The Things You Do Once And Never Do Again

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

Well?

― Chris Radford (Chris Radford), Monday, 23 June 2003 02:06 (twenty-two years ago)

frequent a theatre restaurant

*shudders at the thought of poor humour in horror get-up*

― Chris Radford (Chris Radford), Monday, 23 June 2003 02:08 (twenty-two years ago)

try to saw corncobs into thirds

― Millar (Millar), Monday, 23 June 2003 02:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Hahaha Chris which one was it? I went to the Looney Bin, the food was DREADFUL (I mean like canned soup dreadful, I've had better at school camps) and the "entertainment" brought a new meaning to the word hell.

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 23 June 2003 02:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Trayce, that one between Lygon and Swanston. Dracula's? or something similarly "scary". it was for a friend's 21st (that's always the excuse isn't it, but i swear it's the truth). the only decent part of the night was the company. as you say, the food was terrible, the stage "performance" lamentable. it all felt extremely awkward.

― Chris Radford (Chris Radford), Monday, 23 June 2003 02:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Get married.

― Bryan (Bryan), Monday, 23 June 2003 02:26 (twenty-two years ago)

brush my teeth with the lights off--I actually somehow got toothpaste in my EYE.

― s1utsky (slutsky), Monday, 23 June 2003 02:26 (twenty-two years ago)

(yet I think I've done it again since then, so never mind)

― s1utsky (slutsky), Monday, 23 June 2003 02:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Buy A Fucking Apple

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Monday, 23 June 2003 02:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Take mushrooms. Overrated really.

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 23 June 2003 02:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Stay awake for 72 hours.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Monday, 23 June 2003 02:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Shave-off my eyebrows as a logical alternative to plucking them. Ugh. Never again.

― I'm Passing Open Windows (Ms Laura), Monday, 23 June 2003 03:43 (twenty-two years ago)

merlot and pizza hut (last night)

― Aaron A., Monday, 23 June 2003 03:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Drink 10 shots of jaeger on an empty stomach.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 23 June 2003 04:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Doing the above that luna just said, but with the added extra variety of being severely allergic to nuts. One trip to the hospital later, and I bet any money my friend wont be drinking jager again! ;)

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 23 June 2003 04:22 (twenty-two years ago)

spend four years getting a useless piece of paper

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 04:24 (twenty-two years ago)

getting blind drunk and chopping vegetables

― Mr. Diamond (diamond), Monday, 23 June 2003 04:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Waking up next to an overweight, sweaty Chinese girl.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 23 June 2003 04:40 (twenty-two years ago)

what if she wasn't sweaty?

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 23 June 2003 04:40 (twenty-two years ago)

doesn't sound that unpleasant to me.

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 23 June 2003 04:47 (twenty-two years ago)

what if she wasn't a girl?

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 04:56 (twenty-two years ago)

what if she wasn't sweaty?

I don't think you understand the degree of overweight I'm talking about here. Not sweaty = not possible.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 23 June 2003 04:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Fat girls need love, too

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 23 June 2003 04:58 (twenty-two years ago)

that's what fat guys are for, not to mention fat lesbians, not to mention fat sheep.

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 04:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Ew. I wouldn't go that far.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:02 (twenty-two years ago)

You're an asshole.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:03 (twenty-two years ago)

indeed

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:04 (twenty-two years ago)

birth
school
work
death

― JesseFox (JesseFox), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:26 (twenty-two years ago)

I feel bad now. (Though not as bad as oops should.) I know fat girls need love, and I've dated a couple, but I run into this wall at some point. I just can't control who I'm sexually attracted to, and it seems to be mostly skinny skinny white girls with no breasts. That's my "thing." Can't explain it, can't apologize for it. In that light, maybe you can better understand how the... ahem... 'large' Chinese woman was a bad idea for me.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:28 (twenty-two years ago)

I didn't mean you, Kenan. Sure, we all like who we like, and that's okay, but saying shit like that really annoys me, even when it's half meant to be funny - sheep? Oops, you fuck.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:31 (twenty-two years ago)

so I should feel bad for making a joke, and Kenan shouldn't for being serious?

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:34 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm not saying either of you should feel bad, I just think that was a really fucked up thing to say.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Welcome to my world bitch

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Oops, I speak from experience here. Put down the drink and go to bed.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:39 (twenty-two years ago)

c'mon folks, play nice.

TOPIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

― Chris Radford (Chris Radford), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:41 (twenty-two years ago)

You sir, are cordially invited to take a big fat bite out of my big fat ass.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:41 (twenty-two years ago)

Can't. There's a sweaty fat chick in it.

