Arnold Schwarzenegger: C/D, S/D

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Seriously, now that he's running for Governor of California it's time to evaluate this man's career.

Search: Total Recall, in which Arnold being a mediocre actor doesn't matter because it's so breathless and fully achieved. A really good movie. Predator. I mean, it's not an emotional blockbuster or anything, but it's a beautifully edited, beautifully conceived action movie. The ending could be improved. Last Action Hero is my favorite Arnold performance, I guess. It's a pretty good movie. Much better than True Lies. I don't think *that* highly of the Terminator films but he does find his ideal role in them, even if it strays into camp in the second film. Cameron is clever--that's probably his big virtue, his cleverness in tweaking and reordering aspects of genre films--and these movies hold up OK. The first Conan is a very well-mounted, satisfying adventure movie and not much more. The exposition is laughable (I'm not one to celebrate it for that reason), but the action sequences are good. The sequel is similarly satisfying in a lower key. Same with Red Sonja. All belong to the sort of journeyman good-film that were an endangered species at the time.

Eh: Commando is a run of the mill '80s global-revolution action flick, much less offensive and better-made than say Rambo. Jingle All the Way I saw on a plane and was a serviceable comedy. Arnold reacts well to dumb sight gags and outrageous bit parts. Red Heat. True Lies (actually I HATE parts of that last one).

Destroy: Collateral Damage, of which the less said the better. Twins and Junior, where Arnold is just grotesque. Batman & Robin, which aside from being a abomination in general proves that One SHould Not Cast Arnold in Character Parts.

Ultimately with the exception of Total Recall, the good films are surprisingly close to the bad ones, with the notable exceptions of the "comedies" Twins and Junior. Arnold sort of dictates the overall tone of the film, which renders them effective but ultimately a little dull and distasteful. Neither classic nor dud. Just middling...much like his forebear, Ronald Reagan.

I haven't seen End of Days. Or Eraser. Am I forgetting any?

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:32 (twenty-two years ago)

I think several revisions rendered that post borderline-coherent. Well, I'll give it over to you....

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Pumping Iron

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:37 (twenty-two years ago)

oh, and Hercules in New York obv.

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Stay Hungry's fun too

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh, yeah, early Arnold! I know nothing about him prior to Conan! Do tell!

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Do ANY of his films acknowledge his accent?

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:43 (twenty-two years ago)

first, I love Conan more than just about any other movie.

ha the accent: CtB kinda excuses it cos he's Cimmerian, but then they meet Osric, "once a powerful northman like my master," played by Max von Sydow (ie an actual powerful northman) and he sounds like Olivier.

― g--ff c-nn-n (gcannon), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:47 (twenty-two years ago)

i saw terminator 3 tonight which was enjoyable. classic. more classic: clive james describing him as a 'brown condom stuffed full of walnuts'

― minna (minna), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:47 (twenty-two years ago)

stay hungry's a bob rafelson pic I like more than five easy pieces but nowhere near as much as the last detail, hercules in new york is a thing of wonder (was jimmy coco in that?), pumping iron is tied with the first terminator as THE Schwarzeneggar role/movie - narcissism, mind games, muscles muscles muscles. it's got Lou Ferrigno too. (6 year old me - "why isn't Lou Ferrigno in more movies?").

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:47 (twenty-two years ago)

haha - hercules in new york acknowledges his accent

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Do ANY of his films acknowledge his accent?

I think Last Action Hero did, didn't it? I haven't seen it in a long time, but I thought that was one of its meta jokes.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:48 (twenty-two years ago)

You forgot Kindergarden Cop.

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:49 (twenty-two years ago)

oh, and search search search (still) Schwarzeneggar prank calls

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:52 (twenty-two years ago)

who is your daddy and what does he do?

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Search: Rainer Wolfcastle!!!!

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:53 (twenty-two years ago)

"Up and at them!"

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Last Action Hero makes him a prime candidate for a trial in front of the Aesthetic Atrocities Tribunal.

― Dale the Titled (cprek), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:53 (twenty-two years ago)

what the hell are his politics, anyway?

― j fail (cenotaph), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:57 (twenty-two years ago)

moderate Republican, slightly to the right of Feinstein

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:58 (twenty-two years ago)

oh, and Nazi crony

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:58 (twenty-two years ago)

still, there's no denying Predator's greatness

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Friday, 8 August 2003 18:59 (twenty-two years ago)

I demand more (any) talk about Kindergarten Cop.

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 8 August 2003 19:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Total Recall is pretty darn good, but that has nothing whatsoever to do with Arnold and everything to do with Paul Verhoeven and a script based on a Philip K. Dick story. Anyone could have played that part. In fact, I wish anyone would have. Bruce Willis would have kicked so much ass in that movie.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Friday, 8 August 2003 19:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Kindergarten Cop: provided Arnold with his most famous line apart from "I'll be back": "It's not a tumah!"

