In honor of our/friend Haikunym, write all your/answers in haiku

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Does that sound fair to you?
I'm not sure what the subject
should be, however.

Usually, there's an
overarching topic put
on display above.

This time, however,
I just thought I would try to
have a format thread.

― M Matos (M Matos), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:10 (twenty-two years ago)

arrgh! I totally
fucked up the first line of my
first 'ku! six, not five

― M Matos (M Matos), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:15 (twenty-two years ago)

It is fine, Matos
You will not be mocked here though
In chat, we will laugh

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:23 (twenty-two years ago)

What a great idea
to honour Haikunym so!
Those posts make me smile.

― C J (C J), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:23 (twenty-two years ago)

wondertwin powers,
activate... form of a friend
who is weird like me.

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:24 (twenty-two years ago)

It's easily done
To count syllables is quite
hard particularly if one isn't paying attention.

― Matt (Matt), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:24 (twenty-two years ago)

I really like this
putting posts in haiku form
because of two things:

One, it keeps people
From becoming too snarky
(levity, you see);

Two, the restrictive
Form of haiku forces one
To post thoughtfully.

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Shit bugger poo piss
Amateurist is quite right
I am most thoughtful!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Concentrate Matt! It's
not that difficult to do.
Count on your fingers!

― C J (C J), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:27 (twenty-two years ago)

this is excellent!
haikunym deserves a thread.
helluva guy, he.

― The Four Singing Beatles (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:28 (twenty-two years ago)

Heavens! Ned just swore!
I sit here stunned and amazed
by language most foul :(

― C J (C J), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:30 (twenty-two years ago)

There comes a time when
We heed a certain call and I
Did that now...sorry.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:30 (twenty-two years ago)

These sins against the
masters Basho and Issa --
unforgivable.

― weatheringdaleson (weatheringdaleson), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:30 (twenty-two years ago)

It is true that we
All insult Japanese ways
And yet it is fun

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Haiku, I can do.
But I'm very glad he's not
called Sestinanym.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:33 (twenty-two years ago)

don't be a rockist.
please do not be a rockist.
don't be a rockist.

― The Four Singing Beatles (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Fun - yes! But I fear
That I shall talk in this way
all day tomorrow

― C J (C J), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Fear not dear C J

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:35 (twenty-two years ago)

If Basho lived now,
and posted to ILX,
he'd be arguing

for the inclusion
of Tatu and S Club 7
in the pop canon.

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Grr

Fear not dear CJ
For tomorrow you will find
That all is normal

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:35 (twenty-two years ago)

exquisitecorpsenym?
renganym? hey, the mind reels.
let's stick to haiku.

― The Four Singing Beatles (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Does Haikunym talk
all day long in haiku rhyme?
Or just on this board?

― C J (C J), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:37 (twenty-two years ago)

I still hate haikus
Was forced to make them in school
Thus, this feels like work

Possibly in time
The joy of haiku shall come
More fun already

― oops (Oops), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Only on this board;
He was a rambler once but
Brevity ownz him

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:38 (twenty-two years ago)

It is late here now
and I must get some sleep, so
I bid you goodnight

― C J (C J), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:39 (twenty-two years ago)

am i the only
one who finds this annoying?
I guess I hate fun.

― Mr. Diamond (diamond), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:39 (twenty-two years ago)

the master rises, reads
and rolls on his mat
daleson OTM

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Haikunymn is Real.
He speaks in haiku all day
and everywhere:

"Excuse me, waiter.
There is a fly in my soup.
Please get rid of it."

"I'd like to report
a robbery in progress
at the bank next door."

"Make sure that you don't
mix whites and colors again.
I'll be back at six."

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:41 (twenty-two years ago)

oops, cross-post with oops
I see that we both agree
on this here issue

― Mr. Diamond (diamond), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:41 (twenty-two years ago)

Haikunym's haiku
are heavenly. They're so nice
I am coming twice.

― Jesus (Chris Piuma), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Jesus, I had thought
that only girls could do that.
That shows what I know!

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Okay, Basho sucks,
but Issa's done some great stuff.
Check out this hot link.

― weatheringdaleson (weatheringdaleson), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Poor Amateurist
Never had more than one cum
O! his women friends!

― oops (Oops), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:47 (twenty-two years ago)

If you put pressure
upon your perinium
you too can see God.

― Jesus (Chris Piuma), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Jesus, I had thought
that only girls could do that.
That shows what I know!

Maybe J's femme
Real-life virgin births occur:
Parthenogen'sis.

(Okay, that sucked some --
too many abbrevs in there --
but I tried, I tried)

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:49 (twenty-two years ago)

(And "J's" is "J is,"
which means I needn't have that
abbreviation!)

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Not too surprising:
Discussion shifts to semen
Even in this form

― Marcel Post (Marcel Post), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:52 (twenty-two years ago)

I am shocked to see
Tep has questioned my manhood!.
I have twelve answers.

