Cunty middle aged bitter women in video shops...

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So I'm spending my frist weekend in ages, and so I decide I want to rent "Final Destination 2" and "The Pianist". Not that I rent films that often - I usually don't have the need to - but I missed these two and decide to do so. I make the trek down to the video shop (which is about 5 miles away and I walk every last foot as I like to keep myself fit) and I realise that I can't find my shop card. No problem right?

Well trying telling that to the overweight floozy behind the counter and her wart faced fucking superior who looks like a haggard old cow who badly needs a wash. "Oh we only have your mum's card on file and it was deleted in 1999".

"Yes, well funny how I was able to rent some discs only a couple of months back isn't it?"

"Well we can't find you"

"Oh, well can I rejoin then?"

"Yes you'll need two forms of ID with your address on it"

So I empty my wallet and give them, among other things, my National Insurance card, bank card, student cards from old - all sorts of shit. But, no, they need the address thing even if it's there fucking computer on the blink and my fucking mum is still on there.

So I said "look just fuck off, your hourly wage is shit and you'll not get my business again". And I felt much better. Anyone else feel better after telling some bugger to fuck off?

― Calz (Calz), Saturday, 2 August 2003 16:25 (twenty-two years ago)

...are ANIMALS in bed!

― Sommermute (Wintermute), Saturday, 2 August 2003 17:43 (twenty-two years ago)

And I should know, I married one!

― Sommermute (Wintermute), Saturday, 2 August 2003 17:44 (twenty-two years ago)

We have half a dozen cunty toddler aged bitter children already!

― Sommermute (Wintermute), Saturday, 2 August 2003 17:45 (twenty-two years ago)

And we take them to the video shop browsing for granny porn! It's fun!

― Sommermute (Wintermute), Saturday, 2 August 2003 17:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Now Calz, how is your mom these days?

― Sommermute (Wintermute), Saturday, 2 August 2003 17:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Direct your answer to Al Leong please!

http://www.angryasianman.com/images/angry/alleong.jpg

― Sommermute (Wintermute), Saturday, 2 August 2003 17:48 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm grateful to discover the real name of The Asian Gangster/Terrorist Dude. Thanks!

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Saturday, 2 August 2003 17:55 (twenty-two years ago)

We have half a dozen cunty toddler aged bitter children already!

...and you're going to send all of them around to sit next to me in doctor's offices and nice resteraunts, right?

― Christine 'Green Leafy Dragon' Indigo (cindigo), Saturday, 2 August 2003 21:34 (twenty-two years ago)

I've found that having life experience is often described by younger people as "bitterness", and I've always found that interesting. Perhaps from the point of view of a younger person, telling it like it is/was is too uncomfortable to hear, so it is dismissed as bitterness when it is often in fact, just the facts.

But I'm taking this cunty bitter middle aged thread too seriously ;-)

― Orbit (Orbit), Saturday, 2 August 2003 21:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Don't mean to be nitpicky, but "the unstoppable al leong"!? Has there ever been a movie where a character he plays hasn't been stopped?

― Dan I., Sunday, 3 August 2003 00:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Of course! Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure! No one can stop Genghis Khan!

― Dan I., Sunday, 3 August 2003 01:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh, duh, apparantly he's an unstoppable stunt man

― Dan I., Sunday, 3 August 2003 01:01 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.fantascienza.com/cinema/zardoz/media/dio.jpg

― Sommermute (Wintermute), Sunday, 3 August 2003 07:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Should I phone her manager today and point out she's a cunt? She's beena cunt for years. In 2001 I bought "Idle Hands" ex-rental from the shop (it was cheap and yes it's shit) and it didn't work on my DVD player. Well, it happens. So I took it back wanting a re-fund and she played it on the shop player and refused to give me one, forcing me to pick another title instead.

Fucking cunt. I hope she gets a nasty bum rash.

― Calz (Calz), Sunday, 3 August 2003 09:44 (twenty-two years ago)

ten years pass...

