Cocktail Class System

High Class: Martinis, Manhattans, Gin & Tonics, Chartreuse, Pastis, etc. [only top-shelf, please]

Trashy Hos: Tequila Sunrises, Midori Sours, Sex on a Beach, Margaritas, Lemon Drops, Kamikazes, B-52s.

A little better, but not by much: Apple Martinis, Cosmopolitans. Mojitos, Caipirhinas.

Why exactly do margaritas make for "trashy hos"? See also: mojitos, caipirhinas. Is the entirety of central/south America "trashy hos"? That's kind of silly. Not a one of these in their traditional forms says anything negative about the drinker at all, in my opinion. Yes, now a days you can get Big Gulp sized flavored margaritas at Fridays, but basically having ANY drink at Fridays makes you a trashy ho.

Are you accusing me of being a alco-racist? Because some of my favorite drinks are Latino!

I want to be a kind of dreadlocked Noel Coward leaning with my dry martini against the piano at the Savoy. (Savoy cocktail book is surely the best even if it features no vodka at all, it was the 30s though)

ultra dry martinis are at the top (as close to straight booze as you can get)

the more combos that go in and more complicated it gets the less classy. 2 thinks are the rule i think (martinis, vodka tonics, g&t) camp. & gin= negroni right?

also less sugar is a key thing, so the next step is eliminate all mixers and go to vodka rocks etc

But if it's a fruity thing from Tiki Ti's on Sunset, it's ultra-class.

Real Actual ILX Cocktail = the Tom Ewing (make a Tom Collins, but replace mixer with extra booze at my insistence)

Millar, rich rich people drink a hell of a lot of straight Scotch (which I find nasty, but whatever). Granted they sprinkle a tiny bit of water on it first but it's essentially straight. You are otherwise correct. We proles do love our straight bourbon, tho

Actually, I have it in mind to quit drinking. With the right cocktail in my hand I do feel very glamorous though. I may have to come up with a new romantic fantasy for myself.

All I'm saying, anyway, is that fruity/flavored drinks are not necessarily the drinks of children or sorority sluts.

as far as i know whiskey sours don't have mint - but i could me wrong.

No, but they suffer from the association with these market segments. Which is a shame, because a good strawberry daiquiri or margarita is a summertime drink for the gods.

The very bottom of the U.S. market is Mad Dog and similar fortified wines (from which is derived the term wino). Just above this are Fritz's shots with risque or silly names.

As an extremely generic principle the sweeter the drink the lower it is in class. However, this is confounded by the existence of "trendy" drinks, such as mojitos or until recently, cosmopolitans. If they filter down to the Spring Break crowd their classiness disappears.

(It hadn't occurred to me before that alcopops are essentially cocktails)

Top Five Wino Wines

If I'm feeling fruity, I drink a Sidecar, which is sweet but not overwhelmingly sweet. I like vodka martinis lately. But usually I stay away from the hard stuff. I have so little patience for sorority girl drinks. My boyfriend loves them, tho.

game rekkanize game :)

Margaritas were invented by an American.

Haha, you know what? Nothing mentioned on this thread is as unclass as Wine in a Box. WORSE YET is wine in a CAN. I have actually seen this as my grandfather was a massive alcoholic and once came back with that. FROM A GARBAGE DUMP. That, my friends, is class.

Well, the thread is specifically about cocktails.

There is nothing low-class about straight single malt.

I am anti anything that dilutes the alcohol too much. Anything full of fruit juice, pah.

Vodka tonic is way inferior to gin and tonic neither of which realy class as cocktails.

However, for low class drinking straight from a willy russel play it has to be Port and lemonade (cresta, or panda pops).

though a wild turkey on the rocks will do in a pinch.

Thread is about cocktails, but I put in a word here for this swill called Old Dan Tucker, whiskey of some kind, sold in N. Ky., nice picture of O.D.T. with his tophat and carriage...goes well with Pepperidge Farm sampler and two people you just met in Florence.

Ick, gin is a terrible tasting thing. I don't understand the appeal, it tastes like soap to me.

I still hold that it seems that sweet alcohols = low class, bitter vile alcohol = high class. Except port and sherry and probably grand marnier, if you drink it after dinner smoking a cigar. I don't understand that and actually think that TOm's theory that sweet = girly holds some truth as to whether or not a drink is "acceptable".

(HAHA DAN/ED SYNERGY)

My favourite cocktail = the armadillo, obv.

What's wrong with wine from a box if it's nice wine? There's a cracking Banrock Station Shiraz Mataro that comes in a 3 litre box. Snobby gets.

Mmmmmm whisky sours, they make me giggle. A bit difficult to create at home, but I cook down a batch of sugar syrup and buy a load of lemons once in a while.

What's in an armadillo, Tim? Is it crunchy on the outside/smooth on the inside?

Let us not forget The Jerk and wine in water cooler tanks.

HAHA DAN/ED SYNERGY

And I still lurk at the heart of it all too. ;-)

The more I discover about Phil, the more I realize he knows full well the answer to this. : )

I drank a lot of coffee before I ever drank alcohol regularly. And so the first time I ever got drunk was on Guinness, because it was the first beer that actually tasted good to me.

Course, now I'll drink anything that's wet.

Also: Irish Car bombs.

And gin ownz.

That Girl is on the money about tequila -- bad tequilas have given it a bad name, but good tequila is why God invented fermentation.

Sorry to be so opinionated... This was 2 years of my life - cocktailing and bartending for trashy hos, guidos, wannabes, celebrity hanger-ons

The only one I can think of is the time a girl sent back a shot of goldschlagger because there weren't enough gold flakes in it. Bitch.

Oh, and some trashy ho ordered a Long Island Iced Tea but specified it had to be Grey Goose, Cointreau, Tanqueray 10, and Bacardi Gold. So I made it with well liquors, charged her $20, and she came back for more!

as much of an abomination as a Long Island Iced Tea is, it does taste pretty good.

And if you're drinking New Orleans novelty beverages, Hand Grenades are nummier than Hurricanes and will waste you even faster.

And I'm still reeling from a Margarita being classified as trashy. Simple does not compute.

you rule.

Very tasty— there’s a bottle in my freezer at all times. Better than Chopin at half the price.

Cognac gets a bad name due to hip hop, but it is my favorite spirit. Kalt makes an excellent XO. The best cognac that I’ve had was after dinner at a friend’s house several years ago. I forget the name, but it had a handwritten label (not printed handwriting— actual pen on paper).

apologize to my cherry!!!

Why does this statement make me think of Bukowski?

I still go for the occasional experiment with a whiskey drink or some absente (see VOCODER thread on ILM) but I definitely don't buy it anymore, I let other people make these dumb decisions and see where it gets them.

Just give it a rest for a while. In a couple months you'll go into a bar or be hanging out and somebody will want to do a shot with you or there'll be a fancy manhattan on the drinks menu somewhere and you'll drink it and be fine.