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Friday, 8 August 2003 19:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Arnold in 2006: "Tumah years! Tumah years!"

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 19:08 (twenty-two years ago)

And I like the scene where he beats up the child abuser. Inevitable, really. A script that wrote itself if there ever was one.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Friday, 8 August 2003 19:09 (twenty-two years ago)

There's also The Running Man, in which rabid gamblers place bets on who will die in this big fight/maze thing. Based on a Stephen King story, if I remember correctly. A Cinemax classic.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Friday, 8 August 2003 19:13 (twenty-two years ago)

Who would've predicted in 1987 that TWO actors from Predator would someday run for governor (one of whom's already held the title)?

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 8 August 2003 19:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Carl Weathers, meet Karl Rove

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Friday, 8 August 2003 19:14 (twenty-two years ago)

god i want to see Arnold debating the Predator

Arnold: "blah blah AHNULD"

Predator: "ssssssssssssssssssssss"

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Friday, 8 August 2003 19:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Moderator: "You know, you can't just disappear every time you get thrown a tough question!"

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 19:24 (twenty-two years ago)

during Ventura's campaign he referred to himself often as "a sexual tyrannosaurus," which played well in the outer metro suburbs of Mpls/StPl

― g--ff c-nn-n (gcannon), Friday, 8 August 2003 19:30 (twenty-two years ago)

I love True Lies - I know it's weird, but I think Tom Arnold is really funny... (especially in Nine Months!, I know, WTF?)

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Friday, 8 August 2003 19:34 (twenty-two years ago)

good lord!

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Friday, 8 August 2003 19:35 (twenty-two years ago)

I kind of agree. Tom Arnold has some charm, for sure.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Friday, 8 August 2003 20:08 (twenty-two years ago)

the hell?

― g--ff c-nn-n (gcannon), Friday, 8 August 2003 20:10 (twenty-two years ago)

What I saw of True Lies and Tom Arnold's part was indeed funny. Must have been the French influence.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 8 August 2003 20:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Has anyone else noticed that his last name combines two racial slurs into one?

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 20:17 (twenty-two years ago)

''Eh: Commando is a run of the mill '80s global-revolution action flick, much less offensive and better-made than say Rambo.''

eh, no.

I can see what's offensive abt it as its so damn cartoonish.

Rambo is much better. I like the action a pieces a lot more.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Friday, 8 August 2003 20:20 (twenty-two years ago)

TS: Rambo: First Blood Part II vs. Uncommon Valor

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 20:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Commando is better than Rambo

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Friday, 8 August 2003 20:56 (twenty-two years ago)

First Blood > Commando > Rambo

― o. nate (onate), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Has anyone else noticed that his last name combines two racial slurs into one?

Tom Arnold?

― Leee (Leee), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:20 (twenty-two years ago)

Uncommon Valor kicks fuckin ass. Blaster, Wilkes, Sailor(who ruled, grenade around the neck), Johnson, and CHARTS.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:11 (twenty-two years ago)

oh and lets not forget the SWAYZE.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Nobody mentioned The 6th Day. So I will.

Oh, I guess I'm supposed to offer an opinion or something. It was a pleasant and welcome diversion when I was bored out of skull at my mom's place last X-mas. Pretty good sci-fi, with a good performance by Arnold as he's forced to team up with his own clone to defeat the bad guys. He's once again cast as a caring, loving family man. In fact I think the whole reason he's in the pickle in which he finds himself, is because he was trying to procure a clone of the family's recently deceased dog. Something like that. Bob Duvall's in it too.

― Mr. Diamond (diamond), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Bob Duvalls also in "Lets Get Harry' which is a classic. Rick Rossovich.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Total Recall is something else. Never seen a movie so deliberately ugly (especially in the PD department).

Predator 2 4-Ever

― s1utsky (slutsky), Friday, 8 August 2003 23:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Fun fact: David Cronenberg spent about a year in pre-production on a Dino DeLaurentis-backed "Total Recall" before... um, something happened and the project was dropped. I like the Verhoeven version; yeah it's real ugly.

― Sean (Sean), Friday, 8 August 2003 23:20 (twenty-two years ago)

Schwarzenegger employed my brother-in-law. So he was classic. Then he sacked him. So he was dud. Then he rehired him. So, classic.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Saturday, 9 August 2003 01:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Homer: I'd like to buy a Krusty doll, please!
Gypsy: I will sell you a Krusty doll
Homer: That's good.
Gypsy: BUT THE DOLL IS CURSED!
Homer: That's bad.
Gypsy: But it comes with a free cone of yogurt
Homer: That's good!
Gypsy: But the yogurt is also cursed!
Homer: That's bad.
Gypsy: But you get a free choice of toppings...
Homer: That's good!
Gypsy: All of which contain BIDEXTROUSE HINAMIDIAN!
Homer: ...uh...
Gypsy: That's bad.
Homer: Can I go now?

