition to accepted normality wasn't handled very well by staff? as in, they didn't know what to say, so didn't? those lines are quite lol in their sheer blankness

good musicianship
beautiful voice

suggestions for improvements
deep breath will help you get thru phrases and enable the tone to be free
be the character. Use your VERY expressive face to your advantage
suggest coloratura literature

I think they are funny too. However, I do not think the pith is due to me being some ineffable teflon to description.

Do you guys just have your childhood report cards sitting around?

that was some certificate from a choral festival i was in in high school that for some reason i put in my childhood photo album. all report cards and that kinda stuff is at my parents' house.

mine was found today in a cupboard clear-out! it was very exciting.

'awkward in gym' was a muy diplomatic way of putting it on my teacher's part btw.

"A ray of light in a cloudy room."

"grade not indicative of ability"

I wonder why lots of teachers don't realise that writing a shitty report with a top-of-the-class exam report at the end will just make the student feel even more entitled and insufferable!

I really like writing reports.

Reminded by NV comment today

"MC**** is basically a good student but he will insist on making animal noises"

honestly teachers they'll pick on owt

from back of room:

"meowt"

that reminds me of a classic joke involving the class naughty kid doing an oyster impression