don't Search, just Destroy: office birthday cards

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o so i am sick of these cards benig handed round in internal mail style envelopes, which i have to sign with some platitude like 'have a great day' or something, wishing someone i barely know a good birthday. i mean i dont wish anyone a bad birthday, its just such a formality. im dreading my birthday, thinking about a card going round for me, and people trying to think of something that isnt totally banal to write. its like a foprmalised thing - we pay a quid amonth or something, then these shitty cards get bought. so do you have to go through this absurd process? is it not soul destroying?

― ambrose (ambrose), Thursday, 12 June 2003 12:50 (twenty-two years ago)

hey! look everyone, Ambrose hates fun!

― chris (chris), Thursday, 12 June 2003 12:54 (twenty-two years ago)

I have quit trying to say anything meaningful in them. I just write Happy Birthday and then sign my name. Who cares.

― NA. (Nick A.), Thursday, 12 June 2003 12:54 (twenty-two years ago)

my real answer btw = burn them all, obv.

― chris (chris), Thursday, 12 June 2003 12:56 (twenty-two years ago)

This happens about 20 times a year in my office. I gave up trying to be witty or meaningful a long time ago. We used to gather round people's desks for the 'surprise' gift giving until one day we realised that we all hate fun - especially if it involves being the centre of attention. We still expect the birthday person to bring cakes though.

― robster (robster), Thursday, 12 June 2003 13:01 (twenty-two years ago)

As I was writing that, a folder just landed on my desk with a card inside.

― robster (robster), Thursday, 12 June 2003 13:05 (twenty-two years ago)

I simply don't tell anyone my birthday and also take it off as holiday. I've still never worked on my birthday, it's a matter of principle to me.

― chris (chris), Thursday, 12 June 2003 13:14 (twenty-two years ago)

what did you say when they asked when it was? the 32nd of december?
or that you dont have a birthday (good way to set you up as 'the weird guy')?
actually i should have said that i cant remeber when it is, it was so long ago.

― ambrose (ambrose), Thursday, 12 June 2003 13:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, I always take my own birthday off.
In my office, the company pays for a birthday cake. Though there are only like 8 full-time employees, so I guess they can afford it. Then on your anniversary of working there, you get another cake and probably some kind of plant. My birthday is 2 weeks before my work anniversary, so May is like my month around here.

― NA. (Nick A.), Thursday, 12 June 2003 13:27 (twenty-two years ago)

I've got my birthday off this year - a week today - woo! Plus another week for good measure.

However, I LIKE our office birthday cards. Maybe because we only circulate them between about 15 of us and we all get on fairly well. It's usually my job to get them all signed (in unspoken stationery troll job description) so I'm glad there's not more people in the dept.

I will be sad if I don't get a card next week.

― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 12 June 2003 13:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Thankfully we don't do these. We have to buycakes for others. No big deal is made of it.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Thursday, 12 June 2003 16:38 (twenty-two years ago)

We don't do these but we do have leaving cards. Which seem to arrive everyday, morale being what it is. And then we have leaving drinks in the tea room. There's a joint one today actually. Which was tricky cos I couldn't write the same stock phrase in both cards I had to develop a new one. ("good luck in Christchurch")

― isadora (isadora), Thursday, 12 June 2003 19:39 (twenty-two years ago)

I like office cards becasue I can write little messages and sign off with a kiss for the people I like and for those I don't: "Best regards, Lara".

― Lara (Lara), Thursday, 12 June 2003 21:35 (twenty-two years ago)

nine months pass...

I just got handed one of these - it's not a birthday card but a get well card for someone I barely know and who hasn't worked in this office for over a year. The card is accompanied by a checklist of names of everyone in the department with instructions to "sign, check your name off, and hand it to someone unchecked".

Yeah yeah, I'm Nyarlathotep incarnate for hating on people's get well wishes, but again don't search - just destroy.

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Wednesday, 7 April 2004 21:44 (twenty-one years ago)

If a card comes round for someone I dont know, I refuse to sign it. I mean whats the point? Theyre only going to look at it and think "who the hells that?". Plus cards only seem to get done for people leaving or going on maternity leave, and babies make me cranky.

We seem to be doing a lot of leaving cards lately; rats, ship, etc etc.

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 7 April 2004 22:52 (twenty-one years ago)

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