How Old You Are And How Comfortable You Are With This

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At what age do you start to obsess about the (over)achievements of those younger than you? At what age do you start to become conscious that younger people than you are have made/are making gigantic successes of their lives in ways that you'd love to emulate but feel you never could? At what age (if ever) do you feel you should discard wildest dreams and ambitions as unrealistic imaginings and start to do something altogether more secure and sensible?

This has all been asked in various forms before now; is not intended to send everyone spiralling glumwards. On relection the thread title doesn't fit the questions at all but I will leave it.

― Alex in Rotherham (Alex in Doncaster), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 09:16 (twenty-two years ago)

I've never really obsessed about the overachievements of younger people, more people my age (give or take a year). From about 25-28 I was at my most uncomfortable in terms of how old I was and what I was doing with my life. Now I'm much more relaxed. Discarding dreams and imaginings wasn't really an issue - my problem always was that I could never settle on a dream or imagining for long enough to even regret not doing something about it.

Oh I'm 30 by the way.

― Tom (Groke), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 09:20 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm 27 now & I am always thinking about how it's too late to do whatever. I always look at younger people & I want to urge them to do stuff before they get much older. I have certain dreams or aspirations that I still hold on to, but there are some that I've had to kiss goodbye!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 09:22 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm 24 and have done jack-shit. My school-mates are in Muse or playing for Leeds United. I would be gutted by this if I wasn't generally a happy chap. I do, howver, intend to do great things from the age of 30 onwards. Just you wait and see.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 09:22 (twenty-two years ago)

(I should mention that I am 22 and I am finding Busted hugely disconcerting, although I have no wish to emulate them)

― Alex in Rotherham (Alex in Doncaster), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 09:27 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm 25 and am completely behind my peers in career terms, but it doesn't bother me much - I have little ambition in that area. One of my best friends (same age as me) is head of maths at a FE college which is scary and hilarious. I often feel I'm not doing enough with my life generally, but don't usually relate it to others' achievements. Which isn't to say that I don't get horribly jealous sometimes, usually where creative success is concerned.

― Archel (Archel), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 09:32 (twenty-two years ago)

My school-mates are in Muse or playing for Leeds United. I would be gutted by this if I wasn't generally a happy chap. I do, howver, intend to do great things from the age of 30 onwards.

Indeed. If I were you, I would have been pissed off I didn't pre-emptively firebomb my school in 1991.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 09:33 (twenty-two years ago)

This thread is just an attempt to lure N. back isn't it?

― Jerry the Nipper (Jerrynipper), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 09:35 (twenty-two years ago)

I did get detention for setting fire to a bin in about 1993, so you know, I fucking tried.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 09:35 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm 25 but I started worrying about people being younger and more successful than me when I was about....12

― stevem (blueski), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 09:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Not really bcz I don't have ambitions or anything like that so its no use trying to compare myself to others.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 09:40 (twenty-two years ago)

like tom i was most concerned with what i was going to make of my life in my mid twenties. i'm now 32 and very happy with my life. my main ambition is to have satisfying personal relationships with my family and friends and right now that's happening. i lost interest in aiming for fame, fortune, creating great works, power, etc., when i realised that those things weren't really what i wanted in life and would not make me happy.

as far as comparing myself with others goes, i've never really done that. it seems pointless, no matter what you do there'll always be someone who you could view as being better than you in any given field, yet at the same time they may have awful stuff in their lives that is totally unenviable.

the whole do x by age y thing has never bothered me at all. there's a good bit of longevity in my family so i still feel like there's time for anything i'd fancy doing (none of which involves breaking any 'youngest ever x' records).

― angela (angela), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 09:55 (twenty-two years ago)

I've never had much ambition, and I suppose I'm doing alright. Not all that happy though, and my life lacking direction has a lot to do with that.

― Ricardo (RickyT), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 10:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Fairly irrelevant side-question thing: how easy do you find it to avoid making comparisons between yourself and others?

― Alex in Rotherham (Alex in Doncaster), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 10:07 (twenty-two years ago)

haha from quite a young age i admired janacek, who didn't start major composition until he wz in his 70s (i think he became sexually obsessed w.a woman a third his age and possibly also married her...) (hmmm maybe i made that bit up)

john dowland didn't start composing till his wife died, again in his 70s

fact: i am tremendously lazy

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 10:10 (twenty-two years ago)

the only thing i'm sad about is not having done more band stuff when i was younger (for i am now 28), but in truth it doesn't really matter, especially considering i was, er, somewhat unlikely to get groupies anyway.

