Friendeteria...an ILX-friendly social media experiment

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On June 6th I posted this to Facebook:

During the summer of the 2020 lockdown, I did a lot of thinking about social media. I wrote “We all want to leave Facebook. Everybody hates Facebook. With good reason. Political reasons. Monetary reasons. Ethics. etc. Once upon a time we wanted to leave because we couldn't promote to our own "followers" without "boosting". Now we want to leave because we understand that social media is partially responsible for the destruction of the earth.”

At the time some people stuck with Twitter. That’s now X. Others say the solution is in the decentralized fediverse. All I knew is I wanted to be able to post and share. Short “tweets”, longer rants. Pictures, links etc. I wanted my friends to see them and I wanted to see my friends. I didn’t want to see promoted posts and sponsored posts and attention-grabbing meaningless reels. I didn’t want an algorithm. I wanted my friend’s content, in chronological order.

I thought hey, I built a 7000 member yahoogroup called nyhappenings, surely I can convince a few people to join the ideal social media site. I looked at competing sites and they were all terrible. =Then I tried looking to build one myself using some of the now popular “no-code” tools, but I was too lazy or they weren’t good enough for me to make something that worked how I wanted it to work. How is that?

Here's my simple and brilliant idea of how I think a social media network should work. I'll say this again here without fear that somebody will steal the idea, because if they do, then great! I'll join that site!

Give me a timeline. Chronological order. Posts can be as short or long as you like. A “continued within” link is added automatically once you hit a certain limit, so walls aren't filled with endless posts. If one person posts too much, maybe a “see more from…” link appears instead of multiple posts from a single person per day.

There's no algorithm. You see all the posts, in order of posting, from your contacts. Here's the fun part, and this comes from what I was planning for nyhappenings 2.0. At the very top there's a "filter". It limits or expands what you're seeing.

The default setting, is it shows all your connections. The next option is to show your connections, and public posts from their connections. That is how you get exposed to things outside of your immediate network. Maybe in the future you can make groups with labels (friends, co-workers, high school friends, people with good record collections) and click to limit to those.

Now when you post you decide on the reach. If you have it set to only friends, only people you're directly friends with see it. But if you make it public, then friends of friends can see it.

Maybe there's a "trending" posts, some way to see things that are gaining traction. Discovery of friends of friends public content, or interactions your friends are having outside of your network is available easily, but doesn't drown out the primary timeline.
Eventually add groups. No ads. No suggestions. No reels. Every post can be formatted however you like. Maybe it's rich text/html. Maybe it's links. Maybe it's a whole essay. Maybe it's a short video. Maybe just a photo. Maybe just a word.

I don't know, those are some of the things I was thinking about. Events and calendars might be cool too. In the 5 years since I started thinking about this, social media has gotten worse. Everybody wants to be able to interact with their community without dealing with Zuckerberg or Musk or Dorsey or whatever other terrible tech-bro seems to control all of this. And you have things like Bluesky but that’s trying to recreate Twitter, not Facebook. Then I learned about vibe-coding. I don’t want to get into a whole AI debate. It’s terrible and it’s useful. I found a site that let’s you use simple language to describe a website and within a few hours I built a social media site much closer to my ideal than I had been with the no-code tools. What I’d like to do is get some people to join and test it out, work out some of the kinks. Then get more people to join and see if we can’t get any community traction. Then once the proof of concept is in the pudding, raise a billion dollars and build the site for real and finally supply a functional replacement for Facebook/Twitter/X/Instagram/friendster/orkut/livejournal/etc.

If you've read this far and you’re interested in joining and seeing how it looks, let me know and I’ll send you a code. It is very buggy and needs a lot of work, but would love to be able to test it with other humans. Once you join you can generate a few codes to invite others, but it’s very buyer-beware currently so the whole thing is a work in progress experiment, everything can change. Even the name, which is currently Friendeteria. Got a better suggestion? Post about it.

In the few weeks since posting that, a few people have joined and a fewer people have done some posting and testing and tire-kicking, including our stalwart hero Ned. In an effort to get more people to check it out and test it out, and open a dialogue about whether it's tenable or even a good idea, I figured I'd start a thread here.

dan selzer, Wednesday, 18 June 2025 16:28 (one week ago)

the site currently lives here:

https://friendeteria.replit.app/

send me a DM through here or through other social medias for a code.

dan selzer, Wednesday, 18 June 2025 16:29 (one week ago)

including our stalwart hero Ned

It's there to be tested! And yes, been posting a lot to see how it goes there.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 18 June 2025 17:15 (one week ago)

It's been awhile since I used replit but it seems to now be aggressively charging for things that used to be free. glitch.com is also shutting down. Do you have any options in mind for migrating if things get worse?

Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 18 June 2025 19:50 (one week ago)

My assumption is that the proof of concept will be so strong, that I will be able to find some millionaires who will pay to have the whole thing recreated/rebuilt properly.

I've paid a bit already, an annual subscription at around $25/mo and then it's been accruing fees for agent use or whatever. Considering how much I've built and how quickly, it's still a HELL of a lot cheaper than doing it for real. I don't mind spending a little bit of money to see how it goes, but also wonder if I iron out most of the kinks and build the key features I like and let it run...can I spend some time building the community and less time tweaking settings? In which case so long as the number of users isn't crazy, will I be spending less money since I'm not constantly asking it to make major programming changes?

At this point I just want to get it to a certain baseline that I envision, and in the 2 weeks it's existed, I've already knocked out tons of major goals/features. Just switched it to friendeteria.com as well.

I hope a few more people other than Ned and myself start posting and then maybe I'll work on building that community and also trying to find some people to help out. There are some more computer-savvy coders who are interested, and I may not a few people with better business sense or money than me who's advice or involvement would be greatly appreciated.

I think you always read about people starting projects and businesses and becoming masters of all these skills...and I've started a few businesses of my own related to printing and design and music stuff and kept thinking about all those people who are like "I started a business and then I learned how to build my own database and learned all about the tax code and etc etc" and I just feel like I'm too old and have too much going on and just don't have the energy. Like when I first started thinking about this 5 years ago I wasn't like "I just need to learn how to code my own website now!" I knew that wasn't going to happen. A tool like Replit is just amazing, and I see online it's not even considered the best of it's type. I see a lot of complaints that it's a scam or something, that it can't build anything. My experience so far is quite the contrary.

dan selzer, Wednesday, 18 June 2025 20:42 (one week ago)

not = know

dan selzer, Wednesday, 18 June 2025 20:43 (one week ago)

What’s wrong with ilx

calstars, Wednesday, 18 June 2025 20:46 (one week ago)

I don't know if scam's the right word but replit used to be a very convenient and free playground for projects and now it isn't. There's a plethora of free or nigh-free hosting services around. If you imagine this staying at a hobbyist level, you should be able to migrate it to one of those but if I were the evil mastermind of replit, I'd make that harder and harder to do as time goes on...

Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 18 June 2025 21:05 (one week ago)

a lot is wrong with ilx, but namely it's a forum and not a social media website.

Far as I can tell, you can still get the code out of replit if desired, but I'd be just as inclined to have somebody start from scratch and follow the structure, if that's easier than cleaning up replit's code. The fun for me was to get a working example going as quick and easily as possible.

Most of the people complaining in forums/youtube channels that it's a scam seem to be implying that it doesn't work, regardless of cost, and while I can't compre to whether other services would require more or less fussing on my part, this thing has been amazing slick for me. On one hand, I do have to tell it something more than once and it doesn't always see things through, like you ask for a feature and they add the buttons for that feature, but the buttons don't actually work, but I usually just have to follow up with one more question and it's fixed. On the other hand, the creepy ai aspect of not only understanding what I want from my crappy prompts, but understanding it and taking something even further, is pretty wild.

dan selzer, Wednesday, 18 June 2025 22:15 (one week ago)

I don't practice Friendeteria
I don't got no crystal ball~~

Actually i do on both counts

i'm now live as "fogindex" if you care to add/poke/superpoke me.

thanks for the add (in advance)

imperial frfr (Steve Shasta), Monday, 23 June 2025 23:14 (five days ago)

that would be easier if the "add friend" button wasn't invisible on a user page until you mouseover it. Fixing that now.

dan selzer, Tuesday, 24 June 2025 03:48 (four days ago)

fyi https://friendeteria.com/ is now a valid URL

Waiting for my friend to post his list of alternative names. Friendeteria has proven divisive. Even I'm on the fence.

dan selzer, Tuesday, 24 June 2025 03:49 (four days ago)

cool beans

Allen (etaeoe), Tuesday, 24 June 2025 16:00 (four days ago)

Waiting for my friend to post his list of alternative names. Friendeteria has proven divisive. Even I'm on the fence.

― dan selzer, Monday, June 23, 2025 8:49 PM (yesterday)

welp there goes my chance at making an Edgar Friendeteria joke

imperial frfr (Steve Shasta), Tuesday, 24 June 2025 16:03 (four days ago)


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