Onionesque/Simpsonesque headlines

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Holy War Is Wholly War

Earth-based War On Terror Firmer

Bush Claims Grass Is Out Of His Tree

fraid thats the best I can think of now - I hope you will do better

― stevem (blueski), Saturday, 14 December 2002 18:17 (twenty-two years ago)

'Wind Changes - Durst's Face Freezes That Way'

― Ferg (Ferg), Saturday, 14 December 2002 18:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Hope Springs Eternal
(veteran comic Bob addicted to pogo-stick)

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 December 2002 14:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Islamic Fundamentalist Has Intense Hatred of West, Tesco Clubcard

― Ferg (Ferg), Sunday, 15 December 2002 17:20 (twenty-two years ago)

"Butts grabbed by Cheeks" (as heard on TV during Lady Vols / Lady Trojans yesterday)

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Sunday, 15 December 2002 17:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Suit Filed, Hat May Follow

Contest To Find Best Neckwear Attachment Is A Tie

Foot & Mouth Go Their Separate Ways

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 December 2002 17:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Lambs Remain Silent Over Bo Peep Abduction Case

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 December 2002 17:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Kings Men Admit 'Re-assembling egg-man harder than first thought'

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 December 2002 17:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Rock On Tommy!
(Cruise found trapped under stalagtite)

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 December 2002 17:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Partners In Kryme to face judicial rap

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 December 2002 17:55 (twenty-two years ago)

two years pass...

"Teens give adults mediocre grades, survey finds "

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Saturday, 18 June 2005 14:14 (twenty years ago)

two years pass...

'Blasphemous' balls anger Afghans

― Ned Raggett, Sunday, 26 August 2007 18:31 (eighteen years ago)

Lord Custos Tribute Thread

― and what, Sunday, 26 August 2007 18:48 (eighteen years ago)

You're right there.

― Ned Raggett, Sunday, 26 August 2007 18:50 (eighteen years ago)

five months pass...

Sex with dead model 'was wrong'

― Ned Trifle II, Tuesday, 19 February 2008 14:05 (seventeen years ago)

ok that is fucked up, thanks for upsetting me before my coffee. :

― kenan, Tuesday, 19 February 2008 16:20 (seventeen years ago)

http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/44434000/jpg/_44434575_markdixie203.jpg

^^^This is just David Walliams going to see Cabaret, innit?

― Dom Passantino, Tuesday, 19 February 2008 16:22 (seventeen years ago)

.. and on the way home..

― Mark G, Tuesday, 19 February 2008 16:36 (seventeen years ago)

seven months pass...

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20081016/od_nm/us_heart_beegees

― gabbneb, Thursday, 16 October 2008 21:19 (seventeen years ago)

i know it's not the point but that is such a bullshit article. like when thinking of a song (especially in a stressful situation) you're going to automatically think of it at the recorded tempo. ask any musician who hears a live tape and is all "whoa, i guess that was pretty fast, huh."

― Jordan, Thursday, 16 October 2008 21:28 (seventeen years ago)

are they talking about the rhythm rather than the tempo?

― gabbneb, Thursday, 16 October 2008 21:59 (seventeen years ago)

no (that doesn't even make sense)

― Jordan, Thursday, 16 October 2008 22:00 (seventeen years ago)

there aren't famous songs that are 100 bpm?

― Bangelo, Thursday, 16 October 2008 22:05 (seventeen years ago)

three months pass...

1) "E-Trade Baby Implicated in Ponzi Scheme"

― M.V., Thursday, 29 January 2009 23:53 (sixteen years ago)

I'm sure any baby who was traded online had a rough enough childhood to totally explain any later involvement in financial crime

― nabisco, Thursday, 29 January 2009 23:55 (sixteen years ago)

2) "Nabisco (OTM: ILX) Posts Huge Quarterly Lols

― M.V., Friday, 30 January 2009 00:01 (sixteen years ago)

2.1) "

― M.V., Friday, 30 January 2009 00:02 (sixteen years ago)

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