The five worst American TV shows of all time

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Inevitable.

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Never heard of it, Ned. Why is it bad? hahaha

― nathalie, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Seinfeld, Seinfeld, Seinfeld, Seinfeld and Seinfeld.

― DG, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Surely there are too many to mention, including many that would escape most people's memory.

― Sean, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Manimal, Misfits of Science, The Secret Diary of Desmond Phifer, Homeboys From Outer Space, The Mommies.

― Dan Perry, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Ah, Misfits of Science. Between that and Friends Courteney Cox has an unimpeachable track record.

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Jerry Springer. Seen one seen 'em all. And Mr.Springer's attempts to appear "above it all" are simply risible. He's pandering to the lowest common denominator and he knows it. The ultimate in Trash TV, without a doubt.

― Trevor, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

The TV version of Weird Science was a disgrace.

― Jonnie, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Springer is classic. I always wondered why people went on the Jerry Springer show when they KNEW they would get embarrassed. A behind- the-scenes look showed that most guests were merely looking for a forum where they could punch someone out without repercussions. Who says Rome fell?

― Dan Perry, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

maude. the golden girls. third rock from the sun. friends. all sitcoms.

― your null fame, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I'm amazed, Dan. You should be the about.com guy for horrible television.

I'd particularly second Homeboys From Outer Space and The Mommies -- and I'd definitely, definitely add Night Man, which is surely the worst piece of entertainment ever created. I've only seen one episode, but the climax had to do with this guy scoring some heroin and then inviting this girl over for a nice candlelight dinner -- except that he'd put heroin in the food, the evil guy. So here are these two nicely-dressed apparently wealthy folks on a serene little date -- but Mr. Horrible Man has for some reason put heroin in the food -- and then Night Man appears to save the day by saying, "Wait, don't eat that! He put heroin in your food!"

It was even dumber than I've made it sound, if you can believe that.

And don't even talk about the Golden Girls like that around me. I love the Golden Girls. I'm not saying that ironically -- I honestly, honestly enjoy watching this program. It makes me feel comforted and loved and simultaneously amused.

― Nitsuh, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Oh, also, Night Man said something to the guy, something along the lines of, "Don't you realize you shouldn't put heroin in food?" And the guy was like, "You're right, Night Man. Now I understand. Can you ever forgive me?" And of course he'd learned his lesson, so Night Man didn't have to beat him. Although you wonder why Night Man wears this ridiculous costume if all he does is appear at a suspenseful moment and tell people things.

― Nitsuh, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Ah, "Night Man". I adore that show because it's so painfully stupid. Imagine the sermonizing "message" comics released as PSAs by Marvel in the mid-8os done as a television show whose budget appears to be approximately $10.98 per episode.

Does anyone remember the name of the show where this guy turned into a reject from Tron and fought crime? That was wonderfully awful, as well.

― Dan Perry, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I believe that was "Automan", Dan. I watched some re-runs of it on Bravo recently. So bad it's just damn awful.

― Michael Bourke, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Michael Bourke is a SAINT. "Automan" is indeed the show I was trying to remember. Check out this; this one picture pretty much sums up the entire show.

― Dan Perry, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

How dare you provide me that link, Dan, you are SICK LIKE DOG.

In return a Nigh t Man link. Enjoy.

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Oh my God -- Night Man's real-life name is Johnny Domino?

That's pretty cool, actually.

― Nitsuh, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

See? Endless sources of amusement.

I went through a brief "Baywatch" period before realizing that most of the women on the show weren't appealing to me (fake boobs = dud) and the writing wasn't that unintentionally funny.

― Dan Perry, Friday, 7 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

seinfeld,friends, whatserface in the city, veronica's closet, everybody lvoes raybond etc

― Geoff, Saturday, 8 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Is "Automan" about Rave Cultcha? Those E-heads with their shiny shirts and glowsticks etc.

― Mitch Lastnamewithheld, Saturday, 8 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

sex and the city. really bad.

