has your aptitude at matters of the heart (to put it queasily) improved since your teens?

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i feel i'm at about the same stage. i fall fast, i don't trust my judgement re. whether someone is interested in me or not, i scarcely know how to make a move, i drop silly hints to her friends, i ask her about herself nearly to the point of irritation, i daydream, but little more.

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:38 (twenty years ago)

i have a terrible urge to confess. and to drink.

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:38 (twenty years ago)

(it's hard to live in the coun-try)

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:39 (twenty years ago)

i may have had something to drink already.

please no brits with tales of shaggy haired bassists or whatever.

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:41 (twenty years ago)

god yes

― the surface noise (slight return) (electricsound), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:44 (twenty years ago)

about 100000000000000x more improved

― the surface noise (slight return) (electricsound), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:45 (twenty years ago)

i am happy for you

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:47 (twenty years ago)

more complicated, more "adult," but little improved.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:50 (twenty years ago)

gah kenan she is so awesome

she wears ascots

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:51 (twenty years ago)

i don't know how to react to that.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:52 (twenty years ago)

well actually not ascots

scarves

but i like typing "ascots"

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:53 (twenty years ago)

well shit, *I* wear scarves. It just has to be cold, is all.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:54 (twenty years ago)

i scarcely know how to make a move

This key point has not changed for me much since high school, sadly.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:56 (twenty years ago)

ornamental scarves with lots of colors you know girly scarves

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:56 (twenty years ago)

i am going to get drunk in 1taly and accost her

p.s. no i'm not

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:56 (twenty years ago)

hey, when in rome, man.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:57 (twenty years ago)

or even near it.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:57 (twenty years ago)

Great line one of my friends used to convince a girl to go to Rome with him: "I want to make love to you in ancient places."

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:58 (twenty years ago)

exactly the same. its ok though. i found someone as impaired as me.

― gaz (gaz), Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:59 (twenty years ago)

I've grown to be good at bad chicks but I'm still very bad at good chicks. Hence the health!

― LC, Sunday, 3 October 2004 06:59 (twenty years ago)

gaz has found the key to happiness.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:00 (twenty years ago)

what if your mutual incompetence just prevents what should happen from happening?

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:01 (twenty years ago)

Then you attack her.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:02 (twenty years ago)

A little adolescent lust and guilessness goes a long way. Most girls just want to be liked, same as anybody.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:03 (twenty years ago)

I know it's not that simple, but still.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:05 (twenty years ago)

do they want to be liked by an ogre like me?*

*i am not actually convinced i am an ogre, but i am convince that others think me an ogre.

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:06 (twenty years ago)

...

i am amazed at her smartness.

this is significant, because i tend to think everyone is stupid and boring.

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:08 (twenty years ago)

i am going to go listen to the smiths and the fall in alternation

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:10 (twenty years ago)

"ogre" is a great word. better than "ascot," even.

seriously, relax, dude. This is why alcohol is the great social lubricant. It turns off your brain enough that you can do what needs to be done. Be a teenager! For initiating sexy activity, this is not a bad plan.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:11 (twenty years ago)

wait... she doesn't own a chihuahua, does she? You should ask that first.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:12 (twenty years ago)

she speaks russ1an

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:14 (twenty years ago)

Am, I was having this *exact* same thought on my way home tonight.

― jaymc (jaymc), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:16 (twenty years ago)

Actually, I take that back: it wasn't exact.

― jaymc (jaymc), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:16 (twenty years ago)

But I was thinking about me and relationships and various barriers to them in my life.

― jaymc (jaymc), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:17 (twenty years ago)

I actually think I developed an emotionally sustainable approach to love for the first time last week.

It made me feel about a million times smarter, and happier to boot.

― Laura E (laurae55), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:18 (twenty years ago)

Jessa speaks a little Russian. Enough to get around, anyway. We have these ass-old "learn Russian!" records laying around somewhere.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:18 (twenty years ago)

she likes arch1tecture

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:19 (twenty years ago)

otm

― gaz (gaz), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:19 (twenty years ago)

she doesnt seem like the drinking type, but we'll see

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:20 (twenty years ago)

i barely even know her

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:21 (twenty years ago)

I guess I did think, when I was dancing toward the end of the night, how I always feel so sheepish dancing around attractive women: that whole kind of flirty dancing makes me nervous -- and in that sense, I haven't "improved." I would have no idea how to "pull" women at bars/clubs. (This despite alcohol.)

― jaymc (jaymc), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:21 (twenty years ago)

it only takes the once.

― gaz (gaz), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:21 (twenty years ago)

if it means anything coming from me, am, you seem like a pretty lovable guy. nothing like an ogre at all.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:22 (twenty years ago)

she is a huge nerd, i think i really ought to stick with the huge nerds as far as crushes go

thanks k3nan

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:23 (twenty years ago)

haha killco is kenan? i am so lost these days. he's right again!

― gaz (gaz), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:24 (twenty years ago)

how would you know gaz?