― Girolamo Savonarola, Saturday, 9 August 2003 02:58 (twenty-two years ago)

the dude was the fucking GOD OF CINEMA from 1985 to 1990.

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Saturday, 9 August 2003 19:10 (twenty-two years ago)

http://duffmaru.freeservers.com/ahnuld.jpg

― Chris Barrus (Chris Barrus), Tuesday, 19 August 2003 23:19 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.usatoday.com/life/movies/news/2003-08-18-arnold-dvd_x.htm

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 19 August 2003 23:26 (twenty-two years ago)

that's almost as classic as Predator

― stevem (blueski), Tuesday, 19 August 2003 23:27 (twenty-two years ago)

will bustamante be the first hispanic governor california's elected?

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Tuesday, 19 August 2003 23:31 (twenty-two years ago)

If he wins, yes. He's already the first to have held statewide office since the days of Mexican rule, and while I need to check more thoroughly into his record, I could well end up for voting for him.

― Thy Lethal Zen Ned (Ned), Tuesday, 19 August 2003 23:39 (twenty-two years ago)

he's got enough name recognition already, which was always the stumbling block against Arnie, esp. with one hundred whatever names on the ballot. unless Arnie comes up with a message/issue that really fires up the people or he suddenly starts campaigning ALOT better, I bet Bustamante wins.

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Tuesday, 19 August 2003 23:45 (twenty-two years ago)

With Rob Lowe now backing Arnold, at least they know who will bring the young underage hotties to the election night party.

― earlnash, Wednesday, 20 August 2003 01:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Commando is easily Arnold's best. Great action and really funny. Also, Predator is not a patch on Predator 2.

― gobemouche, Wednesday, 20 August 2003 07:31 (twenty-two years ago)

although its not great, i find it very hard to dislike "Twins"

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Wednesday, 20 August 2003 11:56 (twenty-two years ago)

one year passes...

http://www.defamer.com/hollywood/arnold-before-after.jpg

― firstworldman (firstworldman), Tuesday, 29 March 2005 19:37 (twenty years ago)

his tummy looks like a face!

― latebloomer: AKA Sir Teddy Ruxpin, Former Scientologist (latebloomer), Tuesday, 29 March 2005 20:01 (twenty years ago)

a SAD face!

― Patrick Allan (adr), Tuesday, 29 March 2005 20:02 (twenty years ago)

With hairy eyeballs!

― nickn (nickn), Tuesday, 29 March 2005 20:33 (twenty years ago)

Mongol General: We have won again. That is good! But what is best in life?

Mongolian trainee: The open steppe, fleet horse, falcon on your wrist, wind in your hair!

Mongol General: Wrong! Conan, what is best in life?

Conan: To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women!

Mongol General: That is good.

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Tuesday, 29 March 2005 21:20 (twenty years ago)

two years pass...

Quato's a mutant, so don't get upset when you see 'im.

― kingfish, Thursday, 9 August 2007 04:34 (eighteen years ago)

(partly) Responsible for some of the most entertaining genre films from 1981 to 1991, and some actual great science fiction, too. The Terminator flicks(first two), Predator, Running Man, Total Recall, as well as kick starting the sword & sorcery 80s genre(with thanks to Lucas & Coppola-friend John Milius)

― kingfish, Thursday, 9 August 2007 04:50 (eighteen years ago)

Commando is a riot

― latebloomer, Thursday, 9 August 2007 05:02 (eighteen years ago)

two weeks pass...

fear:

http://imdb.com/gallery/granitz/6108/Events/6108/California_Alexa_14061625_400.jpg.html?path=pgallery&path_key=Schwarzenegger,%20Arnold

― kingfish, Friday, 24 August 2007 04:52 (eighteen years ago)

ten months pass...

http://www.myspace.com/goretorture

About GORETORTURE

GORETORTURE plays Commando Brutal Death Metal exclusively

The idea for Goretorture came in a one cold morning of 2004 winter, when Gurglenator thought about combining two of his favorite subjects: Schwarzenegger quotes & brutal death metal!

― latebloomer, Thursday, 26 June 2008 05:15 (seventeen years ago)

one year passes...

http://eeuauaughhhuauaahh.ytmnd.com/

― \(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Tuesday, 25 August 2009 03:03 (sixteen years ago)

two years pass...

Twins 2. My brain.

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 13 July 2012 14:17 (thirteen years ago)

Oh and I missed THIS detail:

Back in March, The Hollywood Reporter first revealed that Universal and Montecito Picture Co. were working on developing a sequel to Twins entitled Triplets which would bring back Schwarzenegger, his co-star Danny DeVito, and introduce Eddie Murphy as their long-lost third brother.