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:42 (twenty-two years ago)

(best x-post ever)

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:43 (twenty-two years ago)

You have ceased to make sense.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 23 June 2003 05:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Nice job of trying to distance yourself from me

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 06:03 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.eatabagofdicks.com/bag.gif

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 23 June 2003 06:08 (twenty-two years ago)

You know what to do with 'em.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 23 June 2003 06:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Y'all are way too touchy

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 06:10 (twenty-two years ago)

mmmmm, yummy dicks! and a whole bag at that! wow, Kenan, you're the best. (see, it's a lil thing called having a sense of humor)

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 06:11 (twenty-two years ago)

If that's what dicks look like, boy have some people been lying to me...

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 23 June 2003 06:18 (twenty-two years ago)

TOPIC!!!!!

― colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Monday, 23 June 2003 06:21 (twenty-two years ago)

(Anyway, we were being nice, and since when is there a thread in ILx that doesn't get hijacked in some manner? However...)

I will never again drink an entire bottle of tequila (except for two shots) by myself, as I did one dark night in Colorado.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 23 June 2003 06:22 (twenty-two years ago)

I will never use a metal cock ring again.

― colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Monday, 23 June 2003 06:23 (twenty-two years ago)

I will never again think my carpet is trying to eat me and my family room is sinking in ooze

― oops (Oops), Monday, 23 June 2003 06:26 (twenty-two years ago)

I will never again tie someone hand and foot to a four poster bed and then leave to pee and answer the phone on my way back and have a half hour conversation...

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 23 June 2003 06:28 (twenty-two years ago)

they were tied up and you *left* to pee?

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 23 June 2003 06:54 (twenty-two years ago)

I would totally bite Luna' ass. But anway. . Things I won't do again:

-Date someone who's on the rebound from a marriage
-Rub a splintery drumstick seductively between my breasts

― That Girl (thatgirl), Monday, 23 June 2003 07:03 (twenty-two years ago)

That Girl, you evoke Miss Crabapple's episode with Spinal Tap in The Simpsons with that image.

― colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Monday, 23 June 2003 07:05 (twenty-two years ago)

I thought that was a pot of flowers, I wasn't sure what he was meant to do w/them

― Andrew Thames (Andrew Thames), Monday, 23 June 2003 07:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Colin, I often envoke images of Ms. Krebappel. *sigh*

― That Girl (thatgirl), Monday, 23 June 2003 07:07 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/simpsons/images/340/krabappel1.jpg

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 23 June 2003 07:11 (twenty-two years ago)

You don't have a picture of Edna Krabbappoly do you?

― Andrew Thames (Andrew Thames), Monday, 23 June 2003 07:12 (twenty-two years ago)

they were tied up and you *left* to pee?

Well I realized I needed to go, and thought that would be a better time than perhaps half an hour later. I actually find the stopping to answer the phone bit more disturbing.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 23 June 2003 15:27 (twenty-two years ago)

mmmmmmm watersports.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Monday, 23 June 2003 16:47 (twenty-two years ago)

I will never drink 3 cups of coffee while waiting for someone to come back for lunch again because I really need to pee now.

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 23 June 2003 16:51 (twenty-two years ago)

I will never fall asleep under a car in someones driveway whilst waiting for them to come home again. That was very bad form - and a long time ago.

― toraneko (toraneko), Monday, 23 June 2003 16:56 (twenty-two years ago)

jump onstage at concerts and take my shirt off. i've been saying this for 10 years and i haven't stopped as evident by this past weekends escapades.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Monday, 23 June 2003 17:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Sex in a Miata.

Roadtrip in a Miata.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Monday, 23 June 2003 19:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Most of the men I've slept with -should never have 'done' most of them again but god (and Lara) loves a try-er.

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 23 June 2003 19:21 (twenty-two years ago)

god (and Lara) loves a try-er.

"Special Olympics" Sex?

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Monday, 23 June 2003 19:25 (twenty-two years ago)

They've mostly been able-bodied and minded. Certainly not many medal winners.

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 23 June 2003 19:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Awarding medals after sex. That would be fun. "Congratulations, you get a bronze. Keep trying for the gold, tiger!"

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Monday, 23 June 2003 19:32 (twenty-two years ago)

"He got the red card when he tried for the bronze ring" - one of the best asides I have ever heard.

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 23 June 2003 19:35 (twenty-two years ago)

I'll never go barefoot in a movie theatre again. Tried it when I was 12 and addicted to the feel of the earth beneath my feet. Whatever horrible gunk my skin came into contact with walking on that floor zapped the charm right of barefootin' tho.

