The Assiest Thread in the History of Ass

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OK, everyone, drop whatever the hell you're doing, pull your pants up from around your ankles, and do what I say.

It is time to take titles of movies, books, or whatever and replace one word with the word "ass." The Matrix: Reloaded would thus become The Ass: Reloaded. Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee could be Buried My Ass at Wounded Knee, or Bury My Heart at Wounded Ass, or -- if you're really inspired -- Bury My Ass at Wounded Ass. Think about it; don't everyone just use titles from the current TV or movie line-up. Anyone caught repeating another person's previously posted title will be hunted down and brutally sodomized by Ned.

Got it? GO!

― jewelly (jewelly), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:16 (twenty-one years ago)

The Ass Escape.

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Anyone caught repeating another person's previously posted title will be hunted down and brutally sodomized by Ned.

Um, yeah.

All About Ass.

The Ass Commandments

Gone With the Ass.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:20 (twenty-one years ago)

The Breakfast Ass
Ass Times at Ridgemont High
The Third Ass
The Saved Hitler's Ass
Full Metal Ass

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:21 (twenty-one years ago)

The Black Ass.

The Ass Monty.

Hamburger Ass.

Ass and Confused.

Ender's Ass.

Asses.

― Millar (Millar), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:22 (twenty-one years ago)

THEY Saved Hitler's Ass

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:22 (twenty-one years ago)

I am a Fugitive from a Ass Gang

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Ass's Rainbow

Waiting for Ass

The Children's Ass

The Ass and Daniel Webster

The Ass of Our Discontent

The Catcher in the Ass

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Ass Wars

Braveass

Return of the Ass Panther

― Chris Radford (Chris Radford), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:24 (twenty-one years ago)

An Ass Grows in Brooklyn

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:24 (twenty-one years ago)

T3: The Rise of The Asses.
Ass Another Day
Assraker
Asspussy
Dr Ass
A View To An Ass
For Your Ass Only
From Ass With Love

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Midnight Assboy

Mission: Ass

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Boyz in the Ass
Ass II Society
Last of the Assmen
The Unbearable Ass of Being

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:26 (twenty-one years ago)

The Ass and the Furious

The Pirates of the Ass

Ass Velvet

Ass Club

Akira Kurosawa's Ass

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:27 (twenty-one years ago)

The Assman Cometh

Ass Food Lodging

What Price Ass?

Kiss Ass, Kate

The People Under the Ass

Dude, Where's My Ass?

― jewelly (jewelly), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Kentucky Fried Ass

Lawrence of Ass

Ass Runner

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:28 (twenty-one years ago)

The Neverending Ass
The 7 Year Ass
Who's Afraid of Virginia('s) Ass?

(lmao at Dude, Where's...)

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Picnic at Hanging Ass

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:28 (twenty-one years ago)

The Remains of the Ass
RoboAss

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:29 (twenty-one years ago)

How To Get Ahead In Ass
My Bloody Ass (also now Ned's favorite band)
The Ass Is Not Enough

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Indiana Jones and The Ass of Doom

Raiders of the Lost Ass

Ass Royale

Ass Fiction

Honey, I shrunk the Ass

A Bug's Ass

― Millar (Millar), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Smilla's Ass of Snow

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:30 (twenty-one years ago)

The Ass-men

The Empire Strikes Ass

Ass Fidelity

Pee-Wee's Big Ass

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:30 (twenty-one years ago)

The Sweet Smell of Ass

How to Succeed in Ass Without Really Trying

― jewelly (jewelly), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Ten Things I Hate About Ass

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Ass
Star Trek III: The Search for Ass
Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Ass

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:32 (twenty-one years ago)

This is Ass Tap

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Ass Bloody Ass
In the Ass of My Father

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Ass Dreams May Come

Come Back to the Five and Dime, Ass, Ass

― jewelly (jewelly), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:33 (twenty-one years ago)

(OMG, I'm dying here)

