How To Hide Your Alarm Clock

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OR: Ways to set one's sleep schedule straight.

Since I already know the correct answer involves proper exercise, a good diet, the avoidance of foodstuffs 2-3 hrs before getting tucked in, and other practical nonsense, please post convoluted ways & means to accomplish this seemingly simple task.

I've been up since 2 PM (it's 5 in the morn) and I've class in 5 hours. Your assistance is urgent and key!

― David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 10:05 (twenty-two years ago)

You know, I just realized that I miss being tucked in. Sniff. Growing up really sucks.

― David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 10:06 (twenty-two years ago)

I read this as How To Hide Your Alarm Cock. Which says way more about me than it ought to.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 10:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Always sleep in four-hour slots. Apparently a full sleep cycle lasts approximately four fours so, if you sleep for five hours you are woken when you are heading into a period of deep sleep and therefore groggy and disoriented. If you wake after four hours (or eight, or twelve etc.) you generally feel fine.

I comply to this rule and end up staying up watching TV or reading until the requisite 'four hours before I have to get up' time. Seems to work for me.

Anyone posting about the black circles under my eyes WILL BE SHOT.

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 10:19 (twenty-two years ago)

I get 8 hours a night approx., and never have any black circles under my eyes. Unlike Little Miss Panda-Eyed Tomb Raider.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 10:26 (twenty-two years ago)

*Ducks*

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 10:27 (twenty-two years ago)

*Geese*

*shoots from the hip*

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 10:53 (twenty-two years ago)

What the fuck have geese got to do with it? My mum's scared of birds.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 10:55 (twenty-two years ago)

*Cormorants*

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 10:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Hey - why aren't you dead?

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 10:56 (twenty-two years ago)

You have to throw shags. Fnar.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 10:59 (twenty-two years ago)

*smothers Nick with phenomenal breasts*

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Watch out you'll have his eye out with those.

― Ed (dali), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:08 (twenty-two years ago)

*pop*

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I really don't want to know what it was that just burst.

― Ed (dali), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Wasn't part of me. And I've ruined my vest.

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Tis FAR too early.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:13 (twenty-two years ago)

*exerts more pressure*

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Theres not much material to it, it can't have cost much, and Nick S will now have to look more like Momus.

― Ed (dali), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:34 (twenty-two years ago)

And poor David R still can't fucking sleep.

If it's any consolation, you're meant to have fucked-up sleeping patterns at uni.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:36 (twenty-two years ago)

If it's any consolation, you're meant to have fucked-up sleeping patterns at uni.

No one told me this. Is this where I went wrong?

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Yes.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:39 (twenty-two years ago)

B-b-but you have all the time in the world to sleep when you are at university. It's only now that a little bit of shut-eye is precious.

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:41 (twenty-two years ago)

Taht's entirely true, but the time you have for sleeping at university is not necessarily during the night, is it? There are clubs to be dancing at, drugs to be taken, trips to London with stolen garden accoutrements to be undertaken, shagging to be done, philosophical treatises to be debated, red wine to be drunk, eggs to be fried in absinthe, kahlua milkshakes to be blended, records to be listened to, essays to be written...

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Are you me?

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Possibly.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:56 (twenty-two years ago)

God, I'm ugly.

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Oooooh, get you.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 11:59 (twenty-two years ago)

sleep at uni? Isn't that what they invented speed for? And cheap 50 cent coffee at the snack bar?

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 15:07 (twenty-two years ago)

You crazy people, you crazy!

I just find that after setting yer alarm to wake you up at a particular time that after about a week you tend to wake up at that time naturally. This has proven handy.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 15:30 (twenty-two years ago)

How not to get sleep: go out drinking all night with ILXers, then set your alarm for 8:30, then realize as you awake that you have a conference call for 9.

― hstencil, Wednesday, 19 February 2003 15:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Also, please remember to turn the volume on your clock radio UP (that is, towards the fat part of the volume wedge) instead of DOWN (towards the anorexic part of the wedge) unless you like waking up after your class has concluded.

― David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 19 February 2003 16:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Tis FAR too early.

I read this as "Tits FAR too early", suggesting that Nick didn't mind the inevitable appearance of Lara's bosom on this thread, but would like to talk about sleep patterns for a bit. Just five more minutes...

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Thursday, 20 February 2003 13:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Just five more minutes... with Lara's bosoms, maybe...

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Thursday, 20 February 2003 13:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I've missed every lesson this week through not getting up.

― Graham (graham), Thursday, 20 February 2003 13:31 (twenty-two years ago)

But what have you learned?

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Thursday, 20 February 2003 13:46 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't need an alarm because my cat goes insane and will make an enormous amount of racket if I'm not up by six. So getting an annoying cat is always an option.

― Nicole (Nicole), Thursday, 20 February 2003 13:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Graham, I did Chemistry at uni and lectures were supposed to be night on compulsory. I had three lectures a day for eight weeks a term for three terms a year for three years. I went to about twenty of them and got a 2:1. Don't worry about it.

― SittingPretty (sittingpretty), Thursday, 20 February 2003 14:30 (twenty-two years ago)

night? Try "nigh". Ahthangyew.

― SittingPretty (sittingpretty), Thursday, 20 February 2003 14:30 (twenty-two years ago)

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