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:25 (twenty years ago)

i'm in constant identity flux.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:25 (twenty years ago)

my ears are not symmetrically aligned

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:25 (twenty years ago)

haha

yeah, you must be unworthy of human contact, then.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:27 (twenty years ago)

you seem like a pretty lovable guy ???

you do seem like a nice guy ams. am i wrong?

― gaz (gaz), Sunday, 3 October 2004 07:28 (twenty years ago)

Skipping 120 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

or don johnson? or billie dee williams?

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Monday, 4 October 2004 19:01 (twenty years ago)

am!! ASK HER OUT!! SHE WANTS YOU TO!

― s1ocki (slutsky), Monday, 4 October 2004 19:03 (twenty years ago)

the friend thing has forced the moment to its crisis!

― s1ocki (slutsky), Monday, 4 October 2004 19:04 (twenty years ago)

s1ocki do you think so?

i will be in 1taly with her (and her friend and other folks) so perhaps i can get her to have an espresso w/me on the sly

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Monday, 4 October 2004 19:06 (twenty years ago)

No, it was NOIZE DUDE Ian. He was one of many people that I was trying to rescue from an impending natural disaster by getting them to go into the surprisingly large, luxurious cellar of a nearby house.

― n/a (Nick A.), Monday, 4 October 2004 19:07 (twenty years ago)

Oh just quit thinking about it and blatantly ask the girl out already.

― oops (Oops), Monday, 4 October 2004 19:07 (twenty years ago)

and then you doused them with gasoline and dropped a match à la the dirty dozen

xpost

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Monday, 4 October 2004 19:08 (twenty years ago)

(you googleproofed 1taly?)

but yes, i do think so. i think you have so much more to gain by going for it (and that comment you said she made seems to seal it for me)

― s1ocki (slutsky), Monday, 4 October 2004 19:08 (twenty years ago)

You should eat some spaghetti with her, Lady-and-the-Tramp-style, if you know what I'm sayin'.

― n/a (Nick A.), Monday, 4 October 2004 19:11 (twenty years ago)

slocki otm

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 4 October 2004 19:15 (twenty years ago)

Results 1 - 10 of about 190 for italy ascots architecture. (1.01 seconds)

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Monday, 4 October 2004 19:17 (twenty years ago)

Results 1 - 10 of about 52,400 for stop dicking around on the internet and ask her out already. (0.50 seconds)

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 4 October 2004 19:24 (twenty years ago)

i'll see her next week

i'm just marking time really

(i should be studying for gres)

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Monday, 4 October 2004 19:25 (twenty years ago)

I'm sorry if this sounds rude, but this thread reads to me as the equivalent of kate's horny comiseration thread. Which isn't exactly bad, either, but y'know.

― hstencil (hstencil), Monday, 4 October 2004 20:15 (twenty years ago)

In what way?

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 4 October 2004 20:18 (twenty years ago)

they kinda read the same. Two lonely people, looking for something, etc.

― hstencil (hstencil), Monday, 4 October 2004 20:19 (twenty years ago)

x-post
You'll be abroad with her? It sounds like it's in the bag. I'm sure she likes you. You're cute! Now you just need to focus on what to wear during your trip and how to do your hair. ha ha

By the way, thanks for the present. I need to give it a really good listen and get educated in soul music.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Monday, 4 October 2004 20:27 (twenty years ago)

Sarah, he is not a girl. He shouldn't be thinking about clothes and hair, he should be thinking about dorky mix cds to make for her or bumbling yet charming pick-up lines. That is what dudes do.

― n/a (Nick A.), Monday, 4 October 2004 20:33 (twenty years ago)

I'm sorry if this sounds rude, but this thread reads to me as the equivalent of kate's horny comiseration thread.

Everybody wants somethin'.

I started the horny thread, BTW. It did quickly get taken over by Kate, tho.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Monday, 4 October 2004 20:55 (twenty years ago)

oh sheesh, my bad. Still.

― hstencil (hstencil), Monday, 4 October 2004 20:57 (twenty years ago)

She carried it further toward its logical conclusion than I would have. I think it belongs to her now.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Monday, 4 October 2004 20:59 (twenty years ago)

narcissim, small differences, etc.

― hstencil (hstencil), Monday, 4 October 2004 20:59 (twenty years ago)

all the way around, yes.

― Gold Teeth II (kenan), Monday, 4 October 2004 21:07 (twenty years ago)

i drop silly hints to her friends

this is so OTM it's painful, but kind of a relief to discover I'm not the only one.

― Matt (Matt), Monday, 4 October 2004 21:11 (twenty years ago)

FWIW, I don't really get crushes any more. Ephemeral erotic fantasies, yes. Crushes, no.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Monday, 4 October 2004 23:17 (twenty years ago)

(this is something of a bittersweet blessing)

― Remy (x Jeremy), Monday, 4 October 2004 23:17 (twenty years ago)

sarah you are most welcome

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Tuesday, 5 October 2004 00:37 (twenty years ago)

back on topic: i'm WAY more neurotic now. i just internalize it more.