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Harry Potter and The Philosopher's Ass
Harry Potter and The Chamber of Ass

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Spiderass
There's Something About Ass
Some Like Ass Hot
The Postman Only Rings Ass
Mad Ass Beyond Thunderdome
Breakin' Ass: Electric Boogaloo
Sophie's Ass
Ass of Endearment
Pretty Ass

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:33 (twenty-one years ago)

meet ass in st louis
the wizard of ass
charlie and the ass factory
the ass of music
the rocky horror ass show

― di smith (lucylurex), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:34 (twenty-one years ago)

This Boy's Ass
The Ass-shank Redemption

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:34 (twenty-one years ago)

It's A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Ass

Dr. Strangelove; or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Ass

― jewelly (jewelly), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Singing in the Ass
Desperately Seeking Ass

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Muppets Take Ass
Yentass
Ass Pirates
Peter Ass
Snow Ass
Ass Wars
Ass Trek II, The Wrath of Ass
Brahamm Stoker's Ass
Twilight Ass

― Scaredy cat (Natola), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Mad Max Beyond Assdome

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Shit, some of mine were used while I was composing my list. Hunt me down and kill me.

― Scaredy cat (Natola), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Go Ass Alice

I Dismember Ass

― jewelly (jewelly), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:37 (twenty-one years ago)

The Ass of Attraction
Schindler's Ass
Truth or Ass

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Ass T. The Extraterrestrial

Secret Ass of Walter Mitty

Rain Ass

Ass by Northwest

― Millar (Millar), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Places in the Ass
Asses in the Heart
Romancing the Ass

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:37 (twenty-one years ago)

The Ass Pit
Texass Chainsaw Assacre

― Scaredy cat (Natola), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Planes, Trains, and Asses
Beyond the Valley of the Ass
Planet of the Ass
Escape from the Planet of the Ass

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:39 (twenty-one years ago)

The Fast and the Ass
Revenge of the Ass
Nightmare on Ass Street
Ass Resurrection
Assbound
Finding Ass
Ass Hawk Down

― Chris Radford (Chris Radford), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Peggy Sue Got Ass (for days!)

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:39 (twenty-one years ago)

On the Ass Again
Of Mice and Ass
Call of the Ass

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Tripping the Ass Fantastic
Raging Ass
Straw Ass
Assfather, Assfather II, Assfather III
Eraserass

― Scaredy cat (Natola), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:40 (twenty-one years ago)

The Truth About Ass and Dogs

What's Up, Ass?

Whatever Happened to Baby Ass?

― jewelly (jewelly), Monday, 23 June 2003 01:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Skipping 439 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

there is safety in ass
you can't take ass with you when you die
you can't have your ass and eat it too
the ass justifies the means
jack of all trades, master of ass
let sleeping ass lie
out of ass, out of mind
great minds think ass
if an ass is worth doing, it's worth doing well

― ron (ron), Friday, 27 June 2003 05:20 (twenty-one years ago)

to ron, in lame mr. burns voice:

"Ex-cellent."

― jewelly (jewelly), Friday, 27 June 2003 05:35 (twenty-one years ago)

{|:-)

― ron (ron), Friday, 27 June 2003 05:38 (twenty-one years ago)

this is for you two: *praise*

― oops (Oops), Friday, 27 June 2003 05:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Returning to one of my previous titles ... I'd like to share an inspirational poem I having hanging over my headboard.

ASSPRINTS IN THE SAND

One night I dreamt I was sitting on my ass on the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
I noticed that for many scenes there were two sets of assprints,
But during other scenes there was only one.
This pissed me off, so I said, "Lord,
When I agreed to follow You, You said You would always be there for me.
But during the most difficult times in my life, I see only one assprint."
And the Lord said, "O my Child, I have always loved you.
During those trying and difficult times in your life,
It was then that I got up to get you a beer."
And I said, ":-)"
And the Lord said ";=)"
(We were chatting on AIM.)

