Immature joke corner

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Old Mcdonald had a cockfarm, e i e i o...

Submit your worst/tackiest/lamest jokes here.

― Nicole, Saturday, 23 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Why did the beach blush?

Coz the seaweed.

― james e l, Saturday, 23 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I posted this one on ILM too but I think that thread was fairly well dead by that time, so in case you missed it, here's my favourite lame joke.

Mickey and Minnie Mouse are in divorce court. The judge looks over his papers sternly, furrows his brow, and says to Mickey, "Now, let me get this straight, what you're telling us is that your wife has gone crazy?"

Mickey responds, "No judge! what I SAID is that she's fucking Goofy!" *ba dum dum*

― Kim, Saturday, 23 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

It would take too long to type. But the punchline is that the billboard shows Christ crumpled in a heap at the foot of the cross and while the disciples look on in horror, a centurion looks out at the world and shruggingly says, "Ya shoulda used Schultz's Nails!"

Um, anyway. This is what comes from growing up in the early eighties in junior high when the _Truly Tasteless Jokes_ books were everywhere.

― Ned Raggett, Saturday, 23 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

This one is HORRIBLE - be forewarned.

What did the little deaf, dumb, and blind boy get for Christmas this year?

Cancer.

Also in such terrible taste that I can't believe that I'm going to post it -

What does a girl from the trailer park say during sex?

Get off me Dad, you're crushing my smokes!

― Kim, Sunday, 24 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I don't get that cancer one, actually. I know it ruins things to explain it.

― Ally, Sunday, 24 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Yeah, that kind of is the point. You're sitting there waiting for the person to come up with a clever punchline and then the answer is instead the unbearable added tragedy "cancer" which throws the person hearing the joke - you know, like you're expecting the deaf dumb blind thing to just be a typically bad taste set up - not an anti- joke. Am I over explaining this? Maybe it works better in person.

― Kim, Sunday, 24 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

How about racist jokes? I have very many of those...

― JM, Monday, 25 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Cancer joke = bathos = very funny!!

― AP, Monday, 25 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

A favorite from high school in the 70s:

What's brown and sits on the stage of the Felt Forum?

Uriah's Heep

― Arthur, Monday, 25 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I would like to respectfully request that we don't go down the slippery slope represented by racial jokes. It's FAR too easy to get your feelings hurt that way.

― Dan Perry, Monday, 25 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Told to me by my 11 year old daughter: Q: What's black and blue and white all over ? A: A nun falling down the stairs

― michele, Monday, 25 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Q: How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: That's not funny.

― masonic boom, Monday, 25 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

did you hear that band Eczema?

they're really irritating...

blame Silver Springs for that one.

how many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

two but they have to be dead small.

blame me for that one.

― katie, Monday, 25 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

That feminist joke kept me warm on many a college evening. Another fave:

What does an elephant use for a tampon?
A sheep.

― Dan Perry, Monday, 25 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Kim - love that one; in Knoxville "smokes" was "Marlboro Lights". That made it funnier for some reason.

― Tracer Hand, Monday, 25 June 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

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