― pfeffernuesse (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 5 October 2004 01:42 (twenty years ago)

I don't know what it's like to be single really. I've always been in a long-term relationship. But realisticly, I doubt I would be out partying with my six closest female friends, getting wasted on fruity drinks and hooking up. If I wanted to meet guys I'd probably, uh, start a band?

I'm a lot less melodramatic than I used to be. After one breakup in high school, I vowed never to be in a relationship again. I think that lasted about a month. But anyway, there was that bit of time when I wrote horrible poems about never being able to find my soulmate my whole life, then dieing alone. You know, the usual.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 5 October 2004 12:55 (twenty years ago)

you should set them to music and make a concept album!

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Tuesday, 5 October 2004 16:58 (twenty years ago)

It would work a lot better if I were goth.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 5 October 2004 17:10 (twenty years ago)

you can go goth for one album only, sort of like garth brooks

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Tuesday, 5 October 2004 17:10 (twenty years ago)

Yeah, because that was a big success.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 5 October 2004 17:11 (twenty years ago)

you too can be in cut-out bins throughout the far northwest side!

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Tuesday, 5 October 2004 17:13 (twenty years ago)

this thread has strayed far from ascots and neck-licking

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Tuesday, 5 October 2004 17:14 (twenty years ago)

You don't associate those with garth (I mean, Chris??)?

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 5 October 2004 17:17 (twenty years ago)

Garth goth.

― n/a (Nick A.), Tuesday, 5 October 2004 17:33 (twenty years ago)

At risk of digging back up something which probably should stay burried, but still, I wasn't here to comment at the time.

Yeah, seriously, hstencil on the money. Two lonely people dealing with it in different ways.

I mean, what *should* I be doing? Lying around being all twee and whinging about how I'm too romantically incompetant to get a date or get over my broken heart? Does that really make me, or anyone else around me any happier? What actually gives me that kind of a serotonin kick that makes me get out of bed and take the razor from my fucking vein? Lying around living out Smiths lyrics and being neurotic, or looking at NME scenester pr0n? Guess which one works better for me.

I've wasted too much of my life being depressed and I'm sick of feeling sorry for myself. You know what? Yeah, my teens *were* a long time ago, and I don't have to be that person any more. Are you gonna wallow in your own self pity or are you going to transcend it? OK, so I have a bit of a strange way of transcending, (the path of excess leads to Willesdon) but you know, whatever works for you.

― the path of excess leads to Willesdon, Wednesday, 6 October 2004 09:39 (twenty years ago)

anyway

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Wednesday, 6 October 2004 15:50 (twenty years ago)

two weeks pass...

i've reached that stage where after devoting too much thought to the matter and having finally achieved step one (getting a "date" more or less/being somewhat confident that she likes me), i start wondering why i devoted so much thought to it when i don't really know the person all that well. it's like your eyesight clears up and you realize it wasn't your eyesight, the person actually is kind of a blur to you. i guess that's what the date is for.

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 24 October 2004 17:07 (twenty years ago)

this repeats a familiar pattern for me: crushing on someone, getting them to notice you, then idly (disastrously?) wondering if their friend with whom you share a laugh more easily and spontaneously isn't the person you should be attracted to.

life is weird.

― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 24 October 2004 17:08 (twenty years ago)

I don't know but I don't think so.

― RJG (RJG), Monday, 25 October 2004 02:27 (twenty years ago)

I don't think so either.

― Cathy (Cathy), Monday, 25 October 2004 02:29 (twenty years ago)

i haven't had a crush in twelve years, and i'm a eunuch.

life is wonderful here.

― John (jdahlem), Monday, 25 October 2004 02:34 (twenty years ago)

aim?

― s1ocki (slutsky), Monday, 25 October 2004 02:35 (twenty years ago)

When I was a teenager, girls threw themselves at me, so I learned nothing. No really. Now women barely look twice at me, except desparate ones, so I still know nothing. And it's frustrating, because there's a certain dating aptitude I suspect you're supposed to have I don't. It's either straight to bed (too infrequently unfortunately) or more typically complete ineptitude with the sophisticated women I'd like to hang around with.

― joey lawrence, Monday, 25 October 2004 02:35 (twenty years ago)

I haven't had a date since the year 2000.

― battlin' green eyeshades (Homosexual II), Monday, 25 October 2004 02:36 (twenty years ago)

nope. i've always been completely shitful at matters of the heart. it's not something i expect to improve at to be perfectly honest.

― gem (trisk), Monday, 25 October 2004 02:38 (twenty years ago)

:-)

― amateur!!st, Tuesday, 2 November 2004 23:44 (twenty years ago)

sarah have you listened more to t hat soul cd???

now that i have a cd burner i can copy you guys some more stuff. like, lots, if you so desire. i have like 200 soul cds.

― amateur!!st, Tuesday, 2 November 2004 23:57 (twenty years ago)

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