Say something not nice about Texas. . .

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SO I CAN KICK YER ASS!!

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:34 (twenty-two years ago)

So? What then? Step up so I can drop you, punk.

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:34 (twenty-two years ago)

the job market in austin sucks.

― fortunate hazel (f. hazel), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:43 (twenty-two years ago)

alright. no argument there. (but then it's suckin' all over)

got something stronger??

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:45 (twenty-two years ago)

too dusty

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:45 (twenty-two years ago)

it's hot

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:45 (twenty-two years ago)

too much religious freaks

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:45 (twenty-two years ago)

too big---give some of that shit up already

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:46 (twenty-two years ago)

it smells kinda funny

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:46 (twenty-two years ago)

texans are too prideful

― jonas lefrel (jonas lefrel), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:46 (twenty-two years ago)

IS THAT ALL YOU GOT?!?!?

pansywaists. . .

re: too big - HA! NOT. BIG. ENOUGH.

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Dalhart depressed the shit outta me

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Dubya

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:47 (twenty-two years ago)

not enough mountains

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:47 (twenty-two years ago)

The Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders are ugly

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Sam Houston can eat my humongoloid fuc

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Oops is getting close. Ya'll can have Dubya. We didn't want him to begin with.

The Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders are ugly
yeah, and the Dallas Cowboys are crackhead perverts. Your point?

But what ya got against Sam Houston?

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh, I forget. Something or other...

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:53 (twenty-two years ago)

I do remember the Alamo tho.

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Line dancing

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:53 (twenty-two years ago)

did i mention it's hot and dusty and smelly? and the poor poor tasty cows?

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:54 (twenty-two years ago)

it's not all dusty sweetie. Most of it's sticky. I dunno about smelly. Only in parts.

Cows are yum.

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:57 (twenty-two years ago)

oh you've done it now! That post is getting pasted.

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:58 (twenty-two years ago)

too many frickin' oil derricks

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:01 (twenty-two years ago)

*sigh*

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:02 (twenty-two years ago)

the alamo is too small and too many people call it "the shrine of texas liberty" with an alarming lack of irony.

― fortunate hazel (f. hazel), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:03 (twenty-two years ago)

The people look at me funny.

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:03 (twenty-two years ago)

*looks sideways at oops*

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:04 (twenty-two years ago)

the name: Texas? WTF? (i'm spent)

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:07 (twenty-two years ago)

It keeps DDG from us.

― Mary (Mary), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Mary is rainbows!

(Oops, I'd heard as much.)

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:09 (twenty-two years ago)

(who told?!?)

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:11 (twenty-two years ago)

The big country
With open skies
And you
For company

― rosemary (rosemary), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:28 (twenty-two years ago)

oh wait, you asked for not nice

― rosemary (rosemary), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:29 (twenty-two years ago)

It would be terrible if you were agoraphobic and with a jerk, though!

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:31 (twenty-two years ago)

sean in save shockah!

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Then again, maybe giving the world Jerry Hall isn't something to be proud of.

― rosemary (rosemary), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Texas don't have Gareth anymore.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Texas don't have Gareth anymore.

*sniff*

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:41 (twenty-two years ago)

“Well, Mister President, you can't say that Texas doesn't love you!”

― rosemary (rosemary), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:45 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.jfkmurdersolved.com/jfkimages/j4.jpg

― rosemary (rosemary), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:46 (twenty-two years ago)

George W. Bush.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:48 (twenty-two years ago)

i'm ashamed of Texas because the dixie chix are from there.

― gygax! (gygax!), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:52 (twenty-two years ago)

u r all. . ..YANKEES!!

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Aggies!

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Tracer Hand OTM!!

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:58 (twenty-two years ago)

I forgot all the good jokes though.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Everything you need to know about most of Texas, you can learn by watching King of the Hill. No foolin'.

I could go on about Houston for days, though. Here's a Houston anecdote: Near my Mom's house, there was a leaky sprinkler near the road. Not too big a deal, just a little water in the road at the same spot all the time. But it was close to a seam in the pavement, and since the pavement was wet all the time, it quickly weakened and made a hole. And the hole got bigger. So they filled the hole with fresh asphault. The asphault washed out. So they filled the hole with more asphault. Then it washed out. Never once did anyone think to fix the leaky sprinkler. Meanwhile, about a half mile away, on one side of a major boulevard, this huge sinkhole developed, and filled with water everytime it rained, making half the road unpassable. They filled the hole with -- get this -- sand. I shit you not.

These are not major issues, of course, but if little shit like this gets handled so badly, you have to wonder how tenuous the entire infrastructure of the city is. What happens when power lines are down? Duct tape?

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:03 (twenty-two years ago)

They just set the oil refineries alight Kenan.

'Scuse me, King of the Hill's on.

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:05 (twenty-two years ago)

You oughta see the roads in College Station

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Yep, Tracer winZ0r

― Aaron A., Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:12 (twenty-two years ago)

I once got directions at a Taco Bell in College Station from Boomhauer.

