Clumsiness

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Does being clumsy suck or can it be cute? If someone is clumsy naturally, does it make it harder to believe when something actually accidental-not-their-clumsy-fault happens to them that it had nothing to do with being clumsy? Is there a fine line between clumsy-endearing and clumsy-I'm-going-to-beat-the-shit-out-of-you? Should it replace stupid covetousness as a deadly sin?

― Ally, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Asked, incidentally, because myself and another female coworker are easily the clumsiest people alive, regularly walking into walls, doors, cabinets, and falling for no reason (she once managed to fall INTO A TREE on the street). We always try to come up with an excuse ("There was a pull in the rug", "Ooh, these damn shoes", etc), but everyone knows they are excuses so when something genuinely not the fault of clumsiness happens to us, everyone is suspicious. This morning I was standing fidgeting a little in my boss's office and apropos of nothing the strap on my shoe popped and I lost my balance and fell, knocking over a pile of shit. So he's like, "What the hell? Are you okay?" I'm all, "My shoe broke!" and he was like, "Aye, right, whatever". I had to literally throw my leg on the desk and show the broken strap. No one else believed me either! I had to show people why I fell because they all just assumed I spazzed out.

― Ally, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Cruel as it sounds, I wish to see this dual clumsiness of yours in action one day whenever I visit next, as I am Sad and desire only Cheap Laughs.

I don't think I've known anyone naturally clumsy, I just allow for the usual amount of having the sidewalk rise up and trip you scenarios.

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I think I'm more absentminded or nervous than clumsy. I only walk into walls when my mind is very far away. I only walk into desks or people when I'm anxious to avoid them and make a good impression. Maybe that's the definition of clumsy, though. (The walking into walls is cute , the other isn't.)

― Lyra, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I walk into coffee tables a lot too. I remember when said coworker came home with me so we could change to go to Madonna and we both walked into the same spot on the coffee table within 5 minutes of each other. Then I spilt tonic everywhere so we ended up drinking wicked strong vodka tonics. And we both got mascara all over the place somehow. It was like some sort of evil force was taking over my house.

Oddly, this lack of grace doesn't stop us from being able to run in high heels and dance decently well, or put on eyeliner straight. It makes no sense.

― Ally, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I am very messy and also quite clumsy. If I concentrate though for a really vital task like carrying three pints at once I can get away with it, but I always relax as I approach the table and get lager all down my sleeve.

― Tom, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I think I used to be clumsy. Not so much anymore. I am a mess though.

― jel, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I tend to be pretty clumsy when I wake up - walking sideways into furniture and so on - and then progressively improve with caffine. The fifth or sixth cup is normally counterproductive on he clumsiness front, though, and by far the more irritating variety.

― He's Not, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I hear clumsiness is a symptom of being a tart

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

If they were already endearing the clumsiness might be clumsy endearing. If they were already irritating then......

― Ronan, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Women are funny when they fall over, but it's a drag when they start crying, and expect you to be sympathetic. I mean, it's their fault for being clumsy.

― dave q, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Classic except when it hurts. I go through these phases of hitting my head on things. except, come to think of, when I do clumsy things (which is often) it almost always hurts, so dud. (Unless anyone finds it cute, of course ;)

― Bill, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I am extremely clumsy, and it feels very embarrassing, but I've never really noticed anyone else doing anything clumsy, so maybe that means that people aren't really laughing at me every time I do something clumsy. Maybe. It certainly means I can't say whether it's endearing or annoying in other people. I had a friend who'd always put glasses and mugs down on tables about 50 times harder than was necessary, which always made me think they'd break and gently annoyed me, but I'm not sure that really counts as clumsiness, it's probably just being more assertive than I am.

― Rebecca, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I used to be very clumsy but I've got a lot better over the last five years. I still don't fit my body that well though. Most of my movements are ungainly and my running can still make people laugh.

Having said that, other people's specific clumsinesses can drive me mad. Eg my ex used to consistently knock over wine glasses to the point where there seemed to be a permanent pile of salt on my carpet.

― Richard Tunnicliffe, Thursday, 30 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

i don't walk into stuff often. i am very prone to dropping cups of tea all over myself. i'm pretty clumsy, but i've learnt to live with it.

― lady die, Friday, 31 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I used to fall over a bit when I was drunk but now seem to have found my drunken balance. I am always falling off heels though, I have some kitten heel slingbacks but the slingback bit isn't very supportive and my foot is always falling off the shoe. I am sure men find this utterly charming. I have never ever broken a bone so I can't be that bad.

― Emma, Friday, 31 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Just because I am unbreakable does not mean I don't break stuff. Actually I'm not very clumsy, though I can be a wee bit messy when I'm cooking (which is a completely difference question). The only time I am clumbsy is when someone who is less clumsy than me scrutinises me - and I think this may be a bit of a universal. Clumsiness is about self consciousness right?

― Pete, Friday, 31 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

three months pass...