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 10:13 (twenty-two years ago)

i've done a lot better than many of my older friends, in a lot of ways..

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 10:14 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm 24 going on 35. I live in suburbia and have dinner parties.

Seriously though, I often have moments that are just "WOAH - fuck. I'm a grown-up". Not because I feel that I should have done more in my time (I am lazier than mark s FACT) but because I always imagine that everybody is older than I am and it's always a surprise when they're not.

― j0e (j0e), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 10:26 (twenty-two years ago)

N. to thread.

― David. (Cozen), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 10:32 (twenty-two years ago)

(Is N. on ILSabbatical?)

― David. (Cozen), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 10:51 (twenty-two years ago)

he's posting some nonsense abt bowie on ilm as we speak

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 10:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Today is a good day for this thread! I've always been a type A personality, and there was a long list of achievements that I would have liked to have accomplished by now and I've only accomplished a small fraction of them. The more I think about it though, the more I realize that even if I had a accomplished a lot more by now I still wouldn't be happy because it's in my nature to have almost unrealistically high expectations for myself.

― Larcole (Nicole), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 11:05 (twenty-two years ago)

I look at people, ok other girls & i get pangs of jealousy sometimes. i think it's natural to be slightly envious of someone who has got things that you want.

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 11:06 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm 21 and incredibly insecure about this sort of thing and have this hard, fast cut-off line in my head that I guage everything against (even though people like Janacek and Ian Wright) when I'm trying to pucker up some self-esteem: 27. If you've not done it or at least started by 27 then you won't. This is quite a golden rule, I find, when thinking about novelists / poets. When I look at the little biogs inside (which I do religiously) my eyes scan for the 26 / 27 / 28 so that at 21 I still have that order, that aspirant age far away enough to not worry, close enough to reach in good time, in good stead. I'm sure, or even if it is just in my head, but Fitzgeral, Paterson, Kennedy, all novelist / poets I love published their first books in and around that age. And I'm not sure I even want to be that sort of writer anymore ('poems / novels: out-dated writing form' &c.) but I still retain that line in the sand that fills my head.

― David. (Cozen), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 11:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm 28. I accomplished a lot when I was very young, then took time off and everyone else caught up to me. Now I've got a bunch of books coming out. For the most part, I don't care about the accomplishments of younger people, older people, whatever, in my field -- but I do occasionally crinkle the newspaper in mild frustration reading another "more hot writers under 21!!" article. That's the kind of trend you just have to sit through, though.

28 and 27 feel a lot older than 26 and 25 did, in a way -- I've mentioned before that, physically, all my aging in my twenties seems to have been compressed into three months around my 27th birthday -- but by the same token, my 20s have been sort of a second adolescence in some ways. In my mid-teens, I was living alone while finishing high school, and taking care of my own (non-financial) needs; in my late teens, I was raising three kids. After that, it was pretty much one cake walk after another.

A ways back, I gave myself various goals for writing -- do X before age Q, do Y before age Z, and the last of them was "when you're 30, you should have enough information to decide whether or not you can write full time and pay the bills." 30's coming up awful quick, considering the slow turnaround for novels, but I'm pretty sure the answer's going to be "yes." And fuck, I don't know what else I'd do anyway, they'd kick me out of graduate school eventually.

I made a list recently of the novels I'd feel comfortable starting right now and would write if I had the time, and stopped at fifteen -- I need to write full-time just cause I'm gonna run out of time, period, otherwise, and leave too much stuff undone, dammit.

― Tep (ktepi), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:27 (twenty-two years ago)

David - Virginia Woolf said that no one should write poetry after 30 and no one should write novels before 30. That's my guideline. 30-70 is a long, long time.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:31 (twenty-two years ago)

32 years old, perfectly happy with it. Life's good, I figure! Bring on the rest of it.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:33 (twenty-two years ago)

NED RAGGETT IS AN OLDE MAN.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:35 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm 23 and I don't really give a fuck. My dad thinks I'm about 30 for some reason. So did like 90% of ILX?? WTF?

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:40 (twenty-two years ago)

It's your own fault, Ally! You used to claim you were older than I am. ;-)

― Larcole (Nicole), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:41 (twenty-two years ago)

Haha yeah but that's cos I was like 14 at the time! I cannot be held responsible for what happened ten years ago!!

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Kids go to prison at 14, so consider this part of your sentence.

