I asked for it ... I got it ... Now I'm miserable.

I thought that. I also noted that the character being chased was holding a video camera and that maybe we would see the chase from the camera's point of view when he watched the tape later on. But he's watched the tape and we haven't seen the chase and after racing through eighty pages or so, EXPECTING the chase in flashback, I've come to realize that either there won't be one or, by the time there is one, it'll be too late. Even if there is one, and even if there's an intelligent reason behind his omission of the sequence in its chronological place, it's such a clumsy choice it drives me crazy and taints my appreciation of other stuff -- and there is some really good stuff. Anyway, I'm going to finish it today, I'm just procrastinating right now.

But thanks, s1utsky, I understand what you're sayin' ...

Has he revised it or is it a first draft? That sounds like a typical "hmm, this needs to happen, but I don't feel like actually writing it at the moment" dodge.

If you don't want it to sound even like constructive criticism, you can just say something like "Boy, that chase scene would've been cool to see, too," maybe.

There are a bunch of other things that bother me and that I would criticize if my opinion had been solicited, but since it hasn't I read it picking out all the things I like and will mention when I e-mail him. I'm such a finicky and hyper-critical reader. But the chase scene omission is so huge and basic and noticeable I feel I can't not say something, even though a professional editor at a publishing firm apparently didn't ....

Can he write such scenes? I'm inclined to think that writing a chase scene could be pretty hard to do well (one of those things that works better with visuals than words, I think), so he might have skipped it for that reason.

Yeah, there are some decent action sequences later on -- it's not like he's shying away from action; it's supposed to be a suspense novel!! But the novel is written in first person and he does have a way of over-explaining or in general being too self-conscious about surprising and/or unusual choices the character makes ... which is one of those annoying things I will NOT be criticizing when I finally respond.

Weird. Well, if he's already working with a publisher, I wouldn't mention it, or at least not make a big deal out of it. Just stick to "I liked it/didn't like it/this was my favorite part" ... unless he asks for elaboration, and you could always add, "Well, there was this one thing..."

*remembers book = history of music and technology*

*leaves it in anyway*

1. Skip through the rest of the book reading the odd bit here and there and blag together an e-mail of praise. (He's your friend; that's more important than being honest.)

2. Include the following in the e-mail:

I do have a couple of constructive criticisms, but I won't pass them on to you unless you want me to.

He will ask for them. Then come up with the stuff about the chase.

You can do this by tomorrow. Weight off your back. He'll never know you didn't read it in depth.

Although I also talked to a mutual friend of ours who has read it and also wasn't impressed. She thinks I should lay my critique on the line. She did, apparently, and their still friends. So, I dunno.

As for doing as you'd like to be done to. Think of this for a minute. People sometimes say they like your hair, your clothes, whatever, right? A lot of that is social guff - the sort of thing that makes the world go round. No doubt people sometimes dislike your hair or your clothes. How would you like it if - and I'm not talking about your evil little sister here - they told you what they were thinking?