― gareth, Saturday, 8 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Celebrity Death Match. Yet more evidence that MTV should just stick to music. Poor.

― jel, Saturday, 8 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I used to watch Automan all the time. It was pretty much Knight Rider meets Tron.

― Kris, Saturday, 8 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I watched "Automan" constantly, as well. I used to complain all the time that my favorite TV shows would get cancelled after one season ("Automan", "Misfits Of Science", "Manimal"). It wasn't until later that I realized that this was because these shows were pretty awful. I still love them, though.

― Dan Perry, Monday, 10 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Not only that but the BBC went through a period of only buying US action adventure shows which got cancelled. Often after they had been cancelled and stripping their Saturday night schedules with them. Automan rocked though. Manimal, did he only ever go to the smallest zoo in the word as a child because he seemed to only know three animals... (cf Animorphs).

However, poviest had to be Cover Up. Especially after the pretty boy hero got shot in the face and replaced by Ugly boy model.

― Pete, Monday, 10 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

two months pass...

I must say, I enjoyed Manimal. And the Golden Girls. I never heard of Automan.

― Mad Licas, Saturday, 8 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

And no one mentioned Small Wonder or Out of This World.

― bnw, Saturday, 8 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

SMALL WONDER!!!!!!

― Dan Perry, Saturday, 8 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Check It Out was without redemtion. Chain Reaction gets the nod as the worst game show on the tele.

― Mr Noodles, Saturday, 8 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Sorry those were Canadian I guess, must read thread more carefully.

― Mr Noodles, Saturday, 8 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

one year passes...

ALF
Cover Up
Punky Brewster
She's The Sheriff
Santa Barbara

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Saturday, 11 January 2003 15:41 (twenty-two years ago)

I suspect we don't see the worst in the UK, so I couldn't say.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Saturday, 11 January 2003 15:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Cop Rock by far

― Chris Barrus (xibalba), Sunday, 12 January 2003 02:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Pink Lady and Jeff.

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Sunday, 12 January 2003 02:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Empty Nest = evil.

― Poppy (poppy), Sunday, 12 January 2003 02:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Hey, I just found a site that has mp3s of Kidd Video songs!

http://www.kvflipside.org/music/

― Kim (Kim), Sunday, 12 January 2003 03:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Full House

― Nellie (minna), Sunday, 12 January 2003 03:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Whoops!
Girls Club
Shasta McNasty
Ally McBeal
Alf

― mike a (mike a), Sunday, 12 January 2003 03:53 (twenty-two years ago)

cop rock, jesus i thought the show had been erased from collective memory . ..

Girls club, well duh the entire premise was dumb so why watch it.

1. Ally McBeal ::shudder::
2. every ripoff of a British 'reality' show ever made. how could americans be so dumb. oh wait, ally mcbeal. . .
3. alf
4. full house
5. the W fucking B. hello lame white america. . .

― That Girl (thatgirl), Sunday, 12 January 2003 11:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Kenan + Kel, nickelodeon in general.

― naked as sin (naked as sin), Sunday, 12 January 2003 13:22 (twenty-two years ago)

I find this amount of hating on ALF to be disturbing and uncalled for. Did I mention my first record was a 12 inch single of ALF's "Stuck On Earth" (with an "extended dance mix"?)

Also, isn't the guy next to Automan in that picture Cat out of Red Dwarf?

― Daniel_Rf (Daniel_Rf), Sunday, 12 January 2003 13:37 (twenty-two years ago)

All Thicke of the Night episodes with Wally George (1983-1984)
Every single cartoon series Filmation every laid their grimy hands on except for *Fat Albert* and *Fantastic Voyage* and they really didn't age well, either. (1966-1987)
Celebrity Deathmatch (1998-today)
No Soap, Radio (1982)
CBS Sunday Morning (1979-today)

There are probably worse, I just can't think of specifics right now, but these are five shows that fill me with an absolute murderous rage at the people responsible.

