Remote Control

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when I was a kid, remote control was confined to the TV and toy cars, but now there's remote controlled stereos, air conditioning units and when I was in Canada I discovered that they have remote control car ignition. But what would you like to be able to work by remote control but can't?

― MarkH (MarkH), Thursday, 16 January 2003 09:30 (twenty-three years ago)

Other people?

― N. (nickdastoor), Thursday, 16 January 2003 09:33 (twenty-three years ago)

The girlfriend's clitorus.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Thursday, 16 January 2003 09:33 (twenty-three years ago)

Nick S - have you not heard of remote-controlled panties?

― Lara, Thursday, 16 January 2003 09:34 (twenty-three years ago)

I'd like a remote control for the blind at the end of the office. The window is about 40 feet away and at about two in the afternoon I am blinded by the light. Jim, sitting next to me, experiences the same problem a few minutes earlier. I don't think anyone in the department actually by the window in question sits facing it and so they are oblivious to its effects on our poor retinae.

― MarkH (MarkH), Thursday, 16 January 2003 09:35 (twenty-three years ago)

Kettle.

― toraneko (toraneko), Thursday, 16 January 2003 09:38 (twenty-three years ago)

I'd like a remote control for the blind at the end of the office.

I read the above and thought 'hm, this can't be...correct.' but then I realised it was.

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 16 January 2003 09:40 (twenty-three years ago)

Ha ha.

What are you doing up anyway? I thought you were a man of leisure?

― Lara, Thursday, 16 January 2003 09:42 (twenty-three years ago)

first your boyf calls me rude and now this......................
you paint an ugly picture.

:'(

I'm going to school today to talk to a man about stuff. and I'll have to get a job soon, probably=no more leisure for me, soon. even though I have four remotely controllable devices of my very own.

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 16 January 2003 09:50 (twenty-three years ago)

Ooooh *four*. My man called you rude? I hope you slapped him one.

― Lara, Thursday, 16 January 2003 09:54 (twenty-three years ago)

Remote control photocopier and fax, so I don't have to get up and use them. But, there is the problem of how to transport the bits of paper to these devices. So, I would also need some sort of remote controlled paper/document carrier device. Hell, just replace me with robots, I don't care.

― jel -- (jel), Thursday, 16 January 2003 10:03 (twenty-three years ago)

Letter opener maybe.

― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 16 January 2003 10:30 (twenty-three years ago)

I'd like a remote control for the blind at the end of the office.

The technology exists -- over New Year's I stayed at a house that had these (the owner installed these for a living).

― j.lu (j.lu), Thursday, 16 January 2003 15:11 (twenty-three years ago)

?! Is it a growth industry?

Thing is, all I can think about is the game show...

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 16 January 2003 16:01 (twenty-three years ago)

I knew one cockfarmer who proudly pointed out that the CD player in his Porsche had a remote control. You couldn't get out of arm's reach of the CD player without getting out of the car.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Thursday, 16 January 2003 19:10 (twenty-three years ago)

?! Is it a growth industry?

No idea, although this guy's house was pretty nice. I suppose it appeals to yuppies who have spawned one or two precious rugrats and can be convinced to be afraid that baby might get fatally tangled up in blind cords.

― j.lu (j.lu), Thursday, 16 January 2003 19:15 (twenty-three years ago)

my wife

― Chris V. (Chris V), Thursday, 16 January 2003 19:18 (twenty-three years ago)

My cat almost got fatally tangled in the kitchen blind cords this morning.

Well, tangled. I'm not sure if it would have been fatally. I don't think there's much point in me getting a remote-control blind though.

― caitlin (caitlin), Thursday, 16 January 2003 19:19 (twenty-three years ago)

my wife

Why would you want to work your wife by remote control?

*settles in patiently, checks Perry-watch*

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 17 January 2003 02:46 (twenty-three years ago)

Thing is, all I can think about is the game show...

Argh. I still have that theme song memorized, just because it was so annoying.

― Nicole (Nicole), Friday, 17 January 2003 02:49 (twenty-three years ago)

It was also where Denis Leary was first unleashed on the world. Hm.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 17 January 2003 03:13 (twenty-three years ago)

Pah, ultimate capitalist tool of repression, they got you down and they want to keep you there etc.

― B.Rad (Brad), Friday, 17 January 2003 03:29 (twenty-three years ago)

DUH. You people and the complete missing the obvious all the time.

1. Traffic lights
2. Subways
3. Clocks

― Tom Millar (Millar), Friday, 17 January 2003 03:45 (twenty-three years ago)

Those people interested in remote control of wives should read Milo Manara's porn comic Click.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 17 January 2003 18:13 (twenty-three years ago)

Remote-control panties >>>>> remote-control wives.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 17 January 2003 18:16 (twenty-three years ago)

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