Lacerations

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So my gf and I are making dinner tonight and I'm slicing up the vegetables. One of the tomatoes is being a little difficult with me, when suddenly I feel a sharp pain and realize that I've sliced my left thumb. I have no idea how bad yet, but I'm howling like I've been mortally wounded. My girl quickly gets me a paper towel and some ice and even lies me down so as to prevent a likely fainting session. That was 6:30. Now it's 10:30, and I've finally gotten in after getting five stitches and a bite to eat afterwards. On the upside, my left hand is now essentially always "thumbs up!" and I had a friend near the hospital come by who I hadn't hung out with for ages. Actually, I think he might apply to work at the hospital now, b/c of this, ironically. Yeah, so I'm rambling, but maybe I'll have a little more to say in a bit. I have to run to the library to return an unwatched copy of the Criterion Nights of Cabiria.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Monday, 4 August 2003 01:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Seriously, what is your problem?

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Monday, 4 August 2003 01:48 (twenty-two years ago)

I have no aim with the knife?

― Girolamo Savonarola, Monday, 4 August 2003 01:51 (twenty-two years ago)

This spring a friend was hosting a big barbecue at her house. I anointed myself grillmeister for the evening and proceeded to kick all kinds of ass, right- steak, chicken, pork chops, buttered onions & potatoes, corn on the cob.

The last turns out quite good, but some dude there at the party suggested that it might be better if the cob was split into shorter sections so that more people could enjoy it. I see the logic in this and head to the kitchen where I attempt to saw a cob into thirds with a serrated knife which was the only thing handy at the time.

About twenty seconds later a sliver off the tip of my left pinky finger is in the kitchen sink and the bathroom looks like a goddamned horror movie. I didn't stop bleeding for hours and hours. Went through 2 band-aids a day for about two weeks. Strangely enough it never hurt very much at all.

― Millar (Millar), Monday, 4 August 2003 01:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Are you trying to piss people off with adding "C/D"? Last time it was "Prison Sex C/D?" whats next, "Getting Analy Raped By A Bat C/D?"?

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Monday, 4 August 2003 01:57 (twenty-two years ago)

A little peek into Mr. Noodles' mind.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 4 August 2003 02:00 (twenty-two years ago)

it could have been worse. it could have been Taking Sides: Lacerations vs Prison Rape

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 4 August 2003 02:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Now I know it only takes four keystrokes to piss Noodles off. Jesus fucking Christ man, take some ludes, get laid, whatever the fuck it takes to kill whatever is up your ass.

C/D?

― Girolamo Savonarola, Monday, 4 August 2003 02:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Don't worry you didn't piss em off, not this time or last.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Monday, 4 August 2003 03:06 (twenty-two years ago)

The man has nerves of elastic. It's awe inspiring. No, really.

― Kim (Kim), Monday, 4 August 2003 03:07 (twenty-two years ago)

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Lacerations - C/D?