We dont have any threads with cuntishness, cuntish, cuntocitry, cunticentric or cuntry, and only this one with cunty

That cant be right can it

― unw? j.......n (darraghmac), Monday, 10 March 2014 18:25 (eleven years ago)

fucking computer on the blink and my fucking mum is still on there

things that just have to be Derek & Clive lines

― trying to emulate Kirk Cobain with a shrill, shouting voice (DJ Mencap), Monday, 10 March 2014 18:57 (eleven years ago)

I suspect Calz would have a rougher time of it if he posted that here in 2014

― What is wrong with songs? Absolutely nothing. Songs are great. (DL), Monday, 10 March 2014 19:01 (eleven years ago)

calz or anyone tbh

― unw? j.......n (darraghmac), Monday, 10 March 2014 19:04 (eleven years ago)

The early Al Leong reference is most interesting feature of this thread.

― Aimless, Monday, 10 March 2014 19:06 (eleven years ago)

eating hot buttered toast with cunty fingers

― You cannot interrupt his tea stirring because it is his holy trick (imago), Monday, 10 March 2014 19:51 (eleven years ago)

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/6/69/Calum_Waddell.jpg/250px-Calum_Waddell.jpg

― joe perry has been dead for years (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Monday, 10 March 2014 21:12 (eleven years ago)

We dont have any threads with cuntishness, cuntish, cuntocitry, cunticentric or cuntry, and only this one with cunty

That cant be right can it

― unw? j.......n (darraghmac), Monday, 10 March 2014 18:25 (2 hours ago)

deems these grotty suffixes and compound swearwords are for tryhard plebs

― Thanks in anticipation of your opinions (nakhchivan), Monday, 10 March 2014 21:26 (eleven years ago)

you'd need to imagine it in the accents tbrr

― unw? j.......n (darraghmac), Monday, 10 March 2014 21:27 (eleven years ago)

nakh otm it winds me up when I see wannabe brooker-tuckers on my fb feed seasoning their feeble rants with words like idk twatnapkin & being really pleased with themselves

― lames for AnCo (wins), Monday, 10 March 2014 21:38 (eleven years ago)

Obv id only use cuntish/ness i mean hut once they werent there my interest was piqued

Nothing ive seen of brooker makes me think his career is a good idea have i been wrong

― unw? j.......n (darraghmac), Monday, 10 March 2014 21:48 (eleven years ago)

he basically sucks but has brought the odd lol

― lames for AnCo (wins), Monday, 10 March 2014 21:53 (eleven years ago)

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1818500/?ref_=tt_ov_dr

― Ward Fowler, Monday, 10 March 2014 21:56 (eleven years ago)

i know i've discussed henry green's cunty fingers w/ imago somewhere or other on ilx

― Ward Fowler, Monday, 10 March 2014 21:57 (eleven years ago)

aero otm

― goole, Monday, 10 March 2014 21:57 (eleven years ago)

deems these grotty suffixes and compound swearwords are for tryhard plebs

otm

I am partial to the odd bit of "cuntery" tbh but generally speaking the original flavour's the best.

― gyac, Monday, 10 March 2014 21:58 (eleven years ago)

how do people feel about shitcunt

― soref, Monday, 10 March 2014 22:00 (eleven years ago)

^^^

new board description imo

― the tune was space, Monday, 10 March 2014 22:05 (eleven years ago)

was shitcunt something Ray Winstone said originally? have real faint memories of finding it hilarious aged like 20 which, yeah

― trying to emulate Kirk Cobain with a shrill, shouting voice (DJ Mencap), Monday, 10 March 2014 22:14 (eleven years ago)

there is some thinking about shitcunt here

http://theimpostume.blogspot.co.uk/2010/01/is-shitcunt-greatest-expletive-ever-i.html

― soref, Monday, 10 March 2014 22:18 (eleven years ago)

'shitcunt' is east end hardman vernacular, it predates the late 00s london media worker compound swearword phase

― Thanks in anticipation of your opinions (nakhchivan), Monday, 10 March 2014 22:19 (eleven years ago)

Shit Cunt

A cunt who is also shit

Paul, what a shit cunt

by centrelink October 06, 2010

― soref, Monday, 10 March 2014 22:20 (eleven years ago)

used to describe women virtually exclusively

― Thanks in anticipation of your opinions (nakhchivan), Monday, 10 March 2014 22:20 (eleven years ago)

shit birds

― Thanks in anticipation of your opinions (nakhchivan), Monday, 10 March 2014 22:22 (eleven years ago)

Hey Brooker has had a tough life, once a boy from the council estate shoved him and called him a cunt. That's how he became an angry writer and learned how to write laboured sentences.