(btw, I'm a longhorn. ahem.)

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Shiner Bock is hella boring for something so celebrated. Much like the rest of Texas itself. San Antonio is a completely irredeemable shithole, DFW has one of the worst airports in the country next to Cincinnati, Houston has the worst seafood on the Gulf, and Austin would be a nice college town if every other major college town in America hadn't already done it first. The size of the Longhorns' football posse doesn't hold a fucking candle to Michigan or Tennessee, Fuck some Aggies, and El Paso is just a gentrified mall-wart on Juarez. Everything in between is owned by some branch of the military and completely pitted and scarred. Texas is like all the dregs of the Four Corners and all the dregs of the Civil War South rolled into one giant nasty tumor on the ass end of America. Thank God for petroleum deposits and a lack of state income tax or it would still only be populated by demented suckers who couldn't make it anywhere else.

Lone Star is a Midwestern lager relabeled. Every town in Texas is trying to be some town in Georgia, but with stupider hats and boots.

― Millar (Millar), Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:28 (twenty-two years ago)

Norah Jones got her Jazz degree at a Texas college.

― Millar (Millar), Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:30 (twenty-two years ago)

oooh, get him That Girl!

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Millar may expect a slow, tortuous, painful death when I get off work on Friday.

Faux-UT, Air Force muthafucka. . .

(he also wins.)

(btw, Norah Jones graduated from a Dallas public high school.)

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:31 (twenty-two years ago)

I was born in Houston.

― hstencil, Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:33 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm sorry.

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:33 (twenty-two years ago)

So was Houston *rimshot*

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:34 (twenty-two years ago)

I love Texas for almost every Isn't that Millar points out. We're a hole nuther country! Good stuff though, still.

― Aaron A., Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Good things about Texas, lest we forget:

Molly Ivins
The Hill Country
the Capitol building
the Riverwalk in San Antonio
Tito's handmade vodka
our wacky Democrats
the museums in Fort Worth
Rothko Chapel in Houston
good Mexican food
Texas Monthly magazine
beautiful women everywhere

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Thursday, 29 May 2003 04:13 (twenty-two years ago)

Big Bend
Blind Willie Johnson

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 04:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Willie Nelson
Waylon Jennings

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Thursday, 29 May 2003 04:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Aaron A. and Kenan know what's up. Thank you, you two.

As for me, the only negative thing I can say about Texas is that we have some really crap weather patterns. Our summers are just way too brutal for any human to have to get used to.

Oh wait -- we're the state that gave Ross Perot to the world. Sorry guys. We really didn't know he was going to be like that.

― Dee the Lurker (Dee the Lurker), Thursday, 29 May 2003 04:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Shiner Bock is hella boring for something so celebrated.

I've been saying this for years, and oddly enough, it really pisses people off. I point out that it's not a real bock, and that there's caramel coloring added to it, and that its taste is crushingly ordinary, and the conversation always either ends or turns ugly. Why people have such weirdly misplaced pride in a mass-produced beer is beyond me.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Thursday, 29 May 2003 04:30 (twenty-two years ago)

For the record, though, I'm drinking a Lone Star right now. Love that stuff.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Thursday, 29 May 2003 04:35 (twenty-two years ago)

duly noted, Mr. Hebert.

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 29 May 2003 04:40 (twenty-two years ago)

texas is the reason that the president's dead, according to the misfits.

― Fritz Wollner (Fritz), Thursday, 29 May 2003 12:55 (twenty-two years ago)

I can't believe someone bagged on DFW airport. That airport kills every airport I've ever been in, and would be the undisputed champ if it had a bullet train or whatever like O'Hare. DFW's only real problem is that it's incredibly big - in fact, it's the largest airport in the world.

― dleone (dleone), Thursday, 29 May 2003 13:24 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.googlism.com/index.htm?ism=texas&type=3

― teeny (teeny), Thursday, 29 May 2003 13:33 (twenty-two years ago)

haha texas is hot for teachers.

― teeny (teeny), Thursday, 29 May 2003 13:34 (twenty-two years ago)

texas is broken

― Ed (dali), Thursday, 29 May 2003 13:45 (twenty-two years ago)

There's no basement in the Alamo!

― Nicole (Nicole), Thursday, 29 May 2003 13:46 (twenty-two years ago)

IT'S FRIGGIN TEXAS!!! psh peasy

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 29 May 2003 13:47 (twenty-two years ago)

You are all hataz.

I'm gonna bust outta Assassination City and open a Texas-sized can o' whoop ass on all y'all.

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 14:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Do all texans talk like wrestlers, or is that only the clever ones.

― Ed (dali), Thursday, 29 May 2003 14:19 (twenty-two years ago)

*bodyslams ed*

― That Girl (thatgirl), Thursday, 29 May 2003 14:20 (twenty-two years ago)

From the Onion:

http://graphics.theonion.com/pics_3920/statshot_3920.jpg

hackey sacks. heh.