― Larcole (Nicole), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:44 (twenty-two years ago)

i am 30 and i'm a bit irked abt it... ally i thought you were about 40...

― Dave Stelfox (Dave Stelfox), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Your crime is time and it's EIGHTEEN AND LIFE TO GO!

― Larcole (Nicole), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Arrrgh this truly is punishment for my deceitfulness.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:47 (twenty-two years ago)

don't worry you don't look 40 was just kidding. i just diodn't want to stop being in my 20s, that's all - other than that i don't really care. it's not the age that matters as much as not having done a few things i'd like to yet...

― Dave Stelfox (Dave Stelfox), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:50 (twenty-two years ago)

ALLY IS AN OLDE MAN.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:50 (twenty-two years ago)

i turned 27 today. I've not-so-suddenly hit the age where I am morose over my station in life and what i would have preferred. Fuck, i'm still living in ann arbor, for chrissakes, still without an engineering job, and still without a band. ALtho, i am working on the band part, and i'ma gettin' me out of this town when i get a better job.

then again, a think to consider about the fucked-upness of comparing age & accomplishments is when you consider that Sid Vicious died before his 22nd birthday, Ian Curtis offed himself when he was 23(& he had a wife, kid, & a house when he did it), and Ride had happened and broken up when they got to my age.

so maybe our destinies all lie along different paths. for me, the kicker is trying to balance my own schedule for my accomplishments, versus falling into laziness and not getting anything done.

Hell folks, i like in the American Midwest -- most folks are married & spitting out crotchspawnlings from their gated suburban communities by the time they're 23, 24...

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 12:58 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm 25 (I turn 26 in less than a month!). I don't tend to get jealous of those younger than me any more than I worry about the success of people my age or older. Sometimes, I get a little annoyed that my slightly younger friends that didn't go to college make way more money than me, but I'm working on maybe going back to school to get a degree in something I might use this time (and enjoy).

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 13:06 (twenty-two years ago)

I've been 28 for two and a half months now. I really feel like I got stuck in some sort of neutral drive the year I turned 24, and all those "awesome smart people under xx" articles drive me absolutely fucking bats.

― maura (maura), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 13:38 (twenty-two years ago)

(because I should have been one of them)

― maura (maura), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 13:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Dan, I think, is obsessed.

Ally, EVERYONE thought you were in your mid to late twenties. Something about how you were a published journalist known across the oceans.

Larcole's hair metal obsession is intriguing. Her next step is to do a sudden reversal and rehabilitate grunge. She'll be spinning those Stone Temple Pilots albums, oh you'll see.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 13:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Ned you are like the master of hyperbole. Anyway I don't see how it is unusual to be published, I wish I could find my old shit now, I had this great piece that was published about how I thought women should walk around topless. I'd post that shit up on ILX and be like booyah, I was like this when I was 15 too mofos.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 14:08 (twenty-two years ago)

haha, I'm oldest
on the thread so far (indeed,
most of ILX)

thirty-seven is
not the best age that I've been
but it ain't the worst

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 14:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I am 23 yrs old. I do not feel jealous of those my age or younger for their achievements, mostly because the majority of those I know seem pretty miserable. I must hang out with losers.

― Mandee, Tuesday, 12 August 2003 14:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Ned you are like the master of hyperbole.

Well yeah.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 14:25 (twenty-two years ago)

According to Usenet, I'm also Geri Halliwell so I think that makes me approximately 73.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 14:27 (twenty-two years ago)

how are you geri halliwell? i am confused...

― Dave Stelfox (Dave Stelfox), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 14:29 (twenty-two years ago)

We all were, trust me.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 14:30 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm eighteen, and not particularly worried because I'm becoming accustomed to dullness (in terms of creativity) and there are no prodigy ten year old archaeologists I know of.

― Maria (Maria), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 14:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Skipping 88 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

''I love you all.''

even me?

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 20:07 (twenty-two years ago)

He loves you in your ear, Julio.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 20:08 (twenty-two years ago)

No, not you.

― David. (Cozen), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 20:09 (twenty-two years ago)

*squick* *squick* *squick* means "I luv u!"

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 20:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Somewhere that makes sense.