― jewelly (jewelly), Friday, 27 June 2003 16:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Every Which Ass But Loose

Any Which Ass You Can

Thank You for Bein' an Ass

― jewelly (jewelly), Friday, 27 June 2003 23:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Ass Entertainment!

Let Ass Entertain You

Smile and the Whole Ass Smiles With You

Ass For Victory

― jewelly (jewelly), Friday, 27 June 2003 23:33 (twenty-one years ago)

The Ass Stays in the Picture

Someone Has to Shoot the Ass

― jewelly (jewelly), Friday, 27 June 2003 23:39 (twenty-one years ago)

The Adventures of Ass the Pooh

― jewelly (jewelly), Friday, 27 June 2003 23:39 (twenty-one years ago)

pwned

― Girolamo Savonarola, Friday, 27 June 2003 23:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Ass, We Have a Problem

― jewelly (jewelly), Friday, 27 June 2003 23:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Buffalo Ass, Won't You Come Out Tonight?

By the Light of the Silvery Ass

― jewelly (jewelly), Friday, 27 June 2003 23:58 (twenty-one years ago)

My Ass Is an Actress

― jewelly (jewelly), Saturday, 28 June 2003 00:04 (twenty-one years ago)

St. Ass

― man, Saturday, 28 June 2003 00:15 (twenty-one years ago)

rock 'em sock 'em assbots

― ron (ron), Saturday, 28 June 2003 00:28 (twenty-one years ago)

ass hungry hippos

― ron (ron), Saturday, 28 June 2003 00:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Asses Just Want to Have Fun
an ass short and a day too late
home is where the ass is
to know ass is to love ass
open your ass and say 'ah'

― oops (Oops), Saturday, 28 June 2003 05:59 (twenty-one years ago)

nine months pass...

Good Ass Hunting
While My Ass Gently Weeps
Assemusha
It's an Ass, Ass, Ass, Ass World
The Ass Before Time
"I'm about to lose my ass, and I think I like it"
William Ass Macy
To Live and Die in Ass
In A Lonely Ass
The Asphault Jungle
Kill Ass Vol 2
Assboy
Ass on Fire
Home on the Ass
Scooby Doo 2: Asses Unleashed
The Quiet Ass
Asses of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Ass
The Man with One Red Ass
The Ass Wore Tennis Shoes
Edward Asshands
The Golden Ass of Sinbad

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:21 (twenty-one years ago)

The Ass of Christ

― phil-two (phil-two), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:23 (twenty-one years ago)

The Passion of the Ass!

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Dr. Ass
From Ass With Love
Assfinger
Thunderass
On Her Majesty's Secret Ass
Asses Are Forever
The Man with the Golden Ass
The Ass Who Loved Me
Assraker
For Your Ass Only
Never Say Ass Again
Octoassy
A View to an Ass
The Living Asslights
Ass to Kill
GoldenAss
Ass Never Dies
The Ass is Not Enough

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Bored eh? ;)

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:29 (twenty-one years ago)

to tears

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:30 (twenty-one years ago)

haha! octoassy

― phil-two (phil-two), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:31 (twenty-one years ago)

i wish i had photoshop skillz :(

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:34 (twenty-one years ago)

As the Ass Turns
Guiding Ass
The Bold and the Assiful
Ass Hospital
Days of Our Ass
One Ass to Live
Assions
The Young and the Assless
All My Asses
Another Ass

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Ass
Dawn of the Ass

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Hahah "The Young and the Assless" sounds like something Bender would watch!