― That Girl (thatgirl), Monday, 2 June 2003 14:56 (twenty-two years ago)

They forgot "One week of bragging rights during the next SxSW." ("Yeah man, I live here.")

― nickn (nickn), Monday, 2 June 2003 19:12 (twenty-two years ago)

No Nick it would be "One week of bitching rights during the next SxSW." ("Can you all leave already so we can have our city back?")

― That Girl (thatgirl), Monday, 2 June 2003 19:15 (twenty-two years ago)

I think they use my phrase to the out-of-towners and yours to the other locals.

― nickn (nickn), Monday, 2 June 2003 19:35 (twenty-two years ago)

I *big heart* Austin. Austin is really, really cool.

But how in the world did the Onion know about Emo's, hmm??

*figures someone there must be a native Austinite*

― Dee the Lurker (Dee the Lurker), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 03:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Well, not to burst your bubble, but I've heard of Emo's long before I visited Austin. I mean, it's featured heavily in "Slacker".

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 03:44 (twenty-two years ago)

*feels quite dumb now*

I do get a "by" by stating I've never seen the movie "Slacker" before, don't I, though?

*said in a pleading tone*

*runs out of thread before embarassing self even further*

― Dee the Lurker (Dee the Lurker), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 04:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh heavens, Dee, don't fret about that. Just think about something cool, like that Cure DVD. :-)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 04:43 (twenty-two years ago)

The only state with its own bathroom graffiti : Here I sit, buns a-flexin, giving birth to another Texan

― Kerry (dymaxia), Saturday, 7 June 2003 11:51 (twenty-two years ago)

eleven months pass...

Texas has refused tax-exempt status to the Unitarian church because "does not have one system of belief."

Unitarian Universalists have for decades presided over births, marriages and memorials. The church operates in every state, with more than 5,000 members in Texas alone.

But according to the office of Texas Comptroller Carole Keeton Strayhorn, a Denison Unitarian church isn’t really a religious organization—at least for tax purposes. Its reasoning: the organization “does not have one system of belief.”

Never before—not in this state or any other—has a government agency denied Unitarians tax-exempt status because of the group’s religious philosophy, church officials say. Strayhorn’s ruling clearly infringes upon religious liberties, said Dan Althoff, board president for the Denison congregation that was rejected for tax exemption by the comptroller’s office.

“I was surprised—surprised and shocked—because the Unitarian church in the United States has a very long history,” said Althoff, who notes that father-and-son presidents John Adams and John Quincy Adams were both Unitarians. […]

Questions about the issue were referred to Jesse Ancira, the comptroller’s top lawyer, who said Strayhorn has applied a consistent standard — and then stuck to it. For any organization to qualify as a religion, members must have “simply a belief in God, or gods, or a higher power,” he said.

“We have got to apply a test, and use some objective standards,” Ancira said. “We’re not using the test to deny the exemptions for a particular group because we like them or don’t like them.” […]

Those who oppose the comptroller’s “God, gods or supreme being” test say that it can discriminate against legitimate faiths. For example, applying that standard could disqualify Buddhism because it does not mandate belief in a supreme being, critics say.

Opponents note that the federal government applies less stringent rules for federal tax exemptions, yet manages to discourage fraud and abuse. They also question whether the comptroller’s office has formulated excuses to discriminate against nontraditional groups, such as those that include witches and pagans. […]

Strayhorn vows to continue the legal fight to the U.S. Supreme Court, if necessary. “Otherwise, any wannabe cult who dresses up and parades down Sixth Street on Halloween will be applying for an exemption,” she said in a April 23 news release.

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Thursday, 20 May 2004 00:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Translation: the scam religion of L. Ron Hubbard is valid, but not the beliefs of Ethan Allen and Daniel Webster.

Way to go Texas!

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Thursday, 20 May 2004 00:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Rumor is that Strayhorn is going to challenge Perry for guv'nah in 2006. She's been on the attack for a few months over school funding, now this. Moving even further right than Perry and appealing to fundie wackjobs looks like her strategy.

Scarier still, it might work. Perry's approval numbers are in the toilet.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Thursday, 20 May 2004 02:03 (twenty-one years ago)

You can't base the whole of Texas by this one individual, Carole Keeton Strayhorn. She has been very hard to take seriously by rational minds in TX ever since she got elected as "Carole Keeton Rylander" and then soon after the elections were over seemed to suddenly drop the Rylander and add the Strayhorn. And that's the least strange of her actions -- just way too many oddities there to list.

― Those Beautiful Lines (Dee the Lurker), Thursday, 20 May 2004 02:13 (twenty-one years ago)

She got married after elections Dee, that's why her name changed to Strayhorn from Rylander. why is that strange?

― Ask For Samantha (thatgirl), Thursday, 20 May 2004 11:53 (twenty-one years ago)

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