― David. (Cozen), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 20:11 (twenty-two years ago)

I haven't cleaned my ear in two weeks. thanks for the reminder.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 20:25 (twenty-two years ago)

i managed to snap a beer bottle cap through a double smoke ring last friday night.

thank god some of us have something we can view so positively.

still, this thread is extree-deepressing, wot with the timing of it & all.

altho, assuming it stops raining, and my mates come out of the woodwork to join me for a pint tonight(like they BETTER if they know what's good for 'em), it'll all be ok.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 20:29 (twenty-two years ago)

I only post to threads like this if I start them.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 20:46 (twenty-two years ago)

26 (27 in November). I get jealous whenever my older friends brag about their adventures back in the day and I kinda wish I was born at least five years earlier. But I'm glad to have my youth and I want to enjoy it while I can.

― The Four Singing Beatles (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 20:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Also, I've already lived through a lot and sometimes it makes me feel ancient... often when I talk to people who are just a few years younger, they seem REALLY YOUNG to me, and I wonder if it's their own immaturity or if I'm just a goddamned freak.

― The Four Singing Beatles (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 21:01 (twenty-two years ago)

I STAND POIESD ON DA BRINK OF CEL3BRATNG TWENTY-FOUR YAARS OF LIVNG1!1!1! OMG LOL MAH GOAL IN HIGH SKOOL WAS 2 HAEV PUBLISHED S3VERAL SHORT S2REIS BY DA AEG OF EIGHTEN AND MAH FIRST NOV3L BY DA AEG OF TW3NTY-TWO!!1111 BY TEH TIEM I WAS TW3NTY-FIEV I WAS SUPOSAD 2 HAEV BEN A PUBLISHNG PH3NOM3NON11!111!1 SADLY I SEM 2 B IN A PROLONGED STAET OF AR3ST3D D3VELOPMENT AND THASA GOALS HAEV NOT THEYRE BEN ACHEIVED!1!11111 OMG LOL

― jewelly (jewelly), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 21:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Was your novel to be written in the style of that post?

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 21:04 (twenty-two years ago)

jewelly, right now, I kiss you.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 21:06 (twenty-two years ago)

bnw has ushered much joy into my life with the AOLer translator, I must say.

― jewelly (jewelly), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 21:11 (twenty-two years ago)

That joy just stopped me from ushering much unjoy into my life. Work makes me testy. AOL generator makes me lust for life.

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 21:13 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm not clear from many of these posts on what it is people want to have achieved.

― Tep (ktepi), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 21:14 (twenty-two years ago)

so THAT's how it's done...

"here comes johnny YEAH man
with liquor an' drugs
and aol translata
he's gunna confuse up
your wo-ords...."

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 21:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Ally, maybe it because you skipped years of school so were thrown in with an older crowd and learned to act accordingly?

― Mary (Mary), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 22:50 (twenty-two years ago)

i'm very nearly 24 too. i guess i relate to what dee and ally have said a little, only the pressure was from my primary school, not my family. i was about 6 years ahead of my peers in learning but for some reason my teachers thought it was a good idea to keep me at the same level. their excuse was that it would be bad for me socially, as i already had invoked the hatred of everyone my age and older just by being smarter than them, or perhaps because i knew it too. when i was finally allowed to skip standard 3, it was only because my mum fought hard for it. i'm pretty bitter about the whole thing, i wasted so much of my life at primary school when i could have been actually LEARNING.

i have no right to be bitter about it. god, i might've ended up a mathematician instead of a muso. and being a muso is hella fun. i do wish i'd started playing guitar a bit younger, because i'm still nowhere near as technically good as i'd like to be. my primary school experience is probably the reason i'm such a control freak now. i can't STAND for my fate to be out of my own hands, and i despise authority figures.

― The Lady Ms Lurex (lucylurex), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 23:53 (twenty-two years ago)

i should specify: the pressure i felt from my teachers was because the more they held me back, the more i felt i had to prove to them how smart i was, but it just made them hate me more.

― The Lady Ms Lurex (lucylurex), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 23:56 (twenty-two years ago)

i also suspect that this is why i'm so down on my brain capacity - cos nothing i did was ever good enough. though that may also have something to do with me once having a flatmate who took great pains to tell me how stupid i am every day of the year simply because she had her own inferiority complex. heck, thats enough whinging for one day.

― The Lady Ms Lurex (lucylurex), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 00:02 (twenty-two years ago)

According to Plutarch, Julus Caesar wept on his 30th birthday, because Alexander of Macedon had already conquered Asia by that age and Caesar had achieved no comparable grandeur. He'd only been tribune.

By way of contrast (ambitionwise), when I scored *damned* well on a certain standardized test during my callow days in high school, the testing service sent me a congratulatory letter emphasizing how 'the nation looked toward me and those like me to become tomorrow's leaders in science, commerce or government', or some such rot.