― xelab, Monday, 10 March 2014 22:49 (eleven years ago)

Shit Cunt
A cunt who is also shit
Paul, what a shit cunt
by centrelink October 06, 2010

this is so perfect

― joe perry has been dead for years (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Tuesday, 11 March 2014 00:07 (eleven years ago)

People got so wound up by CMan back then, now he'd just be laughed out of the place, surely.

― the Bronski Review (Trayce), Tuesday, 11 March 2014 06:28 (eleven years ago)

That's some major revisionist history. He'd have been suggest banned several times over between then and now, with attendant clusterfucks.

― "Endemic. What does that mean, man?" (Branwell Bell), Tuesday, 11 March 2014 06:56 (eleven years ago)

Not sure that sb is even switched on atm tbh, but as a function we seem not to be using it these days.

If waterface has avoided it (i think?) idk

― unw? j.......n (darraghmac), Tuesday, 11 March 2014 08:23 (eleven years ago)

Hey Brooker has had a tough life, once a boy from the council estate shoved him and called him a cunt. That's how he became an angry writer and learned how to write laboured sentences.

― xelab, Monday, March 10, 2014 10:49 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

don't forget about his battered old cock

― trying to emulate Kirk Cobain with a shrill, shouting voice (DJ Mencap), Tuesday, 11 March 2014 08:29 (eleven years ago)

The early Al Leong reference is most interesting feature of this thread.

Yeah, this thread was the first time I learned the name of that guy.

― Tuomas, Tuesday, 11 March 2014 10:16 (eleven years ago)

Not sure that sb is even switched on atm tbh, but as a function we seem not to be using it these days.

so it's like the red light on the bus camera huh

― j., Tuesday, 11 March 2014 12:45 (eleven years ago)

One can only sketch conclusions

― unw? j.......n (darraghmac), Tuesday, 11 March 2014 12:57 (eleven years ago)

― xelab, Monday, March 10, 2014 6:49 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Shit Cunt
A cunt who is also shit

Paul, what a shit cunt

by centrelink October 06, 2010

this is so perfect

― joe perry has been dead for years (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Monday, March 10, 2014 8:07 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

YES!

― Airwrecka Bliptrap Blapmantis (ENBB), Tuesday, 11 March 2014 14:10 (eleven years ago)

Not sure that sb is even switched on atm tbh,

FFS why do people persist with this BS, the only thing that was changed was the name.

― the Bronski Review (Trayce), Tuesday, 11 March 2014 23:51 (eleven years ago)

^trayce, getting it as usual. what happened was that ilx grew up and learned to use restraint. proud of y'alls.

― james franco, Tuesday, 11 March 2014 23:57 (eleven years ago)

^ james franco remembers the sb era. hmmmm. suggestive fact, that.

― Aimless, Wednesday, 12 March 2014 00:04 (eleven years ago)

oh boy, you guys are never gonna get it, huh? back on track though, from the OP of this thread this calum seems like he was a real "piece of shit".

― james franco, Wednesday, 12 March 2014 00:15 (eleven years ago)

you guys are never gonna get it, huh?

back off there, james. I can summon spirits from the vasty deep.

― Aimless, Wednesday, 12 March 2014 00:33 (eleven years ago)

Cunty, Cuntish, Cunted and Cunting Added to Oxford English Dictionary

http://jezebel.com/cunty-cuntish-cunted-and-cunting-added-to-oxford-engl-1543768870

― piscesx, Saturday, 15 March 2014 10:28 (eleven years ago)

otm

― treeship's assailing (darraghmac), Saturday, 15 March 2014 10:30 (eleven years ago)

one year passes...

i know i've discussed henry green's cunty fingers w/ imago somewhere or other on ilx

And here is the interview in question

― Fields of Fat Henry (Tom D.), Saturday, 19 September 2015 23:18 (ten years ago)

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