Blunt Horoscopes!

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An good ol' comedic chestnut:

http://www.itsfunoverhere.com/jokes/j085.html

"Virgos make good bus drivers or pimps" should be an album title, dammit.

― Joe (Joe), Friday, 25 April 2003 02:06 (twenty-two years ago)

grrr

― James Blount (James Blount), Friday, 25 April 2003 02:11 (twenty-two years ago)

credit where credit's due.

― RJG (RJG), Friday, 25 April 2003 02:13 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm fuckin' awesome

― Millar (Millar), Friday, 25 April 2003 02:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Talentless and drunk, yup, sounds right to me.

― rosemary (rosemary), Friday, 25 April 2003 02:35 (twenty-two years ago)

I initially read this thread title as being "Blount Horoscopes".

― Chris Barrus (Chris Barrus), Friday, 25 April 2003 02:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Me too. Blount, can you whip up a batch?

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Friday, 25 April 2003 02:38 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm on the cusp of thriving on incest and putting things off. I'm a procrastinating motherfucker.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 April 2003 02:38 (twenty-two years ago)

You are sympathetic and understanding to other people's problems. They think you are a sucker. You are always putting things off. That is why you will always be on welfare and won't be worth a shit.

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 03:41 (twenty-two years ago)

Luna is me minus incest.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 April 2003 03:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Well you would be too if you'd ever met anyone I'm related to.

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 03:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Well, it's not like I'm the scion of MM and JFK or anything. ... wait, are you advocating the "but he/she's so HOT!" defense for incest?

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 April 2003 03:48 (twenty-two years ago)

You are practical and persistent. You have a dogged determination and work like hell. Most people think you are stubborn and bull-headed. You are nothing but a goddamn Communist.

It's so true. I have the Russian pins all over my jackets to prove it.

― Ally (mlescaut), Friday, 25 April 2003 03:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Uh, it sounds like it doesn't it? Hmm - not my original intent, but I suppose ok for second cousins.

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 03:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Except "second cousin incest" sounds like "we liked it so much the first time, we had to have another round."

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 April 2003 03:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh it's so spot on!

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Friday, 25 April 2003 03:58 (twenty-two years ago)

"we liked it so much the first time, we had to have another round."

("... a little bit louder and a little bit worse!")

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Tep = OTM

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Hrmph. GMP.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Just watch out for that downstroke.

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:08 (twenty-two years ago)

... you know, I'm eating berry burst Cheerios, and seeing the name in a totally different way now.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:10 (twenty-two years ago)

You stay away from my cheerios, mister

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:11 (twenty-two years ago)

That doesn't sound very "sympathetic and understanding" to me, dammit.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh sure, so you can call me a sucker? I'm not falling for that more than eight times! No way!

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Damn. This must be what cats feel like on their ninth life.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:16 (twenty-two years ago)

If I were a cat, I think I'd sit the ninth life out. Be reckless for the first 8, but the last one? No way, you're even carrying my ass to the litterbox, I'm not taking any chances.

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:19 (twenty-two years ago)

I think right around life 7 or 8 you'd be all paranoid. "Hey, wait, that time when like I bit that dog's tail, and the owner pulled it away -- did that count? How many do I REALLY have left?" And then you'd be all bathing in the blood of kittens and whatnot to try to reclaim your once seemingly endless youth.

Plus, crapping in a box.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:23 (twenty-two years ago)

It's a good thing I'm not a cat

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:27 (twenty-two years ago)

You got something against crapping in a box? Snob.

― buttch (Oops), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:28 (twenty-two years ago)

It's a good thing I'm not a cat

Well yeah, but that means you've only got one life to be paranoid about.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:29 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm impressed that you both resisted the obvious joke there

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Give us some credit. (Why you should do so, I haven't the foggiest idea)

― buttch (Oops), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Right - credit extended - my bad

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:34 (twenty-two years ago)

I think if I'd made it, I would've had to incorporate an acronym, and I'm all acronymed out.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:35 (twenty-two years ago)

It was a busy day for them

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Post Useful Sexy Sayings Youngster

― buttch (Oops), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:37 (twenty-two years ago)

I had that coming

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Now you're just setting up the obvious jokes.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Oooh, can I be 'that' (sorry)

― buttch (Oops), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Sometimes I fail to catch the most obvious ones...

(sure, you can if you want)

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:42 (twenty-two years ago)

off to bed (with visions of lunaplums dancing in my head). g'night.

― buttch (Oops), Friday, 25 April 2003 04:47 (twenty-two years ago)

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