Beards : Classic or Dud?

In a thousand years time, the Simon Schama of that day will be completely mystified by obscure late second millennium references to this strange habit men had back then, of running sharp bits of metal over vital arteries in the neck, with only a fogged-up mirror to guide their movements, at a time when they were about 20% alert having only just woken up.

He will probably condescendingly describe it as an ancient pagan ritual to appease the gods of the day, and he wouldn't be that far wide of the mark.

imagining another one is rather difficult, i must say

http://www.zetosa.com.pl/piotrus/greenpages/zztop/fandango-l.jpg

It's funny to see ZZ Top mentioned - did you that while two of them have big beards, the drummer doesn't, and his name is -

READER'S VOICE: Oh fuck off.

Classic. Clearly.

now this i beg to differ on. apart from sting's recent attempt at this look, abe lincoln and several thousand amish people can't be wrong. it's one of those thing's that's just so wrong it's right - so long as you're not sting...

The neck-only beard is going too far. If there are aesthetically pleasing ones in existence, somebody should post an example.

in which case i like it!

I had a full beard for many years, due largely to laziness about shaving, but I think they're pretty dud.

There's a guy I work with that has that look. He's also k-skinny and wears, like, workshirts -- so I call him the Amish Punk.

As for me, I've had a (non-Amish) beard for the last five months. People seem to like it, so I'm keeping it, for now at least.

I like beards, and could grow one, but the skin underneath gets unhealthy pretty quick for me, I'm afraid.

i let a beard grow over the christmas break and have kept since, it's funny about 50% of work ppl don't even mention the change, and the other 50% are all 'what's with the beard, weirdo??'

I have light brown head hair, but teh beard is multi-coloured: brown, blond, ginger and grey, which keeps things interesting

Some people at work haven't commented that it's gone at all, others (including a new woman who only started about three weeks ago) have been quite taken aback - the new woman said she hadn't recognised me!

how do you *trim* ? whenever I try with clippers or scissors it just looks uneven, so I end up taking the whole beard off - and then my kids tell me I "look about twelve"

but to answer the thread question, my chin needs as much help as it can get so Classic.

how do you *trim* ?

Wahl Groomsman ftw

Gotta say I'm keeping mine. I'm a small man and without a beard I look 14 years old. I never really grew one until this year. I was real depressed and didn't leave my house or shave for a week or two and just felt like shit. Then one day i went out and everyone was telling me how good i look.

i've become too used to it. last time i shaved it off i was horrified by the results

Reality TV personality Jeremy McConnell has been jailed for 18 weeks for missing community service to get a hair and beard transplant.

same

I've vacillated between beard and no beard on and off for about 6 years now; every so often I get bored and shave it off, then let it grow back. I hate shaving, and don't like being clean shaven. And people tell me a beard suits me.

This year I last shaved on New Year's Day, so unless I have a hissy fit in the next five or so weeks, I'll have kept a beard for a whole year, which feels like... something.

Grow one every now and again, the balder I get the more it looks about right I think

pretty much all around dud these days

I don’t trust anyone without a beard.

in the process of growing one now but i am bald so thats ok

Haven't been clean shaven in several years. I grew one of them long beards during the great beard craze of 2014. I did do a very close stubble shave a while back because of a fancy dress party and I didn't like it, although I am curious as to what a clean shave would feel like again. The first thing I noticed when I grew a beard wasn't itching, so much as how peculiar it was to press my lips or kiss my partner's skin and for it to feel hairy

I've had a beard since 2012 and had a notion to go back to clean-shaven, so I did, and it was horrifying. I felt naked, and I looked... idk, gaunt, weird... anyway,never again. Hirsute to the grave.

otm I will only shave when I feel completely OK with myself, so, never

had a beard since 2008 or so. i've shaven it off before and i've also had an absolutely giant beard for a while.

i like the feeling of being clean shaven but i am balding and tend to feel a beard gives some definition.

bald + beard is good

Why? Reality TV personality Jeremy McConnell could have just concentrated on the beard transplant then.

mitbeards xp

My beard, when it’s present, ages me about 5 years...so I try to keep clean

why do you never see bearded octo/nonagenerians

counterpoint: my granny

I’ve never grown a massive beard. I just keep a good, full covering.

I am a neckshaver though, to my shame. My neck coverage is patchy, so I even it up every Monday morning.

Xxp because they're dead

Beard wearer for 4+ years and proud neck shaver, who wants or wants to see a hairy neck?

33 years old. can't grow a beard. probably wouldn't if i could. would like the option to try a mustache though

I dislike beards in general, I'm pretty lazy so I often go a week without shaving but that's my limit. I think I look better clean-shaven tbh.

Agree ,clean shaven ftw

1 day stubble tbh

go a week or so without shaving, then it becomes itchy and irritable and has to go. In the past six months an interesting development has occured - grey and white patches in the chin. It feels ridiculous at 29.

I used to tweezer all the grey out. There’s too much now. Not massively visible from a distance, but even so. Disheartening. I spotted a grey chest hair the other day.

Beards with grey in them are good

otm

What's grey now in mine was ashy ginger in summer in my twenties have always appreciated the tonal shifts tbh

Beards are good

(Some beards are not good)

ilx is having a bald-bashing week for some reason so I will also register my appreciation for the handsome baldies of ilx, with or without beards

Also, a phrase people use that never quite comes off the way it's intended to for me is "beard-stroking", stroking beards is good, beards are to be stroked

Stroke it Noel

Also, a phrase people use that never quite comes off the way it's intended to for me is "beard-stroking",

aka chin-stroking for hipsters, amirite 'sup

My goatee was distracting from my noble mane so I shaved it off. Also every other white male gentrifier in my neighborhood has one so I’m bucking the trend.

Still only breaking out the razor once a week though.

Bearded since 2005, thanks to sunburn at a Tracer Hand softballl party. Dreads since 1998. I don’t really do change.

35 years bearded. Both times I've shaved it have been painful chilly mistakes.

For me, wearing a relatively short beard has been classic because for me shaving every day is beyond dud.

Short beard is a dud look for me and overdone generally, but fuck do i hate shaving so there i am.

beard since about 2003 - was a redhead, now i'm a balding ginger bastard

i'm bald with a large patchy-grey beard and i look better than i ever have tbh

So are there any men on ILX who don't have beards?

Uh, maybe? My face is a field of conflict between incompatible impulses. I don't like shaving, and I don't like having a beard.

The normal state is DonJohnsonian permascruff, which is mostly fine. I probably trim and/or shave every week or 10 days. But there is nuance behind this, and a story. Unfortunately it is a very boring story. Sorry.

My facial hair naturally grows into a goatee shape with ease, while the surrounding territory remains scraggly and sparse at best.

For cultural reasons I cannot do a goatee. Some dudes can manage it, but I just look like the worst barista you had in 1992, or maybe the slightly dim hillbilly in a movie. (The one that Pa sends out to the farm in case the Sheriff comes snoopin' around.)

With careful management, I can get a beard-like shape in a month or so. But every time I do so, it starts itching me almost immediately and irritating my wife's skin. So I get abruptly sick of it and go back to Miami Vice territory.

Pro tip: when you're shaving off a beard, it can be amusing to stop at different stages and give them names. Some of my faves:

- 1970s Motorcyle Cop

- Serial Molester

- World War I Fighter Pilot

- Fascist Dictator

- Substitute Junior-High Gym Teacher

- Civil War Cavalryman

- Free-Jazz Saxophonist

We’re basically in the same boat, but my goatee just looks like I’m going for knausgaard or jesus