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 13 July 2012 14:18 (thirteen years ago)

I'm actually kind of looking forward to it! Yeah it'll be terrible but he's like Nic Cage to me, I'll see anything he's in. Schwarzenegger has always been a hero to me. When I was 9 my Dad was a Major in the Air Force on the other side of the country (my parents had just divorced). He winds up meeting Arnold at some military event and he calls me and somehow convinces him to talk to me on the phone for half a minute or so...I don't remember exactly what he said he did refer to me by name, and as a 9-year old that was pretty much the greatest thing that ever happened to me.

― frogbs, Friday, 13 July 2012 14:34 (thirteen years ago)

All downhill from there, then?

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 13 July 2012 14:37 (thirteen years ago)

That was around 1995, so it kinda was for both of us

― frogbs, Friday, 13 July 2012 14:42 (thirteen years ago)

two months pass...

The ex-governator in his labyrinth.

― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 18 September 2012 02:44 (thirteen years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJLgUjBGjm0

― buzza, Tuesday, 25 September 2012 05:20 (thirteen years ago)

four months pass...

http://ll-media.tmz.com/2013/01/30/0130-arnold-schwarzenegger-document-tmz-2.jpg

― am0n, Thursday, 31 January 2013 19:55 (thirteen years ago)

lollllllll

― frogbs, Thursday, 31 January 2013 20:11 (thirteen years ago)

one year passes...

http://youtu.be/FeHpSdQSH0c

Why wasn't I aware this was opening soon??

― christmas candy bar (al leong), Monday, 24 March 2014 17:26 (eleven years ago)

five years pass...

you know what, he’s genuinely really good in twins

― michael keaton IS jim thirlwell IN ‘foetaljuice’ (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 3 May 2019 19:53 (six years ago)

Is the movie good other than him? I've been hesitant to revisit it.

― ☮ (peace, man), Sunday, 5 May 2019 00:51 (six years ago)

Just watch terminator again instead

― the public eating of beans (Sparkle Motion), Sunday, 5 May 2019 00:54 (six years ago)

He's great in Total Recall.

― Josh in Chicago, Sunday, 5 May 2019 01:48 (six years ago)

I’m watching Terminator 1 right now. Every time I come back to it I’m surprised at how great it is. I guess Arnold doesn’t have a lot of room to flex in it, but he’s absolutely perfect and I’m reminded of just how fucking good Cameron can be. Ruthlessly intense, doom-laden film.

― circa1916, Sunday, 5 May 2019 02:24 (six years ago)

Just watch terminator again instead
― the public eating of beans (Sparkle Motion), Sunday, May 5, 2019 12:54 AM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
He's great in Total Recall.
― Josh in Chicago, Sunday, May 5, 2019 1:48 AM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol. I've watched both of those in the past few months.

― ☮ (peace, man), Monday, 6 May 2019 18:24 (six years ago)

And he's great in them!

― Josh in Chicago, Monday, 6 May 2019 18:26 (six years ago)

he is legitimately outstanding in Escape Plan

― omar little, Monday, 6 May 2019 20:30 (six years ago)

probably the closest modern comparison to Arnold would be Dwayne Johnson, but I think Arnold is a better actor. Johnson is maybe more naturally charismatic and more of a goofy dude but I think Schwarzenegger has an intensity and ambition w/his projects that the Rock doesn't compare to.

― omar little, Monday, 6 May 2019 20:33 (six years ago)

two years pass...

Coming February 2022. pic.twitter.com/ey0w4HZXnb
— Arnold (@Schwarzenegger) January 27, 2022

― Josh in Chicago, Thursday, 27 January 2022 18:13 (four years ago)

I'm not an expert on the subject but he doesn't strike me as very Greek sounding

― Ár an broc a mhic (darraghmac), Thursday, 27 January 2022 18:22 (four years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U7MUP0FImZo

― Being cheap is expensive (snoball), Thursday, 27 January 2022 19:05 (four years ago)

I'm not an expert on the subject but he doesn't strike me as very Greek sounding
― Ár an broc a mhic (darraghmac), Thursday, January 27, 2022 1:22 PM (forty-three minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

It's my understanding that he has actually had to work with a dialect coach to retain his trademark Austrian accent since moving to America. If that's the case, maybe he could make the pivot.

― peace, man, Thursday, 27 January 2022 19:14 (four years ago)

I bet Arnold is going to be great in whatever Super Bowl commercial that's for

― reggae mike love (polyphonic), Thursday, 27 January 2022 19:30 (four years ago)

Oh, that makes so much sense.

― peace, man, Thursday, 27 January 2022 19:34 (four years ago)

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