Your favourite misread ILX thread titles!

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Today:

Sweeping: classic or dud?

An essay on American vomiting habits.

― jel -- (jel), Wednesday, 15 January 2003 18:48 (twenty-three years ago)

oh, and how often does this sort of misreading happen to you?

― jel -- (jel), Wednesday, 15 January 2003 18:48 (twenty-three years ago)

All the time.

I read An essay on American vomiting habits too and was thinking, "URGHH! SIck!" Then I thought maybe it was a spin-off of the Dieting thread...

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Wednesday, 15 January 2003 18:57 (twenty-three years ago)

women and their choice of titties

― N. (nickdastoor), Thursday, 16 January 2003 16:59 (twenty-three years ago)

The 12-foot penis of the Southern Left Whale.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

― Lara (Lara), Thursday, 16 January 2003 17:05 (twenty-three years ago)

Jay-Z vs Giants Superbowl

― That Girl (thatgirl), Friday, 17 January 2003 03:18 (twenty-three years ago)

are you a jaw for jesus?

― donna (donna), Friday, 17 January 2003 05:02 (twenty-three years ago)

not a misread ILX title but a misread cd cover.

Im listening to Sam Prekop right now. Anyways, my friend came over to my desk and asked me what I was listening to. I handed him the cd. "Oh Sam Peacock huh? He any good?"

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 17 January 2003 18:16 (twenty-three years ago)

crust of shame, I thought it was going to be a thread about bad bread.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 19 January 2003 21:20 (twenty-three years ago)

Today: "have you ever written on your lower body?" I had no idea WHAT it might be about.

― , Sunday, 19 January 2003 21:30 (twenty-three years ago)

Do you get DJ Krush and DJ Krust mixed up too, jel?

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Sunday, 19 January 2003 21:44 (twenty-three years ago)

haha I was just going to say crust of shame as well!

― Kim (Kim), Sunday, 19 January 2003 21:47 (twenty-three years ago)

Would that be the state young men's* sheets can get into?

*Obviously we old men don't do things like that.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Sunday, 19 January 2003 22:00 (twenty-three years ago)

All the guys I know do their sheets like 4 times a day, it's bizarre.

― Ally (mlescaut), Sunday, 19 January 2003 22:32 (twenty-three years ago)

"P.S. We Should Be Shopping Together Too"

― naked as sin (naked as sin), Sunday, 19 January 2003 23:01 (twenty-three years ago)

one I started, "NYC: Fancy a Rubber"--Felicity and I were looking for bridge partners in the five boroughs--was misinterpreted by Jess, as I recall.

― M Matos (M Matos), Monday, 20 January 2003 00:22 (twenty-three years ago)

'shopkeepers will be persecuted'

― minna (minna), Monday, 20 January 2003 01:13 (twenty-three years ago)

panties that start too early

― minna (minna), Monday, 20 January 2003 11:08 (twenty-three years ago)

'the point of prolapse'

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 20 January 2003 11:42 (twenty-three years ago)

t/s: miffy vs greg kitten

― g-kit (g-kit), Monday, 20 January 2003 12:02 (twenty-three years ago)

Crap Intimidation Techniques

― jel -- (jel), Saturday, 25 January 2003 17:01 (twenty-three years ago)

Lots of ppl misread my "Walking With Beasts" as "Walking With Breasts".

― MarkH (MarkH), Saturday, 25 January 2003 17:27 (twenty-three years ago)

I just read "Fucked Country" as "Fucked Courtney" and thought, "Oh, here we go again..."

― Arthur (Arthur), Saturday, 25 January 2003 18:04 (twenty-three years ago)

WHAT IN THE HELL IS A SIZE 28 SEX?

― thom west (thom w), Saturday, 25 January 2003 20:30 (twenty-three years ago)

Rubbish Smiles

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 26 January 2003 17:42 (twenty-three years ago)

What do you think about when you masticate?

Put me right off my dinner, I tells ya.

― Lara (Lara), Sunday, 26 January 2003 17:52 (twenty-three years ago)

'Convince me that I shouldn't eat men'

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 27 January 2003 13:03 (twenty-three years ago)

I read FACK YOU AMERICANS as Fuck You Americans. Ha ha.

― Pete (Pete), Monday, 27 January 2003 13:06 (twenty-three years ago)

Gazza is the new God.

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 27 January 2003 14:48 (twenty-three years ago)

Oh hang on...

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 27 January 2003 14:49 (twenty-three years ago)

Rubbish Smiles

― smee (smee), Monday, 27 January 2003 16:54 (twenty-three years ago)

I got a better one: Rubbish Similies!

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 27 January 2003 16:56 (twenty-three years ago)

Is that smilies there, or are you being clever again?

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Monday, 27 January 2003 17:03 (twenty-three years ago)

WHAT IN THE HELL IS A SIZE 28 SEX?