― Jesus (Chris Piuma), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:53 (twenty-two years ago)

(Autoerotic)
Smut lends itself to the beat.
(Asphyxiation)

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Sorry there sunshine,
Didn't mean to denigrate
the dingle divine.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 8 August 2003 21:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Fools! Everyone knows
that Jesus has no organ,
neither east nor west!

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Jesus, a eunuch?
My hopes for divine glory
Are now rendered smooth

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:02 (twenty-two years ago)

The cock of the walk
(on water, viz Matt's Gospel)
that's the Son of Man.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Posts on other threads
Are now read in this rhythm
How to make it stop?

― oops (Oops), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Don't don't stop the beat
Give in to five-seven-five
For Baby Jesus

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:13 (twenty-two years ago)

Big Baby Jesus
I can't wait, n**ga fuck that
I can't wait (and repeat)

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Whoops!

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:16 (twenty-two years ago)

The anarchic rhymes
Of the Ol' Dirty Bastard
Refuse containment!

― amateurist (amateurist), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Nix the "and" and and
(ditto just now to make sense)
it's all good, cowboy.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Read Leo Steinberg:
It is all about art and
Jesus's package.

― rosemary (rosemary), Friday, 8 August 2003 22:20 (twenty-two years ago)

Skipping 75 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

So many, many
impure thoughts and snickerings
from "lick her shaped hole."

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 9 August 2003 01:27 (twenty-two years ago)

explodededed
my big fat head has done been
explodededed

― nnnh oh oh nnnh nnnh oh (James Blount), Saturday, 9 August 2003 01:29 (twenty-two years ago)

So many sad men
Sitting alone Friday night
Counting syllables.

― Marcel Post (Marcel Post), Saturday, 9 August 2003 01:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Guess I'm a killjoy
I've scared everyone away,
Maybe depressed them.

― Marcel Post (Marcel Post), Saturday, 9 August 2003 01:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Clearly it is time
To retire for the night; think
My own impure thoughts.

― Marcel Post (Marcel Post), Saturday, 9 August 2003 01:43 (twenty-two years ago)

I L X women
come and go, talking about
Michelangelo.

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 9 August 2003 01:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Here's what we have learned:
Women like complex dildos;
Men, Japanese verse.

― Marcel Post (Marcel Post), Saturday, 9 August 2003 01:51 (twenty-two years ago)

don't know what to say
you all make me laugh and blush
even those who hate

(I do not claim that
I'm Basho, Buson, Issa
or even Shiki--

I can bust it out
classic style if I want to
weatheringdaleson)

but for those with love
electronic friends of mine
thank you. from my heart.

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Saturday, 9 August 2003 01:55 (twenty-two years ago)

I ain't no hatah!
And I hope you are my friend
(insert smiley here).

― weatheringdaleson (weatheringdaleson), Saturday, 9 August 2003 02:37 (twenty-two years ago)

I did not mean to
offend Chris V in the least!
I apologize.

― amateurist (amateurist), Saturday, 9 August 2003 03:08 (twenty-two years ago)

I love Haikunym
Because his schtick is unique --
Honoring numbers!

Five, seven, and five --
Those are the honored numbers
In proper order.

I also adore
luna and her absolute
Sweetness and kindess.

Many hugs to all
Who consume this post of mine.
I am happy now.

― Just Deanna (Dee the Lurker), Saturday, 9 August 2003 03:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh my dearest stars!
I meant to type "kindness" there.
I am so sorry.

― Just Deanna (Dee the Lurker), Saturday, 9 August 2003 03:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Anthony Bourdain
Is on Food TV right now!
I am too giddy.

― Just Deanna (Dee the Lurker), Saturday, 9 August 2003 03:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Thanks, Just Deanna,
for adding some much-needed
feminine haiku.

Dear God, was that me
writing of ass and sewage?
I blame it on men.

― jewelly (jewelly), Saturday, 9 August 2003 03:33 (twenty-two years ago)

I amaze myself,
keeping count of syllables
while shit-faced on wine.

― jewelly (jewelly), Saturday, 9 August 2003 03:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Not shit-faced really,
but pretty buzzed nonetheless
and ready for bed.

― jewelly (jewelly), Saturday, 9 August 2003 03:38 (twenty-two years ago)

"Shit-faced," says jewelly.
Ass and sewage, says jewelly.
And she blames the men?

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 9 August 2003 03:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Tep, I sensed you here.
Your testosterone corrupts
when you're just lurking.

― jewelly (jewelly), Saturday, 9 August 2003 03:51 (twenty-two years ago)

whatever drunken
point I was trying to make
I have forgotten

it is obvious
both that I am no poet
and that I need beer.

― luna (luna.c), Saturday, 9 August 2003 03:54 (twenty-two years ago)

You don't need to rhyme
or watch the meter to know
when it's Miller time.