Boy oh boy. I jyst knocked over my boyfriend's surround speakers (again) and a lamp we have in the living room. The suroound sound speakers are sort of on the way, but he's very gentle with them, and is very particular about his audio /stereo equipment. I managed to knock it down twice already , scratched one with a chair, knocked down that lamp by the speaker. I hate it. I . of course , don't do it on purpose, but it's just so embarassing.. because you know he's very particular with that... I am also always bumping on things, doors, walls, etc. My arms/hands seem also too heavy, everytime I do the dishes it seems like I always drop them too heavily on the dishwasher and it always seems I am going to break them , even though I don't break dishes that often... What else...That's about it.. It really upsets me though because people really get upset at you, even if it's not on purpose.. Is there a cure for it? Any treatments, therapies???

― Raquel, Tuesday, 4 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Walked into a glass wall that sectioned out part of a revolving door. Then I got confused and did it again. It was so fucking clear.

― Sterling Clover, Tuesday, 4 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

one year passes...

Clumsiness can be very dangerous. My foot is still hurting from when I walked into a chair and subsequently kind of tripped over it.

It is much more annoying than it is endearing, because I think clumsiness has a lot to do with people having their head in the clouds and not paying attention to what is going on around them.

― Nicole (Nicole), Monday, 28 April 2003 13:23 (twenty-two years ago)

ahem

― Kim (Kim), Monday, 28 April 2003 21:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Slight clumsiness in otherwise highly pretentious people is sometimes the most endearing thing about them.

― felicity (felicity), Monday, 28 April 2003 22:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Clumsiness is best in moderation. I like when I am able to occasionally overcome my natural lack of any athletic ability whatsoever and make some kind of incredibly amazing recovery from what would normally just be a hideously stupid accident.

― Millar (Millar), Monday, 28 April 2003 22:12 (twenty-two years ago)

I walked into a very clear glass door the other week and still have a mild lump above my right eyebrow.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Monday, 28 April 2003 22:58 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't think I'm clumsy as much as I am spastic. I tend to make sudden movements and bang the shit out of things. But my most memorable ouch was when I once was peeking out of the peephole in my front door and forgot to take my face away when I went to open the door.

― Carey (Carey), Tuesday, 29 April 2003 00:39 (twenty-two years ago)

five months pass...

Update: I somehow just managed to fall while making copies.

Knocking over a half-eaten ice cream cake in the process.

― Allyzay, Tuesday, 28 October 2003 20:14 (twenty-two years ago)

I think that officially pushes me past the fine line of clumsy-endearing into clumsy-I'm-going-to-beat-the-shit-out-of-you.

― Allyzay, Tuesday, 28 October 2003 20:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Not if you run away fast enough.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 28 October 2003 20:24 (twenty-two years ago)

making copies requires lots of lateral movement. tennis shoes are recommended.

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Tuesday, 28 October 2003 20:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Making copies really does require a bit of physical effort. Especially if you have to fight over the machine. People are always running up trying to bump me out of the way.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 28 October 2003 20:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Clumsiness is best in moderation.

If only I had some control over this.

It's funny that this thread got revived just now; five minutes ago I walked face-first into the corner of a door, knocked the lens out of my glasses, put it back in, turned to walk to my room and walked right back into the corner of the door. God damnit.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 28 October 2003 20:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh, I wish I had such an excuse. It was just me, standing there, kind of singing a song to myself, just very slightly rocking a bit, making copies of some bank cards. Then BAM!! Total spaz out heel slips out from underneath me and I go flying backwards into the little table holding the fax machine and the cake and it all went to shit.

On the upside this is the first time I've done anything this completely ridiculously clumsy in a long time, my clumsiness seems to have given way to occasional tripping over nothing in the street and walking my head straight into the cabinet in my kitchen. I was feeling so much better about myself.

― Allyzay, Tuesday, 28 October 2003 20:30 (twenty-two years ago)

what song were you singing?

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 28 October 2003 20:39 (twenty-two years ago)

That makes the story even more embarassing; I have "You're the One that I Want" from Grease in my head because my coworker D*** was listening to it this morning and I was singing that.

When I fell making copies and knocked a goddamned cake onto myself.

This is possibly the least metrosexual thing I could've done today.

― Allyzay, Tuesday, 28 October 2003 20:41 (twenty-two years ago)

Did you then stick your finger in the cake and lick it? And then smile? And was there a loud "WAH WAH" sound?

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 28 October 2003 20:42 (twenty-two years ago)

I slipped on a banana skin

I just wanted to point out that apparently Gareth and I exist in some kind of bad comic book.

― Allyzay, Tuesday, 28 October 2003 20:44 (twenty-two years ago)

BTW I am waiting patiently for the clown orgy joke.

― Allyzay, Tuesday, 28 October 2003 20:56 (twenty-two years ago)

If I'd seen this thread earlier, I would have made it sooner!

"Every time I see ice cream cake in Ally's hair, I just want to put my ASS in it!"

(I want to hear more about Sarah's Streetfighter exploits at the copier. I have images of her shouting "SPINNING STAR KICK!" a la Chun Li.)

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 28 October 2003 20:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Jeezus Chreyest! I just reached for a Kleenex and knocked-over-and-spilled this like 32 oz. cup of water all over a stack of (copies, luckily) finance agreements. AWESOME.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 28 October 2003 21:14 (twenty-two years ago)

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