My reaction was immediate, visceral and ran along these lines: "Just where do these silly twunts get off telling what I'm supposed to do with my life. I've only got one life; it's mine not theirs, and I intend to spend it as I please. Stupid gits!"

― Aimless, Wednesday, 13 August 2003 00:10 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm not clear from many of these posts on what it is people want to have achieved.

It seems to me like most everyone here is right clever and probably has been told so since they were little. At least, I was, and this is one of the few places where I've thought wow, these folks are smart/funny/quick/insightful. And it's awkward to think in some way (maybe you don't quite believe it, but still) that you're special but haven't done anything special.

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 00:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Sure, but ... like what?

I just think you can excuse yourself from self-disappointment if you can't actually propose an option for what you "could've accomplished." Marriage and kids have been mentioned a couple times here, and while those can be things to be proud of, they're not really accomplishments to envy: anyone can get married. Anyone can have kids. Neither takes any skill nor anything that marks you as different from anyone else. It takes a lot of skill to do it right and keep doing it, sure, but when those things are objects of envy, it seems to be either because they're treated as rites of passage or swanky toys.

If you don't think you've done enough, in other words, what is it you think you should or could have done? If you can't answer that, or the only answers are billion-in-one longshots like "colonize Mars" or "be a superhero" (those'd be mine, circa Tep.1980), then you've got nothing to worry about, right?

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 00:27 (twenty-two years ago)

I mean, I berate myself almost daily because I didn't go to MIT like my parents and haven't invented a new chemical that ends in -onium or something. This is utterly pigfuck insane: within my field, I am very good and rapidly becoming successful. Wishing for more money is one thing, wishing it'd happened when I was a little bit smarter is one thing, but wishing I'd done other things entirely -- things I clearly don't have the right temperament for -- is nuts. I have done a reasonable job of maximizing the things a Tep can do :) I'm not satisfied with that, but I realize I should be.

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 00:37 (twenty-two years ago)

By the time you realise what the odds are of anyone in 3003 recognising your name, the odds have shrunk to zero.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 00:40 (twenty-two years ago)

I still never quite got around to one of the things I was getting at, I think. Blame the massive pain and massive painkillers. Maybe I'm having trouble because I'm obsessively single-minded about the idea of achievement and accomplishment -- for me, it always refers to the same thing, and I don't actually care about being successful at it except insofar as being paid for what I do means I don't have to waste time doing other things. So, a post that says, "I haven't done as much with my musical skill as I wanted to by this age," that I grok. Just wishing for nonspecific accomplishment, though ... I can't figure out what's meant to be filling that blank, if you see what I mean.

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 00:45 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm 27 and I've done some stuff...I guess. I just live around all sorts of "creative" types. I did academic crap for a long time and now I teach academic crap. I don't have a creative "thing"--I don't write much, I don't make music, I don't dj (anymore--I wasn't so hot), I don't dance, I don't paint, I don't play an instrument, I'm not a performance artist...This makes me feel a little less than others, but I'm dealing with it (I hope, because it really sucks to feel like you don't have a "thing").

I've done some things I'm proud of (development work, literacy outreach, volunteering, certain courses I've put together, the few articles I've written), but I don't think too many other folks are impressed. I try just to be happy with my own pats on the back...but sometimes it'd be nice to hear someone say "wow, it's really cool that you teach romantic poetry to folks whose 3rd or 4th language is English" instead of "who do you write for? oh, you don't write? do you spin anywhere? oh, well then, what DO you do?"

― cybele (cybele), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 00:48 (twenty-two years ago)

I coulda been somebody. I coulda been a contender.

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 02:49 (twenty-two years ago)

but sometimes it'd be nice to hear someone say "wow, it's really cool that you teach romantic poetry to folks whose 3rd or 4th language is English" instead of "who do you write for? oh, you don't write? do you spin anywhere? oh, well then, what DO you do?"

I think we ALL think that here about ya. But here's to more saying to you in real life. :-)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 02:52 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm 30 and damn happy to here and enjoying life. It's kind of a trip to watch my body age ... I'm getting a few laugh and smile lines that I think are delicious, and my hair is getting more gray strands by the day. Basically, my body's been through some hellacious times, and as a result I am thankful for each year that I get extra *grin*

― I'm Passing Open Windows (Ms Laura), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 02:52 (twenty-two years ago)

So after 30, it's all gravy? Man, do I need to rearrange my expectations...