BTW, I *like* both Golden Girls AND Touched By An Angel.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Sunday, 12 January 2003 13:59 (twenty-two years ago)

jackass

― naked as sin (naked as sin), Sunday, 12 January 2003 14:03 (twenty-two years ago)

No Soap, Radio

That's an actual title?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 12 January 2003 15:08 (twenty-two years ago)

cybill

― weasel diesel (K1l14n), Sunday, 12 January 2003 19:13 (twenty-two years ago)

magic johnson's talk show, the fast times at ridgemont high tv series, mama's family, nash bridges, any time nascar is on tv

― keith (keithmcl), Sunday, 12 January 2003 19:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Cybill wasn't completely terrible, in that it had two very good actresses in the next two female roles - Alicia Witt as the daughter and wossname who played her best friend. They should have killed off Cybill, and her two husbands, and restarted with just those two.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Sunday, 12 January 2003 20:13 (twenty-two years ago)

Uhm...Emeril, on the Food Network. You guys are talking about merely bad or boring shows. Emeril is simply unwatchable.

― Ernest P. (ernestp), Sunday, 12 January 2003 20:16 (twenty-two years ago)

That's an actual title?

Oh god yes. BTW, I didn't even remember Steve Guttenberg was in it.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Sunday, 12 January 2003 22:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Uhm...Emeril, on the Food Network. You guys are talking about merely bad or boring shows. Emeril is simply unwatchable.

Emeril himself is all right, but he panders too much to his studio audience (and his viewing audience of dimbulb housewives). Why does everyone in his studio audience look mildly retarded? And is it just the cuecards, or are they all really that excited when Emeril adds a few cloves of garlic (YAAAAYYYYY!!! Emeril likes flavorful food!) or a splash of wine (YAAAAAY!!! Emeril's a lush!)?

But Emeril's a good entertainer. He knows how to work a crowd, and he does know his food. So I give him some credit.

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Sunday, 12 January 2003 23:17 (twenty-two years ago)

dimbulb housewives

Uh, if you're going to generalize like that, you might as well throw gay men in there as well. Bam!

― Kim (Kim), Sunday, 12 January 2003 23:29 (twenty-two years ago)

That reads a lot more snarky than I intended. I'm sure you didn't mean it that way.

― Kim (Kim), Sunday, 12 January 2003 23:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Jody Beth Rosen wrote: He knows how to work a crowd, and he does know his food.

True. I actually once had a meal catered by Emeril's of New Orleans, and it was very, very good. And I was actually somewhat fond of the show "How to Boil Water" when Emeril hosted it way back. But now, it has all gone to his head, and it is just difficult to watch him. It's like everyone will be disappointed if he doesn't throw in half a dozen "BAM!"s while tossing cayenne into the air. Or if he doesn't, *shudder*, "kick it up a notch." It's like that episode of the Simpsons where Bart gets pinned as the "I didn't do it" boy. And you are correct about the audience members being potential Diane Arbus photo subjects.

― Ernest P. (ernestp), Sunday, 12 January 2003 23:38 (twenty-two years ago)

I saw a show being advertised the other day called '18 Wheels Of Justice', kinda Littlest Hobo meets Mask. Didn't end up catching it?

Figured it wouldn't be as good as its name. Is it?

― nebbesh (nebbesh), Monday, 13 January 2003 01:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Emeril's Food Network show: not bad
Emeril's short-lived sitcom: offensively awful

Oh, and Jason Alexander's "George Patterson" (sp?) needs to be mentioned in here somewhere.

― mike a (mike a), Monday, 13 January 2003 17:13 (twenty-two years ago)

I can't believe someone said Jackass, that's spoilt my day.

― chris (chris), Monday, 13 January 2003 17:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Not even I can bear Friends anymore...

― Sarah (starry), Monday, 13 January 2003 17:19 (twenty-two years ago)

What was the one about Lincoln's butler again?

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Monday, 13 January 2003 17:57 (twenty-two years ago)

The Secret Diary of Desmond Pfeiffer!

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Monday, 13 January 2003 17:59 (twenty-two years ago)

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