A stiffy so large that the easiest thing is just to measure it for a tuxedo.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Monday, 27 January 2003 17:07 (twenty-three years ago)

bitter living through acronyms

― jel -- (jel), Saturday, 1 February 2003 13:56 (twenty-three years ago)

olsen twins dead

― rainy (rainy), Sunday, 2 February 2003 07:48 (twenty-three years ago)

Tom Ewing is smoother than a trunk full of milk.

― rainy (rainy), Monday, 3 February 2003 08:52 (twenty-three years ago)

I also thought it was milk!

― kate, Monday, 3 February 2003 09:48 (twenty-three years ago)

I actually read it as a "truck full of milk" and thought "mmm, smooth"

― kate, Monday, 3 February 2003 09:48 (twenty-three years ago)

what do you do when you realize you are stuck at your "chosen profession"?

― jel -- (jel), Tuesday, 4 February 2003 22:18 (twenty-three years ago)

frank kogan needs to know the diff between a pubic hair

― Chris P (Chris P), Wednesday, 5 February 2003 02:33 (twenty-two years ago)

"horny"

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Wednesday, 5 February 2003 02:37 (twenty-two years ago)

I read this correctly: "Having cute girls barge into your room late at night telling you they've 'heard about your equipment'"

But misread the post: "Classic or Free Jizz?"

― Curtis Stephens, Wednesday, 5 February 2003 02:38 (twenty-two years ago)

This is the thread where we cure cancer.

― Wintermute (Wintermute), Thursday, 6 February 2003 13:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Mariah Carey: why is she black?

― g.cannon (gcannon), Thursday, 6 February 2003 15:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Don't blame Zodiac Mindwarp

― jel -- (jel), Thursday, 6 February 2003 18:15 (twenty-two years ago)

"this is the thread where we discuss the alternatives to evil"

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Friday, 7 February 2003 15:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Hovercraft - classic or dud?

― Alan (Alan), Friday, 7 February 2003 15:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Lesbian Cover Versions

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 9 February 2003 17:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Like TaTu's How Soon Is Now, presumably?

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Sunday, 9 February 2003 19:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Skipping 4228 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

Songs that give potted histories of sciences

― Webinar in Wetherspoons (Tom D.), Tuesday, 14 October 2025 18:05 (three months ago)

Songs that give potted histories of sciences

That's how I first read it--I was ready to add half a dozen They Might Be Giants songs.

― Hideous Lump, Tuesday, 14 October 2025 19:57 (three months ago)

The sun is a mass of incandescent gas

― putting the cad in decadent (Ye Mad Puffin), Tuesday, 14 October 2025 22:43 (three months ago)

Biota / Mennonites

― il lavoro mi rovina la giornata (PBKR), Friday, 17 October 2025 20:35 (three months ago)

Programming as a queer

― Labubu phalloplasty (Deflatormouse), Saturday, 18 October 2025 03:15 (three months ago)

flood youtube channels that are not terrible

― Webinar in Wetherspoons (Tom D.), Sunday, 19 October 2025 16:39 (three months ago)

terry collier: what do you think of him?

― Kim Kimberly, Sunday, 19 October 2025 16:49 (three months ago)

Do you have too many bad t-shirts?

― bored by endless ecstasy (anagram), Wednesday, 22 October 2025 08:39 (three months ago)

Throw It Down Bergman The 2025-26 NBA Regular Season Thread

― Webinar in Wetherspoons (Tom D.), Thursday, 30 October 2025 16:20 (three months ago)

places to put your penis

which makes dan worsley's suggestion:

15. Up someone else’s rectum
― Dan Worsley, Monday, November 3, 2025 12:03 PM (yesterday)

one that will likely prove popular with many people here, though my personal preference would be ppp's original suggestion 20 years ago now:

1) a glass jar

― Kate (rushomancy), Tuesday, 4 November 2025 14:24 (three months ago)

places to put your penis
which makes dan worsley's suggestion:
15. Up someone else’s rectum
― Dan Worsley, Monday, November 3, 2025 12:03 PM (yesterday)

yeah same

my personal preference would be ppp's original suggestion 20 years ago now:
1) a glass jar

omg :)

― Labubu phalloplasty (Deflatormouse), Tuesday, 4 November 2025 21:51 (three months ago)

two weeks pass...

tell me about your favourite teas

― Kim Kimberly, Wednesday, 19 November 2025 15:37 (two months ago)

Eating Comedies- S/D

― Tony Bubbles (Tom D.), Tuesday, 25 November 2025 21:09 (two months ago)

^^ otm

― sarahell, Tuesday, 25 November 2025 23:28 (two months ago)

This is a thread for ILXors ON THE MOON

― the way out of (Eazy), Saturday, 29 November 2025 21:52 (two months ago)

2025 Mannheim Steamroller Media Thread

― the way out of (Eazy), Wednesday, 10 December 2025 04:38 (one month ago)

allan holdsworth : what's the deal with his cat??