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:44 (twenty-one years ago)

I bet I could get a part in a program with that name

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Planet of the Ass
Escape from the Planet of the Ass. . . both already used YES, BUT SOMEONE FORGOT THE STONE COLD CLASSIX
Beneath the Planet of the Ass,
Battle for the Planet of the Ass
and
Wait for IT
Conquest of the Planet of the Ass

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:47 (twenty-one years ago)

Night of the Living Ass
Evil Ass 2
The Texass Asssaw Assacre
Assraiser
Ass Cemetary
Little Ass of Horrors
Don't Be Afraid of the Ass!
The Ass and the Pendulum
Ass 9 From Outer Space
Ass From Another Planet
Der Asspyr
Assylum
The Ass of Dorian Gray
Whatever Happened to Baby Jane's Ass?
Assferatu
Phantom of the Ass
Assfinder General
Rosemary's Ass
The Assorcist
The Asses Have Eyes

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 05:00 (twenty-one years ago)

It's My Ass (And I'll Cry if I Want To)

― jewelly (jewelly), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 05:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Don't Be an Ass to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Ass

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 05:38 (twenty-one years ago)

The Ass Stays in the Picture

(God, this thread is so last ... whenever.)

― jewelly (jewelly), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 05:39 (twenty-one years ago)

ass of jealous lovers

― the surface noise (electricsound), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 05:39 (twenty-one years ago)

MVA: Most Valuable Ass

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 05:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Der Todesass

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 05:41 (twenty-one years ago)

two years pass...

― kingfish doesn't live here anymore (kingfish 2.0), Thursday, 27 April 2006 05:08 (nineteen years ago)

I am honored to have killed this thread for two years.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Thursday, 27 April 2006 06:03 (nineteen years ago)

the aussiest thread in the history of arse

― gem (trisk), Thursday, 27 April 2006 06:19 (nineteen years ago)

Assback Mountain

― Mr Jones (Mr Jones), Thursday, 27 April 2006 06:50 (nineteen years ago)

three years pass...

Assatar
The Importance of Being Assest
The Assing Hour
Night of the Ass Hunter
The Ass Locker
Up in the Ass
Inglorious Ass Turds
Star Trek: The Search for Ass

― hope this helps (Granny Dainger), Monday, 26 April 2010 07:09 (fifteen years ago)

The Unbearable Assness of Being

― hope this helps (Granny Dainger), Monday, 26 April 2010 07:22 (fifteen years ago)

There Will Be Ass

― hope this helps (Granny Dainger), Monday, 26 April 2010 07:27 (fifteen years ago)

Ass, New York
The Ass Ribbon
Clash of the Ass
The Curious Ass of Benjamin Button
Two or Three Things I Know About Ass

― Ward Fowler, Monday, 26 April 2010 07:31 (fifteen years ago)

How I met your ass
Project assway
The Amazing Ass
The Mentalass
Glass

― Super Cub, Monday, 26 April 2010 07:37 (fifteen years ago)

Ass: You Like It
The Ass of Errors
The Taming of the Ass
The Merry Asses of Windass
A Midsummer's Night's Ass
Much Ass About Nothing
The Two Noble Aasmen

lol @ benjamin button

― hope this helps (Granny Dainger), Monday, 26 April 2010 07:37 (fifteen years ago)

Whose Ass Is It Anyway?
Everybody Hates Ass
Extreme Ass: Home Edition
WWE Friday Night SmackAss!
Overassin'
Man vs. Ass
Ass Nightmares
Star Trek: Deep Ass Nine
Dr. Quinn, Ass Woman
Xena: Ass Princess
The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron: Ass Genius
Curb Your Ass
Men of a Certain Ass
Ask This Ass
America's Got Ass
Walker, Ass Ranger
Ass Rehab w/Dr Drew
Mystery Ass Theater 3000
One Hundred Years of Assitude
The Ass Whisperer

― hope this helps (Granny Dainger), Monday, 26 April 2010 08:08 (fifteen years ago)

shit that should be Ask this OLD Ass

― hope this helps (Granny Dainger), Monday, 26 April 2010 08:10 (fifteen years ago)

my friends and I used to do this with "butt". My favorite was:
Alien Butt-urrection

― Fetchboy, Monday, 26 April 2010 08:12 (fifteen years ago)

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