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 9 August 2003 03:58 (twenty-two years ago)

(My chromsomes
got you all in check. Better
recognize. XY.)

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 9 August 2003 04:00 (twenty-two years ago)

I will recognize
your XY if you agree
to bite my fat ass.

― luna (luna.c), Saturday, 9 August 2003 04:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp
chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp
chomp chomp. Recognize.

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 9 August 2003 04:07 (twenty-two years ago)

I now recognize
Tep and the power of his
chromosomes. Word, yo.

― luna (luna.c), Saturday, 9 August 2003 04:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Do I dare ask why
you make a big production
out of your XY?

― jewelly (jewelly), Saturday, 9 August 2003 04:10 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm a B O Y.
Why X Y? Drink Bud Dry. And
... sweet potato pie.

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 9 August 2003 04:14 (twenty-two years ago)

It took far too long
for you to think of and write
that lame-ass shit, Tep.

;)

― jewelly (jewelly), Saturday, 9 August 2003 04:16 (twenty-two years ago)

It took four minutes!
I could not remember the
name of the damn beer!

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 9 August 2003 04:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Four minutes wasted.
You should have been thinking
about other things.

― jewelly (jewelly), Saturday, 9 August 2003 04:21 (twenty-two years ago)

I was downloading
mp3s and making CDs!
None for jewelly. Nyah.

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 9 August 2003 04:23 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm thinking about
flowers and running barefoot
through fields. I'm a girl

― jewelly (jewelly), Saturday, 9 August 2003 04:25 (twenty-two years ago)

That's girl code for sex.
I read I L X. (or E)
I used to play Gex.

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 9 August 2003 04:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Penniless in Po-
land, passport stolen, hungry.
My son, far from home...

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Saturday, 9 August 2003 05:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Hungover all day,
I had a beer after work--
Now everything's fine.
Hard to say enough
About the joy when liquor
Fills liquor-shaped hole.

GENIUS MARCEL!

― Ronan (Ronan), Saturday, 9 August 2003 10:36 (twenty-two years ago)

jewelly, you are
Better than those silly boys
With their X Y pride.

(I am so kidding
Here -- I love everybody.
No, I am not drunk.)

I'll need to leave now.
Woke up too early for a
Saturday morning.

― Just Deanna (Dee the Lurker), Saturday, 9 August 2003 12:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Enough! I did not
start this thread for boys to wag
their dicks around! Cease!

― M Matos (M Matos), Saturday, 9 August 2003 16:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Every thread you make,
regardless of the topic,
invites dick-wagging.

― jewelly (jewelly), Saturday, 9 August 2003 16:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Me personally?
What kind of cryptic insult is
that supposed to be?

― M Matos (M Matos), Saturday, 9 August 2003 16:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Why would I insult
YOU, who started this great thread?
I meant "anyone."

― jewelly (jewelly), Saturday, 9 August 2003 17:03 (twenty-two years ago)

My Father made dicks
to be waggèd. Do this in
remembrance of me.

― Jesus (Chris Piuma), Saturday, 9 August 2003 17:33 (twenty-two years ago)

I apologize
to Jewelly, whose answers I
generally enjoy.

― M Matos (M Matos), Sunday, 10 August 2003 04:30 (twenty-two years ago)

(paranoia strikes
deep in me these days it seems.
I have to watch that.)

― M Matos (M Matos), Sunday, 10 August 2003 04:33 (twenty-two years ago)

I've never seen my
next-door neighbor for the year
I've lived where I live.

But tonight I saw
And was struck quite dumb with awe.
He's HAWWT as all Hell!

― jewelly (jewelly), Sunday, 10 August 2003 05:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Tonight I met a
girl with an English accent
who grew up in France

She was beautiful
and outspoken to boot!
(Where do they *come* from?)

― amateurist (amateurist), Sunday, 10 August 2003 07:55 (twenty-two years ago)

France, apparently.
So I'm reviving this thread
after a remission.

― M Matos (M Matos), Thursday, 21 August 2003 20:56 (twenty-two years ago)

If this thread is not
in remission, does that mean
it's metastasized?

― amateurist (amateurist), Thursday, 21 August 2003 21:06 (twenty-two years ago)

beats the fuck out of
me, dude. all i know is i'm
all lowercase now.

― M Matos (M Matos), Thursday, 21 August 2003 21:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Matos: the bell hooks
of the indie newspapers.
It's a new by-line!

― amateurist (amateurist), Thursday, 21 August 2003 21:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Matt C, dude, posting
in Estonian! What is
the world coming to?

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Thursday, 21 August 2003 22:16 (twenty-two years ago)

The world is coming
to resemble a country
called Estonia.

― amateurist (amateurist), Thursday, 21 August 2003 22:17 (twenty-two years ago)

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