Leaving on a jetplane

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I am actually somewhat ashamed to be starting this thread, but one of my best friends emigrated to America towards the end of last year to go and live in Manhattan. I would truly love to go and see him, but I keep putting it off and putting it off, because.... well, the prospect of flying absolutely terrifies me. Pathetic, isn't it? I've only flown a couple of times before and hated every minute.

Does anyone else suffer from this affliction, and if so, any tips for conquering it?

― Trevor, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

You must confront your fears by being involved in a plane crash.

― Nick, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Oh, it's not the fear of dying that's the problem - I mean, death is the ultimate inevitable, it's going to happen regardless so I'm not particularly fussed about the precise manner of my departure. A plane crash is no better or worse than a coronary in my opinion.

But I just can't stand the actual physical sensation of flying.

― Trevor, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

What sensation? It feels like sitting down in a rather uncomfortable chair. Do you also fear going to the cinema?

― Emma, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I fear going to the cinema, what a scandalous waste of time and money which could be used for really going out.

― Ronan, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Unless you have a home cinema, going to the cinema = going out surely.

― Tom, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I don't know. I haven't been to the cinema for months, I've always thought it was something I'd only do if I had a girlfriend, so when I tell you the last film I saw was the Sixth Sense, I'm revealing a little too much. As I say if I have enough money to go to the cinema I go out somewhere else. I meant I fear the day when I turn down having a few drinks or going to the pub in favour of the cinema, I just can't understand it. I suppose if I went in the day............

― Ronan, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Y'know, Ronan, this is where you could learn from Grizzled Now Even Older Dog Mr P. Baran who manages to see virtually every film that comes out AND spend every night in the pub AND still have money left over for records. I think he should become your mentor.

― Emma, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I take trains. There is nothing more beuitful and relaxing and sexy in an edwardian sense then a night train to the coast. Even the sound of it , its pure luxury.

― anthony, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

He could be. Maybe some day I could rise as high in the ranks of the Student Union. Maybe some day I'd want to. Doesn't bear thinking about really.

― Ronan, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Trains are indeed marvellous things. Just not the ones run by our motley collection of train operating companies.

― Richard Tunnicliffe, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

This is spot on. The sooner they construct a transatlantic rail link the better.

Perhaps we could start one on this list!

― Trevor, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

"What sensation? It feels like sitting down in a rather uncomfortable chair. Do you also fear going to the cinema?"

I hate the way the plane drunkenly lurches through the sky like a paraplegic albatross. I hate the way my ears pop. I hate the way my mouth goes dry. I hate the way I feel like blowing chunks every time we hit turbulence. I hate the way I am literally paralysed with fear. I hate the way I am partly embedded into the rear of the seat immediately in front of me. I hate the heavily applied make up of the air hostesses, as if they have deliberately set out to conceal a facial disfigurement or a genetic mutation. I hate those tasteless prepackaged meals on plastic trays. I hate the way I feel like I left my stomach on the runway. I hate the way I feel like I'm falling backwards at 1000 miles an hour every time the plane banks. I hate the way my sense of balance is completely obliterated. I hate the way the earth curves when I look down at it. I hate the in-flight movies. I hate the sheer pointlessness and futility of the safety demonstration. I hate relinquishing control to a faceless nameless pilot who knowing my luck is a pissed misanthrope. I hate the way my internal organs feel like they're being compressed into my throat. I hate the claustrophobic sensation of being locked up in a hermetically sealed cocoon.

Does this answer your question?

― Trevor, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Have you seen Falling Down Trevor?

― Ronan, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

He's one of your best friends. He'll appreciate you even more than he does already if he knows you've undergone a few hours of sever discomfort to go and see him, won't he?

― Madchen, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

the trains in Norway are gloriously good

― cabbage, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Take a boat. I know someone who got hired as a shipmate on a nordic carrier . Made his way to america like 5 years ago.

― anthony, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Falling Down is precisely what I *don't* want to happen, Ronan. That and "sever discomfort". I really would lose my head then!

― Trevor, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Trevor -- you is wuss. No, I tease, I have a touch of anxiety here and there on my flights, but usually I'm just bored and want to stretch my legs. Your only other option to visit him is to float over.

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Listen matey, my plane caught fire on Wednesday. I have two weeks to get my head together before I fly home again. If I can do it, so can you.

― Madchen, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Trevor is NO wuss, DAMN IT. Then again Trev, I also fear flying. Now I imagine either my parents dying in a plane crash or me. See, we will be travelling on different planes (This is what the royal family also does, no? I am bourgeois all the way.) Anyhow I will do it despite the fact I am afraid. Why? Because I would otherwise miss out on some unforgettable trips.

― nathalie, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Wait, that looks a bit terse, which isn't how I meant it. The best way to overcome fear is to confront it though, isn't it? Have you got a friend you can travel with who can hold your hand?

― Madchen, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Well if it caught fire on wednesday then that surely lessens the chances of anything happening you again.

― Ronan, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

*nods sagely* Yes Ronan, that's right.

Madchen, whoa! That's so rad! Do tell me more! Was there a demon on the wing?

― Nick, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Aha! I hadn't thought of the lightning never striking twice theory. I'll add that to my list of coping strategies. Thank you.

Nick, refer to Ridiculous Phobias thread.

― Madchen, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Coping strategy it may be but statistically it is rubbish of course.

― Tom, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Can you go to sleep? It sure kills the time and makes it all the more bearable?

― Bill, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

At the moment it's a toss up between Bill's suspended animation and Ned's astral projection. Floating over it is.... better start practising those mantras now.

Then again, I could always get someone to knock me out in true A-Team style.

― Trevor, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Cheers Tom.

*curls up in a ball and sobs uncontrollably*

― Madchen, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

When we left Sapporo, we were told our plane had caught fire in the engine room. So we ended up taking another plane to Osaka. It had this gigantic screen which screened the take-off and landing. It was AWEsome. My dad however clenched the seat and was dripping with sweat. Another time we had enormous turbulence. As a result this Jewish lady freaked out and had a heart-attack. I was sleeping through it all.

― nathalie, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

As was mentioned a while back, my flight over to London was interrupted by the pilot having a heart attack. And yet we landed and continued on the next day, so hey.

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

my main problem with flying = it is extremely boring

(you guys seem to be finding ways round this)

― mark s, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

We can't all have explosive sex and drugs orgies when hopping from continent to continent to pass the time.

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Treatment for flight anxiety: drink and drugs. A strong dose of Valium, and as much whiskey as you can convince the stewardesses to give you, will take you from a waking terror to a nightmare-ridden slumber. Drawbacks: you must make sure not to attempt communication with anyone (except to ask for more whiskey) because your lunging manner may be taken as hostility, and also the way the hangover exacerbates jeg lag.

Virgin Atlantic lost lots of points with me when they showed the unexpurgated "Fight Club" as an in-flight film. Plane crash and everything. God how I wept.

The only o

― sky pilot, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

My mother's deathly afraid of planes. Because of this, she's never gone back to the UK (where she was born). Also because of this, I never went on a plane till I was 22 (a shuttle from Newark to Boston and then back again).

― Tadeusz Suchodolski, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

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