― cryptosicko, Sunday, 14 December 2025 12:37 (one month ago)

Keith Richards' THE MASTERMIND (2025)

― willem, Sunday, 14 December 2025 15:03 (one month ago)

IT’S POLLATIO TIME

― the way out of (Eazy), Monday, 15 December 2025 21:56 (one month ago)

What's Charles Windsor up to?

― Salted Peanuts (A Student's Plea) (Tom D.), Saturday, 20 December 2025 14:35 (one month ago)

How unquestionably accepting are you of new friends?

― Kim Kimberly, Tuesday, 23 December 2025 23:28 (one month ago)

(lol at holdsworth's cat posted above)

― Kim Kimberly, Tuesday, 23 December 2025 23:29 (one month ago)

The Two Ronettes: C/D

― Eric Blore Is President (James Redd and the Blecchs), Wednesday, 24 December 2025 17:21 (one month ago)

How unquestionably accepting are you of new friends?

I saw the exact same thing!

― trm (tombotomod), Wednesday, 24 December 2025 17:25 (one month ago)

Sinkholes can open up beneath canals.

I saw it as:

Sinkholes can open up beneath camels

― Hideous Lump, Wednesday, 24 December 2025 18:05 (one month ago)

Wrong thread, but close enough.

― Hideous Lump, Wednesday, 24 December 2025 18:06 (one month ago)

medieval school

― pee slowly and see (Deflatormouse), Thursday, 25 December 2025 07:36 (one month ago)

also:
OPO Poi Dog Pondering

― pee slowly and see (Deflatormouse), Thursday, 25 December 2025 07:38 (one month ago)

Ceefax Vibe: Into the Pynchon-Verse

― Kim Kimberly, Friday, 26 December 2025 16:39 (one month ago)

Scooter Jazz 2026

― budo jeru, Monday, 5 January 2026 17:45 (four weeks ago)

also:
OPO Poi Dog Pondering

Wait what?

― Eric Blore Is President (James Redd and the Blecchs), Monday, 5 January 2026 17:47 (four weeks ago)

from "OOP Plaid Dog Productions"

― Josefa, Monday, 5 January 2026 20:13 (four weeks ago)

COMPLAINTS about ROCKS

― the way out of (Eazy), Monday, 5 January 2026 21:20 (four weeks ago)

Carnac Music Recommendations?

― cryptosicko, Thursday, 8 January 2026 17:02 (three weeks ago)

Men, can you land a plane or scone against Serena Williams?

― Wry & Slobby (Portsmouth Bubblejet), Sunday, 11 January 2026 17:56 (three weeks ago)

I could definitely hit her with a baked good, yeah

― calmer chameleon (Ye Mad Puffin), Monday, 12 January 2026 00:29 (three weeks ago)

Who would you prefer to manage: Man Utd or Space?

― a ZX spectrum is haunting Europe (Daniel_Rf), Tuesday, 13 January 2026 09:01 (three weeks ago)

C'est la derrière fantaisie - talkin bout Clair Obscure Expedition 33 [

― Wearing red lipstick and maintaining a neutral expression (Tom D.), Wednesday, 14 January 2026 07:39 (three weeks ago)

Deseret Island Discs

― sarahell, Sunday, 18 January 2026 18:52 (two weeks ago)

The Martin Luther Thread

― Gentler Death Squads Please (Boring, Maryland), Tuesday, 20 January 2026 15:07 (two weeks ago)

The Long Overdue HARRY PARTCH Thread

― Gentler Death Squads Please (Boring, Maryland), Friday, 23 January 2026 15:39 (one week ago)

The Long Overdue LARRY STORCH Thread

― Hideous Lump, Friday, 23 January 2026 19:22 (one week ago)

Composting Containment Thread, every time.

― Maresn3st, Sunday, 25 January 2026 10:54 (one week ago)

raw like POLLshi: Neneh Cherry poll [Started

― the way out of (Eazy), Tuesday, 27 January 2026 03:51 (one week ago)

ILM's Top 77 Stocks of 2025

― Come On, (Eazy), Friday, 30 January 2026 05:50 (five days ago)

Before it's too late:

the pathetic president of the pathetic united states of america politics january 2026

― This is how the spicy nonsense becomes loose. (doo dah), Friday, 30 January 2026 23:48 (five days ago)

X-Men Deutschland - C/D

― The Yellow Kid, Friday, 30 January 2026 23:57 (five days ago)

The Best Feet Online (in-browser or downloadable)

― Come On, (Eazy), Saturday, 31 January 2026 20:13 (four days ago)

Best ever season for a retriever

― sarahell, Sunday, 1 February 2026 02:37 (three days ago)

^prob inspired by watching a cute video of tabes’ dog playing with another dog

― sarahell, Sunday, 1 February 2026 02:38 (three days ago)

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