This is the thread where you tell me what to get my wife for Valentine's Day

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I got to get on this early because I'm a horrible gift-giver. I really am pathetic; I can never think of anything, and then VD comes along (which is never a good thing, right?) and I'm caught completely off guard, looking like the most horrible significant other on the planet, which I probably am. And chocolates are out of the question for a reason which I will tactfully not mention!

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 10:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Gift her with freedom.

― Lara (Lara), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 10:48 (twenty-two years ago)

buy her some records. Chicks dig music.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 10:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Touche.

― Lara (Lara), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 10:57 (twenty-two years ago)

VD?

― Graham (graham), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 11:05 (twenty-two years ago)

give her a kiss, yo.
that be smooth.

― g-kit (g-kit), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 12:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Heart-cut rubies. (Or garnets if rubies are out of the question. Or rhinestones if...)

― j.lu (j.lu), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 13:53 (twenty-two years ago)

or rabies if rhinestones...

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Or babies if rabies...

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:39 (twenty-two years ago)

I think it's a bit short notice for babies...

― smee (smee), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:40 (twenty-two years ago)

An iPod. Or region 0 dvd player!

If only Dan read ilxor, le sigh.

― Nicole (Nicole), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:40 (twenty-two years ago)

A copipod! (sic) Sorry, I just keep watching Blue Planet and I love the way DA says "copipod" (sic).

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:42 (twenty-two years ago)

If only Dan read ilxor, le sigh.

Write a message in lipstick all over the bathroom mirror.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 15:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Lipstixor

― Nick A. (Nick A.), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 15:33 (twenty-two years ago)

A vision.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 15:34 (twenty-two years ago)

My girlfriend told me what to get her but it's something so odd I can't tell if she's serious or yanking my chain.

I was going to make her a ceramic soup bowl with a love letter/poem written in a spiral on the inside. Does that sound hokie and lame?

― Stuart, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 15:45 (twenty-two years ago)

That sounds a terrific present!

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 19:01 (twenty-two years ago)

A striptease by yourself to Adam Ants "Strip". Works everytime

― Chris V. (Chris V), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 19:02 (twenty-two years ago)

two years pass...

bump

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 22:52 (twenty years ago)

Wow... people buy PRESENTS for valentines day!? Whats wrong with a simple heartfelt bit of writing, a lovely card, dinner, brekky in bed?

Im thinking of making my boi a little Flash animation.

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:01 (twenty years ago)

Nothing says I love you like a gift certificate for butt implants.

― nabisco (nabisco), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:02 (twenty years ago)

Or handing him his testicle on a plate.. whoops wrong thread.

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:04 (twenty years ago)

wine, dine, marijuana, desert, sex

― he does guitar with his mouth lmao mint (ex machina), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:05 (twenty years ago)

i'm taking my girlfriend out for dinner and im gonna make a card

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:09 (twenty years ago)

I like Jon's idea actually.

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:10 (twenty years ago)

there is no desert near me :(

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:11 (twenty years ago)

Every year we have an anti-Valentines day dinner with our friends hooked up and single. It's easy to get reservations 'cause the deuces are at a premium and a table for 10 is a cinch. It's our little rebellion against hollow, Hallmarky holidays. When I want to tell her I love her, I do and when I want to get her something nice, I do. There are 364 other days a year for love too.

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:13 (twenty years ago)

I am cooking lamb and maybe getting a love movie, like that one about the samurai.

― adam.r.l. (nordicskilla), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:15 (twenty years ago)

Haha, now my wife just tells me straight out and well ahead of time what she wants and where she wants to go so there's no mistake, thank god.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:16 (twenty years ago)

St Valentine died so we could fall in love Michael.

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:16 (twenty years ago)

Somehow every holiday gets co-opted so it's her day. I thought that was just supposed to be the wedding day, but I guess not.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:17 (twenty years ago)

Not that I mind that much.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:17 (twenty years ago)

Adam, you've given me an idea. A big dinner for me and my luv. I'll go all out. Yay! An excuse to cook :D

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:17 (twenty years ago)

Dan: I cant think of many times Ive gotten anythign but a card off a guy. Ive never been given flowers, romantic dinners or anything. Just cards and occasionaly some art. :(

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:18 (twenty years ago)

Women need to be shown that certain things are good for them, like Ratchet & Clank.

― adam.r.l. (nordicskilla), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:18 (twenty years ago)

Also I have hired one of those men in spats to come and sing Cole Porter material on our doorstep.

― adam.r.l. (nordicskilla), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:19 (twenty years ago)

Attention men: pls send PS2 games, I will be Very Impressed. kthxbye.

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:21 (twenty years ago)

St Valentine died so we could fall in love Michael.

Actually, he died for secretly marrying young people. The Emperor, Claudius II, if I recall correctly, felt that young men should be thinking of a career in the army and not the pleasures of the flesh nor the attractions of love and banned marriage.

I actually wrote my gf a poem about St. Valentine once. I approve of Lupercalian festivities, and Saint Valentine seems no worse than many of the denizens of hagiography but I hate the coercive commercialism and saccharine sentimentality associated with the holiday. St. Valentine's patronage includes the following:

affianced couples, against fainting, bee keepers, betrothed couples, engaged couples, epilepsy, fainting, greeting card manufacturers, greetings, happy marriages, love, lovers, plague, travellers, young people

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:48 (twenty years ago)

I misread and thought that was a list of things you hated along with Valentine's day

― kyle (akmonday), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:51 (twenty years ago)

ah, the plague

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:52 (twenty years ago)

Bloody apiculturists!! *Waves fist*

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 23:52 (twenty years ago)

Get her a plague of fainting bees as a present! Perfect!

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Wednesday, 9 February 2005 10:27 (twenty years ago)

Or an epileptic band of beekeeping Romany.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Wednesday, 9 February 2005 10:33 (twenty years ago)

What about bees in a plastic cigar tube?

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Wednesday, 9 February 2005 17:09 (twenty years ago)

or the dogs that have bees in their mouths so that when they bark they shoot bees at you

― sgs (sgs), Wednesday, 9 February 2005 18:07 (twenty years ago)

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