― Kenan Hebert (kenan), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 02:56 (twenty-two years ago)

*sips wine, munches on a bit of food, enjoys life in SoCal* Yup, she's right!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 02:57 (twenty-two years ago)

I've lived about three lives by anyone's reckoning. I'm 39, look younger (no surgical help thank you very much). I'm happy. Most people can't get this much in in *one* life.

― Orbit (Orbit), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 02:59 (twenty-two years ago)

I apologise for this thread

― Alex in Rotherham (Alex in Doncaster), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 07:24 (twenty-two years ago)

20, wouldn't mind being older in order to be where I want to be without the hard work. I guess I can't complain, 20's a funny age. I'm happy enough. I can't see age making much of a difference, I don't feel much societal pressure to accomplish a whole lot, but I do put alot on myself, not enough though my ambition is not mirrored by mt workrate.

― Ronan (Ronan), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 07:40 (twenty-two years ago)

I also went to school with this lady. She was the year below me. Verily, we are all failures next to her.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 09:02 (twenty-two years ago)

26 in three months and not very

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 10:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm 27, can't say I've ever thought about people younger than myself being more successful than me, or at least being bitter about it. I know I'm fundamentally flawed when it comes to motivation. Hope springs eternal, so good luck to everyone.

― jel -- (jel), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 15:55 (twenty-two years ago)

37 (38 in October). Still figuring stuff out as I go along...

― Chris Barrus (Chris Barrus), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 23:38 (twenty-two years ago)

I'll be old as fuck in four days, but I find freedom through failure.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Wednesday, 13 August 2003 23:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Well, you get up every morning
And you see, it's still the same
All the floors and all the walls
And all the rest remains
Nothing changes fast enough
The hurry, worry days
It makes you want to give it up
And drift into a haze
Revelations seems to be another way
To make the days go faster anyways
We're all exchanging pleasantries
No matter how we feel
And no one knows the difference
'Cause it all seems so unreal
You'd better grab a hold of something
Simple but it's true
If you don't stop to smell the roses now
They might end up on you
Expectations only mean you really think you know
What's coming next, and you don't
Yearbooks with their autographs
From friends you might have had
These are your important years
You'd better make them last
Falling in and out of love just like...
These are your important years, your life

Once you've seen the light, you finally
Realize it might end up all right
It might end up all right now

i dunno -- seemed kinda relevant.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Thursday, 14 August 2003 01:41 (twenty-two years ago)

Ally, maybe it because you skipped years of school so were thrown in with an older crowd and learned to act accordingly?

Haha yeah, look at the Pizza Christ thread for proof ;)

The relevant song for this thread is "Glory Days" by Pulp. "Oh I could be a genius if I just put my mind to it, and I...I could do anything, if only I could get round to it."

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 14 August 2003 02:26 (twenty-two years ago)

You were brought up on the space race...

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 14 August 2003 02:30 (twenty-two years ago)

thank god that's not the springsteen version...

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Thursday, 14 August 2003 02:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Now they expect you to clean toilets. When you've seen how big the world is, how can you make do with this?

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 14 August 2003 02:31 (twenty-two years ago)

True fact: That song came on in a bar and I got so depressed that I immediately resolved to return to school and eventually quit my godforesaken job.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 14 August 2003 02:32 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm 33, & most of my self-loathing comparisons are to people I went to school with, all of whom are now rich and famous and, like, running countries. I'm mostly pretty happy with what I've done & where I've gotten, although I suspect I've made a few serious missteps that have cost me a few years in doing what I want to do. There are various things I regret not having done when I was younger, most of which fit into other people's "oh those were my wild younger years" category. I think the biggest one was not being in a band that got to do a serious tour. I mean, two years ago I got to fill in playing bass w/ a band I liked on tour for a week, and that was absolute heaven as far as I was concerned.

― Douglas (Douglas), Thursday, 14 August 2003 03:12 (twenty-two years ago)

21 and feel pretty much the same as Ronan. I feel like I'm doing *more* than those around me but the challenge is to focus that *more* down to a single coherent narrative that's gonna get me somewhere.

― Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Thursday, 14 August 2003 06:40 (twenty-two years ago)

31 and fine with that execpt for moments when i sort of realize, 'oh wow i'm in my 30s', working in a field i love, doing interesting stuff, generally happy except for the lack of decent pay so far.

― H (Heruy), Thursday, 14 August 2003 07:15 (twenty-two years ago)

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