― jewelly (jewelly), Monday, 23 June 2003 21:55 (twenty-two years ago)

they were tied up and you *left* to pee?

Well I realized I needed to go, and thought that would be a better time than perhaps half an hour later. I actually find the stopping to answer the phone bit more disturbing.

I like doing the full body bondage thing, with earplugs and a face mask - and then sitting in my favorite chair and reading, while occasionally throwing things at their body (feathers, pillows, ice cubes, etc.).

― I'm Passing Open Windows (Ms Laura), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 00:40 (twenty-two years ago)

I shall never again decide to combine endless numbers of screwdrivers and handfulls of cheetoes. I promise.

― I'm Passing Open Windows (Ms Laura), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 00:40 (twenty-two years ago)

pickles - vodka - herring.

― s1utsky (slutsky), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 00:50 (twenty-two years ago)

What a mess.

― s1utsky (slutsky), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 00:51 (twenty-two years ago)

shaving off all my body hair for a girl. if she could see me now....

*plaits shoulder hair*

― Chris Radford (Chris Radford), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 01:19 (twenty-two years ago)

make a bloody mary using Blackcurrant Vodka (the most awful taste you could imagine)

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 01:20 (twenty-two years ago)

*wretches*

― Chris Radford (Chris Radford), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 01:24 (twenty-two years ago)

I will never again befriend an idiot. Just trying to give her the message that our friendship is kaput, there's no life in it, you and I will never see eye to eye on any damn thing because you are a hopeless, overgrown little kid and I have actually grown up since we were both 14 is giving me fits.

I will never again eat at the horrible Chinese restaurant I stopped at for lunch two weeks ago. The chicken tasted horrible, the vegetables tasted horrible, the steamed rice tasted horrible (!), the egg roll tasted horrible, ugh, it was a mess. I'm going to stick to my usual places now.

I will never burn a music CD on this computer again. I shall wait until I buy a new one to do that.

― Innocent Dreamer (Dee the Lurker), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 01:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Me and political cartoons are through, it isn't worth the lawsuits. (For political cartoons read alcohol, fun with geography, my mate Ted, low flying planes, a misdirected sense of place, or whatever the hell else you want to. It's your metaphor, play with it).

― Matt (Matt), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 01:34 (twenty-two years ago)

I will never again eat at the horrible Chinese restaurant I stopped at for lunch two weeks ago. The chicken tasted horrible

It wasn't chicken...

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:26 (twenty-two years ago)

it was PENIS!!!!

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:28 (twenty-two years ago)

(sorry)

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:28 (twenty-two years ago)

masturbate to a picture of xtina

― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:28 (twenty-two years ago)

masturbate while thinking of jess masturbating to a picture of xtina

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:31 (twenty-two years ago)

luna posted:
It wasn't chicken...

and then e.s.o.j. posted:
it was PENIS!!!!

OMFG, I think I'm going to hurl.

― Innocent Dreamer (Dee the Lurker), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Always a winner:

http://www.rachelleb.com/images/cock_soup.jpg

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Jim and I make a good team.

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:33 (twenty-two years ago)

masturbate while thinking of Dee hurling
wait, who am I kidding...that's gonna become a self-gratification staple

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Why is there a picture of Ben Stiller propped up behind the cock soup?

― That Girl (thatgirl), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Lady, if you have to ask...

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Ben Stiller's Cock Soup. Place emphasis as desired.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:38 (twenty-two years ago)

I want to marry this thread.

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Jim and I make a good team.

Hey! I found a picture of luna and e.s.o.j. online!

http://www.movielandexpress.com/A/abbottcostello.gif

masturbate while thinking of Dee hurling
wait, who am I kidding...that's gonna become a self-gratification staple

I know I should slap you for that, but I can't stop laughing so I'll just thank you for posting that.

― Innocent Dreamer (Dee the Lurker), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:50 (twenty-two years ago)

I have way bigger tits than Abbott.

Okay, maybe not.

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:53 (twenty-two years ago)

i think we're more of a fry and laurie

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 02:54 (twenty-two years ago)

luna: Point taken. Possibly. :)

e.s.o.j.: If you're the Fry & Laurie, who'll be the Fry? Because I have a seriously huge celebrity crush on Stephen Fry and want to know whom I'm going to be lusting over.

― Innocent Dreamer (Dee the Lurker), Tuesday, 24 June 2003 03:01 (twenty-two years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.